|Reviews for Identity|
| anonymous chapter 1 . 10/22/2009
I want Cass to become the new Spoiler. It's oddly symmetrical that way.
| Lorendiac chapter 1 . 10/18/2009
Some stray thoughts . . .
I haven't been reading the newest Batgirl series. (I didn't bother reading the recent miniseries about Cassandra as Batgirl, as written by Beechen, either.) So I've just VAGUELY heard that Cassandra was announced to have quit the role abruptly, after Bruce was gone and generally presumed dead. It's nice to see Dick (in your version, anyway) trying to be reasonably patient and sympathetic about the whole thing.
To tell the truth, I usually just ignore the "official" Post-COIE version of how Dick quit being Robin. It never made much sense to me - near as I can recall, the various Batman comics published around 1987 or thereabouts seemed to be saying that Bruce's attitude had been the following: "I'm going to fire the Robin I've been training for years, because it's too dangerous for him, as demonstrated by how he got hurt - but then I'll turn around and recruit a much younger tire thief to take over the role of Robin, because it's really not so dangerous after all, and he's not likely to ever get hurt!" Talk about wild mood swings . . .
I greatly prefer the Pre-COIE version that came out just a few years earlier, synchronized to happen at the same time in the "Batman" and "New Teen Titans" comic books, with Dick deciding entirely on his own that it was time to quit being Robin and move on to something else; then he traveled back to the Batcave and voluntarily handed a Robin costume to Jason Todd (who'd been trying to come up with a brand new heroic alias for himself) and encouraged him to take over as the new Robin! Perfectly friendly and rational!
Now for a few bits of "constructive criticism":
* Something was different this time, though. The city looked...brighter. Cleaner. Not that that means much with Gotham.
She rubbed her eyes, and realized what was different: it's her eyes, not the city. This is the first time she'd looked down upon the city like this without the darkened lenses that were the eyes of Batgirl. *
It's confusing to see you switching verb tenses, from past to present and back again. Most of the time in this story, you're keeping it all happening in the past, but in the passage I just quoted you also have "means much" and "it's her eyes" and "This is the first." That should have been "meant much" and "it was her eyes" and "This was the first." As it now stands, the reader can quickly get very confused regarding whether this story will be set "in the past" or "in the present."
I'd also consider changing "not that that means" to "not that this meant" - because I've seen advice over the years to the effect that whenever possible, we should AVOID such phrasing as "that that" or "had had" in the middle of a sentence, even when it's grammatically correct. Because it might give a reader the WRONG impression, at first glance, that the writer was basically "stuttering" by needlessly repeating a word!
* Which was why it hurt so much to watch the man who had almost silently landed behind her. *
The way you have that, the word "almost" could mean that he almost landed, but not quite. And that the landing (which he didn't quite succeed in doing) was a silent one. I don't think that was what you meant, though. I'd rearrange the words a little:
Which was why it hurt so much to watch the man who had landed almost silently behind her.
That version makes it more clear that he definitely succeeded in landing - it was ONLY the "silently" part that didn't quite work out!
| anon chapter 1 . 10/16/2009
Well I certainly like that, I mean at first I was like hey Cass you're pretty smart you know the fight never ends, not really you can quit it's your choice if that is what you really want but there is never a win, best circumstances Bruce grows old and dies what then
I will always prefer villains who at least have a point and frighteningly may even be right about everyone being better off under their benevolent dictatorship (of course make education great so the common man does know what is best for him and his children's children and democratic republicanism can work) like Ra's al Ghul if the environment isn't brought into balance no matter the means or cost the future for the human race will be worse than any dystopian fiction and will lead to the extinction of the human race not through misadventure but suicide through stupidity or Lex Luthor who as he says if he was calling all the shots could end famine and cure cancer and he could his mind is capable of anything perhaps give everyone ultra high-tech non polluting technology and maybe even superpowers lead humanity and the rest of the universe to unimaginable glory remember Red Son he united all humanity and led us to a golden age that lasted millions of years
A lot of villains seem unaware that if they used their mind and/or other talents for legitimate business causes or the government could be far more profitable than any crime spree
Of course vigilantes can be sanctimonious hypocrites judging others and letting themselves go unscrutinized condemning others when they do the same thing for less reasons I think it is disgusting they don't share their scientific breakthroughs with the scientific specifically medical community or their skills with law enforcement agencies far more good than beating up thugs and psychos fight crime at its source ignorance and poverty. I realize due to rarity and complexity mass production may not always be possible or at least cost effective and due to difficulty not all could take brutal training but a little bit could go a very, very long way. The ability to think of future generation when calculating pragmatic utilitarianism is what separates us from the animals. The world is not the way it is because of thugs and psychopaths but because most people are too stupid to know what is best for them the extreme left and extreme right get caught up in their ideals and refuse to acknowledge brutal facts of reality no real world understanding of the extreme complexities of politics, economics, technological logistics, and how they’re all interconnected in the long run. People want everything right here right now the whole world just handed to them on a silver platter think just by complaining something will happen without a tangible plan. Such a plan will require a lot of long, hard, boring work all day every day for generations.
I'm glad the government has Suicide Squad, Cadmus, Checkmate, the Elite, Amanda Waller, and the new female Spy Smasher, I'd include the Secret Six but I think from now on even if they're not going to be full fledged villains they stood up to the worse villains and are pure mercenaries I think