|Reviews for Fight for the Lost|
| Violet Chloe Snow chapter 54 . 7/26
I like what this seems to be building towards. It always felt wrong that Shepard and co would just leave the Normandy for no reason if you'd already finished all of the loyalty missions ahead of time.
| Violet Chloe Snow chapter 27 . 7/25
I wonder about that last line actually. Did the Normandy SR-2 cost more than four billion credits?
| jaffa3 chapter 25 . 6/15
Ah the first kiss.
| AvidGamer chapter 1 . 6/13
Ah sexism, what a wonderful addition to any story. If you're here for beta males getting walked over and, in some cases, even physically abused, then this is the story for you!
| valkrus chapter 16 . 5/17
I just noticed you misspelled Noveria at the end here
| Henry chapter 1 . 3/20
What's with the constant male bashing and men getting scolded/hit by women for saying dumb stuff?
| valkrus chapter 64 . 1/30
thank you for writing this it's been very enjoyable seeing all the funny moments and daily interaction between everyone in the Normandy that the game doesn't provide (well it does but it's a 2010 video game so obviously the game creators can only do so much). Then there's the combat scene that usually involved the commander and nearly the entire squad instead of just Shepard plus 2 in the game. I also like the way you woven conversations lines among small groups like when it's about species facts or certain life facts about a crew member life such Thane talk about his disease to Shepard AND Mordin which led to the Salarian inputting his own opinion and knowledge on the subject instead of just only Shep. Obviously there's a few hiccups in your writing along the way (not that i blame you each chapter seems to to be at least 7k words except the correspondence chapters so mistakes are bound to happen) a few typos and a couple of places where you either forgot or accidentally hit the spacebar the most consistent mistake i found is the misspelling of Admiral Kahoku (according to the wiki)
I also have questions regarding the Cain in this fic. Wrex says he has 2 and give one to Shep then Shep give it to Grunt and in later missions(such as the Overlord and the suicide mission) both of them have 1 each which beg the question where did the second one on Normandy come from? I'm not sure if I miss or gloss over the detail that the Normandy replicate another Cain for themselves after scanning the one Wrex gifted the captain or did you confuse about the number Cains in the fic? Then there's the final moments of the suicide mission where Shepard drop everything he can to reach the airlock I could have sworn you wrote that he dropped his Cain too but then later you wrote Grunt have 2 when returning to Tuchanka? May want to recheck the number and origins of the M-920 if you care or alive
| valkrus chapter 59 . 1/29
there's a part where EDI says "The corridors are longer safe" I think a word is missing here
| valkrus chapter 56 . 1/29
Dawn said "I think THEY'RE four..." I think you meant THERE ARE
| valkrus chapter 51 . 1/29
the part where they are flying to the Aralei you misspelled 'OLder shuttle model' into 'ORder shuttle model'
| valkrus chapter 48 . 1/29
the part where Chakwas look at the AI core the word 'eyeing' is missing an e
| valkrus chapter 47 . 1/29
the encrypted transmission at the end says 'husk converSAtion process' I think you meant 'husk conVERsion process' instead?
| valkrus chapter 33 . 1/27
I'm disappointed that you didn't include the quarian with a tummy ache or kill with farming equipment here. Or maybe it's in the next chapter somehow
anyway your novelization is very well written save
also you still misspelled Kahoku
| valkrus chapter 29 . 1/27
I have to ask why do you put a period in 'Comms. room' why not just comms room?
| valkrus chapter 25 . 1/27
again it's Kahoku not Kohoku