|Reviews for Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality|
| Tula Chan chapter 19 . 6/29
One minute, you're taking apart the twisted things from the original, and the next you return something even more twisted. Interesting choice of writing to say the least.
| deathless.smile chapter 19 . 6/14
You are amazing. Professor Quirrell is badass and amazing and cool and everything he should be. :D
| Anonymous chapter 19 . 6/7
Oh my god. Chapter 19 is just...wow. Your a really good author. But I don't know what to think of Quirrel though...Evil or good? What are his motives? Is he Voldemort's slave like in the Sorcerer's Stone? Or is he a good guy just honestly is trying to help Harry? I guess I'll have to keep reading to find out. :)
| Lanky Nathan chapter 19 . 6/7
THAT WAS FANTASTIC *epic amounts of fangirling*
Hot damn Professor Quirrell is incredible here!
| Guest chapter 19 . 5/31
That was so cheesy but it was so satisfying at the same time.
| PA chapter 19 . 5/17
Oh god, that was a hard read. Cringe-worthy. Damn.
| Concolor44 chapter 19 . 3/28
I honestly don't know how to express my amazement, my ... gratification, I suppose ... at Harry's achievement. And Prof. Quirrell! Holy cow. They need to clone him.
| Village-Mystic chapter 19 . 3/21
He doesn't have his wand and bag back yet? Perhaps that's the hidden Slytherin thing going on. Meanwhile regarding future Wizarding society Harry has done something Hufflepuff with house unity and fairness, that will be good to him in the future in such a small society. This Draco friendship and cross manipulation thing is one of the gems of this story. It's giving Draco a second chance - but it is requiring work on both sides.
| Hippothestrowl chapter 19 . 3/21
Good writing. Powerful characterisation. Intriguing. Emotional. Immersive.
| hisnhers chapter 19 . 3/15
Learning how to lose gracefully is important... as a mom I have problems with this manner of teaching how to lose. Your point(s) however are understood.
| 4everfictional chapter 19 . 3/13
Wow, I think everyone could benefit from learning that lesson at some point in their lives.
| Emanon chapter 19 . 3/1
My God, do I hate you, for making me like characters that I've hated my whole life. You'll probably make me hate them again even more for their betrayals later on. Dick.
| L chapter 19 . 2/28
This is my... third? Fourth? time reading this story. (SPOILER ALERT! Well, more like hint alert...)
I just noticed that Harry (presumably) left behind his pouch and wand on Quirrell's desk while he went to recuperate in the back room. I don't know if this is ever significant - Quirrell was pretty busy teaching a class at the time, though that might not have stopped him from performing some basic preliminary shenanigan that first years wouldn't notice - but I will keep my eyes peeled on this read through.
| catspaw439 chapter 19 . 2/21
Just wanted to know that I have found this story mildly interesting up to this point. I can't read anymore though. This chapter was atrocious. I totally disagree with the the supposed points made in this chapter. Awesome story otherwise.
| The Truth of Words chapter 19 . 2/1
He should have brought a gun. Magic in the Harry Potter world is only able to disrupt electrical objects, as a gun is purely mechanical along with several of the newer types being able to shoot bullets that can volacitate up to 675 miles per hour not including specialized bullets there is no person or creature with magic whom could not be killed.
| TheButterflyComposer chapter 19 . 12/24/2014
Not all the great martial artists are in Asia, as a simple Wikipedia search will tell you...though that might have been a joke on your part.
This lesson is one of the most important ones you might learn, and also the most dangerous. Giving up and losing is hardly ever an actual good idea, particularly in real life. Even when it seems prudent, a lot has been done in the name of absolute defiance.
That too, should be taught in this class.
| James chapter 19 . 12/22/2014
There are a few small errors in this chapter that many martial artists will find slightly grating. I like very much your description of the fight, since it ends in a very realistic fashion, but I was concerned with points in the dialogue. My criticism rests on the assumption that Quirrell is meant to be seen as very knowledgeable about martial arts; if he is supposed to be a little confused, as are even most real martial artists, then ignore what follows.
