|Reviews for Connecting the Dots|
| 1WiththeButterfly chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
So, this is was kinda AU before the dimensional blowing up-ing. that makes a lot of sense.
I completely agree with you on that comment though, it would make life so much simpler if kishi had held off on the "Kushina is the ikiruhcnij fo eht ibuuyk" plot point (See how I spoilered that for people who haven't read yet? Aren't I considerate P), and dealt with all this stuff about Sakura/Hinata. You'd think naruto would talk to them about it when he was in konoha that time.
Also, after reading some of SuperChocalateBear's JLU stuff, I have fallen in love with the flash (Listening to 'The ballad of Barry Allen' upwards of 50 times this week probably helped), and in here, that love increased. the flash is just awesome, and your's is incredibly so.
I like how the stuff about firearms got taken from 'Humane Studies', because it really is true. I have a pretty good theory that explains why they're not any guns in regular naruto-verse, but still have other technology, but the comparison of what happens when the two combine is always interesting.
Its a small wonder kiba hasn't been worrying where akamaru landed. Speaking of landing, was he one of the ones that spawned pretty high above the ground? Ouch. That could be a really good, if cripplingly sad, scene if written right...
Next chapter seems very suspensful, and I'm mostly looking forward to the game of chess between luthor and shikamaru. Who will win? only time will tell. I'm rooting for shika
And since we're on the topic of luthor, I laugh at the Anti-Life equation even more so than last time. Because, the description of its powers given to me by wikipedia equates to 'proves that life is meaningless, and then controls everyone. except anyone connectd to the speed force'. But the life equation is even sillier. I mean, whats it gonna do? make everyone have more free will? I'm with T on thid one.
aLSO, The Question is pretty damn awesome.
Till next Time
| vash3055 chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
what about the comment on hinata by blue devil last chapter or did it not mean anything.
| Payce D. Elui chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
Another excellent chapter! Love the portrayal of the characters, both shinobi and DC-verse. It was nice to see Neji finally loosen up a bit! Was the Sakura/Naruto reaction to Sakura’s “confession”?
Sasuke seems to finally have lost it- I’ll look forward to seeing what you’re going to do with his character. It seems that he’s at least gained the attentions of the not-so-good side of the populace, committed armed robbery of the tiniest amount of cash [enough to maybe gain the attentions of the Joker? We all know he doesn’t commit crimes exactly for the rewards it gains, no matter how “worth it” they are... he may be interested in why so little was robbed...], and possibly arm himself with guns. It made me laugh when he thought the may have had Jutsu encoded on them.
And Suigetsu made a LOVELY first impression- the League members are going to love him! It was also nice to see Karin hold on to a little loyalty despite her previous statements to spill all.
Neji and Raven? As amusing as that would be... think of the children! Haha, still it’ll be funny. Raven knows about the Kyuubi, huh? Will make for an interesting exploration in the future.
Looking forward to the next one!
| korrd chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
I agree with your comments on Kishi, I'm still waiting for the shoe to drop from Hinata's confession. Update soon.
| Nemrut chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
You pretty much nailed most shinobi and the interaction was good. i still say Lee is not an idiot who says "youth" and "if i do not do x of this I will do y of that" every time he speaks.
Liked the elemental distributions of the characters by the way.
Sasuke's scenes were enjoyable, even more so since he seems to gone completely psychopathic in that he has absolutely no qualms of killing anymore, whereas he wouldn't do that pre MS time.
The Teen Titans were flashed out rather believable too, especially liked Raven, who I hope will not end up with Neji, she totally deserves better
Great chapter again dude, can't wait for the new one. You have a great update schedule
| rookie84 chapter 10 . 6/20/2010
Wow, you promised a chapter on Sunday, and you delivered! I have to say, it's really nice to have an author update regularly.
Heh, Shikamaru and Luthor verbally fencing was nice. I was imagining their brains flexing and showing off how smart they were with what they had deduced.
The scene with the room assignments was really good attention to detail. I never really thought about it, but staying with teams makes a lot of sense. One of the reasons why I like this story so much.
"Hey, ain't nobody surprise attackin' NOBODY on this tower." Cyborg stood tall and crossed his arms. "We got cameras, sensors, alarms, and guns all OVER this thing. We'll know they're coming long before they hit this place."
Lol... has Cyborg completely forgotten that Titan's Tower was completely smashed a couple days ago in a surprise attack?
"Some personal stuff," sighed Kiba, jumping to his feet. "A really BAD mistake that's not going to just go away."
