|Reviews for The Natural Balance|
| Mona again chapter 1 . 10/4/2012
Suddenly it dawned on him what the feeling was. He was happy.
haha instant flashback to the episode where Bruce is saying ' I feel so light, feeling no worries...what is it. Batgirl: It's called happiness. Bruce: Whatever it is, I like it (IN grumpy voice) ...hahahhahahaahahahaa
Don't Steal Bruce's happiness :)
| MonaTheGreat chapter 1 . 8/25/2012
"A most fine experiment, most fine, most fine", he muttered as he dragged the former Alice away. Then mentally kicked himself as soon as he realized what he was doing. The Hatter's ramblings were starting to get to him.
This was my favorite line!
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 20 . 12/8/2010
It can be kind of tricky to finish up a story if there's little left to be said and I'm guessing that's why it took so long to crank this last bit out. That being said, the whole bit with the rampaging villains corresponding with the elements of evil they usually represent was very interesting and worth the price of admission. Well, if there was a price anyway.
I honestly think that you're beating yourself up a little when it comes to your portrayals of Bruce and Pamela. Personally I think the biggest issue of this story, if one could call it that, was that there were so many interesting things and characters all rumbling about (Riddler, Scarecrow, Hatter, Floyd, and the GCPD) that the characters you set up to be the mains kind of got lost in the crossfire. It's a mistake that's easy to spot but hard to adjust to when you've already got a story going and I think that's what led to whatever issues you may have had with this.
That claim made, this was a good story that didn't get near the feedback it deserves. I hope it doesn't get in the way of any future writing and I'll be waiting on the story with The Scarecrow.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 19 . 11/6/2010
Aflame with shame is almost as bad as my Etrigan rhymes. . . Not nearly as bad as my alliteration but I do appreciate your self-deprivation.
No! Floyd is being harassed again! What did he ever do to anybody I ask you except for being pretty! Then again, he at least got a few decent lines before Batman took the merciful choice to take him out.
And, well, I've got to admit that after all the great encounters we've seen with Riddler, Scarecrow and The Mad Hatter, I have to admit that Batman vs. Poison Ivy seemed a little anticlimactic to me. Again, this may be because Isley has always seemed quite cut and dry for me but I wasn't really feeling it. The innocents in the crossfire were a nice touch and the bit of Bruce finding his second wind through the memories of his mother was an excellent touch but it just didn't seem as great as a lot of the other stuff in this story. The pacing of it was good and the action within the piece was passable but it just seemed like Isley was just doing a sales pitch before her inevitable fall.
Again, a good story over all. I just wasn't really feeling this chapter is all.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 18 . 10/10/2010
Well, congrats to the good people of the G.C.P.D. in taking down The Scarecrow. Took a little bit of added assistance from Emily (my second favorite OC throughout this series) but the real Big Bad Harv (at least I think it was Bullock) managed to get the job done. In fact, both battles were well done given the time they were allowed and offered plenty of time for the individual characters to shine. Still, sort of like you said to me earlier, Roman had about as much chance winning that fight as my Packers have of finding a running game.
I guess the only real note of criticism I would have sort of runs along the same as the last few chapters in that there are a LOT of people to focus on here. Of course, that's going to be a problem with any long story you put out there but it just seems to me that this climax is occasionally muddled by wondering which character we should really be paying attention to. The Back Mask part, for example, was clearly leading in to his demise but, at least from the context of the story, we didn't really know him enough from this story to put too much emotional impact behind it. Now, I grant you that something like this can be removed in terms that this is fanfiction but it doesn't quite fly in a real story.
That being said, it was another strong chapter overall and I'm looking forward to seeing what's next. Sorry it took so long for the response and, once again, this story deserves a lot more feedback than it gets.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 17 . 9/26/2010
Well, it seemed that you were quite determined to get Hatter's role finished in this chapter. The battle, as purposefully confusing as it was, did make for some interesting points through the insanity (although I do have to agree that some of the visual imagery just didn't work when put to paper as it were [Hatter's head detaching, in particular]). That being said, the ravens flying, diving, and writing was a nice touch but I do have to wonder how Batman managed to take out the other dozen or so troops. Granted, they were probably pretty messed up in their own right but they still seemed plenty determined to bring Bats down.
So the battle between Bruce and Jervis was good but I have to admit that I'm really interested in seeing how the G.C.P.D. fares against Sionis. I have a strong feeling that Bats will be able to swoop in and save the day but I also think the guy already has enough to do and it would be nice to see Jimbo and the boys win one on their own. Or maybe Floyd will man up and just take out Roman and Isley. 'Cause that would be pretty sweet.
