|Reviews for Naruto's Kit 2|
| Hektols chapter 2 . 3/20/2013
It is not very usual to see a fic where Naruto is married to Hinata and none of their children has the Byakugan.
| Hektols chapter 1 . 3/20/2013
Edit the notes at the end of the first chapter, Hinata and Sakura can't be the second and third in the chain of comand if they just have chuunin rank, make them jonins.
| SmilingJack65 chapter 42 . 3/16/2013
I don't know why this never happened before, but when I was reading the part where you were explaining the Nara's jutsu, I just had an image pop in my head. It was in the event that Shikamaru could possess multiple people at once with his jutsu. I then just thought it would be hilarious if, for whatever reason, he forced them to enact the Thriller dance with him. It just won't go away.
| RandGuyom chapter 33 . 3/13/2013
Just wandering, but is there difference between twighlight style and the Nara clan tequniques ?
| RandGuyom chapter 29 . 3/13/2013
If ALL of Sayo's body fluids are lethal, does that mean she'll kill anyone she has unprotected sex with?
| 61394 chapter 44 . 3/7/2013
you got to be kidding me with that
| RasenganFin chapter 44 . 3/7/2013
I say Akane should vanish and reappear behind Isato then karate chop him behind the neck making him fall to his hands and knees. Shiba then comes in and slashes his back, not severing spinal muscles but causing such intense pain that he blacks out.
| Shang chapter 21 . 2/19/2013
To be honest, I'm very unhappy with how the Hyuuga issue was resolved.
Don't get me wrong - I'm generally against the idea myself, but the way you did it made Hyuuga look like complete idiots and Naruto being a biasful leader who takes one side and is entirely NOT interested in the stand of the other (Sasuke is an extreme case, but the way you presented his trial nearly mirrors how you handled Main Family stand).
Let me start with what I find as a great flaw in the resolve - REMOVING the already existing Caged Bird Seals; now, in the manga, I don't recall any indication that doing something like this is possible... it literally scraps any meaning behind having the seal in the first place - if there is a way to remove it, foreign shinobi might learn how to do it and remove the seal BEFORE killing their Hyuuga captive, thus learning Byakugan's secret. That makes the seal completely useless as means of defending the kekkai genkai.
Now, I'm not siding with the Main Family, but you very literally disregarded any justification they had for impling the Caged Bird Seal in the first place (I'm not arguing about this new one, since that is your idea); there is a purpose to the seal, some of which are more or less valid:
Starting with division into two Families, it is kinda like you said - it establishes a chain of command. Know that real military doesn't work as they present it in the movies or manga; the commander is usually the one whose life is the top priority. If someone has to survive the battle or avoid capture, it's the commander as he/she knows most of their army's goals and tactics; a commander being prisoner of the enemy can be devastating for an entire war. To that end, simple "foot soldiers" (the equivalent of Branch Family in this case) are expected to even sacrifice their lives for the sake of keeping the general free and alive. This makes perfect sense why only Branch Family is branded the seal - their death doesn't help the enemy any and, if need be, the commander (Main Family) can even force the "foot soldiers" to do their part. If everyone had Caged Bird Seals, there really is no guarantee there wouldn't be a revolt, coz the Main Family would have no means to take actual command over their 'forces".
Where the division for Main and Branch Family comes from? Well, it's not that different from medival dynasties which always favored first-borns, them being the ones assign succession of their fathers as leaders (sure, I have no idea why Hanabi wasn't branded with the seal in that regard, since Hizashi was, but that's a separate matter). There is no, real indication how modern "Naruto" world is and how much it takes from the old ages, so a monarchy within the clan is not that far-fetched.
Considering other clans having a normal chain of command without the seal - frankly, clans such as Nara, Akimichi or Inuzuka have no right to speak in the matter, coz neither of them actually have a bloodline limit; their abilities are simply "clan skills", ones that can be learned outside their bloodline (or copied by Sharingan, for example)... Nara manipulation of shadows can be 'stolen' by anyone... anyone with the right physique can copy Akimichi Baika no Jutsu... even Aburame skills can be implemented into others. Byakugan is a different matter - it can only be granted by blood or surgery. It's a unique and quite useful skill, not easily acquired outside of the Hyuuga (no doubt, in no small part, thanks to teh Caged Bird Seal). While it is true that Uchiha didn't use such methods, a clan has a right to decide how they wish to distribute their, unique abilities.
I'm not sure if I'm not forgetting some aspects of the Caged Bird Seal, but all I've written above should not be disregarded just because someone feels the seal is "bad". In placing judgment, you need to be objective and take into consideration arguments of BOTH sides, not just one. Disregarding the younger age is acceptable, but the way Naruto handled abolishing the seal completely, in my opinion, makes him a VERY bad leader who, like Hisuke said, abuses his power.
