Reviews for A man at last
dee chapter 1 . 10/13/2011
Sorry. Was just thinking about the review and thought some of what I wrote doesn't make much sense. That is something my high school teachers always told me. I need to organize my thoughts because just because things make sense to me doesn't mean I communicate those ideas effectively.

Let me clear some things up...First, I forgot to add Romantic readings of Hamlet on the list of origins of the Byronic hero. So, that character type existed before Byron, but the combination of Byron’s persona and what he did with it in his works is what made that character popular.

When I said I was reaching, I meant that the dates don’t fit.

Childe Harold's Pilgrimage cantos I and II were published in

1912 (The Giaour 1813). Is not really until Manfred 1817 (Manfred is a character from The Castle of Otranto) that the true Byronic hero emerges but Childe Harold and The Giaour shows aspects of that character type. Sense and Sensibility (1911) is too early for that but Austen was responding to the Romantic poets of that time. The Romantic poet was a rebel who challenged society, characterized as reckless . The point is that Willoughby is not a Romantic poet. It is just an act to impress woman, which works. He turns out to be boring and conventional marrying for money. Besides his namesake, Edward Rochester, Meyer models Edward and the beginning of Twilight on Pride and Prejudice (1914). I don't know I'm trying to make a connection between Austen, the Bronte sisters and vampires. Charlotte was commenting/responding to Austen in Jane Eyre. As I mention is Meyer's readings that you have to use in interpreting the text. Understanding the text as she sees it is very important to Meyer. She has mentioned in a number of interviews how important it is. She gets upset when, in her opinion, readers don't get Edward. One of the reasons for Midnight Sun is that besides just being a character development exercise. So it really is all about her.

I think the point I'm trying to say is this is the origins of Twilight and not vampire fiction. I believe her when she says she doesn't read vampire fiction. It shows. Still, is impossible not to know anything about them. She still chose vampires and she knew what she was doing. Would this story work with any other supernatural creature? No. As I mentioned I don't believe her story on the dream. I don't think it happened as she said she did. She did have a dream of something because sparkling like a rainbow is too trippy can only come from a dream. It serves no purpose in the narrative. She seems adamant about the sparkling so it must have come from somewhere. There is no need for Edward not to be able to be in the sunlight since there is no consistent definition of the vampire. There are as many vampires as there are cultures. Writers chose what they need in their narrative from myths and other fiction. The characteristics that tie them together is that they are undead and get their life force from the living. Vampires and sunlight was popularized in film because it looks cool. She chose vampires. It was a conscious decision.

Sorry, the whole point of this is that I don't like Carlisle. He didn't even mention Irina. What a compassionate guy. No mention of the pointless death of Irina, which was clearly a moral condemnation by Meyer. That really comes from Mayer. How can a book be about saving a life when at the same time have complete disregard for life. Irina thought she did the right thing (as far as Vampire Law goes). She saw a vampire child and taking into consideration what happened to Sasha, it is understandable that she reported the Cullens. She was "devastated" about having to report them. Where is the Cullen's devastation on her death. Which they did nothing about. Tanya even says she and her coven deserve to die for Irina's actions. Why is Renesmee's life worth more? More than Bella's human life, Irina's, the other vampires who are there as witnesses, the people the vampires killed while there, even the Volturi's? To me the Twilight series is Twilight to Eclipse.

Anyway, wont bother you again with additions to my previous reviews. Hope this isn't as annoying as Bella's commentary during her vampire research.
dee chapter 1 . 10/12/2011
I had this bookmarked because it is another Carlisle POV. This and the other Carlisle POV are the only two stories I’ve read of yours, so I have no idea how you portray Carlisle in your other fics. Was going through my bookmarks and decided to read it.

