Reviews for What lies Beneath
Cynical0range chapter 12 . 5/23/2013
i liked it. although it was kind of weird how dominant and manly harry became. the sudden increase in height and size was a bit off putting since i remembered that he had been carried bridal style by draco earlier. i had imagined him to be shorter and slender than draco and iono why it bothered me when you changed it. oh but i still enjoyed the story overall ;D
animeloveramy chapter 18 . 5/28/2012
ohhhhhh SO CUTE _

love it
Hepzheba chapter 18 . 2/18/2012
This was oddly sweet :) I like it that Draco is the one who sees Harry. I expected more action with Greyback and kind of hoped that Draco would be the one to finish him off Anyways, I liked reading this :)

I didn't know drabbles could also be short chapters, up until now I thought it was supposed to end when the few hundred words were written If you want to practise your drabble skills some more I'd recommend to either write for a short period of time, say five minutes, when time's up you should be finished. Or you could pick a song to write around and when the song is finished, so should you be (if you want to you can check out my story "Ten different things" and the rules about the shuffle challenge :))

Your first a/n stated that you don't have a beta and I would recommend you find someone 'cause there are some spelling mistake and the thing about Lucius that Tinuel already have written about :)

xx

Hepzy
Tinuel chapter 18 . 11/11/2010
First, I just want to point out a big red flag that your Beta should've caught for you. So throw a cookie at their head, and get it fixed ;) Because you kill Lucius in chapter 15, and then have him alive for the final chapter. And you made it big - saying how Draco and his mother left their life behind after the death of his father, and how they didn't want anything to remind of them of the past. Then for the last chapter, talk about Lucius being the hardest to convince to accept them. Sooo...make it consistent ) Please.

For the rest, you didn't do bad :) I can't really say I was MOVED by this story, or that I really felt a strong connection between the two..but overall, it was nice. It had a good plot (though it ended a little quickly and without much conflict), and plenty of fluff to please the DM/HP shippers. You SORT'VE kept true to the characters, though you made Draco a little..weaker than I favor. Though, maybe thats just me. Just because he is disappointed, I still like to see that spark or attitude that simply makes him a Malfoy. I ESPECIALLY wanted to see it return once Harry was back in life, seeing as any excuse for him to loose that spark is now gone.

So overall, tis cute. Just get that quick edit in, and you're basically good to go.

Happy writing,

Tinuel
keikey chapter 18 . 10/21/2010
Bravo ! Amazing ! I did cry reading your story ! So emotional ! I have to confess I would have appreciated more details for the bedroom activities though XD

Good work!

A sequel maybe ?
AngelHeartOfMine chapter 18 . 8/3/2010
This is really amazing! I loved it, your story really deserves much more reviews.
FictionFail chapter 18 . 7/15/2010
wonderful ending to it all. You used a plot I'd never read before, and it's sometimes hard to find that, kudos to you. Very well written.
halleberry1995 chapter 17 . 3/11/2010
in line 15 there is a spelling mistake

i assume u meant to write 'musky' scent instead of 'mucky' scent.

please update again as soon as possible.

your mind is a genuine miracle to have created such a story and i regret that so few people have read and reviewed it like me.

hats off to you !
Isolated1 chapter 18 . 2/24/2010
Aw! Great story!
Cazzylove chapter 18 . 2/20/2010
Great fic with a lovely ending _ _ _

love peace and chocolate _ _ _

Blessed Be _ _ _

Cazzy _ _ _
JustineAme chapter 18 . 2/18/2010
oh my! what a lovely story! i loved it! so sweet!
xxSnowxxAngelxx chapter 18 . 2/18/2010
Kya *fangirling majorly* Awesome story! So sweet, and there's implied smut, so s'all good.
CorrectedByLazyAntics chapter 18 . 2/18/2010
short but a totally amazingly emotional rollcoster...

plus, you have a way with words...beautifully written...i'm just sad it's over
Therandomfreak chapter 18 . 2/18/2010
I'm sorry for being absent so long, and I swear, I really AM sorry. I should have commented this fic a long while ago but I've had a busy time with school and simply haven't found time or will to write a comment. Lots of study, being up in the stable and I have also mourned the loss of my boyfriend (who was actually no more than I cactus I bought a couple of months ago). By every chapter I read I thought "Now I'll write", but I never did. And now the last chapter is up. Guess if I feel guilty.

Anyway, I really do want to comment; it pleases me to know that you get feedback on your stories and I love making people happy with letting them know that I like what they do. So, damn it, I WILL comment because I like to.

This story hasn't touched me the way that your FMA stories do, but that's probably because I'm not very much into HP fanfics. I love the books and I've read them many times; that may be why. Because I know the characters so well in Harry Potter, maybe that's why I can't drown so deep in the fanfictions.

In FMA, I haven't read the whole manga. Barely half. Perhaps that is why I love your FMA's so much; because you paint up an entirely new world and universe.

But none of this means that I haven't enjoyed this story; the plot is, just, WOW. It's special and unique, and above all, it is catchy. It's serious, eyeopening and clever.

About any smut in this story... I do really think that you are right. I can't quite explain why (weird really because I ADORE your smut writing... how perverted of me... *cough*) but it didn't feel... necessary for this plot.

This ending was just as satisfactionary as the most of your ending are; the happiness, the “Life is lovely” and all of it. Many times this can easily be overdone, but I always think that you do it just right.

As always, I could now begin chanting forever about how you writing kills me, revives me and make my entire life, but I would feel silly if I do. By this rate, you probably know how much I love, really LOVE your skills, even though I will never be able to put it in words. You ARE amazing and if you ever publish any books (which I am sure that you will) I swear that I will buy ten copies of each.

Cred to you.

(be the way, big thanks for your previous offer but I'm afraid to say that coming up with plots is NOT my strength. For some weird reason, the plot bunnies seems to have developed some kind of idea that I have rabies or something T.T But BIG thanks, it's truly an honor, and I will most certainly keep it in mind :D)

(damn... this wasn't supposed to become so long...)
Jagura chapter 18 . 2/18/2010
I love this story! Really, its brilliant but I think you made a little logical mistake. Didnt you write in a chapter that Lucius was dead? And now you say Draco might have problems convincing him of their relationship? Just so you know... Im a little perfectionist.
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