|Reviews for The Revenge of Asahina Mikuru|
| Guest chapter 1 . 3/18
I HATE HARUHI.
| d chapter 1 . 2/5/2011
this fucking sucks you mother fucker
| XxCookiexX chapter 1 . 7/30/2010
uhhh I really like the Kyon X Yuki but why did you have to add "something not unsimilar to what nagato had in her mouth."
but it made me lol. Also it was an interesting way to get rid of haruhi but it kinda jumped from one story to another. Overall i would like to rate it a 8/10. Hope you make more.
| s1886x chapter 1 . 1/24/2010
there are roughly a million things that i could say about this story. it is mind-blowingly impressive in itself. but i am going to settle on this: nagato has a penis?
| jusef chapter 1 . 12/22/2009
I don't see any tragic scenes here, only well deserved punishment.
| Redseb chapter 1 . 12/10/2009
That was sudden! A bit exetreme but quite good overall. I fell sorry for Haruhi, Kyon and Itsuki though
| The Hidden Lostar chapter 1 . 12/6/2009
Oh my. This is your first story? Does that mean I have the opportunity to give your fan fiction history's first review? If that's the case, it would be my pleasure. First off, I have to say one thing... this is one really funny story. I have to admit, Mikuru's sudden 'you-know-what' on Haruhi was very nice. But yeah, so far I've been giving detailed opinions on every good Haruhi story I came across... I ignored the ones that I thought were sort of lame. This isn't too bad, but here comes my whole-hearted review... first, I'll go into detail on your stab on characters.
KYON: The first thing I noticed was that Kyon was missing a vital element in his story-telling style... that would be his sarcasm. You done a good job at imitating how descriptive he is of the characters, but... without the random humor that Kyon tends to throw in his narratives, something seems just a little missing.
KOIZUMI: Ha, Koizumi didn't get to say anything in his first chapter, and wow... Yuki completely screwed him over! I really don't like Koizumi, so my evil self doesn't have much sympathy for him... but still... it doesn't seem like Itsuki got screwed over efficiently enough if he 'thinks' he's guilty - that tactic of Yuki felt almost too cheap..
HARUHI: Now for Haruhi's case, it would have depended on the timeline of when this story took place on whether or not Haruhi would have violently assaulted Mikuru like that... the only backtracking evidence you gave me was that the website had been created whenever the timeframe was that Koizumi told Kyon that Mikuru could have been falsifying her attitude... though I don't know exactly when the latter happened... but let's just assume that it was fairly early. Well I had only imagined that penalties were only for Kyon, but then again... no one else ever disobeyed Haruhi's orders, so I 'guess' it's believable.. anyways, I can't help but feel what Haruhi's fate was served as a reflection of your personal feelings for her. To each their own, I guess.
MIKURU: So Mikuru is basically free at the beginning of this story, huh? Somehow I want to question how much sense it makes for Mikuru to be able to do all those things to Haruhi and preserve the timeline that was paved for the older Mikuru. Something just doesn't add up in all this... I'm starting to wonder how Haruhi lost her powers in the first place - if that will ever be explained.
YUKI: I wonder where Yuki got her emotions all of a sudden... and more importantly, where her morals went. And did I mention what Yuki did was utterly cheap? This is cheaper than anything she's done in the anime or light-novels... I mean gosh - in the Disappearance arc, she at least gave Kyon a say in the matter... now she's just being selfish... and you're telling me she has a p... never mind...
I understand this is just chapter one, but there seems to be very little evidence that you've been through all the light novels of Haruhi except for two things:
1) Your writing style seems very educated in capturing Kyon's style besides the missing sarcasm from his style.
2) You mentioned the closet which I'm not sure if the closet in the clubroom was ever addressed in the anime, but it's been a long time since I watched it so...
But anyways, this story has potential... I hope where you're going about the thing Yuki has is just to mess with people's heads... but I have the feeling it isn't. I guess what I'm saying is that to make this a timeless classic, I think an important factor is to have the story contain believable events.. and from the stories I read so far, there are plenty of ways to make even this story very believable. The approach I'd take is a little back story as to how all this had come to happen, but that's just what I'd do if I were to have such an interesting plot. At any rate, this isn't bad! I'd like to see where this story winds up in the future!