Reviews for Peacekeeper
ThePink1 at Reefside.Net chapter 4 . 10/22/2014
"Rassin, frassin nut-puckers," Cornelia seethed.
"Another Corny bites the dust!" Irma sung to the old Queen beat. Elyon whooped and mock-slugged her in the shoulder.
"Don't call her Corny, she'll just come back and haauuuunt yoouuuu!" the young Queen moaned. The others giggled around them. "So ... Cornelia ... Phobos' fiance', eh? Something you're not telling us?"
"As IF! I'll have you know I'm perfectly happy with my boyfriend Peter ..." She shut up, blushing furiously.
"Oho, so YOU're the Lia he turfed Cindy the wonder-gymnast for, huh?" Taranee cheered.
"Reviewing!" Cornelia shouted frantically, thumping her iMouse around to get the window open ...

Heh. We'll leave them to it, yellow. GREAT chapter, sorry 'bout the wait. Catch ya on the flipside, A J & friends.
Dark-Automaton chapter 4 . 9/14/2014
This story isn't too bad. I can see why that one guy posted it on TV Tropes' Fanfic Recommendations. I hope you're able to update soon.
Fast Frank chapter 3 . 1/2/2014
I really didn't like your war story: The force should be multiplied by at least ten: no one is going to send two reinforced companies to take a fortified city. Most troops break at ten percent casualties, at twenty percent casualties, even elite forces (eg Napoleon's Old Guard) WILL NOT ADVANCE. Don't cite Pickett's charge, gunpowder smoke concealed the extent of the slaughter.
Fast Frank chapter 2 . 1/2/2014
Your take on Drow alignment makes sense. TSR simply didn't think things through when they set up the racial alignments. (Actually they didn't think things through on a lot of issues.)
Fast Frank chapter 1 . 1/2/2014
Don't worry about deviating from "the standard". As long as you are internally consistent, you are within the spirit (and indeed, the letter) of the original D&D rules.
Seville chapter 2 . 6/24/2013
Nice story.
XV-Dragon chapter 4 . 4/28/2013
Awsome chapter yellow 14, though loks like things are going to get ugly soon with the murder happning, Phobos having a hidden scheme in the works and what ever Miranda is trying to cook up for possible allies.
nightmaster000 chapter 4 . 4/24/2013
Good story.
A J friends chapter 3 . 5/10/2011
W.i.t.c.h.e. was just coming in from their annual Boys-v-Girls basketball game, when they found the Astral Drops crowded around Taranee's computer, consoling Lucy and Mary-Ellen, Elyon's first 'Drop. At the sound of the others' entrance, Lucy sprang up and slapped Cornelia.

"The #&][?" Cornelia cried, looking at her duplicate's tear-streaked face.

"You SHOT Elyon!" Lucy screamed, and took off running down the hall.

"Oh, boy. I've got this," her girlfriend Carmen sighed, and went after her.

"I shot who?" Cornelia muttered, rubbing her cheek. That had stung!

"Well, you missed, but you tried to shoot ME," Mary-Ellen said, her arms around Elyon in a stranglehold of a hug. "i mean her. Us?" The newbie drop shook her head for a minute, self-confused.

"And we got this," Hay and Mei said, gently disentangling Mary-Ellen from Elyon with matching grins.

"Does SOMEbody wanna tell us what's going on?" Irma asked.

"Right here," 'Mina replied, steering her and Will over to the computer.

"'Chapter 3 of Peacekeeper'? Oh!" Will said, smiling. Hey, Taranee, you're on in three, two, one ..."

The W.i.t.c.h.e. girls all crowded around Taranee's widescreen display, reading raptly.

Shortly ...

"Well, now i know why she's mad," Cornelia sighed.

"Yeah, siding WITH Phobos? That's low even for YOU, Corny," Irma quipped.

"DON'T call me CORNY!" was her reply, with a slug to the Water Guardian's shoulder by the Earth girl.

"Now you know where Lucy gets her temper," 'Mina told Mary-Ellen, as Irma yelped.

"Come and see the violence inherent in the system," Hay and Mei both chuckled.

"Yeah, help ME, I'M the one being repressed, here," Irma whined. "Whatever happened to freedom of speech?"

"Save it for 'Lair on the Air'," her 'sister' said from the doorway. Carmen and Lucy were back, the latter looking much calmer.

"When I get ahold of Yellow for that chapter ..." Lucy and Cornelia both started to say, then met gazes, smiled, and sighed. Cornelia got up, and the two met in a hug. "Sorry, 'Sis'," Lucy said. "It just kinda got to me, ya know? 'specially with Mary here."

"Which reminds me ..." 'Mina said, turning to the twin of the Heart of Meridian and her original. "Why Mary-Ellen?"

'I just did what the rest of you did, and played with my name," Elyon said. "I'm Elyon Marie, so I just turned it around for her," she continued with a grin in her 'Drop's direction.

"Right, so ... Review time!" Hay sang, clicking the button center-screen.

To: Yellow 14

From: The Alphabet Soup Gang

"Great chapter, Yellow! Nice to see the extra details for your personal world coming out. And Phobie hiring Cornelia to ice Elyon? Just nasty, and a neat unique twist! Keep it coming, we're raring to read and review, Hay-hay and friends."