My first concern is over Quirrell describing all the greatest martial artists as living in Asia. This might reasonably be interpreted as a joke alluding to the prevelance of this misconception, but deliberately misrepresenting anything about combat seems out of character for Quirrell. As a result it comes off as though he wasn't smart enough to notice that wrestling, for example, is no less, useful, or ancient of a martial art than karate just because it doesn't make as good of a movie. Quirrell, with his emphasis on combat effectiveness, would no doubt consider the best martial artists to be the ones most capable of winning fights and of training winning fighters, and would have noticed that these people are spread around the world and do not in general conform to the Asian hermit Mr. Miyagi / Pai Mei stereotype.
Later. Goyle asks which level Quirrell is at, and Quirell responds "sixth dan" and commends the correctness of the question, which I found distressing for a couple of reasons (although Goyle's question was definitely correct).
Replying you are a "sixth dan" is no more useful than assuring someone you are an experienced surgeon when what they *really* need to know is that you are an experienced *heart* surgeon, if you've already started operating on their brain. "Sixth dan" does not tell anyone how many dan levels there are in your martial art: many use ten, but it seems some use five or some other arbitrary amount, and many martial arts (including e.g. Muay Thai, not only western ones) do not have such a system in place at all. It doesn't tell you how far towards mastery that level is considered to be in that specific martial art.
There is also the fact that a dan level does not always represent fighting ability. There are martial arts (such as Judo) wherein higher dan rankings are awarded primarily for being a continuously involved and helpful member of the community; a sixth dan might be an out-of-shape older individual who is not nearly as robust as they were at first dan, if that had been height of their competitive career. You can even find 6th dans in Judo, which I will hasten to add is an excellent and effective martial art in general, but you can find 6th dans in Judo who literally purchased every rank they own and could not defeat a competitive brown belt from a typical gym. Quirrell would know this.
Lastly, Quirrell, were he knowledgeable about martial arts, would know that there are schools - entire arts, even - where a dan ranking is supposed to represent fighting ability, yet actually means nothing because the art is useless, or the instruction is, or both. Quirrell would know this, having so little respect for magical dueling, the flaws in which he would readily see in various martial arts. (As I side note, I think it is fairly contradictory to condemn magical dueling with rules and yet be able to see the advantage in practicing dueling with the much stricter rules of Muggle martial arts, but let's assume that magical dueling is actually done with a ruleset that is unrealistic without good reason.)
Quirrell's answer, if he were trying to demonstrate the level of knowledge actually required to safely compare two fighters' abilities, should have been along the lines of, "I am a sixth dan in specific_martial_art, under someone. I know you, Goyle, to hold the rank of something in something from an_instructor_whose_reputation_Quirrell_knows. Furthermore, as a seperate piece of information from what I have already mentioned, I know about your competition record and have enough knowledge of the level at which you competed, not to mention competition experience of my own under similar (or sufficiently-limited) rules, to be confident that you can spar aggressively with me without fear that either of us will be hurt, even though this does not, of course, necessarily imply that I could spar with maximum aggression against you without either of us being hurt, since two people are rarely evenly matched enough for that to go both ways."
Perhaps a tad more laconic.
I did very much like the focus on learning to lose, which is a very real part of martial arts that holds many people back, although I would instead describe it as learning to see being defeated in training as simply training, and not loss at all.
| Guest chapter 19 . 11/25/2014
I firstly must say i fully and completely adore this fic! But in this chapter, i really reallt dissagree with the way you glorify "learning to lose" as you call it. Of course, that is an important lesson, but not one to be leartin such an utterlt humiliating way, not at such a young age and not by a bunch of brutes that think they are doing the right thing and enjoy hurting defenceless kids! This is what you make seam like the best thing ever. Im actually quite dissapointed
| N. E. Person chapter 19 . 11/10/2014
Wow... That sounds horrible. XP I might actually pity Dark Lord Harry. ;)
| Sensei200 chapter 19 . 10/25/2014
This chapter taught me a valuable lesson. You have to lose sometimes.
| Melissa Hodde chapter 19 . 10/11/2014
Marvelous story, this. Marvelous. Realizing that I'm on chapter 19 of 20, I'm overtaken by a sense of doom and tragedy (which will hopefully fade when a new chapter comes out!)
