Reviews for Attack of the Clones: The Unauthorized Rewrite
His Majesty the Emperor chapter 8 . 7/29/2016
You can't see it right now, but I'm giving a standing ovation for this chapter right here. I love your take on Maul. He is a creature of paradox. On the one hand you give us no reason, at first, to feel anything about him except a desire that he be beaten. He is more beast than man, eschewing the trappings of civilized society for the chaos of war. But this chapter highlights the corrupt and decadent aspects of the Separatist movement, and we the readers find ourselves in agreement with Maul's assessment. Whatever the Republic's faults in this story, the Confederacy is worse, its message of liberation a sham.

One almost pities Maul during the course of his final stand against the Jedi. It may be his preferred environment, but one can't help but think he could have so much more than Palpatine's lackey. He could have achieved true fame, or even infamy, if he had been allowed something more.

And in the end his life amounted to nothing. His last stand was devoid of honor, devoid of any real meaning. He may have taken a few Jedi with him to the grave, but in the grand scheme of things he fell far short of helping to destroy the Jedi Order. In the end his enemies stood over his ruined body and left him to die alone. His enemies abandoned him, his supposed allies had discarded him. Even the Force had forsaken him.

That is just such a powerful idea. He truly, truly died alone. And that is probably the most terrifying thing I could possibly think of.

Dooku though, Dooku was the icing on the cake. The Son of Dathomir comics made a mistake, in my opinion, for not highlighting more Dooku's connection to Qui-Gon. I know that Filoni and Pablo were trying to emphasize that the Darkside destroys old relationships and makes every emotional sentiment into a purely selfish perversion, but Dooku should have made his hatred for Maul obvious. I always felt that Dooku's feelings of regret over Qui-Gon's death in AOTC was a genuine emotion on his part, and I think that was something the Canon sources could have done just a little better.

Your Dooku revels in Maul's misery. I love Dooku's gloating as he exacerbates the pain. The tone of hatred for Maul and regret at Qui-Gon's passing was just so fatherly. Dooku might be a Sith, but there still exists in your tale a faint sliver of the Jedi Master who left the Order out of principle.

Superb, simply superb.
mollachd chapter 10 . 7/17/2014
This gets better and better. I like the parallels between Leia and Anakin. There is so much grey in this story, it's brilliant! Thank you so much for writing.
Prince Azrael chapter 10 . 2/9/2014
Great follow-up to he first thigh perhaps a little too mature for Star Wars with the sex. Also was it necessary to mention Ventress' breasts everything she appeared?
Flaming Man of Iron chapter 10 . 12/18/2013
Wow... I very much like the more ambitious and conniving Padme than the pure virtuous madonna in the movies. Nice move. And again, brilliant rewrite. This utterly and completely owns what was produced.
pronker chapter 9 . 9/9/2013
I'm enjoying your rewrite very much. The plot, prose and characterizations are striking, just different enough to be interesting and alike enough to where I can picture your characters resembling the actors. jj

So Padme is Force-sensitive enough for Jedi training? Is this the first time it's come up, or did I miss something earlier?

Happy writing,

deadpoolhulk chapter 10 . 11/7/2012
that bit with our dear General Grevous was the best death scene i have had the pleasure of reading. (plus when i realised the implications of what he said i was blown away) you are an insanely tallented writter
Just a Lurker chapter 10 . 12/14/2011
Absolutely fantastic. I have always found the prequels themselves to be a bit underrated, not on the level of poor quality most place them, but I can't possibly say that your versions are not vastly superior. I'm always particularly entertained by your portrayals of the Sith (especially Dooku) and General Grievous. Your Grievous brings us back to his golden Tartakovsky age, which is much needed and a breath of fresh air, and his death scene was beautiful.

I found it extremely clever of you to have the 'Attack of the Clones' title remain appropriate, but in a completely different way from the original films. The idea that technically both the Republic and CIS are using clones in their own ways brings new meaning to the name 'Clone Wars', and the twists of Jango and Ventress both being clones legitimately caught me off guard. I'm really very excited about learning more about Jango in the next installment, an excitement that is only made possible by your willingness to *save* characters for the future, rather than have different ones pop up in each 'movie' and then quickly get the axe, as the prequel films do.

Padme and Anakin are also handled in a manner far superior. You explain why she is so willing to fall in love with a younger man (she is attracted to the Qui-Gon-ness in him), and I like how she seems not to have realized her feelings for Qui-Gon until after his death. As for Anakin, he's still full of angst, but that's okay, because again, it is all handled well, with plausibility. Though we regrettably don't get to see much of it, his relationship with Obi-Wan seems much more like the friendly, brotherly one described in the Original Trilogy (he's not all "It's all Obi-Wan's faaaauuuullt, he's holding baaaaaack, wah!").