Heh... truer words never spoken. Looks like Kishimoto has forgotten all about it, though... honestly, he's superb at creating interesting characters and worlds, but his storytelling is a bit... haphazard, at best.
Lol, Suigetsu is so cheerfully psychotic, I loved his reason for why he didn't ask the Titans.
Sucks to be the Justice League... Luthor's alive and may be in possession of the ALE, the Konoha ppl reject them for the Titans, and now Batman and Question are sneaking behind their back... this is going to be fun.
I'm a bit iffy as to why the Konoha ninja should be confused by the different names the DC heroes go by. Don't the ANBU go by call signs? It's not that big a deal to have different names they are known by.
I like how you portray Neji. He knows how to handle Lee so well. And his protectiveness of Naruto when talking to Raven was pitch-perfect.
Heh, Sasuke steals money by accident. And I see that he's picked up a gun as well... since he can't speak English yet though, he's still in real trouble unless he teams up with someone. And he's STILL getting fangirls, lol...
"What, the inter-dimensional ninja from steampunk Japan isn't helpful?"
That is such a great description of the Naruto world.
Yeah, getting a beta reader was a good decision. The minor errors have all been cleaned up.
We're getting a battle next? Cool... I'd guess the opponent, but I'm terrible at guessing games, so I'll just wait and see.
| Konsu chapter 10 . 6/19/2010
Well damn, Sasuke with a gun just screams danger. Not to mention Tenten has an odd fascination with them as well. I'm looking forward to the next chapter to find out what happens.
Oh, Raven has a problem with Naruto, I wonder how that's going to develop. Just hope Neji doesn't take her words personally, or had picked up on what she said about herself and her friends.
| Velshard chapter 10 . 6/19/2010
Sorry this will be a very short review getting straight to the point.
Loved this latest chapter and do please keep up the excellent work.
And in case you have forgotten(of course you may not care) Father's Day is Tomorrow/Today.
| coolnesstebayo chapter 10 . 6/19/2010
Another sweet chapter. I loved all the different scenes, especially the Shikamaru and Luthor as well as when Suigetsu was talking, that was funny. The Titans interacting with the ninja was really cool too. Dont remember if youve mentioned Batgirl yet, but if not you could still have her in Gotham while Dick is with the Titans, as in before shes paralized. I never read anything from way back then so im not sure. But itd be cool to have her run into Sasuke in the next chapter or two
| Baron von Nobody chapter 10 . 6/19/2010
Awesome Sauce. You did great. I always look forward to your updates.
You got the tenth chapter up. This calls for a celebration (randomly brings out a lighted cake, confetti, balloons, and a banner that reads "Congrats on 10th chapter!" and starts blowing party whistles.)
Good work with the Sasuke scene, as well as Raven's apparent dislike of Naruto. As they say, a little conflict makes a good story. I was actually looking forward to seeing Shikamaru play chess, though, atleast to see his reaction to the game. Knowing him, he would compare it to Shogi.
I wonder who the Titan villian is going to be? We will just have to see. Oh, and Sugetsu is psycho... Hahahaha. And cloning Jugo, that is not going to turn out to be good.
Good work on everything, you have certainly come a long way since that first chapter so long ago. May you continue to do a job. :D
| Hyper-Blossom Z chapter 1 . 6/19/2010
| Mesonoxian chapter 10 . 6/19/2010
Shikamaru is so cute! His boredom cracks me up XDDD
| Shi no Akai Tsume chapter 1 . 6/18/2010
This story is already hilarious. Its already cool.
So Deidara's arm goes to their dimension, good job making this story plot up. It actually makes sense and its funny. I especially like the beginning where supermanwas questioning Bruce's sanity. And the ending where Superman asked that question, that had me.
You are a great author, I can see that from just the first chapter. Not many people can give an interesting chapter that gets people into the story without giving some action.
| Pyrinsomniac chapter 9 . 6/14/2010
Haha, Sakura and Wonder Woman glaring deathmatches make me giggle. And Naruto's "It's okay. You'd be surprised how often that sort of thing happens." Ain't that the truth.
Metropolis is in... Delaware? Huh. Seems a little random... for some reason I always thought it was closer to Kansas, but I guess distance doesn't matter to Superman of all people.
Ha, the Konoha nins keep looking at people reverently- Naruto and the T face guy, Hinata and Lois...
Illusionary... interesting. I've always used "illusory."
Moon's Eye Plan, bah. Tobi may be eccentric but Madara is out and out insane... I've lost so much respect for Kishimoto since Part II began.
