Reviews for Fracture
xxxHawkfrostxxx chapter 4 . 12/8/2013
U should make skyeyes kits Rowanheart so they mated in the tunnels AND u should make whiteblossoms kits Sabres and Lionpelts only helping her coz he luves Sabres sis or something
Also U should make talonkit possessed and U should make copperstar,the skyclan med and deputy all possessed
cassie2000 chapter 4 . 10/2/2011
Please ceep righting! OH and can you read my first story 'Am I forgiven?' It is under K and hurt/ comfort or romance!
mally24 chapter 4 . 1/8/2011
For some reason today I had to find your story, "Hope." I don't know why, but I wanted to read it. So, I did. I loved it even more the second time I read it today, and I was so excited to read the sequel. You see, I didn't know the sequel was out, so, I never looked. But, when I read "Hope" I had to see if it was out, and it was. Then, after I finished reading this chapter, I was devastated to learn that it hasn't been updated since February of last year, of 2010. I wish you would continue, and I will be keeping an eye out for you to see if you have published any more stories, or if this has been updated. But please, update because I really love this, just like "Hope" so I hope you will...Thank you.
Obzzezed chapter 4 . 8/22/2010
How old is this chapter, will you ever write again? I realy like your storys and if anyone reviewed to mine then I would carry on writing but I have gotten bored, hey, it is the summer holidays I dont feel like reading (I am blabbering arn't I?)
RandomChic chapter 4 . 3/24/2010
Great story! I hope you post a new chapter soon. Let me guess, they are Rowanheart's kits. I hope they are, 'cause those two cats have a great connection and it would be nice for Koisplash to have some kin. Willowfrost is an awesome name!
Leonora Lachance chapter 4 . 3/9/2010
Nice Story, I'm gonna make a guess but is Lionpelt possessed or is he just a (pardon, but) bastard?
Johnlock'd chapter 4 . 3/8/2010
Pretty good so far! :D
feirce fire chapter 4 . 2/23/2010
let me guess, the kits are rowanhearts, aren't they

good story! whens the next chapter
Unknown Soldier Shadow chapter 4 . 2/17/2010
And back to ThunderClan! :D

[‘They’re gone’.”]

Periods go on the inside of all types of quotation marks.

[My idiot brother is long dead, and her mother too.]

Comma after mother.

Well, there's no shame in not knowing how a story will end. It's kinda like an adventure, dontcha think? ;)

Anyway, good as usual. I look forward to the next chapter!

Shadow
Unknown Soldier Shadow chapter 3 . 2/17/2010
Oh, ShadowClan now? Sweet.

[piney]

Well...I dunno if this is really relevent, but "piney" means "covered in pine trees" not "covered in pine needles." I know what you mean here, but it seems like it would be more...er, accurate to say, "needle-covered ground." It's just a suggestion, though!

[The she-cat in question, a stunning, beautiful white she-cat with fur like gleaming snow, rose to her feet.]

Well, "stunning" and "beautiful" basically mean the same thing. I guess you could say, "stunningly beautiful" and get rid of a comma that way...or whatever. XD

[“Please, please Frostpaw!”]

Comma after the second please.

Well, that was...interesting. Rather sickening to come across, I would imagine. Poor Frostpaw. :(

But Willowfrost is a really kickin' name. XD

Onto the next one

Shadow
Unknown Soldier Shadow chapter 2 . 2/17/2010
Oh! I didn't know you already had it up! XD

[Every face had a smile plastered to it.]

You mean "on it"? :P

[what is there to say after a bombshell like that?]

You lapsed into present tense here.

[“You mean…the thing about my brother?”

“Yes. That. I, uh…I’ve come to believe that more.”]

Hehehe, methinks that Sandstone is not the daddy of those kits. :P

Woohoo! Onto the next chapter
silverstarfan chapter 4 . 2/16/2010
Rowanheart's kits?
Lakestorm Wright chapter 4 . 2/15/2010
Skyeyes is the mother of /Rowanheart/'s kits, isn't she? ;D
Kyosplosion chapter 2 . 2/15/2010
The heck? XD

I always thought Koipaw(splash) was a boy... T.T Oh, well... So THAT's how Longstar dies... TOO MUCH SUSPENSE! AUGH! *head explodes from suspense*
Kyosplosion chapter 1 . 2/15/2010
Aw! Longstar died? How did he die?

Skyeyes is the last cat I'd expect to have kits! XD Oh, well. They're so KAWAII!
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