What she said, Yellow, Catch ya on the flipside, A J.
XV-Dragon chapter 3 . 5/7/2011
Conrelia is Phobos' assassin in this fic? Was not epxacting that,but given the number of spells and magic items in D&D, it might not be completly by choice (or even Corny for that matter) There is also the option of it only lookingl ike Conry was aiming at elyon, she could have been aiming for somone else and we only think she as the one shooting for Elyon)

Too many ways to really know until later, so hope you can update again soon yellow :)
Philip Gipson chapter 2 . 10/30/2010
Hi, Yellow. Sorry to keep you waiting. I think this chapter is really exciting. Will and Taranee must have a blast fighting the oppressors. And who is anyone to tell you how to write your stories? They're your stories, by George.
A J friends chapter 2 . 10/21/2010
"Yay, he continued it!" Hay Lin squealed, spinning around on her seat. She was immediately shushed by the rest of the girls as they worked on their studies around her.

"Hay-hay, what'd I tell you like, an hour ago?" Cornelia groused.

"Not to get distracted by new chapters until we were all done studying for that test of Mister Collins," Hay smiled, saluting smartly. "And I was fine, until this one popped up in my inbox while I was surfing through Wikis about the Twenties ..."

"Give her a break, Corny," Irma sighed. "We are talking about the original poster girl fo here."

"WhatEVER, Irmy," Cornelia bit out, rising to see what had Hay so distracted. The Roaring Twenties hadn't exactly roused her attention either, after all.

"I guess we could take a break ..." Taranee started, then gasped when she saw the story in question. She siezed the mouse and paged back up to restart.

"Urgh," Will sighed, coming over as well. "Let Yellow know they squashed his scene breaks," she murmured to Hay, who already had the review window opened, and was busily typing away while the others read.

"Gotcha, Willie," their Air girl said distractedly, then opened an extra tab and went in search of their fellow net-author, A J.

"Hey!" the other three girls cried, when their reading window shrank even further.

"Sorry, sorry," Hay told them distractedly, chatting as fast as she could type.

"'sup, Hay-hay?" Will asked, trying to follow both windows.

"Just something I rem from one of A J's early stories, so I'm asking," Hay replied. 'Thnx, Aje' she sent back to their net-friend, and closed the window. "Okayyyy, here," she told the others, and put the story to full-screen for them until they were done.

"Thanks, Hay," Taranee said, as she got back up from the bench they kept around for 'New Chapter Day'. "Alright, back to homework," she sighed.

"Soon as I finish this review," Hay replied, typing away again.

"Just what're you telling Yellow?" Irma asked, trying to read the fast-flowing script as her best friend typed.

"The good, the bad, and the relevant," Hay told her, and took one hand from the keyboard to hand Irma all the decent Wiki entries she'd printed for everybody. "Here, these should help," she said, and went back to typing.

To: Yellow14

From: Airguard69 (Yeah, I know, but it's the easy way to get a yin-yang sign on your moniker ;D )

"Hey, Yellow! We all liked this one, and it's a great cont. for the first chappie. Two warnings, they took out half your scene breaks, and according to all sources, the Drow follow Lolth the Spider Queen, not Sharess (Who's actually Bast, the Cat-goddess of Egypt in hiding!) Hope that helps, and A J says 'Hi,' too, Hay-hay Lyndon. (Hey, a girl can dream, can't she?)"

Yeah, Yellow, what she said ... Catch ya on the flipside, A J & friends.
XV-Dragon chapter 2 . 10/21/2010
Awsome chapter yellow! Wonder when Thersa will find out about Taranee? (assuming she is still taranee's biolgical mother that is)

As for the Drider thing, its supposed to be curse because the deformed mix between Drow and Drider, not being tunred into a true spider being but I can't say its not an intersting twist to make it a blessing in place of a curse plus it works well for Miranda. (In my case, I had use tosnm of magic to pull off why Miranda has her spider form in Shunned One)

Hope Nelo is doing okay and that he can get back soon, miss his updates :)
Heart of the Demons chapter 1 . 1/25/2010
Excellent! Your "D&D/W.I.T.C.H." story should be a lot different from XV's. I enjoyed it from start to finish. Taranee is adopted into the Vandom family, much to Thomas' chagrin. He wishes for her to be dead because he, like many people in the story, despise drows. I'll tell ya, it's hard to fight prejudice. The story should improve whenever you wanna update it.
ThePink1 at Reefside.Net chapter 1 . 1/18/2010
"Wow ..." Reeann sighed.

"I know, right?" Meiying giggled. "I wonder if that's how he's gonna upgrade all of us, or if we're each gonne be something different, like Cornelia's a dryad, or Irma's a water-genie, or ..."

"You're the annoying pixie nobody has the heart to squash," Carmen said from Lucy's - actually Cornelia's - seat in front of the computer. "Now pipe down, so we can actually review."

to: Yellow 14

from: 'M.c.r.l.m. (Nope, still spells nothin' ;D )

"Nice intro, Yellow. Hope to see what you've got planned for us others soon!" - Carmen Laira Sands (There, now I'm officially real! I signed my name on something!)

Don't mind them, Yellow. They're snarky about the whole Astral Drop thing ... still ... oops, there they go again. My bad. (Send 'em my apologies, 'Mina? Thanx) We all loved this first chapter. Catch ya on the flipside, A J.
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