Reviews for I'm Surrounded by Idiots and Dead People
arashi kanami chapter 8 . 1/5/2011
wow...i think you're story is really cool!the yyh characters aren't ooc and you're character are the coolest!especially kara!-...please update as soon as possible!this story has great potential!
SolitaryNyght chapter 8 . 10/30/2010
I like it and Hope you update soon!
Neko-fire demon tempest chapter 8 . 9/30/2010
update soon please!
The Typhon Serpent chapter 3 . 9/16/2010
Alright, this is going to be difficult. Please believe me, I'm a very calm person and I'm only trying to help, I'm far from a flamer.

While I'm not too crazy on the present-tense style, it does seem to work for you. Unlike most authors who try to write that way, you do it very well and I have yet to catch any big typos. I think you should be a bit more descriptive. Yes, you've talked about the character's clothing, which is an area that many authors forget about, but what about their surroundings? What's the weather like? They're at Koenma's house in this chapter, right? Does it have two stories? Three? Four? Is the architecture from another century or is it modern?

There are two areas you need major improvement on. The idea of a necromancer character is creative, but Kara's powers don't appear to have visible flaws. Yusuke and Kuwabara's downfall is that their powers are limited by how much spirit energy they have. Wear that down and they run out of juice and even pass out. But Kara can borrow energy whenever she feels like it. Is there a cap too how much energy she can borrow? Or is there a possibility of her absorbing too much energy and losing control of her minions? Kurama and Hiei's combat flaws lie in their personality. Kurama is too trusting, Hiei is too confident. But Kara and Alli are both brave, wary of their enemies, and unusually strong. Is their downfall the fact that they don't know their own limits? You should also consider going a bit more into their development. How did they meet Koenma? Is Kara from a family of necromancers that he employs? Did he run into her on a trip to the human world? Does he just keep tabs on necromancers? How did Kara and Alli meet and when did they learn about each other's powers?

The second thing that's REALLY getting on my nerves is the way you bash Kuwabara. Just because he's a comic relief doesn't mean he only exists for us to hate him. He HAS a personality. For starters, he's not a coward; in fact, he's too brave for his own good but he's still not the type to hide behind Yusuke especially since he won't admit to Yusuke being better than him. He's also NOT a complete moron. He's headstrong and he lacks elegance, but he proved in episode 3 that he DOES have booksmarts and can use them when he puts his mind to it.

There IS room for improvement, which is why I haven't called (dare I say it?) "Mary-Sue". But, I'm sorry, unless you can assure me that you improved on these things in future chapters or that you plan to improve on them, I'm not going to finish reading this.
Angel of Randomosity chapter 8 . 9/13/2010
Seriously? Despite the fact that I love Hiei an' all, I'd still kick his butt for that.

Dude that is such a freakin coencadense! Me an' my best-friend are exactly like them! We met freshmen year an' we act like twins. She's older than me by a year but shorter than myself. We're juniors in HS now.

An' btw. You're story is AwEsOmE! Please upsate soon!
Angel of Randomosity chapter 8 . 9/13/2010
Seriously? Despite the fact that I love Hiei an' all, I'd still kick his butt for that.

Dude that is such a freakin coencadense! Me an' my best-friend are exactly like them! We met freshmen year an' we act like twins. She's older than me by a year but shorter than myself. We're juniors in HS now.

An' btw. You're story is AwEsOmE! Please upsate soon!
Haruka Oujo chapter 8 . 9/12/2010
sometimes Hiei can be a real jerk. Oh well, that's the way he works and he usually is lying when he says mean things to his friends. i love him for that 3 anyways, it seems things are getting more interesting, wonder what all this could mean? lol "That may have been the most annoying sound I've ever heard." perfect Hiei line.

