|Reviews for Last Expected|
| Myrna Maeve chapter 2 . 7/18/2012
Mike's gonna get arrested
| swathy chapter 2 . 6/22/2012
I am sorry if i sound mean but your writing makes no sense. It was a waste if time reading thus far.
| Sakura Lisel chapter 9 . 6/20/2012
Hmm.. I have a question. Why didn't the Dursley triplets have their OWN Alpla? Plus why do they have to come all the way from england and have Jake as their Alpha? Their great grandpa might have been from La Push, but they were born and raised in England and since Petunia was a wolf too, doesn't that make either her or Dudley the Alpha of the Dursley pack? Or better yet shouldn't one of the triplets themselves be starting to show signs of being an Alpha in their own right of the Dursley pack? Yet they go to travel to America and allow an outsider from another Pack become their official Alpha just because they'll be staying here for awhile until the vampire their hunting is taken care of? What about afterwards? Will the triplets be allowed to leave and return to England or are they going to be forced to stay?
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 7 . 10/27/2011
This chapter was great. I loved the kiss :) but there were spelling mistakes.
It's Victoire, not Victoria.
It's Daily Prophet, not Daily Profit.
It's Diagon Alley, not Dragon Ally.
And in the middle of your explanation, you just randomly put in:
"You can't eat those, they'll turn you into a frog," she said quickly.
"That one's old," I let out a laugh at her attempt to get me back.
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 6 . 10/19/2011
Alright, so a bunch of things were off in this chapter. Too tired to elaborate or be anything but brusque. So one other question: why do their views of each other keep changing so often? Like, first Teddy's wary, then he's confident, then he's scared, and then he's happy. And Leah is alternatingly shy and bold.
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 5 . 10/19/2011
Haha, in yo face Sam!
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 4 . 10/17/2011
Haha, Nessie's the next Harry :) with the whole Boy-Who-Lived jag. Or in this case, Girl-Who-Lived, haha :)
This has got to be the first time I've ever hated Victoire. Usually I adore Victoire/Teddy fics because they're just so cute, but now I'm Teddy/Leah all the way! Yeah!
If I may ask, who was your previous beta?
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 3 . 10/17/2011
Wow, that was incredibly thrilling.
But, you repeated a few paragraphs twice, and the whole thing seems a bit unrealistic. Why, exactly, did Mike try to kill them? Because they knew? If he was angry about that, wouldn't he have tried to kill Teddy? Or Leah, because she was protecting him?
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 2 . 10/15/2011
I noticed run-on sentences, misspelled words, and lots more. But the plotline is progressing nicely :)
| lost in a musical daydream chapter 1 . 10/15/2011
This is very interesting, but there are a few things I'd like to say.
First, in the first paragraph, you change from first person to third and then back to first again. Keep it to one perspective.
Second, your grammar skills need work.
Third, Angela isn't short with spiky black hair. That's Alice. Angela is medium build with brown hair. You might want to spell their names right, too - Anglia Webber should be Angela Weber.
| paili-chan chapter 8 . 10/14/2011
Wait, so WHO's side of the family does Dudley get his Voldemort blood from? *lol* is it from Lily and Petunia's side? And if it is, shouldn't that mean Harry has the same blood running through HIS veins as well? Or is it all from Vernon's side of the family?
| Sakura Lisel chapter 3 . 10/14/2011
I can't believe Mike's so evil to use the killing curse. And he was so nice too up until now. *lol* though I can't BELIEVE the Twilight gang. Already talking about Teddy now being a part of Leah and Seth's family just because Leah imprinted on Teddy, without consulting TEDDY about it first like the whole Leah/Teddy thing is already a done deal because of the imprint. They don't know ANYTHING about the guy. What if he was already married and/or madly in love with someone else back home? They think he'd give up his current girlfriend/wife who he's been with for YEARS, just because some mystical force decided he'd be the perfect mate for Leah? what about the girlfriend whos the daughter of one of the Weasley boys that was mentioned in the first chapter?
| ej-83 chapter 9 . 10/6/2011
Omg...omg...dudley's is a wolf!which mean harry survived becoz of the wolf gene...n voldemort has relatives in da us..i hope dat dey dun turn evil like he did..i meant like dey dun inherit da rage n craziness..
| Rachel chapter 8 . 8/14/2011
Sorry but I found this super confusing
| VampWitchCat chapter 8 . 8/11/2011
Your story is good so far. However, I keep finding sections repeated. There will be a few lines or paragraghs and then those same few lines or paragraphs right after. You should edit that. I hope to read the next chapter soon.