|Reviews for Spirit|
| Liapold chapter 1 . 6/16/2012
I'm really sad that this story hasn't had one review in almost three years because it's excellent. I love the way you wrote it, I love that you mixed in elements from the Japanese and English versions, and I love the very idea behind the story: what the pharaoh was doing during one of the most important duels in the series, one that would have ended it if things had turned out differently. And I think Dark Bakura's appearance really added to the story, even if that wasn't your intention, it works. And you made Yami seem very vulnerable, which is good, because I think that's something we see little of in the actual series.
Besides that, there seem to be instances where you use a different word than the one you mean to, here's one example:
"How strong can I be if I can't even safe those who matter most to me? "
You probably mean save, but it happens a couple of other times in this piece, so you could reread it and fix that.
Other than that, this story's great. But I guess only shipping stories and pr0n get reviews.