First of all, I think the reason I was a little disappointed with the other one shot was because you missed an opportunity to explore Carlisle and I just don’t like Carlisle. He is the only character in the series I don’t like. I even like the Volturi. I’ve disliked him since chapter 16 of Twilight which I read in 2005. Before I realized the type of story it was going to be, I actually got teary-eyed (don’t judge, I was sixteen at the time) when I read Bella’s description of Edward. Bella describes Edward as “boyish” and I found that incredibly sad that he is stuck looking like a boy. At that time all I wanted was to be a woman. That is before I realized, as I mentioned, that vampires are not evil in the series and vampirism is a metaphor for a higher plane of existence. Then I read Carlisle’s back story and there is no way I can read it without coming to the conclusion that Carlisle committed a horrible crime against Edward. I read the series within the context of the genre, what Stephenie Meyer wanted to say in the text based on what she has said in interviews, and the literature Meyer references (well, Meyer’s readings of those text, which I don’t really agree with. Carlisle is the only character I don’t get. In his conversation with Bella in New Moon, Carlisle, he tells her spent decades thinking of creating a companion and “after all those years of indecision, I simply acted on a whim.“ This is Carlisle: the character who is described as compassionate transformed that poor, dying boy on a “whim.“ Only because he was hot. Carlisle says, “sick as he was, he was still beautiful. There was something pure and good about his face.” As I mentioned, beauty goodness and we are supposed to read it as Carlisle saying he saw the goodness in Edward and believed that was worth saving. Still cannot ignore the fact that he did it for purely selfish reasons; he just used Elizabeth’s plea as a way to mitigate his guilt. He wanted a companion he could mold who “could really know [him].” Carlisle has shown he has no problem interacting with human-blood drinking vampires so why couldn’t he travel the world and look for a companion who is already a vampire? He admires the Volturi, so he has no problem befriending vampires who drink blood. The Denalis chose to drink animal blood and figured it out on their own. Statistically it is possible that there are others who have chosen the same. There is no reason for him change a human when he has all the time in the world to travel and meet vampires. The Denalis were able to convince Carmen and Eleazar because they wanted to change in the first place. Denalis are much better vampires than the Cullens in this regard. Carlisle changed Edward, Esme, Rosalie and Emmett, did they really have a choice in what they drink? Alice chose to drink animal blood and Jasper just wanted to be with Alice. Obviously, Carlisle did a terrible job in raising Edward since after ten years he leaves. Carlisle doesn’t deserve to call Edward his son. See I really hate Carlisle.

I don’t like that Carlisle used the word “rebellion” in your story. I know that is Meyer’s term I just don’t like that Carlisle uses it and just gave that part of Edward’s life a passing thought. As if that were not a total failure on his part as a sire. In most fantasy novels there is a character that represents the reader. He or she is an outsider to that world and how she or he sees the new world they are in is the way the reader is supposed to see it. In Lord of the Rings that character is Frodo and the rest of the hobbits, in Harry Potter it is Harry, and in Twilight it is Bella. Therefore, Bella’s reaction to Edward’s “rebellion” as “reasonable” is what the reader is supposed to think (this goes back to vampires being superior). Still, Meyer references the Parable of the Prodigal Son. It is about redemption. So, he asks for his inheritance, goes to the city and loses it all in “riotous living.” He feeds swine to make a living then decides to return as a servant because he has sinned against heaven and his father. The parable ends with the dichotomy of dead/alive and lost/found to emphasize his transformation. He came back from the dead. So, I like to think, since Edward never elaborates, that he hits rock bottom and truly repented and sees why what he did is wrong. This is really the moment he became a man. Meyer is vague. All she says is that he “saw the monster in [his] eyes. Then again, she only references the parable to describe Carlisle’s reaction. So, who really knows what Edward went through. I don’t think even Meyer knows.