"You don't have chakra. I can sense chakra, and you don't have it." Haha, I think Neji's a little overdefensive. Poor ole thing, he's so unhappy to be there... -snerk-
And Lee is cracking me up! I can just see him sitting there grinning at everybody, waiting for a chance to tell them all how overjoyed he is... I love Lee.
And I loved how protective the Rookies were of Naruto.
AHAHAHA, Batman finds Sai creepy too! Oh, that made me laugh out loud.
A few months of the Konoha teenagers in the world... oh, hel-lo property destruction.
"Not possible"? Wasn't Superman the one who noted how quickly Hinata found Naruto? And they actually know Sasuke- it would make sense for the JL to incorporate the ninjas into their search. Unless they don't trust them at ALL, but then it wouldn't make sense for them to release the kids. I mean, they don't really have a choice because of Lois, but still.
It's so interesting how you present the different frames of mind between the JL and the ninjas- you've done a wonderful job with that. It's something that wouldn't have even occurred to me had you not pointed it out. Neji being so suspicious of them because they don't really answer to anyone makes perfect sense now that I think about it.
I don't know that they WOULD be able to get back to Konoha on their own- it's a Sharingan technique, and Sasuke's the only one there with the eyes neccessary to do it. And I don't think Sasuke would be too disposed to take the rest of them back when he finally does figure it out.
Recon... good idea, Naruto. Aww, I guess he really has grown up.
-squeal- Aw, where's poor Akamaru? I have this image of him wandering around looking pitiful.
Isn't it spelled "resurrect?" I use instead of a dictionary now. It's wonderfully convenient.
"Because math totally works that way." I love you, Mr. Terrific.
"[...] I'm not as young as I used to be." Oh my God, is that Batman actually admitting something akin to weakness? THE SKY IS FALLING!
Hee, Flash WOULD be the one to suggest they're all in The Matrix.
Wait, Luthor has 3 ninjas? Shikamaru and TenTen and who else? And who's the mystery ninja that hijacked Kakashi's teleport and sent Naruto hurtling out of Luthor's building? Don't tell me Tobi's there playing around.
HA! Superman's real power- the Super Puppy Eyes! Not even Batman can withstand them! Aww, he's so huggable. Flash, too. A moon base... -snicker-
Sakura's clothes don't look anything like ancient Japan, though. And I'm not so sure they'd view the equipment as primitive- the Naruto world seems to have a far decreased level of technology compared to the DC universe, because they rely on chakra for a lot of things (such as healing.) But they already know people there don't have chakra, so wouldn't it be less primitive equipment and more primitive people?
Wouldn't it be "effects" of the blood? And I guess the water's acting funny because of all the additives and some pollutants, right? Hmm. Wonder what else would be affected... Yay medics!
Ha. "Oh yeah, if I get too upset, I turn into a monster." No biggie.
HAA, stalker Hinata! And ooh, "What are you?" What does Blue Devil know?
Oh, I love Starfire. She's like a puppy. A puppy that can speak in an amusing manner. I thought Robin was trapped in Tsukuyomi, though? That's definitely not minor. Did it break when Sasuke saw his own mother fall and he just slapped another genjutsu on Robin?
I love how Sakura talks about grabbing a base like we talk about grabbing something to eat. Nothing to it.
And sneaky sneaky Batman makes me laugh out loud.
Ooh, who got Juugo?
Another fascinating chapter, can't wait for your next!
| dtreex chapter 9 . 6/11/2010
I have just read your whole story, all the way from Chapter 1 till 9 and I must admit it was very hard to stop at all. I just kept on at it till I finished it and am now keen to see more updates.
I like your writing style and the way you portray the characters are very accurate. I especially like Starfire's dialogue.
The storyline is very smooth and the events flow from one to the next, everything (almost) makes sense and nothing seemed forced or rushed.
However, I must complain about the Japanese dialogue. I was very confused when Ino, Hinata, Sai(or was it Shino?) and John were squabbling among each other. Also, reading the translations after a whole chapter took something away from it. Perhaps putting and English translation directly under/after the Japanese dialogue. It would clear up any confusion and overall make things smoother.
One last thing was that I feel the power levels are unbalanced. I know you stated that there was a reason but I just think that you are favoring Batman a little too much. I know he's supposed to be crazy prepared for half of the universe's threats but if you pull out something like Chakra Depleting Serum I'm going to behead you with a butter knife. Slowly.
And so ends my review. I hope it would inspire or motivate you to write more. A lot more. :D
Perhaps you can share some of the plot with me and we could talk about over some PMs.