|Reviews for Inconceivable|
| Amber1983 chapter 1 . 9/23/2010
OMG this is absolutely friggin' hilarious! Could not stop laughing out loud! Fave moments include:
Disturbing, yet somehow his penis misinterpreted his nausea as arousal and got hard.
"Stop picturing me like that," Edward snapped. "As if I would wear a thong—and why don't I hear a belt being unbuckled?"
Edward was seated primly at the bottom of the bed, his hands folded over his nest of pubic curls. - this put such a clear and funny image in my head!
"come devils and hellfire, nothing can get this sucker down."
Or maybe they were both narcissistic and dug being blond together - genius.
"I suddenly have the urge to be extremely accommodating," Emmett blurted.
Alice and Rosalie were appalled. When the child was old enough for high school, they would have to hang out with a person named Carsper.
"The video was edited to Motely Crue's Dr. Feel Good," Rose said. "I think we all know who's the star."
And here I thought it wasn't possible to love him anymore..." Edward crooned. He planted a kiss on the infant's forehead, and then jerked his head away before the baby bit his lip off.
You are a legend. This my first time reading crack and think you may have opened a floodgate now! Your brain amuses me.
| Robpfan chapter 1 . 9/22/2010
lol... this was by far the funniest slash/pregnancy/vamp story I've ever read on here... thumbs up... :)
| reve2weaver chapter 1 . 9/18/2010
"Oh! Oh golly, Emmett!
"We get it!" cried a clear, pixie-like voice. "Soon we're going to have babies to play with!"
Whenever they got bored with eavesdropping, they debated the pros and cons of "Untamed Plum" or "Platinum Pearl." Rose waved at them. "Having fun going gay?" "Ugh, who invited them?" Edward muttered.
On cue, Emmett heard giggles and frantic shushing in the hallway.
He rested Miss Manners on the table stand, marking his place so he could return to it later tonight, and smiled. This should be interesting.
After a long, gory birth, the child was finally delivered.
His body healed completely after pregnancy, leaving no stretch marks or scars. The fat was reabsorbed into the venom. He was restored to the nubile underwear model that he had been before
Baby booties... Hee-snort.
| Artemis1000 chapter 1 . 8/18/2010
| LauralHill chapter 1 . 8/16/2010
"Edward was lounging about the library, reading Miss Manners Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior, when he felt the first cramps of labor."
| WileyWasabi chapter 1 . 7/28/2010
Laughed my ass off...this was just too, too funny. Would have loved to see more of them dealing with being pregnant boys in school, though.
| slowpoke15hi5 chapter 1 . 7/24/2010
LMAO. I found this little ditty while looking at info about the new backslash contest. I was looking through the info about past winners and noticed that I hadn't read this one yet so I read the summary and then, well I almost didn't read it. One of my general rules is no Mpreg. But I saw that it was humor and for the life of me I can't pass up a good slash humor. So it went like this...
but it's Mpreg
but it's HUMOR
but it's Mpreg
Oh for the love of God suck it up and read it- it's humor
Oh for the love of God, it's Mpreg- as in male pregnancy
yes, but it's funny male pregnancy...
As you can see, I finally gave in and stopped arguing with myself. And boy am I happy I did. I can't really see Carlisle and Jasper together but that was really the only thing I had a problem with- well that and the name of the baby- Carsper- really? Gross.
Anywho, this story was a great laugh and I'm really glad I read it. My parents aren't so glad though (as I woke them up when I laughed so hard) but I'm sure they will get over it :) And my nose isn't so glad (as I spewed my coffee out my nose when I laughed- an experience that was both painful and hilarious in its own way) but the burn as stopped so I will get over it.
My favorite lines include:
"Aren't we supposed to strike fear into the hearts of men?" Emmett frowned. "How can vampires be terrifying if the dudes have pregnancy bumps?"
"Oh! Oh golly, Emmett! Harder, yeah, move just like that—NO! NO! STOP! For Christ's sake, you have the finesse of a blind rhinoceros—"
"Pssh, come devils and hellfire, nothing can get this sucker down."
"This... Mike Newton fellow... he wouldn't, perchance, be related to Sir Isaac?"
"Indubitably," Edward lied
"What the shit man?"
"Like, sometimes I think of you like a seahorse, carrying the babies..."
Carlisle scrunched up his face in exasperation. "You know, I never thought of it before, but why did I get stuck with the power-to-be-pussy-whipped?"
Headline: Glittery Old Farts Torn Limb-from-Limb by Pregnant Avenger!
"I couldn't help it. The camera loved him."
I couldn't pick just one line-sorry. This story was just filled with awesome. About the only thing that would have made it more awesome would have been Edward or Emmett killing Bella so the baby could have virgin human blood :) Thanks again for writing.
| izziey chapter 1 . 7/21/2010
the funniest slash i've ever read. probably the ONLY funny slash i read. thanks for the laugh!
| ChristinaG2 chapter 1 . 7/17/2010
This story was horrifyingly hilarious and surprisingly I LOVED the fact that there was no Bella.
| Jaspergirl1123 chapter 1 . 7/14/2010
that was intresting... and hysterical. i laughed untill i cried and then some. -Sam
| rainydayjude chapter 1 . 4/26/2010
Your brain seems like such an awesome place. Crasper. Its just plain genius.
| mugglemom08 chapter 1 . 4/7/2010
I just don't even have the words...I'm not sure if this was hilarious or horrifying or both.
| Katarzyna93cr chapter 1 . 1/19/2010
oh my gosh I dont think I've ever felt so ammused,disgusted and surprised in one story
Haha Ive never laughed so hard and now i think my face is stuck in its WTF? version.
Edwards birth really cracked me up. I just simply loved it when he pointed at Emmetts penis with the broken vase. Completely Priceless (caps and everything)
| teleshawna chapter 1 . 1/11/2010
*Wiping tears away* that was so funny. Laughing out loud like a fool. LOLLAF right? I don't usually read crack even though it is funny I find it hard to follow. This was an easy to follow story but it was all fucked up...shit...in a good way. This is why I don't review. I suck.
| ISparkleOnMyOwn chapter 1 . 1/10/2010
i cant tell you how often i had to put my laptop away to prevent it from falling to the floor. i was simply laughing too hard. really craptastic and incredibly funny!