Haruka Oujo :)
Haruka Oujo chapter 1 . 6/13/2010
red, blue... now all we need is yellow and not only would we have all of the primary colors but we'd also have the first pokemon gen! (well... the american one because green never came out in america) lol they thought they were rapists! xD
Kinne chapter 1 . 4/4/2010
You should consider getting a beta for this story; it really lacks a lot of description so it's hard to picture what's going on when you have so much dialogue. Another thing concerning your characters, the fact that one of their names is Alli along with your SN being the same name is probably what's screaming Mary-Sue to those reviewers like Tacobell and Janelle etc. Mind you, I'm just being helpful and in no way should this be considered a flame. Please feel free to pm me if you have any questions )
Last Insanity chapter 6 . 4/2/2010
This is for Tacobell. Please just do us all a favor and stop leaving all of these reviews. You are only taking up space that could be used by someone who is not going out of their way to be a jerk. Also, if you really hate this story some much, stop reading it and spare us all your over excessive cursing. Really, it only makes you sounds stupid and low class.

I'm sure everyone else and I would appreciate it if you would just get a life and stop going out of your way to make people who you've never even met. It's actually quite sad actually.

But now you have me wondering, how many other people are you doing this to? Clearly you seem to get a certain amount of joy from being like this to people.

Feel free to be a jerk to me, like you are to AlliElizabeth, but would that really get you anywhere? Even now, by being an obnoxious louse, you're not accomplishing much. Keep that in mind next time you feel the need to be an pest.

Sincerely,

Last Insanity
Heve-chan chapter 6 . 4/2/2010
Well, the last reviews were harsh... I don't know what to tell you. I told you that your story has many weak points, but I don't think it's completely mary sue. You are still hurrying the events. But I think you could do a good job if you try harder. You said you write for fun, but try work on the descriptions and characters originality.

And about the flames... *sigh* I think the insults were unnecessary. Both of you should have kept your dignity, throwing words like 'bitch' and other examples is not something honorable at all...
Just being helpful chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
To save, whomever the trouble; a Mary-Sue:

In literary criticism and particularly in fanfiction, is a fictional character with overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as a wish-fulfillment fantasy for the author or reader. Perhaps the single underlying feature of all characters described as "Mary Sues" is that they are too ostentatious for the audience's taste, or that the author seems to favor the character too highly. The author may seem to push how exceptional and wonderful the "Mary Sue" character is on his or her audience, sometimes leading the audience to dislike or even resent the character fairly quickly; such a character could be described as an "author's pet".

"Mary Sues" can be either male or female, but male characters are often dubbed "Gary Stu", "Marty Stu", or similar names.[1] While the label "Mary Sue" itself originates from a parody of this type of character, most characters labeled "Mary Sues" by readers are not intended by authors as such.

(PS) I am not calling your characters a Mary-Sue, just leaving the definition for anyone who needs to be reminded of what one is.
Crazy anime chick since 1993 chapter 6 . 3/31/2010
O.o you stopped at a good part! Shame on you. That's kind of mean. Please hurry and write some more that was awesome.
TimesUnfetteredImaginationBomb chapter 6 . 3/30/2010
oo snap things are heating up! can't wait for the next update!
Heve-chan chapter 5 . 3/19/2010
Hi again! :)

I'm glad you updated. I liked the chapter.

I saw that you improved since the last time you posted. The beginning was a bit confusing because I didn't know what Benadryl pills were and only after the scene with the cat I figured out that Kana was allergic and for that reason she swallowed them. Evan now, I'm not really sure she was allergic... care to explain next time, pls? :D

I noticed, as well, that you started to describe a bit more. Could you try harder? It's good what you've done until now, but there is always place for better. You didn't rush the events this chapter, that's good.

As for your OCs, I don't see them as Mary Sue at all. The idea of shape-shifter OC isn't as common as a fire ice demon thought the necromancer is still interesting and very original I dare to say (extra point here).

You managed to keep Kurama and Hiei well in their character, another point scored. I'm curious how you'll describe the other detectives and YYH characters.

That's all I wanted to tell you. I hope my words helped you and the next chapter will be posted sooner. Keep up the good work and good luck! :)
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