Reviews for The Legend of Yellow
alataya chapter 7 . 2/15/2010
I LOVE your story! I've already added it on my favorites bar and are now going to check it daily for new chapters! Please finish it!

My OCs comments-

East-LOVE it!

North-I LOVE it more!

South-. its a great story!

West-The story is magnifisent.(She is terrible at spelling big words.')

Skylar-I like the story, but I feel bad for the Shinnoh dexholders and Emerald.

Rin-The storySpecialshippingMangquestshippingPWNDAGE

Rika-Good job!-

Ferrito-Very funny an aventurous with a bit of romance too. 5/5 stars.

Afzelica-Its a good story.
alataya chapter 5 . 2/15/2010
Wah! you MIGHT NOT inclued any RedxYellow! PLEASE! Inclued at least a kiss somewhere i the fic! Please! BTW I the adventure in the story. I haven't seen many things like this! Thank u! u!
Teddiursa97 chapter 7 . 2/14/2010
Its late so soorry again if my brain isn't working. That was actually a very neat chapter. Sapphire seems pleased and Red well whats with the dreams. Gold hm why gold eyes. Maybe the fox likes the taste of gold eyes better? The pirates seemed neat. Mist is very commanding. I see zelda and naruto or the phantom z pokemon in this story. Ok I'll tell um. I completed Leopardpaw's Path and Binding Promises. But yes it seems to get better and better. A lot of mystery yay! I loves mystery. Happy Valentines Day Kari san! Keep up the good work on this story. Bye!
Teddiursa97 chapter 6 . 2/11/2010
Thanks. Some reason I'm reminded of zelda in this story. But yes very good reactions to me. Yellow owned the monsters easily in that. Arigato for a great story for Yellow. Golden eyes, that makes it a mystery in my opinion. Gosh I'm sorry this isn't that good my mind wasn't working this time. Maybe my ocs could help me real fast, I'll get um. *grabs a girl and boy* This is Teddy *points at girl* and her friend Ryan. Also yes I love mystery.

Ocs: Hello hydro-serpent san.

I actually enjoy coming home and reading your stories so bye bye till next time Kari san.
MelliniumorderArceus chapter 6 . 2/11/2010
Magic and pokemon. Interesting and creative.

You could try to put in some more sentences on the scenery, like how the winds are blowing..etc
Teddiursa97 chapter 5 . 2/4/2010
Great chapter. Yeah Red and Blue care for Yellow alot. Blue is like a sister almost to her. Red don't have to explain. But yes Mist has to show her bad side at least one time. Oh I can't wait to see the other's reactions to Yellow's sword. They might freak out when they see her use it. But yes I believe Red would act like that. Also Gold as her cousin yes he would be like that, but be annoying to her. Uh also whats some of these japanese terms like demo mean? Update soon please!
PenguinWarrior88 chapter 5 . 2/4/2010
Great Chapter! Love this fic!
JapanDreamer09 chapter 5 . 2/3/2010
hahaha. well Gold is definitely going to feel some pain. lol.

Okay, first off, I suggest you limit your use of Japanese when writing in here because some of your readers might not understand the words. I had a hard time to transit from one language to another (like demo). Things like Sensei should be okay though.

Good job with the different points of view but remember to split paragraphs when different people are talking; I notice a huge problem in the first Gold POV. I was like "... huh?" when Red interjected the "Let go".

I would also suggest a bit more scenery description because that's how I am. lol.

Finally, I noticed you wrote that you hope this chapter worked out for my taste. As flatter as I am, I don't want you to write specifically to what I want. I only suggest what can be improved from my point of view, but you don't have to follow them if you think readers won't read it. And I'm not good with first person writing so I can't say much in improvements there.

Okay, that's it from me. hope it was helpful.

thanks for the chapter.

-JapanDreamer
Unsatisfied Explosion chapter 5 . 2/3/2010
I Like this.. :D
Unsatisfied Explosion chapter 4 . 2/1/2010
I'm votin' for Gold.. haha! :D
Unsatisfied Explosion chapter 2 . 2/1/2010
I like the little talking in the beggining.. xD
Teddiursa97 chapter 4 . 1/31/2010
Yay Red and Yellow romance. I'm crazy for specialshipping its my favorite! Mist is super funny. I would love to see her get so mad she couldnt help yelling and hurting one of Yellow's friends. Gold deserves it the most to me. So far so good cant wait for the next chapter. The gold thing is just a funny idea to me. But yeah make mist get mad and do something to someone that would be funny. Wow I think this is my longest review to you but your story is so good! This is going into my favorites now. Update soon please.
PenguinWarrior88 chapter 4 . 1/31/2010
This was alot easier to read! That part with Red and Yellow before breakfast, so cute!
The One On The Outside chapter 4 . 1/31/2010
Another great chapter! As for the voting I think it should be Gold...I think it would be funny...or something. I don't really have a good reason but I still think it should be Gold.
JapanDreamer09 chapter 4 . 1/31/2010
Well now, there are definitely some improvements in your writing. Good descriptions.

Some problems that still need to be worked on. First, when using dialogue, put a new paragraph when someone new or someone else is talking. Brings less confusion as to who is talking.

Also add more paragraphs in the history story part (break it down into several parts). I get a bit tired when reading continuously with no breaks in between.

Finally, the last part is a bit confusing. A random man appeared out of nowhere and no introductions? And Yellow just goes along with it? Oh, well. I'm assuming that the explanation will be in the next chapter.

Anyways, voting... personally I don't really know, but if I had to choose, I probably go for Red since this is a RedXYellow shipping. But that sounds too cliche so if you want something surprising and unexpected, I suggest Gold since he's the one who will most likely get in trouble.

-JapanDreamer
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