|Reviews for Christmas Surprises|
| Meneldur chapter 4 . 7/12/2011
Correction Conga: Chapter 3: "So, I could peek on Esme ... quiet easily." Probably 'Quite easily', unless you know things I don't (which you probably do, but then, so do I, so all's fair).
Um. What am I supposed to say? This story, more than any of the others so far (I think) I love. because, it's so fun seeing htings from Alice's point of view, and so humorus, and excitable and stuff. And this story is simple (relatively), and it's just about family taking care of each other, and love and caring and teasing and humor and understanding. And it doesn't deal with existential issues and depression and monsters and the 'most common form of insanity' known as love.
Also, Rosalie really knows how to ruin the mood, right? I mean it was all peaches and sunshine and teasing, and then Rosalie tears into Alice and is really mean. And, well, I know it's Rosalie, and heaven forbid she should change or something, and she's got good reason to e doubtful as she points out, but it was really jarring, you know? Still, Alice's narration saved the day, keeping it somewhat light until jasper stepped in all serious, but then, we do need to be serious around Bella, don't we?
Also, Paige is awesome. Wonder what she'll think of Rosalie should she ever meet her. That would be a legendary encounter.
This is where I'm supposed to say until next time or whatever, but I've written 5 (?) reviews, and it's getting repititve, so instead, I will say that I await your responses and more updates. Because I'm getting sad seeing you haven't updated most of these stories in some time.
| Antonia23 chapter 1 . 12/1/2010
awsome story, i hope you write more of them.
i love it
| Deleted Account No Comment chapter 4 . 10/15/2010
And thus I bow.
Thank you for speaking up through Jasper's voice.
Oh and Rosalie is so so sexy when she is that angry.
I just love your Christmas surprises.
| Deleted Account No Comment chapter 3 . 10/15/2010
Hence the Christmas surprise ... number two.
I love this chapter, the interaction between Esme and Alice, and the way they talk. I like that you don't confine Alice to her sparkly personality. There is so much more to Alice.
The vision was intense, and definitely impressive. I was curious as to where Esme was taking the conversation just before the vision though. Maybe we could talk about that, if you don't mind sometimes.
| Deleted Account No Comment chapter 2 . 10/14/2010
you know it's the third time I read this piece of yours, I just can't help it, you crack me up every time.
I love this chapter because of the abbreviations. You're teaching me so many words and expressions and abbreviations when you write Alice that I feel like I am Esme and so not with it ... But it's cool, it's all good for my skillzzzzz.
The mother school ... yeah, and you know they get the look too, right? I mean even when I am on the phone with my mother I can see the look! they get the lie detector too. Phfffff, so unfair. Though I always thought it was kind of funny in a way that my mom could figure out I made myself fake notes to skip class but never that I was having sex with my high school best friend(s).
Anyway, I want an Esme ...
| Deleted Account No Comment chapter 1 . 10/14/2010
Hello there Darling,
Did I tell you how much I love Alice? I love you writing Alice too, it works very well. So I love Alice, I came to Twilight fan fiction to have some Alice/Bella time to begin with.
I know right? the Christmas thing, that's one thing that should have never been politically corrected. It's Christmas, and that's it. Really we all love Santa and the presents and the food, and the dysfunctional family gatherings. There is nothing better than Christmas.
That's a seriously long name for a girl, like a whole handful, how do they fit it on her driving licence? You know, I love your humor, you're such a smart ass, and I just revel in it. You make me smile like an idiot.
you know in France we have theses for masters, lol, they're called memoires, and then we have theses for doctors, they're called theses. The only difference is the memoires you choose your theme and the theses, you kind of get assigned to them.
I like Jasper, I like his discretion, and I agree with you he is totally misunderstood and disregarded.
Lis, if you wrote it lys it would mean lilies. Lys the royal flower of the French kings and Queens.
Thanks for the laugh Darling.
| Quantum Potato chapter 4 . 6/16/2010
This one’s a bit short (but sweet none the less). All I wanted to say was, interfering families, got to love them! (When you're not on the recieving end of course)
Oh, and “Esme had learned that Carlisle, like many men, were immune to subtle hints”? An absolute classic! :D
All the best,
| Quantum Potato chapter 3 . 6/16/2010
I think it’s safe to say you have your characters spot on again. Esme’s anger over her needless worrying and implied family controlling habits were realistic in my view. I also liked your dialogue where Alice goes into more details about the pros and cons of future seeing. It goes into more detail and is a lot more personal than most writers on the subject, it is more than the customary, and predictable, ‘gift and a curse’ juxtaposition . Thus is a perfect wind up to the actual vision she has.
