|Reviews for Elements of Deception|
| Twinnie chapter 36 . 11/26/2014
An amazing fic, that is even better than some of the EU novels!
You did a very good job here, with a coherent (and addictive) plot; a good writing; and an interesting, well-developped, new civilisation.
Howver, your work is not flawless, so if you don't mind some criticism...
There are not quite enough Vader scenes. At least, not when he is listed as one of the main characters. Same thing with Luke, who spends half of his scenes injured and not doing much of anything. Wedge is more important a character than these two... He should be listed...
My main regret is that there are some unnecessary lengths, notably during some of the Diazez scenes; despite these, you don't answer that question: how far are they willing to go to keep the Empire's trust? This is the part I wish had been developped; I don't care about Jenniiya's past or present love life.
Palpatine's last scene with Organa is chilling... You should consider writing a background scene or two, and repost it as a stand-alone... It deserves some visibility, it's so good!
Thanks for this fic, I enjoyed reading it!
| Bazz chapter 36 . 9/24/2013
This is such a fantastic fic! I'm so happy I stumbled across it. I always crave long, rebellion era stories and this has everything I love about Star Wars. Vader, intrigue, star battles, Luke as a pilot and Leia being bad-ass, great writing, and great plot! I was holding my breath at the end. Thank you for writing this and sharing it. I'm in awe of your word-count. :)
| becgate chapter 31 . 4/29/2013
Wonderful story! !
| becgate chapter 22 . 4/27/2013
There is a lot to keep up with. But this is a wonderfully written story.! !
| becgate chapter 5 . 4/26/2013
I love this story! ! It's wonderful! !
| F-Riviera chapter 1 . 1/19/2013
Absolutely LOVED it! Found this story 3 days ago, and have then spend almost every free time reading :-) Just love stories involving Wedge and Luke friendship, and hope to see more stories like this from you! Thank you so much for posting :-)
| Treenahasthaal chapter 36 . 12/25/2012
You realise of course that you can't really leave it there. We still have to sort out Bail Organa. .. and what happens next with him. :)
| Treenahasthaal chapter 35 . 12/20/2012
Great to see this back and continuing... I hope Wedge gets a chance to get better before his next outing... : )
| Treenahasthaal chapter 34 . 9/9/2012
How exciting! : )
| Linkandzel chapter 32 . 2/7/2012
now all the rebels need to do is get bail out and they can sit back and laugh it up while the empire flails around like a headless chicken.
At least that will be somthing until they can get there men un brainwiped.
| Treenahasthaal chapter 31 . 1/25/2012
Okay... so They get Wedge out, right? But then Lke gets caught when Daddy turns up, right?
*Sigh* well I can always dream...
Again fabulously flawlwss writing and a very compelling read! : )
| Macceh chapter 29 . 1/9/2012
I'm really enjoying this story, the characterisation is very good and the plot is interesting and intricate. Unfotunatly, sometimes its a little difficult to keep a track of the plot especially between updates, a short summary of what has happened previously at the start of each new chapter might help with this problem.
| Irene Sharda chapter 15 . 1/8/2012
I love the tension in this chapter and how everything fell apart so fast. However, I do pose a question: Why didn't Vader, knowing he was short on time, simply rip the information from Yolan's head? Sure the man might be a vegetable, but I doubt he would have let that get between him and finding his son? It was just something I wanted to know. It would have been easier, and wouldn't have had to back out of his agreement with the Cartel which causes so many problems later on.
| Irene Sharda chapter 29 . 1/8/2012
This is a very interesting story with many twists and turns. Though at times I think that you have too many storylines involved, I think that you weaved them together well. I love Luke and Vader as usual and I actually want Vader to succeed, at least to the point of him capturing Luke.
The Gehndarrians and their Cartel are sort of hit and miss with me, I like the leader and her second in command and her secretary, but I could do without the rest of the council. I think they the Cartel has served their purpose and can be taken out the story now. It has to do with that whole "too many storylines" I mentioned earlier. I mean you have Palpatine and Vader, Skywalker and his squad, the Rebel Alliance higher ups, Antilles and his mental anguish, Antilles and the ISB agent girl, The Manwah and her people, that's a lot of points of view to contend with.
I really enjoyed the scenes with Castll (the ISB girl) -who is an excellent character by the way- and Antilles. I love how she tortures him and gets under his skin and into his soul. I hope to see a lot more scenes with her torture techniques with Bail. As of this point it looks like the Alliance has the upper hand, and I hope it doesn't stay that way. I enjoy the close battles and when the Empire has the upper hand.
Sometimes I just like the Empire better than the Alliance. *shrugs*
It's a personal desire, but I hope to see more Luke and/or Vader scenes. I see more of all the other characters than our main ones and while good, I really didn't come to this story to see them. The potential is there, but I think there as too many unnecessary scenes that don't move the story. Especially the scenes within the Alliance. I really don't need to see every meeting between every general in the Rebel alliance. I would rather see more of Vader's plot or Castll's interrogations.
This is just some constructive criticism and I look forward to reading more of your work.
| Treenahasthaal chapter 28 . 12/20/2011
Flawless and fabulous!