|Reviews for Primal Requiem|
| bubbajack chapter 10 . 12/27/2012
Damn Akuma, you weren't kidding that fight WAS brutal! I absolutely loved it! My favorite kill has got to be the one where Gar turned one Beastian into a live Grenade. That reminded me of something you could do in Far Cry 3 for some reason...My favorite OC hands down is Ark as there is just so much mystery going on with him. I have no clue how anyone could recognize Gar though, and part of me is glad I can't because so far I'm loving all the surprises!
| Kenju chapter 9 . 11/25/2012
…DAAAAAAANNNNNG dude, where did you get that fight scene from? I know it had to be from a movie, the detail and attention you put into the single counter attack alone tells me it had to be something you SAW, in person, NOT something you just thought up or made up. No one has an imagination THAT sharp, not that I have ever known at least. If you did come up with that entire fight on your own, my hats off to you dude.
If you DIDN’T come up with it on your own, then I have to applaud your observational skills and communication skills. It takes a lot of practice and work for an author to paint out a scene in their head and put it down on paper. Choosing the correct words and painting the mental image reflect this. It takes even MORE work and skill however to write observations in a way that doesn’t come across as stage directions for a play. Either way what you did here shows you have a real knack for fight scenes, a good thing indeed given how much action your stories usually contain.
People underestimate just how much work a fight scene is. As an editor, I can tell you and your readers just how big of a pain it is. It takes about five pages worth of text to show the same amount of action as a single page of about five panels from a comic book. This chapter here, as short as it was, is only two or maybe three comic book panels of action. It takes A LOT of work and its HARD work. You did your research and you showed it here.
I demand more combat in your future work! *makes a quick troll sign* More fight scenes! (not joking dude, its been a LONG time since I have come across someone write a good fight, and you have the skills here)
The twist at the end was a nice touch, though I have to wonder just where he got the bomb from…*scratches chin in thought*
Keep up the good work dude, PLEASE continue this fic *pulls out Beast Boy giving ‘The Face’*
| Eragon Namikaze chapter 9 . 12/9/2011
You know, I've always been intrigued by this fanfic with the whole bloodlust, new creatures, and Beast Boy having different powers. I also liked how you got in depth, but at the same time didn't reveal too much. Very good foreshadowing I think, very good.
| warprince2000 chapter 9 . 12/5/2011
Cool story! can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter (update soon Plz)(where is bb?)
| bubbajack chapter 9 . 12/5/2011
Pretty damn cool fight scene Akuma! I think even Riddick himself would be impressed with Gar's killing prowess!
| bubbajack chapter 8 . 10/12/2011
IT was AWSOME! It definatly lived up to all my expactions I think Ark my be a spy though cause I cant see Gar letting someone escape alive unless it was intentional... that being said I wonder what Gar is going to take from starfire's offer just a kiss or sumthin more... personal hehe anyway loved the chappie cant wait for the next one! Keep on Rockin' Bubbajack out!
| Beetledude chapter 8 . 9/24/2011
First let me start out by saying that I really enjoy this story so far, and particularly the remake of Beast Boy.
The premise of the story is pretty easy to follow and enticing to read, and though I at some points thought the progress seemed very, very fast-paced, it still fits together quite well. I think I'm going to enjoy Gar's interactions with both the Former Tameranians and the Teen Titans, and hopefully see how much his new outlook changes his way of relating to the world.
Regardless of how it work out, I will say that I immensely enjoy Gar's personality and hope to see much more of it in future chapters.
All in all, a great fic and I hope to see more chapters soon.
| Amenson chapter 8 . 8/9/2011
Actually a good read, if not a complicated one (a good thing). Just started reading today and all of your stuff's really good and written masterfully! Only question I have pertaining to this story is What is this prophecy? You've mentioned it a number(3 I think) of times and not a detail other than there is one. If you have it as part of the next one or many chapters, than disregard my question.
As a side note, nice touch when you introduced Galfore (an alien name always has some spelling issues, there never seems to be a single term, but that doesn't matter. Not to me anyways). That whole scene completely blindsided me and turned the entire plot on it's head in the best way possible!
And a marvelous job in regards to Garfield's post-awakened personality. Some authors get so worked up with a character having to have a reason for doing whatever it is that they do that the writing style gets sidetracked. Thanks for not doing that!
