|Reviews for Building Keitaro|
| Strikeman chapter 4 . 2/18
So Haruka just doesn't understand how trauma or abuse works, is that it? This really wasn't a good chapter. I mean, the majority of it was okay, but the ending just ruined it completely. To Keitaro and Kanako, Mitsune is the threat. She's the unhealthy one. And I'm pretty sure that Haurka would understand this if she even thought about it logically. They've been emotionally and even physically abused by an alcoholic for years, then they come into contact with another one, of course they're not gonna react favorably.
Haruka doesn't fault the girls of Hinata for treating Keitaro badly because she knows that they've had bad experiences with men. So why is she faulting Keitaro for doing the same thing? I liked this fic right up until that last scene. I do hope you update this, but if you do, you're gonna have to rewrite Haruka if you want this to be a good story.
| Shincore chapter 4 . 5/13/2016
Haruka is kind of being a cold hearted bitch...Things like drunk people are going to be a trauma for him for a long time...And that's not weird she should grow the fuck up and realise that people who have traumas don't like to see someone do something that is related to that.
| Ibskib chapter 4 . 3/16/2015
Haruka is definitely not the nurturing sort, giving that kind of ultimatum is pretty cruel.
On another note a shame that I won't get to know why Keitaro hates the cat, but I'm guessing it, or another cat, played a role in his mother's death and so it functions as a memento mori of sorts.
| dufus2000 chapter 4 . 11/18/2014
Well written story. Keep it up. To bad this story appears abandoned. This chapter was good up b to the ending bit with Haruka being a jerk. Frankly if she had pulled that on me I would have left. K needs to care for his sister. I don't care if Hina or Haruka want him to babysit a bunch of brats they want to call family. The fact is those girls are not family. as his sisters only caretaker he has to take care of her. And babysitting the others is not his problem. If I was him I'd take Kanako and move somewhere else to ensure she is safe and cared for.
| Warpwind chapter 3 . 12/22/2012
a guerrilla, not an guerrilla
| firecaster-hikaru chapter 1 . 8/21/2012
I vote for Keitaro/Motoko. Mutsumi in my eyes is not really an ideal parent due to her constant fainting and forgetfulness. She is not a bad person but Keitaro really deserves someone he can depend on and even if Motoko is a serious person, she does have an inner kindness. So far the story is really interesting and different as well.
| gster391 chapter 4 . 7/17/2012
Well. Interesting premise and a well-written story, but I don't think Haruka would react like that. In fact, thanks to her knowing about Keitaros dad, chances are higher she'd get rid of Mitsunes alcohol...that said, still a fantastic setup and a great AU rendition of LH.
| korrd chapter 4 . 3/25/2012
I like the story, but Haruka's defense of Kitsune comes across as somewhat hypocritical in light of what her and Hina were saying in previous chapters. Yes I understand that she and Hina love the girls of the Hinata-Sou, but after all the effort to get Keitaro and Kanako to the place and then threaten him due to his past experiences with alcoholics? As a person with an alcoholic sibling I can tell you that I have seen every level of what alcohol does to a person. While I love Akamatsu's work he did not portray alcoholism realistically. Its easy to do in an anime because you don't have to show all the actual effects. But when you wrote this fic you included some of what can actually happen with an alcoholic.
For Keitaro and Kanako the threat of alcohol is very real, and it is quite understandable for them to want nothing to do with it. Some people who come from homes like theirs actually require therapy just to be able to deal with alcohol being consumed around them. As manager of the inn Keitaro also has the right to make it a dry dorm. He is the manager not Haruka. As Hina placed him in charge of the place he can add new rules and the girls have to comply with them. Also if the girls are truly Hina's treasures she'd want them to be able to function in the real world, and while this also extends to Keitaro, I ask you which makes it easier to get a job. An inability to deal with alcohol or being an alcoholic? I can tell you it isn't the first from seeing my brother get fired from job after job.
Other than that it is an excellent fic, and I love the interaction between Kanako and Keitaro. But just remember, alcohol is one of the biggest destroyers of a household in the world. It destroys people the more often it is consumed. You gave it an authentic portrayal earlier. Don't stop doing that now that you've brought them to the house.
| Lord Sia chapter 4 . 2/27/2012
Brilliant. Characters and depth and... Yeah. Brilliant.
| EmD23 chapter 4 . 1/12/2012
I'm still hoping for a continuation.
| Mountainsage72 chapter 2 . 10/31/2011
Sage likes. OH, and MOTOKO, please~~!
| MrNeedsToRemoveAllFavs chapter 4 . 8/25/2011
I don't like the fact that Haruka being completely insensitive to one set of tragedies in favor of another. Even more so when she threatened to take him back to his dad-his now abusive-when-drunk dad-and then tell the person that entrusted him with the place that he went back of his own free will. And, whether or not she knows it, that would end up with him either murdering his father, being murdered by his father, or ending up on the streets with no prospects. And Granny Hina likely wouldn't be able to find him, or help him, in any case.
The scene struck me as the type of scene someone pulls off when they're pissed and they end up completely destroying their relationship with another person. Essentially, they are so angry they can't be polite or tactful and they say things that hurt other people too much for the others to forgive them for.
I doubt that's the way it is going to turn out, but that's what it struck me as.
| knightwolf20x chapter 4 . 2/28/2011
Great story. Can't wait for the next update. As for pairing, I always liked the Keitaro/Mokoto coupling.
| donewiththissite chapter 4 . 10/28/2010
I think this is a great story so far. Keitaro seems so human despite his burdens. Kanako is so cute and I love how she calls him Daddy! This Keitaro's pretty tough!
He was a bit harsh to Kitsune, but can you blame him? He just got out of a scarring situation and Kanako is terrified of drunks. They both associate drinking with negative things.
Haruka was too harsh. She seemed kind of spiteful at the end. Even if she cares for her Hinata family, it does not excuse her lack of sympathy and care towards her blood family. It was really hypocritical of her.
It'll be interesting to see how Keitaro acts.
| He Who Dreams chapter 4 . 8/15/2010
Please update soon, I love this story.