On a plus side - kudos on actually making Hisuke's comeback... thought he was just a one-shot character.
| Shang chapter 20 . 2/19/2013
Okay, you seem to be on a roll here, coz this was a pretty good chapter also; I kinda dislike the fact that you just blur out the abilities of Kioshi and Yoshimaru like that in stead of surprising us later (like Kishimoto did with some rookies, such as Shino or Kankuro in particular), but the Hyuuga plot is intriguing and the ending of the chapter is a decent premonition.
This "Majesty" fellow smells of Juubi, but how can that be with all Bijuu in tact?
And I see what you meant with Gai's team... but how could Gai "train with Lee" to forget of the ordeal, when Lee was in Land of Demons at the time? This is a plothole and quite annoying at that, since the mission arc in which Lee took part basically ended just a chapter back. You gotta pay attention to these things; I understand you put in a lot of characters into this story (by my calculations, the more stand-out ones reach up to 100 people or so... counting "Naruto's Kit"), but you must keep track of them, otherwise you may end-up ridding the story of any sense.
| Shang chapter 19 . 2/19/2013
Hmmm... well, the whole "date" idea seemed kinda forced, but all-in-all it's acceptable... time will tell how this part of the story progresses. Thus far NoburoxAkane feel a tad weird, but I suppose it makes more sense then pairing Akane with anyone else (on that note - I come up with something regarding her and "you-know-who" you might be interested in).
I'd say that this is one of the better chapters so far (kinda ironic, considering our PMs ;P), though a mission did seemed slightly rushed. Then again, I'm most anxious about Chuunin Exams to see the abilities of all the gennin, coz Akane, Noburo and Ichinoshikyo are known from part I, so they're less fun to discover then enigmas such as Sayo, Masa and the rest.
| Shang chapter 18 . 2/19/2013
I am curious over that cousin as well - who the heck did Akane mean, coz I can't really think of anyone that would fit the description.
About the whole chapter I have mixed feelings; on one hand it was an interesting way to reveal Akane's secret to the duo... on the other it seemed to go waaaaay too smoothly; I can swallow Noburo, he knew Akane for a long time, but it didn't really feel like her and Ichinoshikyo interacted much and he doesn't strike me as a calm and laid-back type that shouldn't care over something like this (personality-wise, he seems most similar to Chouji).
The whole scene wasn't bad, mind you, just... I think you could've given it more; on some level, it feels a tad like Sai's death in part I.
| Shang chapter 17 . 2/19/2013
Actually, Momo's logic is entirely flawed - be it professionals or amatuers, interrogation will hurt, the difference being that amatuers can impose lasting damage... which, in her case, hardly gives her a reason to care, since she'll be spending all of her days in jail at best (considering how Naruto acts, he's basing his decisions on personal feelings, so Momo trying to kidnap his daughter instantly provides her with a one-way ticket to a dungeon, pure and simple).
And mental damage is much more frightening then physical one; anyone subdue to both will tell you this much. True, people don't wish to get hurt, but Momo is a shinobi; she should show some resilence to things like broken bones.
On a plus side I generally like the water-walking scene... didn't specifically made me laugh, but it was fun to read.
| Shang chapter 16 . 2/19/2013
Finallz, I was about to ask where Lee was... I do give you points for remembering he was there.
Though, seriously, ANOTHER headbutt? I know Naruto is supposed to have thick skull, but this is just pushing it.
On a plus side this part of the showdown was much more enjoyable then the previous; maybe nothing grand, but at least most characters did something... I am warry over your treatment of Konoha in general; while I aplaud the view (they are a shinobi village after all), the Leaf was always described as "gentle" and whatnot, while you have them execute half the people you don't like (Danzou, Sasuke, now Haiyou)... doesn't really feel like a Konoha-thing to do.
| Shang chapter 15 . 2/17/2013
And, again, Akane just seems overpowered - she moves faster then Haiyou can act (MUCH faster, I might add) and within a minute after she appear, she knocked out a jounin that Hinata, Sakura and Hanabi combined couldn't... this is quite discouraging, really, taking any edge off IMO.
Note that Naruto AND Sasuke couldn't do anything against Zabuza and even after learning Rasengan, Naruto had quite a bit of trouble to do actual damage to Kabuto. If you make jounin go down this easily against Akane, then it really won't bring any excitment into her fights, coz she has just too much power at her disposal.
And, btw, note that in the manga Naruto never used his clones as means to shield himself; they were used to attack in dangerous situations, yes, but never used on strictly suicide acts. Such usage of Kage Bunshin seems very anti-climax.
Plus - an elemental technique that bounces? Skipping the fact that we're talking about a Raiton that bounces off a tree - a non-conductor which should absorbed it harmlessly.
I am curious about that special clay Haiyou is about to use, but being perfectly honest I'm rather disappointed in this showdown overall, sorry.
| Shang chapter 14 . 2/17/2013
Frankly, I find Momo's logic flawed - if Haiyou was supposed to be support, then it's preciously his role to hold off the enemy while she escaped with the baby. That's how this works.
The battles still seem somewhat dry and I think you could've done more with Haiyou then just have him do animal figures with his clay. I am curious about Momo though and what she'll show.