If you'd like to know more about martial arts and losing, look up Aikido. It's a *relatively* young form of martial arts from Japan which emphasizes peaceful resolution of conflict, often by giving or seeming to give the attacker what they want. I think Harry (and professor Quirrell) would be intrigued.
Thank you for writing this, and especially for putting it out here on the internet where I can read it with gleeful fascination!
| Guest chapter 19 . 10/5/2014
| Katie Falcon The Plushie God chapter 19 . 9/26/2014
I like this Quirrell. This guy's a badass.
| Dark5pectre chapter 19 . 9/16/2014
This chapter actually put me into some deeper thought about myself. I'm a fairly competitive person; while I don't see myself as a particularly disgraceful loser, what I HAVE noticed after some thought, is that I tend to gleefully pounce on any weakness exhibited and crush the opponent as best as I can, even against first timers being unfamiliar with the game we are playing. Good chapter, made me think, and I hope to see this updated in the future.
| alix33 chapter 19 . 8/31/2014
That screen flickering on would make me miss my smart phone.
| eriz chapter 19 . 8/26/2014
Not quite sure what learning to loose does other then give you the experience so you can deal with it in the future.
Harry has become less clever. I feel like youre getting lazy.
Regardless, still a great fiction.
| martingonzalezcoll chapter 19 . 8/14/2014
Defense or Defence?
| thepkrmgc chapter 19 . 8/2/2014
despite knowing that quirril has voldy in the back of his head and is trying to mould harry into dark lord material, this blow to harry's pride can only be good for him
| ladydanni chapter 19 . 7/22/2014
That's insane. This version of the professor begs so many questions but that lower circle is going down in psychological history.
| Foxy-Floof chapter 19 . 7/3/2014
Damn. Did not see that coming. But then, Harry needed a knock-back. Rough, but VERY effective.
I've never had one like THAT before, but I've had my ass handed to me more than a few times.
| Jesper chapter 19 . 7/3/2014
I have only read to the part where Quirell calls harry an idiot, but I just want to say that I would find it hilarious if Quirell actually is going to train Harry in becoming a Dark Lord. If your plan is to make Voldemort Harrys mentor aswell, that would completely erase all the minus points I gave you for spoiling Dumbledore. If THAT happened, all would make sense and I would apologize to your ingenuity,
| Kevin chapter 19 . 6/20/2014
JUST KIDDING! RAVENCLAW!
| InArduisFidelius chapter 19 . 6/15/2014
Good lesson. But cruel.
| Tallman7 chapter 19 . 6/13/2014
Huh. That was deep. Actually and truly deep. Nice work.
| MHeywood chapter 19 . 6/3/2014
I just realized that what Quirrell did to Harry here is very similar to what Harry did to Neville at King's Cross. Consider when Quirrell tells Harry that, "You have just found out that the real world does not always work like your worst nightmares." That seems very similar to Harry's justification for his prank on Neville, that, "if he has nightmares about this instead, then it'll be nightmares involving horrible monsters who give you chocolate and that was sort of the whole point."
Both situations involve a character facing their worst fears and surviving them, thus learning that they are survivable. In Neville's case, it is the fear of bullying. In Harry's case, it is the fear of defeat and humiliation. Just an interesting parallel, especially since one is treated as an unnecessarily mean act and the other as a necessary lesson.
| silverrain-shiningsun chapter 19 . 5/17/2014
Hmm. Disturbing. But if it keeps Harry from going dark... Hmmm.
| xvector chapter 19 . 5/9/2014
Hmm. Your Quirrel seems a LOT more evil if I cab predict what's going on.
He seems like a wizened teacher, but in reality, through Pavlovian conditioning, he is breaking and reshaping Harry's willpower in the weakened image Voldemort wants it to be in.
| Wolf V Bunny chapter 19 . 2/28/2014
| Sparkysbro chapter 19 . 2/10/2014
Dammit. Another tough chapter.
| Sarah chapter 19 . 2/3/2014
I'm in love with your Quirrell. And I cried when Harry lost.
| teekayh chapter 19 . 1/26/2014
Wow. This just keeps getting better and better.
| Grizzmon chapter 19 . 1/13/2014
Control is very important.
