Reviews for A Dhampir's tale
Guest chapter 2 . 12/15/2015
You need to rewrite this story. It is rushed
Jose19 chapter 2 . 10/3/2014
It is a shame that you don't pair up Tsukune with Moka because it would be great to see both Romantically and forbidden speaking.
Jose19 chapter 1 . 10/3/2014
This is a interesting story because Dhampirs in general in Vampire society are either killed or banished because they are considered a great insult to their bloodline especially to Pureblooded Vampires so in general they are hated beyond reason from Vampires.
Oniix chapter 2 . 8/7/2013
I love the cold indifferent attitude of Tsukune its very well done. Please update soon.
yuseff jones chapter 2 . 6/15/2013
plz finish
deathbringer chapter 2 . 4/12/2012
you are amzaing
Toby860 chapter 2 . 9/9/2011
why did you stop writing. this stpry is great especially the personalitys.
Dark Plagueman chapter 2 . 1/4/2011
good chapter
Tamie123 chapter 1 . 12/16/2010
Just like vampires don’t accept dhampires because of their human heritage, I don't think that most humans would accept dhampirs due to their vampire hertiage unless they were unaware that Tsukune was a dhampir just like they were unaware that Moka was a vampire. It doesn't matter to humans whether some dhampires are monster hunters or not . There are a few humans who would accept half-breeds of races in which they fear such as dhampires, cambion, hanyou, etc., but the majority of them will not. So Tsukune shouldn't be thinking that it is elementary school so children are like that. Humans fear vampires because they suck the blood of the innocent. Those humans that Moka went to school with didn't know whether she was a vampire, and if they did they would automatically dislike her becauese of the trouble that some vampires have caused.
Hurricane Kazama chapter 2 . 10/17/2010
ehh... can you paragraph a bit more or make the speech clearer? the content is good, but the big, clustered paragraphs make it a bit hard to read... anyways, good story, and update soon 'kay?
A fan chapter 2 . 8/31/2010
This chapter is decent but not great! I like how you describe his weapons and gear but it lacks in emotion (and even lacks in "the lack of emotion" you would find in a stone cold assassin).

My opinion:

Is that you should have given less 3rd person descriptions and let Tsukune's thoughts come out. Also this Dhampir Tsukune is a little soft. He should have been a little more mysterious. You could give him fake outer personality (not like Moka which is formed because of a seal and is a real person but a fake personality of Tsukune suited for social interaction) that is cheerful but a darker true self formed by his past. (A double-faced assassin).
FM chapter 2 . 7/12/2010
This is a nice story but I think you better separate each dialogue in different paragraph, so it would be easier to read it. Some paragraph is too long, jut split it... it's actually not a big problem but people who read would find it tiring... give space between would you ;D I hope I didn't offend you. Ja ne~
MustacheMan14 chapter 2 . 7/10/2010
Alright good chapter and you explained the things Im sure ppl asked. That Moka Snaps sounds interesting and I hope you'll make it or if its already there then I go and read it anyway update and blah blah
NefCanuck chapter 2 . 6/5/2010
Interesting concept that you have going here. Having Tsukune being more than capable of taking care of himself (but obviously reluctant in how much he throws his weight around) makes for an entertaining read.

"Moka Snaps"? oh heck, that could be a barn burner esp. if it's *Outer* Moka who snaps and says to Tsukune "You, Me, Floor, NOW!" O_o
FelixEcho chapter 2 . 6/5/2010
dud eyou have to do something about your formating. it's really hard to read theses blocks of words i can't even try to read this so i don't even know how good it really is. other than that not bad.
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