|Reviews for The Last Domino|
| The Duelist's Heiress chapter 2 . 6/8/2010
That was interesting. :)
| MagnusSpark chapter 2 . 4/21/2010
Ooh I like this! I've had an idea i my head lately about Joey in a post apocalyptic type world, being all badass etc so this is fun to read.
Please keep it up! I need to read more! D
| Pfefferminztea chapter 2 . 3/31/2010
I definitely liked this chapter better than the first one.
Especially Joey saving Hirutani was very much like him - and still unexpected.
The only thing that seemed a bit ludicrous to me was Mai pausing to tell Joey how very brave and good and whatever he was, when it was clear that they were pursued by monsters.
Maybe that talk would have been more credible if it had been delivered indoors.
| Pfefferminztea chapter 1 . 3/31/2010
Im a little confused right now that youve already uploaded chapter two of this story and I wasnt even aware of chapter one. :D
Anyway, you did a good job at this, as always.
I love the idea, though I find it hard to accept that Mokuba, of all people, should have "died". (Makes sense, though, as a motivation for Seto...)
Nonetheless, I must say that I didnt enjoy this chapter as much as I enjoyed your other stories. Somehow, at least thats how it seemed to me, you put too many explanations in it. Im not sure whether this could have worked, but I think I would have enjoyed it more if you sort of told the story from Joeys viewpoint completely, explaining only what he remembers once again. The way it is now, the explanations seem to keep me from getting completely "involved" with the story.
Or maybe, if you think too many facts would have stayed unexplained if you didnt add the explanations, a flashback could have helped?
But thats just some side note, the story is fine as it is!
| dragonlady222 chapter 2 . 3/30/2010
Good chapter. I hope this helps Hirutani to change his ways and join the resistance. They need all the help they can get.
| LuckyLadybug chapter 2 . 3/30/2010
I like the concept of this. Bringing Hirutani in was an intriguing move. I would have liked to have seen more detail, admittedly, but under the circumstances of the fight I know there wouldn't have been much time for that. If you continue this, have you considered Hirutani being a recurring character? Or at least a scene where Joey tells Mai about the past? I admit I was kind of expecting to see some kind of backstory to fit the Hirutani thing into the anime verse.
I love Mai doing karate to help Joey in the fight. And the way you worked the theme in was awesome. Joey totally would try to bring the creep to safety, even after everything.
Atem's brief appearance was fun.
| Nuit Songeur chapter 1 . 2/28/2010
Please disreguard my last review. You didn't copy the story. You've obviously thought this out all on your own with only encouragement from another authoress. Sorry for the confusion and I apologize for my mistake. Please keep up the good work!
| Nuit Songeur chapter 1 . 2/28/2010
A very nice entry. Very well written and obviously has been well thought out.
It seems fine to me. The only thing I would question is the relevance to the theme. As far as "door" goes, I think it's a bit difficult to discern what door you were referring to but, I did see some references.
My co-mod of the community, Miss Squee, mentioned how it was heavily inspired by LuckLadyBug's fic and how it's almost like hers in a way- the AU, a resistence, the loss of friends, the visit to a burial ground. And that you've just changed the characters and settings up a bit. But, that was her comment. I still see the similarities but there are differences and your writing style is different from hers.
I think this is very good. I'm quite glad to see that you've entered it. Though, I might be carefuly your inspirations so you wouldn't be accused of copying in the future.
Great job! Good luck in the contest!
| The Duelist's Heiress chapter 1 . 2/23/2010
You have done it again. It sounds really believable.
I am very saddened by Mokuba being encased in a statue. It was sad enough when it happened in cannon. Having it happen again is just...mildly torturous.
Kaiba leaving the Blue Eyes was very moving.
And I am sad about everyone else that was encased in stone...Mokuba just stuck out a little more to me.
But I liked Yami Bakura's excuse; that made me smile.
I hope to see more out of this.
| dragonlady222 chapter 1 . 2/21/2010
Good chapter. I hope it is reversed when she is defeated. I'm glad Atemu and Bakura came back.
| sherabo chapter 1 . 2/17/2010
Wow, I want the movie rights to this. Its to to sad and I don't like a lot of ANgst, but this is an example of your great talent at weaving a story. The witch at first I thought it was Mai, glad its not I think Joey needs her. Joey is my favorite guy so I'm jazz he's the leader of the resist. I'm just really excited to see where you are going. The scene is so vivual in my mind. Hey happy New year. Subject is cool.
| MythCreatorWriter chapter 1 . 2/16/2010
My God a crossover that actually works. Everything that happens in this story makes sense for the character. I really don't like this sorceress, she freaking hurt Mokuba and therefore hurt Kaiba. You don't do that. I had a little fangirl flap moment when Link was mentioned. Is this going to be a series or something? Cause I'm dying to know how they defeat this B.
| LuckyLadybug chapter 1 . 2/16/2010
Oh, I love it. ;_; The descriptions of the resistance, and of each fatality's story, are all so poignant. But I think by far, my favorite part is Atem saying that he will follow Yugi this time. It's a very powerful line.
Not knowing what has happened to Solomon for five years is so horrible! **wonders indeed what has happened to him.**
Yami Bakura and Oreo gnawing on chicken LOL. I love the mention of him being worried for Bakura. **snarks at his cover reason for being involved.**
The mention of the new sky, and the whole cemetery scene, are so sad. Veran being so cruel as to send Mokuba back to Seto in his stone state, and Joey right next to Tristan before Tristan runs forward, particularly stand out to me. That will definitely always haunt Joey. And of course, Seto leaving a Blue Eyes White Dragon. That, more than anything else he could leave, shows the depths of his grief.
Having Mai show up was a good twist. It adds a bit of hope to the desolate scene.
The end is a well-done contrast, showing the sirens go off as someone as discovered, and the concern that someday it could be the resistance they're sounding for.