| Dawn Darkling chapter 19 . 12/12/2013
Well, that was particularly interesting. No matter how many parallels I can draw with your HP, I cannot claim to have a temper like that. You write well and in such a way that it makes my stomach twist in guilt, as if I were Harry and suffering from his actions of that day.
| Amelia chapter 19 . 12/7/2013
This is amazing! I am 10 and scientist is now in my top 25 things I want to be when I grow up. I also say no comment before I even read this book. Also this book is hilarious I love it.
| HybridsRose chapter 19 . 11/16/2013
Wow, this chapter was brilliant. I loved the chapter title, 'delayed gratification' suits the events and moral in this chapter perfectly. The moral of learning how to lose is a little heard one, though it makes perfect sense. I'm glad it was used in this story and it taught Harry a lesson too. The OC Harry in this story has just inherited one of the likable qualities the original Harry had!
| Anon chapter 19 . 10/28/2013
VALDEMAR! AHHHHHHHHHHHHH! :D
| 1sunfun chapter 19 . 10/20/2013
A difficult chapter.
| Neloska chapter 19 . 10/15/2013
This was creepy. I honestly can't tell whether this was really for Harry's best or just a big mind fuck in order to mold Harry into what Quirrell wants and make him trust Quirrell. While building up to it, it somehow sounded logical making Harry accept losing, but it also feels completely wrong for a teacher to do that. I just hope that Harry won't start believing and following everything Quirrell says.
In contrast I like what you did with Harry's relationship with McGonagall. How in a way she has become Harry's moral foothold. Sometimes I miss the lightness of the first few chapters, but I also enjoy reading about Harry's worries and doubts.
And I love Dumbledore, the way he made himself look crazy on purpose. Not that I think he isn't crazy, just a different kind of crazy...
| BM chapter 19 . 10/10/2013
I just found this today. This is fantastic writing, characterisation, and plotting. I am completely engrossed. Thank you so much for writing it!
| Aetiem chapter 19 . 9/15/2013
What are...these tears?
Seriously, HOW did you get me to cry from this?
| BlondBlood chapter 19 . 8/29/2013
I don't know what to say. I just don't! I have always loved Harry potter and this puts in a very new light, which I both love and hate! I love how its the same story remade, but I'm still working to get my head around the differences in some of the characters... Quirell seems like a normal person, Ron is never mentioned, details that originally are hidden for years come into light far before they did in the original. I don't know if I like it or not, but I do know that it is a really well written novel and that I'm hooked!
| Guest chapter 19 . 8/28/2013
Mornelithe Falconsbane! Love the Valdemar reference!
| Benji-C chapter 19 . 8/20/2013
Wow. First let me say that your writing is superb.
I know that this is an old chapter but I felt I had to comment. Your ability to transition almost seamlessly from the serious to the farcical ,even merging the two in the same scene, is amazing and something I see in only the best writing.
Know on to what drove me to comment on this chapter. I am uncertain if the lesson Harry learned is one you learned or just something you believe. Or if you agree with it at all. Either way the core seemed to be submitting to a greater dominance/force can be necessary. I am uncertain if this is true in Harry's case. He holds a great monetary wealth. He could quite easily develop his personal power outside of Hogwarts. He could easily create an army of loyal followers to rival any other individual. To top it all off he has modern knowledge and could easily access current weapons tech. Why exactly does he need to be subservient to Snape? Why should he even pretend?
It is not difficult to learn from someone just because you are dominant to them. You can respect a professor for their knowledge without being submissive to them.
If I am misunderstanding something please message me saying so.
| addikhabbo chapter 19 . 8/14/2013
| Guest chapter 19 . 7/28/2013
Most unusual. This will take a bit of digesting.
| Crazy 8s chapter 19 . 7/26/2013
Your story is good in the beginning but by the time I got to chapter 19 I was bored out of my skull
| Sean. S chapter 19 . 7/13/2013
Wonderful story so far. Normally I review only when I have finished a story, but I felt the need to tell you how much I have enjoyed trying to justify in my mind just how to tie the world of the Valdemar series into that of Harry Potter. It is not common at all for fanfiction to grab me as throughly as that one short line did. Keep up the good work.
