|Reviews for Carnal Knowledge 101|
| LovelyLoves chapter 2 . 8/12/2010
(oh, but the ch 1 lemon was hot (like fore no real reason))!
LMAO! this is so f*cking great! edward is such an asshole-douche bag-pretentious shit & bella is actually probably really normal & patient, but after having to deal w Cockward all day, yea, i'd want a sandwhich & for him to shut the f*ck up too! lol
| LovelyLoves chapter 1 . 8/12/2010
lol, this the deepthroat question made me snort! these two are foolish! mad ridiculousness about foreskin...
| mephis1 chapter 4 . 8/3/2010
"Bouche sans bush". Well, that had me chuckling. Where, pray tell, do you pluck these choice phrases from?
Your creation of a pedantic, pedagogic, lustful, hard-of-hearing, one-track mind, ever-ready priapic, soliloquy jiving, booty obsessed, Claire de lune loving vampire is one unforgettable creation. Virginal he is not. Hell bent on sampling and living out whatever carnal bacchanalian fantasies that his depraved mind conjures up. Surely, yes and affirmative. And I don't think I'll be ever able to think about Roudheads and Cavaliers in the same way again. Along with BMOF. I like your Bella - a veritable headstrong, 21st century woman. Thanks again for this story.
~ Udo xx
| mephis1 chapter 3 . 8/3/2010
That chapter was a blast to write wasn't it? Each chapter has you riffing on a theme, I see. This one has classical music while the ever lustful, depraved, perverted vampire focuses on being assthetic. Seems to me that when he puts his mind to it, he's one hard-working vampire who knows the benefits of thorough research. Several unforgettable scenes in here, for me at least, not least his foray into Target and his mis-begotton hearing. Or is it mis-begotton at all? I do wonder. One has him colour-blind and the other has him slightly off kilter with his hearing. I ejoyed the side-swipes against the curmudgeonly Darcy, Debussy, Claire de lune and Haydn. Thanks again for this chapter.
~ Udo xx
| mephis1 chapter 2 . 8/3/2010
Who would have thought? Not me. Foodnetwork and pedagogic, lustful vampire with a one-track mind whose thoughts seem to segue from seemingly innocent burgers and sandwiches to an entirely different level. This story reads like a risque cabaret with a vampire hell-bent on tutoring his innocent wence on the ways of his world. It certainly reads like an updated, bawdy Fanny Hill. And it definitely reads better than that viginal, mormon story whose name seems to have slipped my mind. Thanks again for writing this. I'm willing to wager that you had a lot of amusement writing this story.
~ Udo xx
| mephis1 chapter 1 . 8/3/2010
I was just about to settle down to read your latest DC chapter but somehow found myself distracted by CK101. I think I was curious and wanted to track the progress of your writing. CK101 doesn't disappoint. In fact, it's lovely to have an early sighting of your carnal, priapic, ever-tumescent vampire-man. And the humour is very much errr...erect and present. I enjoyed your riffing on cavalier, roundhead, Banner and Hulk. I never thought I'd see all those on a single page but now I have. In short, I love this chapter.
~ Udo xx
| LoveDanielsNuts chapter 4 . 8/3/2010
The text speak it fucking killing me...I dont know any of them, and what they mean is putting me in stitches from laughing!
Fucking funny as hell!
| LoveDanielsNuts chapter 3 . 8/3/2010
How the fuck can a vampire think he's hearing incorrectly...so fucking funny man...he is totally clueless.
Bella is a right snarky bitch though, to be fair, but at least she knows what she wants...LOVE IT!
| LoveDanielsNuts chapter 2 . 8/3/2010
Fur burger...G-spot...Bella mumbling under her breath about the Coq au vain...Just perfect, had me laughing and horny at the same time!
| LoveDanielsNuts chapter 1 . 8/3/2010
Dammit woman...Love this cocksure Edward, and the foreskin banter is fucking class!
| sleeptalker1 chapter 4 . 6/11/2010
wow Bella's getting bitchier by minute lol
sex in hammock ... damn those things are too difficult to sit in let alone sex!
mile high club - Edward making sure to stay away from the germs ...priceless!
| sleeptalker1 chapter 3 . 6/11/2010
Best bit? its one giant best bit!
yes it is the quiet ones lmao
| sleeptalker1 chapter 2 . 6/11/2010
Holy shit that was the funniest thing ever!
My cheeks are actually hurting from smiling & laughing so much.
Every line ... just hysterical.
| sleeptalker1 chapter 1 . 6/11/2010
flappy thing - lmao
so many fantastic lines in this one its unbelievable!
Im sure Edwards plan is to keep steeling Bellas underwear so she wont have any choice but to go shopping with Alice for some decent stuff lol
Amazing writing as always - Im heading straight for the next chapter
| an alcoholic chapter 4 . 3/31/2010
"Her ass was legally MINE, MINE, MINE!" thought Mensa!ward and nautical toilet died, died, died.