One thing I'm a tad confused on, if you could clear this up I'd appreciate it. How long of a time span is there between the events of this story and those of your Phantom Menace rewrite? It seems to switch from 'four years ago' to 'nearly a decade' here. And, because I'm curious, how long was Anakin a student in the Jedi Academy?
DarkShura chapter 10 . 10/4/2011
Great story, you need to continue.
C. S. Tolkien chapter 10 . 8/20/2011
Is a shame that is so short, I would liked a more long story, and very good that you dont like censure, show all the bad things that come to war, I really liked this story, is a shame that was to short.

You would write a similar story about Revenge of the Sith?
Feeding-The-Wolves chapter 10 . 8/18/2011
AMAZING, as always. The way you describe battles is so intense; I usually get bored when I'm reading battle scenes, but I always really enjoy yours. I also really liked your version of Grievous' death. It was so, so much better than the way George Lucas did it. As if someone as powerful as Grievous could be killed by a couple of shots with a blaster.

Also, I love the way you've constructed the relationship between Anakin and Padme. The romantic stuff in the movies is cringe-worthy, but I think you've done a really good job with it. I think romance is always more effective when there's sex involved. But maybe that's just me. :D

Anyway, amazing chapter! Keep it up! :)
Feeding-The-Wolves chapter 9 . 8/3/2011
I just re-read both your rewrites of The Phantom Menace and Attack of the Clones, and I still can't believe how amazing they are! I'm so glad I read them again, because I was recently diagnosed with epilepsy, and since my seizures are caused by reading, I was kind of afraid to read anything for a while. But your stories have really helped me to get over my fear and start reading again. I know that sounds so stupid and cliched, but it's actually true! Thankyou so much! Please keep writing :)
astudentscribe chapter 9 . 2/28/2011
Very interesting. The portrayals of each perspective - let alone the individual characters - hold much greater depth than either the film or novelizations of the same. Both this and the earlier rewrite of the Phantom Menace provide a more realistic look at the events of the prequels while still making it -feel- like Star Wars. The only major point of contention I would note is the structural concern with switching of viewpoints without a denotation of that happening, and even that has been addressed in the most recent chapters.

I'm very much looking forward to the rest of Attack of the Clones - especially to see how things play out in setting up for (I presume) Revenge of the Sith. Excellent work thus far, can't wait for the next installment.
Imperial warlord chapter 9 . 2/26/2011
Awesome chapter.
Excelsior chapter 3 . 2/24/2011
The one problem with this fic is that it focus way too much in the less important characters, giving them the spotlight when in most cases they were underlings and overall weaker than the others. Grievous, for instance, is a main character in this and the previous fic, where in canon he was pretty much Sidious and Dooku's puppet. He was less powerful than them, and less smart, and pretty much keeps running away from every engagement. Hardly plot material if you ask me. Asajj is hugely overrated, and it's made clear when she has to face Dooku or Yoda and gets the crap beaten out of her with ease. Even Anakin in the old Clone Wars beat her as a padawan, when he got tired of her bull and went all out with her. The only thing that keeps her alive is that the Jedi are too good to kill her at once, which they should. As soon as someone goes all out, she'd done. Which brings us to Maul. Of all things in these two fics, he's the biggest disappointment. Such an interesting character which had no time 'on screen' when he was more powerful than both Grievous and Ventress. Obi Wan attacks him completely enraged in Episode 1 and gets his ass handed to him (that is, until he jumps and kills Maul in a scene that frankly didn't make any sense) Had Maul survived, things would have gone differently. I'm not saying he would have overthrowed Sidious - doesn't look likely to me - but it would have been twice as dramatic if the Obi Wan/Anakin vs Dooku fight in Episodes 2 and 3 were against Maul. In here, he's shunned as an extra, replaced with Grievous and Ventress. It's clear you like them, but you should consider than Palpatine, Dooku, Anakin, Obi Wan and Yoda are far superior and deserve more time and attention to properly elaborate the plot. We get that Grievous hates the Jedi; it's time to move on.

On the other hand, the way Dooku and Palpatine destroy the Jedi's credibility and the republic itself is so GOOD that it's sad the movies didn't go with it. The Jedi were enthroned bastards by the time of the prequel trilogy, and it baffles me how little that was elaborated upon, both in canon and fanfictions. Seeing it here it's awesome. The idea of a second sith triunvirate is quite catching, although I suspect Palpatine is - as usual - playing his apprentices and intends to get Vader as his only fellow sith. I'll have to wait and see. I'm delighted there's no Jar Jar, and that Padme's shallow 'politics' are easily outmatched by Sidious and Dooku's actually intelligent plot. Excellent job with that.

So, I'll conclude with this: less Grievous and more Dooku, Anakin and Obi Wan. Other than that, write on. Seeing this fic is sad in a way, because it shows how much better the prequel trilogy could have been.
Hadrian 23rd Earl of Richmond chapter 6 . 8/5/2010
good story
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