The fact that Rosalie’s singer can change seems a bit, I don’t know, unlikely isn’t the right word but it’s as close to the sentiment as I can think of at the moment. It’s like messing with ‘destiny’ or ‘fate’ I suppose, but then this whole story is kind of about that in ways. But scientifically (yes, I know, this is a story about vampires, what right have I to drag science into it? It may stink of hypocrisy, but that’s the way my poor brain functions) I suppose it could happen. A slight change in the chemical makeup of Bella’s blood, which can be brought about by a variety of different factors, might be enough to change it to the perfect ‘Rosalie Singer’ recipe. Of course, under this assumption Bella can stop being Rosalie’s singer at any point as well. I might be over thinking this a bit...
All the best,
| Quantum Potato chapter 2 . 6/14/2010
So... Can I start of by saying that chapter may have left a permanent smirk on my face?
From the very first observation of Alice’s about telephone manners at the start of the chapter, to the determined opinions of Paige(who sounds too much like a good friend of mine when she’s had a few to drink) and Alice’s dry ‘vampire’ comments (“I had, not at Virginia Tech specifically, but no matter which college they came from, they all smelled delicious to me.”) there was (suppressed since people were in the house this time) laughter. So if I am left with this weird smile permanently stuck to my face, I blame you and solely you my dear ‘phfina. :)
All the best,
| Quantum Potato chapter 1 . 6/8/2010
Here goes nothing, I’m taking a plunge with a review, so please bear with me (because I’m procrastinating already?)
Anyway, it must be confessed that a resounding cheer erupted from me within reading the first few lines. (No one else was in the house at the time so I managed to get away with it without my sanity being questioned) Jibe at the idiocy of the PC Brigade? Scores points with me. Especially for an argument I have had before.
I love your use of literary technique. How you give a slap of irony followed in quick succession by a dash of understatement before returning to rambling. I know a lot of people don’t like rambling, but being a perpetual rambler myself (which you’ll no doubt be well aware of by now!) I find it is good for letting an idea have the time to fully be explored to its limits. Besides if everyone was precise and to the point imagine how boring the world would be? But I’m straying off the point again...
Another interesting thing which makes this story just that little bit more enjoyable is the way you make Alice describe Jasper. The way he is portrayed in most stories, he comes across as a decidedly two dimensional character, with his main points being to remind the reader of how ‘unnatural’ the whole thing is and is someone who is simply placed in the story to fulfil the ‘coupled up’ status of characters. However by the very mention and brief description in here you have transformed him into a person (being? entity?) in his own right. (Thus making him a 3D character?)
Right that’s enough from me for the now, but you’ll be hearing (or more accurately reading) more from me soon.
All the best,
| Avarenda chapter 4 . 2/23/2010
Finally, some good ol common sense.
| Avarenda chapter 3 . 2/23/2010
What? How can that happen after all this time?
| Avarenda chapter 2 . 2/23/2010
Wow...Paige sounds like she really has no filter at all. She seems like the pushy type, and the pushy type has ALWAYS annoyed me. Who knows, maybe I'll come to like her with time, but i can't decide if I'm looking forward to the upcoming Paige/Bella conflict or not.
Well, it probably won't be a 'conflict'. But I'm pretty sure Paige will feel threatened, and might not be very friendly toward Bella, which would only incite the wrath of the Cullens (especially Rosalie) and nobody wants THEM mad at you. Especially Rosalie. Cuz Rose can be downright scary.
| Avarenda chapter 1 . 2/23/2010
I really like how you portray Alice in this, you can totally feel her pure hyper active personality.
I can't wait to see how Esme is going to take this phone call.
| Enjorous chapter 3 . 2/7/2010
See, here's part two of my penance. If you didn't get that see my review of the fourth chapter. If you got it right away then you can ignore that last sentence, and this one now that you mention it.
Either way you can safely ignore that last paragraph and still be in good shape. Just so you know. And again, this one.
I've often seen Alice's visions as a total DEM but this, this gives me pause to alter my opinion of those little visions.
She can lose herself in the future huh. Well I guess she can't lose herself in the past.
But can she lose herself in the present? I don't know, I'm asking. Because the present is the present and you kinda have to live there, but it's not all that fun.
And believe me, I was tempted to "borrow" your idea.
And by borrow of course I mean steal, but I didn't!
I swear! Call off your hounds.
*looks around* I don't see any so I think I'm safe. Because I really didn't steal. I thought about it for a few minutes but decided against it.
And of course if I did actually use your idea of Alice's visions it would have been only with the written consent of the author.
Which is of course, you in this instance. Because like all the other chapters that is the real golden nugget amidst all the awesome hilarity that is Christmas Surprise that makes me go:
O.O "I like that. It's awesome. I need to make not of it so I can put it in my review even if that review is a week over do."
Okay, I best be signing off now, otherwise I'll ramble on some more.