Good luck finishing this in three chapters though. As I've said before, it's a shame that more people don't read this because you deserve a lot more credit than you're getting.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 16 . 8/30/2010
Okay, now I officially understand and like your version of Sir Jervis Tetch. The whole picturing of Hatter being dangled upside down with his life in peril and him just remaining just calm and collected is priceless. It was also nice to see some doubts in Isley as she considered her reason d'etre but it's not surprising in the least to see that she's trying to go through with it. That being said, the whole bit between Tetch and Roman still hasn't really struck a chord with me.
And poor, poor Floyd. Of all the people that could help Batman get his badass mojo on it had to be you. Maybe it doesn't really pay to be a gangster after all.
That being said, I have to admit that the scene with Scarecrow's return was more than a little rushed. I have no real argument with using the anonymous police detective as your perspective point but I think the shock surprise the quick explanation provided would have paled in comparison with using a more established character (Bullock? Montoya?) and firing it from their persepctive. Still, everyone is pretty busy as it is so I supposed you had to take what you could get in order to get what you wanted.
And I suppose I will allow a few trumpets to sound in reference to the added detail. Seriously though, the longer paragraphs did help donate a great deal more to the detailing of your scene rather than just shoot it off into a bunch of different, but potentially necessary, connections. It's another good chapter but, were I to give advice, just remember to keep allowing some of your readers to do the heavy lifting. It may not net you the number of reviews you may want but those who do will thank you for it.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 15 . 8/21/2010
As much as I love seeing Batman and Floyd back, I have to admit that all the set-up for the story is starting to get to me. I mean, the story itself is hardly bad and part of it can be blamed that I'm reading it chapter-by-chapter but it just seems like we've been waiting a long time for something to happen. We seem to be getting a little bit of that from Ivy discussing her plans to Floyd but, strictly as a critic, I'm still trying to figure out what Black Mask is doing here.
So Floyd and Isley was nice and it was good to see Batman and Gordon chew the fat. In fact, it was all pretty good (plethora of one-lined paragraphs aside). I guess I'm just getting impatient.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 14 . 8/1/2010
Why am I the only one who is reviewing this story? I mean, it's a whole lot better than a lot of the other stories out there with a whole lot more reviews!
You ever think about throwing in a Batman/Joker romance? The kids seem to love that these days.
Okay, to the serious review. I have to admit that all the one-line paragraphs had begun to gnaw at me at somewhere around the halfway point of the chapter. I don't know, maybe it's just my prediliction towards overexplanation but short paragraphs tend to lose their oomph if they're overemployed. I mean, if somebody sees too many things that they're instinctually asked to focus upon than they just might lose interest. Just something to think about, is all.
As for my goodbye to The Riddler, I've gotta admit that I would have thought that Nigma would be a little more eloquent in defeat but, on the other hand, it makes sense that all the flowery and intimidating prose would break down the moment he got physically hurt. Sort of like the bully who gets punched in the nose and runs away like a little puss. Well, it may not be the most glorious way to go out but I certainly enjoyed Eddie while he was here.
And Floyd's back! And Isley is treating him with some kind of dignit that makes me like her. That being said, Floyd did seem to have a lot of Xander Harris-like quipping and something like that is only good in short doses in my mind. The rest of the chapter was fairly hit-or-miss for me, largely because of all the one-line paragraphs, although it was nice to see Gordon organizing his troops and Crane making his reappearance in a surprisingly shadowy way. Makes me interested in what you're going to do with him.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 13 . 7/17/2010
Well, I don't know if I'm the loud glee type but I'll take the compliments where I can. Also, I can't help but think that you were trying to say something to me with Batman emerging from his battle without his boots. . . Eh, maybe I'm just paranoid.
And it looks like another psycho has tromped into town in the form of one Roman Sionis. Almost always a good character to bring in the fold so long as he's done correctly and me thinks that you shall. Also had to feel for poor Giovanni. Doesn't appear that this brave new world has much room for a standard, everyday gangster. That being said, I've got to say that his suicide was more than a little melodramatic but I suppose I can't fault you if that's what you were shooting for.
You know, I actually found myself surprised when Emily managed to get out as "unscathed" as she had. I mean, I figured Crane was pretty worse for wear but looks like the lady did all right for herself, potential psychoses aside. Also, and this is a somewhat educated guess, it seems that Odin is saying hello to The Scarecrow from his spot at Yggdrasil although, for the life of me, I can't really understand why. . .