As I don't have a account, should you feel like responding to my review feel free to send me an e-mail at
| ArthurAlbionKirkland chapter 19 . 7/12/2013
If Quirrel turns out possessed I think I'll cry.
| Aaron chapter 19 . 7/9/2013
Voldemort does not strike me as the type of person who would be a Muggle dojo master to teach him anything, since Voldemort sees Muggles, and everyone else, in fact, as inferior. To Voldemort, he can accomplish anything himself, with magic. He wouldn’t grovel to a Muggle if his life depended on it.
| Guest chapter 19 . 7/3/2013
Why does Harry keep referring to Snape as 'Severus'? Did it in the last chapter too, at the height of his anger. If someone is tormenting you, why would you be on a first name basis, especially when others refer to him as Snape.
| Cemalidor chapter 19 . 7/3/2013
Wow, i have to say that THIS chapter was pretty deep and moving. :D Superb!
| Anon chapter 19 . 7/3/2013
This is so perfect, and it's almost 3 AM, and I need to go to sleep, but I just want to keep reading!
| Alissie chapter 19 . 6/30/2013
I'm kinda liking your Quirrel. A lot. Interesting... So Draco is to be a general? I can't wait to find out what that means...
QUESTION: What's their schedule like? You said they have a lot of DADA/Battle Magic... Wednesdays and Fridays, then? I thought it was just a long block once a week. Guess I was wrong. One heck of a first week!
| ShadowFireZelda chapter 19 . 6/24/2013
The twist of ideas and the constant back and forth of manipulation and politics is both confusing and satisfying at the same time. I can honestly say i have never met a fanfiction that has made me think like this one and i can also say i have never read a fanfiction that i want to stop reading and find out what happens next so completely at the same time. Seriously contact Rowling and see if you can get some way to have this published, I can't say it will be popular with the same crowd as the original Harry Potter, but it will certainly be appreciated by some.
| reddir chapter 19 . 6/23/2013
Ch 19: Brilliant. This 1) moved the story forward, 2) acknowledged _everything_ that's happened until now, 3) developed the personalities involved, and 4) transformed the inducement to wrist-cutting that was the last chapter into something...not just tolerable but positive, a stepping-stone to something that affirms the human spirit.
Point 4 is what I find meaningful, but it would have felt like a cheat and useless without the other 3.
Thanks for posting your writing, I feel privileged to have read it.
| richard.fsea chapter 19 . 5/28/2013
This deserves to be at the top of the list for "Most Follows/Favourites" downwards.
Harry Potter is more human in this story than he will ever be in Rowling's stories
Sorry if I've offended anyone.
| RussianDestruction chapter 19 . 4/23/2013
Wow. I wasn't sure how to feel about the how to lose lesson. Loved the end of the chapter though!
| sww11685 chapter 19 . 4/17/2013
Nice to see some character and background for Quirrell, and Harry needed to learn to think before he acts at the very least.
| The Three March Hares chapter 19 . 4/11/2013
Wow, it's like Quirrell is deliberately mentoring Harry to become a better Dark Lord...wait a second...that implies that Dumbledor is...hold that thought.
| Fuyutaro son chapter 19 . 4/5/2013
loved the first half of the chapter, and it was very well written, but the second half sucked. the explanations from Quirrell didn't fit harry at all, nor his situation. in Quirrell's story, he was the one that attacked first, while in Harry's situation he was defending himself, then backed down, then defended others (Hermione).
it's VERY different. in martial arts, they would tell you that the two are very different.
the martial art's aren't meant to be used to cause harm, only to defend. harry used his to defend, Quirrell didn't. also, valdies bit was very different from Harry's as well.
i think i would like the last half of the chapter if the explanatory story actually fit for Harry's situation.
| Guest chapter 19 . 3/8/2013
Whats all this bullshit about harry becoming a dark lord? woop dee do he backtalked snape theres no reason he should have to sit back and let a TEACHER mock him in front of everyone he knows. Also this 'lesson' was a complete joke and i dont know any 11 year old who can stand to lose when being mocked like that and whats with having him be beaten in front of all his friends? That was no lesson also why is he specifically being targeted all hes done is the snape thing. Also all this dark side/light side stuff is getting all kinds of stupid and annoying i hope it stops soon
| hervissa chapter 19 . 2/28/2013
I think that Quirell is someone entirely different than the man we saw in PS.