As a final thingamajig(apparently this is a word in the dictionary), I would usually recommend a particular direction to the plot, but after readig some of your other stories on here as well as the challenges you present to others, I'm sure I'll love how this will turn out(if you continue writing chapters which I do sincerely hope you will). And don't listen to the ramblings of the perfectionists who tell you how a past is supposed to be. Your version is sufficient and helpful to the story.
| Kenju chapter 8 . 7/26/2011
Alright well first we learned a bit about the backstory and history here, always a good thing when dealing with OC’s even more so when dealing with an entirely new species being added. Its also interesting that Starfire doesn’t ‘remember’ everything she learned as a child, you gave her gaps in her memory, flaws. While that makes it harder to a degree to know everything that’s going on it makes the story more realistic since it shows she doesn’t have a perfect memory and can make mistakes.
The history with X’hal, THAT was cool. We never saw her fight, just the devastation it wrought. Though I think you were off about the okaaran evolving into the tamaranean since the tamaraneans still interact with the okaaran on a regular basis. Still that’s a minor thing and part of your mythos so its up to you. Still, *whistles* X’Hal was a tough old bird wasn’t she lol, you see where some of ‘them’ get it from now and it makes you wonder what will happen later on down the road doesn’t it?
Starfire acting as a buffer between BB and the others is proving to be interesting, we’re seeing a different side of her for sure, the rarely seen warrior side. She is trying her best to make something productive of a very bad situation, having made a deal with the devil you could say for the good of her people, I see major problems in the near future when she learns a little something they find. Making a deal with a beastan is bad enough, but to go into debt with one must seem like selling ones soul, I see many tears and much grief to come.
The beastans sure do have good intel, makes you wonder how the ** they know what they know about the Titans, not even the JLA is privy to Raven’s parentage. Still I look forward to the coming battle, it looks promising. The way you described BB in his fighting form at the end of the chapter reminded me a lot of mutant Dr Smith from the Lost In Space movie from the 90’s only not carrying a bunch of eggs on his $$ and having a scorpion stinger lol.
Keep up the good job dude, you’ve done good work so far and I look forward to seeing how this turns out. Just try to…UPDATE SOONER NEXT TIME! *laughs at the pot calling the kettle black lol*
Till next time dude, Ja Ne!
| The Cretin chapter 2 . 7/19/2011
Sorry if this is late but I just now found this and I think its awesome. I read the original chap and the retool and I think the retool is better. I don't know how to discribe it, it just seems to be better structured, better woven together. Regardless of whose this is, I think you're doing great. Hope to read more tomorrow. This does very look very interesting.
P.S. PLEASE let this be a harem. Keep rockin
| josh148513 chapter 8 . 7/15/2011
| warprince2000 chapter 8 . 7/15/2011
Cool story! can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter (update soon Plz) (worth the wait)
| Hey dumbo chapter 2 . 6/26/2011
Beast Boy didn't get his powers from a disease! And he wasn't an alien either!
When he was a kid he got bitten by a greenish monkey and caught said disease. It was killing him but his parents come up with a cure by using reverse evolution. It saved him and made him green. THAT IS HOW HE GOT HIS POWERS! GET IT RIGHT!
| josh148513 chapter 7 . 3/24/2011
Great story update soon
Are there going to be any lemons soon
| Kenju chapter 7 . 2/10/2011
Well, mostly filler here but still a lot to take in. Your revealing more about the Beastans and their culture and branching out to other characters, giving the story some varience. I liked that you gave Gal'for a kill, score one for the good guys!
Raven's little part was interesting, her surprising a Beastan had me chuckling as well. The assessment was pretty accurate as well, you never really know whats going on in her mind and her motives arent always obvious.
Robin...well, he hasnt attacked BB yet so thats good lol. I have a feeling things are going to get bad fast though.
Cyborg I worry about the most, he is very powerful by human standards, but was unable to fight the Tamaranean Pretorian Guard when Blackfire tried to merry away her sister. He is the weakest and at the greatest disadvantage of the group. I hope he'll be alright.
Starfire, ouch, poor Robin is all I can say lol. Though I do wonder whats going through her mind at this point.
Might want to lay off the exotic font in the future, you dont need to underline or make bold everything just because its a different language. Typically people use regular font most of the time, italic for thoughts and bold for giants.
No real grammer or spelling issues detected, a bit boring but this chapter was supposed to be more about setting the stage for what is to come. I look foward to seeing what comes of this.
Till next time, Ja Ne.