As far as Edward’s personality. Edward is based on Meyer’s interpretations of Romantic and Victorian literature. Meyer mentions those texts in the series: Twilight is a combination of Pride and Prejudice, Sense and Sensibility and Jane Eyre along with fairy tales like Beauty and the Beast.; New Moon is Romeo and Juliet; and Eclipse is Wuthering Heights. Ignore Breaking Dawn because that is a completely different story. And it is safe to assume that Bella’s and Edward’s interpretations of those texts are Meyers or at least what Mayer wants the reader to see. Off topic, In both Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights, vampires are mentioned: Bertha Mason and Heathcliff are described in vampiric terms. Austen (mentions Byron’s poem “The Giaour” in Persuasion and Willoughby is basically a Byronic hero, Mr. Darcy to a much lesser extent [I know I‘m reaching]) and the Bronte sisters (all of them, even the forgotten one, Anne) are in some way commenting on the Byronic hero. The Byronic hero was based on Byron’s persona and Romantic readings of Satan in Paradise Lost (they completely ignored the irony Milton uses in his descriptions of Satan) and Gothic novels. Byron was linked with vampires in Palidori’s The Vampyre (from the same story challenge that inspired Shelley to write Frankenstein) and Byron mentions vampires (based folklore) in his poem “The Giaour.” Vampires have been a powerful metaphor since the Romantics when they became more than reanimated corpses from folklore and used in the fiction.

Also, Carlisle saying Edward was “being such a prude” doesn’t fit his character. Carlisle, you have no right criticizing Edward’s sexuality.
Corinne Tate chapter 1 . 9/24/2011
I'm really reluctant to review what my readers write. I've noticed that if I don't give them glowing praise, they quit reading mine. But since you don't have a lot of reviews I decided to risk it. I picked the one on your list with the fewest reviews of the English ones. I know it's finished for almost two years, so pardon me if I make suggestions or criticisms; I only do that in case of rewrites. I review as I read so I don't forget anything.

My first comment is site specific. It's easier to pick out author's notes if they're in bold type. Yours are fine, but some writers let them bleed into the story with no differentiation from the text.

I also don't like when writers announce who's POV we're reading, when they could do it better in the story. It saves time, but it sort of assumes that I already know the character. (don't worry, I'm not going to complain all the way through)

I like that he calls Alice and Bella his daughters even though he points out he didn't create them. I like that he notes their supernatural abilities are defensive and peaceful. When you consider those of Jane, Alec, Benjamin, and Kate it sort of makes you wonder how that happened.

I have to agree with your assessment of cannon Edward. All the worst traits of a teenager, despite being old enough to know better.

I love that you point out his arrogant idea that he loved her more than she loved him. Making the reference to "singer" again assumes we've read the original story. I'd like it better if you used his own words to describe what that would feel like to a vampire.

I'm not loving the reference to Romeo and Juliet. It's a Tragedy, not a Romance. Two teenagers who kill themselves because their families can't get past their feud, to me is not romantic, it's a sad waste. Also, it promotes the idea that a relationship is more important than your very life. All Romeo and Juliet prove, is that teenagers can be stubborn and reckless.

Carlisle referencing the tale sort of legitimizes it as something that actually happened to real people, rather than it being a fiction. Carlisle may have even been in London when Shakespeare was alive and writing plays. But the reference to Romeo and Juliet is cannon in that Bella loved the story, and Meyer compares her own story to the classic.

I'm also not ready to concede that teenagers really have a grasp of what love is all about. Too often I see it based on beauty, hotness, popularity, the clothes they wear, the music they like, the car they drive, and what their friends think of them. I know they have passion aplenty, but wisdom takes more time.

Your Edward does take a step toward maturity, not by agreeing to change her, but by realizing that he can't control other people - even if he loves them. I think Bella had a bit to learn about maturity herself with her insistence that Edward not only change her, but do it ASAP! Asking her to wait a little while was very mature on his part.

I like that your Carlisle doesn't magically know what changed Edward after the battle with Victoria. Maybe he should have asked Edward? I think in the books Edward had more of a parent/child relationship with Bella. He loved her, but like a daughter, not a lover. I think after the war with Victoria he finally decided he was "all in." He quit holding back and trying to protect her from herself. It took the very real possibility of him losing her to Jacob to do that.

I also can't understand why Carlisle, a sexually active physician vampire, couldn't conceive of pregnancy. You could have had him warn Edward of the potential, but Edward either didn't believe it could happen, or he got caught up in the moment, trying not to hurt her (biting pillows and breaking headboards) and forgot. Or vampire physiology overcame the barrier.

I like that Carlisle said Bella's devotion to her child was a lesson to both him and Edward. Sadly this is a lesson that could have failed miserably.