Martial arts? I wonder if Severus knows them..just imagine that, in his robes billowing around him, delivering blows and all... ;)
But it's great! Another part of magic we didn't know yet! :)
And Harry isn't the only one with a Temper xD There are maaaaany of others...but what Quirell did was good. Very good.
I wonder if he really has Voldy on the back of his head.
Does he even wear a turban? Or is he hiding Voldy's face with some spell? o.O :D
We shall see... xD
| Guest chapter 19 . 2/28/2013
| bclaire chapter 19 . 1/21/2013
this review is for this whole book...sorry.
i'm 67 yrs old, was in the circle of some environmental activists in earth first, even judi bari whom the fbi attempted to murder. and so angry and sad about aaron swartz's death. and listening to his friends and admirers on democracy now i've discovered this amazing novel and i'm so hooked. i love this. thanks
| Cloudedguardian chapter 19 . 1/7/2013
Can I do some applause as well?
| BreeDante23 chapter 19 . 1/5/2013
I don't know how I feel about this chapter. On the one hand, it was beautifully written, but I disliked the lesson quite viciously. I found it humiliating for Harry, and that he had to take that, but not seek revenge as a form of evolving? I wouldn't have been able to do it. Right now, I find myself hating Quirrell very much. It'll probably fade as I read the next chapter, but I reserve the right to hate his guts and be unhappy if those Slytherins don't get their just desserts.
On that note, kudos to our wonderful author for writing such an amazing piece. I can't remember the last time I was so emotional over a piece of writing, fanfic or book. I love, love, love! your story! I'm happy to be coming into it with so many chapters already written so I don't have to agonize over waiting for the next one. :)
| KsandraMallan chapter 19 . 12/21/2012
"The history of the world would be very different if Mornelithe Falconsbane or Hitler had grasped that elementary point. "
I just got the Falconsbane reference and choked. Hurray for Mercedes Lackey's Valdemar!
| Susan M. M chapter 19 . 12/20/2012
Loved the Misty Lackey reference! And huzzah for Gregory Goyle earning Quirrell points. As for the losing lesson ...interesting.
| StrangeoneXD chapter 19 . 12/16/2012
Promoted? Interesting. Malfoy was quick to agree. He's so edgar it's funny. There are three armies yes? ke. Depite how good he is painted, suspicions grow more
| Karen1216 chapter 19 . 12/16/2012
We all know that Prof Quirrell is the Dark Lord, and this chapter really got me thinking about his intention. Nonetheless, it shocked me greatly.
This is getting better and better.
| Dan Riddle chapter 19 . 12/15/2012
Dude, I hope you go on writing this story until chapter 1,000! (...at least!)
| Mr Norrell chapter 19 . 12/15/2012
The local college band started to beat a triumphant martial cadence when everyone started cheering for Harry. I don't know how you managed to pull it off so I'll simply assume that where ever he is that Harry snapped his fingers.
| Magicly Insane chapter 19 . 12/1/2012
I am slightly ashamed to say that I couldn't have gone through that. My first instinct would have been to strike hard and fast and completely and utterly destroy that boy to the point that no one would have made the mistake of attacking me again. Maybe that's wrong, but I've already dealt with bullying all through high school, and I swore that I wouldn't ever let it happen to me again. Or to anyone else if I could prevent it.
| Kohaku295 chapter 19 . 11/10/2012
Squee! Valdemar reference!
Very impressed with this fanfic so far.
| Guest chapter 19 . 9/7/2012
I thought Quirrel was evil? Apparently not.
. . .
I like it!
| Icetail1r chapter 19 . 9/3/2012
Damn! Why'd you have to go and make this story so righteous!
Fuck, it would have been a great story if you'd just made Naruto more devious, more manipulative! If you started the story so it implied that you shouldn't have changed it, even if it was gradual. I'm sorry, but this chapter was the last straw for me.
Aside from that however, I still have to say that your writing is impressive, grammar, spelling, sentence structure, plot (though a little slow) and research background is very accurate, good for all the readers who like this kind of plot.