I can understand how you might be frustrated with how the chapter came out but all the "random" chaos came together more often than not. I know you might be a little perturbed with what to do with Isley but the advantage of all the plot avenues you've developed is that you don't have to rely on her to draw attention. That being said, it's got to tie together sooner or later. . . Just how long is this story anyway?
That being said, I do hope it goes on more than a little bit longer (albeit with an eventual end to Isley's rampage). Good work as always!
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 12 . 7/4/2010
By the rivers of Babylon, huh? Well, I suppose that's as good of a pledge as any, in my mind. And since we're on the rambling train, I've never really pictured Batman going to war with Armani boots. Just doesn't seem right is all.
Okay, we definitely saw some forward progress in the story while some of the other plot angles are spinning and developing and this is a good thing. I had to admit that it took a couple paragraphs to recognize that it was the vision of the Scarecrow's victim. Not certain if that was a good thing but it was certainly an interesting thing and if this is the end of the Scarecrow in this story then at least he went out on a good note.
I don't really have much to say about the Gordon parts and even less about Bullock but Harley definitely stole the show here. You know I'm a fan of psychological conundrums and it's nice to explain some of the character's motivations rather than have the readers form their own impression. It makes the story your own in my mind. Also, I was fairly happy that The Joker didn't get thrown into the mix. There's enough heels in this party already.
Sorry it took so long to review. Doing what I can to catch up though.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 11 . 6/29/2010
Well, I attribute the chapter title to the creator of the AK-47 but I suppose that everyoe is entitled to their own perspective.
This was another strong chapter what with the continuing struggle between Eddie and the good doctor, Gio's little soliloquy and, of course, good ol' Floyd. Harley gets more than her share of points for being a fan of Smooth Criminal (my second favorite Batman song) and the introduction of Catwoman should make for an interesting potential turn.
That being said, I can't help but admit that I'm waiting for something to happen. Granted, I've done more than my fair share of setting the table but it just seems like there's certain parts of the story (points directly to the Isley part) where we've just waited so long for something to happen. The slowly broadening "plague" on Gotham is one thing but all the other parts of the story carry their own weight and it just seems to make the main villain plotline look a little weak in comparison since it isn't given enough time. This isn't to say that it isn't interesting or that the story isn't good but it just seems like there's a whole lot of juggling going on and that can only draw a reader in for so long.
Sorry if this didn't make much sense. Your characterization is great and the stories you're creating is superb. I'm just wondering what it all means on the whole.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 10 . 6/17/2010
Okay, this thing just swallowed my first review whole so forgive me if I keep this one short. The scene with Eddie and the good doctor was definitely my favorite bit since it gave Eddie an opportunity to appear as a threat in a setting where he should be anything but given all the grade-A psychos that already inhabit the place. I have to admit that I still can't get into the Scarecrow scenes but maybe it's just a matter of having more interesting things happening around it. And I do like watching poor Floyd bad, bad day.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 9 . 6/5/2010
Y'know, between worrying about getting killed by his boss and probably getting killed by Isley, it's just not a good day to be Floyd. Gotta sympathize with him, I say.
I could make quite the heady debate with The Riddler debating Batman's true work in Gotham but I'll just sum up by saying that, like all good arguments, there are some truths and manipulations to it. I mean, people without absolute power rarely ever feel content with what they have. Of course, that could also just be Eddie's way of riling up the good doctor and coercing her into making a mistake. Still, whatever the case, a good chapter for Eddie.
I don't think that you depicted Jim as thinking himself incompetent but as frustrated. I mean, so much of Gordon's strugglesis supplying a metaphor for the inevitable struggles the world throws at you. He can't do everything he's expected to do, he can't do everything he wants to do to protect Gotham, but that won't stop him from trying to do good and that's all any of us can do sometimes.
For lack of a more efficient term, I'd say that Tetch was the weak point of the chapter. Maybe it was just the matter that I don't really feel invested with the character in this story because I don't think it was because of your writing but I think he's just a victim of having so much going on at once. It's a struggle I usually feel in my stories and there really isn't a good solution for it, is there?
Still, it's also better to have too much potentially good stuff than not enough. Good work, comrade.
| Matt the Batman Fan chapter 8 . 5/9/2010
I'm not certain what to say about this chapter but I also couldn't stop myself from reading it either. Maybe it was just that most of the characters don't really appeal to me from a general perspective (save for Floyd, oddly enough) but the chapter was sold on a whole, especially since it's pretty clear we're on the slow build to the next big plot point. The only pet peeve I've really got was the lack of page breaks since that occasionally confused matters. That being said, the chapter did its job but it didn't really leave much of an impact on me.
Just my two cents is all.