When Edward says goodbye to Jacob, calling him his brother and son, I can't help but feel that's exactly how your Carlisle sees Edward. I would have preferred him to call him friend rather than son, but it goes along with the whole family dynamic.

I think you've accomplished what you set out to do with this story. It's well written, and I like that Carlisle sees his "son" become a man.

My only complaints truly are not with your story, but with cannon. It might seem that I'm complaining, but it's only because your story is so dependent on the original. I'm probably not the best one to critique cannon stories.

You did a good job of giving an alternative look at Edward's progression from teenage school kid to mature father and husband. I hope I didn't offend you with my honest opinion.
Raum chapter 1 . 6/16/2011
Thanks for this beautiful insight!

I love Carlisle as a father.

"I tightened my arms around Esme, and I would have cried if I could. Here was my son, ready to fight, ready to die, but now complete, in peace with himself."

So well done!

- Raum
amymorgan chapter 1 . 12/8/2010
:} I love Carlisle's POV.
AnnaLund chapter 1 . 9/21/2010
see, I cried when I read "Goodbye Jacob, my brother... my son." already when I read BD, and now again, here in your story, I cried.

Carlisle is exonerated from his guilt finally (no, Edward doesn't have exclusive rights to guilt trips...)

and seeing him accept Jacob as a brother and son brings Carlisle to peace with himself and his actions a century ago.

There are also parts here of Carlisle's appreciation of Bella that is sorely missing in BD - she is one hell of a character, and finally I hear someone (you, through Carlisle) comment on the fact that they are all full of DEFENSIVE powers, and that Bella's is the strongest. That SHE is the strongest.

Finally I see the pride they take in her, in having her a part of the family. Heck, she IS the family.

cheers and Well Done!

anna
keyecullen chapter 1 . 7/21/2010
I enjoyed this as much as I did Epiphanies. I think your one-shots are extremely well written. I can only imagine what you wrote is exactly what Carlisle would think about Edward. And in Epiphanies, I think you have EPOV to an exact silence. It is always nice to be able to climb inside Edward's head and see what he is thinking and that is what you gave us reader's.

And so I am looking forward to reading The Unicorn in the Blue Room as well to complete your series. I did enjoy reading your profile page too.

Keye
Gleena chapter 1 . 4/4/2010
Very nice one-shot. Carlisle's reflections on Edward's slow change from a teenage mindset to a mature one was very nice. Bella should have recognized Edward wasn't completely mature -she witnessed his complete loss of control after "The Vote" at the end of New Moon. She was too in love to accept that he had weaknesses, I think. Carlisle's perspective of Edward's behavior is also tempered by love, but more objective than Bella's perceptions.

We know that SM's vampires rarely change unless something huge happens. What could be bigger than falling in love, getting married, and having a baby? Well, I suppose it is sacrificing your life (or planning to) for that child.
miaokuancha chapter 1 . 3/16/2010
- I muse on her talent, and think it is strangely fitting that my children who have powers, have mainly defensive ones: seeing the future, reading minds, throwing a powerful shield, empathizing. Yes, talents proper for peaceful people. Well, peaceful vampires, that is. -

Nice point there!

- He was very young when I changed him, and his growth ceased. Despite his real age, despite his culture, despite the ability to know every mind around him, he remained a teenager for a very long time, with the worst tracts of a sensitive one: arrogant, obstinate, often deeply unhappy. -

Yes.

I like Carlisle's perspective on each of the pivotal moments in Edward's journey. It gives much deeper meaning to the saga. Since I had hesitated to read beyond the first book, this is a gift to me. Thank you.
onePushyFox chapter 1 . 1/21/2010
This was just absolutely amazing! I can't tell you how refreshing it is to read something so deeply emotional and yet still so un-muddled by violence or sex. Very, very, well done!
philadelphic chapter 1 . 1/20/2010
That was incredibly sweet. I have no children, so I can't imagine what it's like to look at the child you've nurtured and loved and realize that you have a complete adult. Carlisle's voice brims with pride here.

Thank you
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