There were some times when I was afraid that some people of lesser education (no insult intended) would not understand, I just think that you should keep in mind that your fiction is rated a T, there are bound to be some much younger people haven't learnt most of this. Explaining some of these theories to younger people may prove very difficult. That is basically the main feature for you to work on :)
Keep it up though! I'm sure there are many who like this story!
| EveBB chapter 19 . 8/18/2012
This was an extremely interesting chapter. While the lesson was intriguing, I thought it a bit odd that all of the students were cheering Harry's successful passing of his test. It seemed as if the were cheering that they were happy that he'd be a more powerful Dark Lord than others who had come before him.
Quirrell's motivations are a mystery to me. I can't wait to learn about him.
I know I'll be repeating this but I can't not say it: this is a fantastic fic.
| voodooqueen126 chapter 19 . 8/1/2012
"What is wrong with the Sorting Hat? That's not Slytherin, it's Gryffindor -"
I would have to say that, whilst in real life ambitious people are not usually awful...
It is true that in the books the Slytherines are consistently shown to be bullies and thugs: they are the sort of kids who would beat you and steal your stuff because someone's a nerd or whatever (and really their obsession with blood purity hints just as much as fear of the brilliant taking over them... Both Thomas Sowell and George Gilder discuss this).
Seriously you have nothing to fear from people who are courageous and well inclined to the heroic. Such people can be useful dupes to authoritarian regimes, but when they are informed by empiricism, are far more important to society than sociopathic racists..
Still this was a great chapter on the importance of having no pride. Personally I think that most women learn early how to lose dominance contests.
| Poetheather1 chapter 19 . 7/28/2012
What an intense chapter. That section on losing was very moving. I have endured Martial Arts classes like that and they have been hard to work through, so it was good to see something like that in a fanfic. Thank you.
| MareG8 chapter 19 . 7/26/2012
I teared up (and I might have shed a few but I'm not admitting to anything!
And I have a question. How come Harry started calling Snape Severus all of a sudden? He not only forewent the use of his title but skipped his first name and jumped to the last. And no one commented. Not even Snape, McGonigal, Dumbledore or Draco.
| noiha chapter 19 . 7/21/2012
man, quirrell is awesome! this chapter is awesome! xD
| Kevin Baker chapter 19 . 7/16/2012
Holy carp! Let me say that, while I am a voracious reader, I have never partaken of the Harry Potter series. I have seen the films and enjoyed them, but just never gotten around to the books.
I don't think I can read them now. This fanfic series is OUTSTANDING, and this chapter, Delayed Gratification was ASTONISHING. I cannot imagine reading J.K. Rowling now without remembering this and having her version suffer by comparison.
| Satirica chapter 19 . 7/16/2012
Letting students beat up other students in class...hmm...strange how Harry responds harshly to verbal abuse, but not physical? Perhaps it's because he learned a lesson out of all his. But, if last chapter was painful to read, this one was excruciating, to see shrewd parallel-universe Harry being pushed around and forced to become a submissive doormat. The end of the chapter sort of patched that up, though. However I'm starting to become very afraid of Parallel Universe Quirrell...
| Fudgecicles chapter 19 . 7/14/2012
loved it! definitely something harry needed to learn, in my opinion. and i definitely love this quirrell. way to take perhaps the worst teacher in harry potter and make him one of my favorites. a truly exceptional idea. of course, this leaves me wondering where the heck voldemort is, since he isn't in the back of quirrell's head...
| Kirinin chapter 19 . 7/10/2012
I'm not sure how I feel about this chapter. Oh, I should say the way you wrote it is marvelous as usual. It's just that Quirrell/LV is a very subtly horrible human being, which is no doubt what you intended.
| landofmyth chapter 19 . 7/8/2012
If Professor Quirrel turns out to be evil, I cannot decide whether I will be sad or impressed. That lesson, about the ability to lose, was a brilliant, invaluable gem of a lesson. It would be a tad bit sad if such a lesson were taught by a Dark Wizard, but at the same time, I would be very impressed. To learn from the enemy is a concept not often explored ... perhaps this will influence Harry's on views of Light vs Dark later on?
| PinkMusicalCherry chapter 19 . 6/28/2012
Umm, it says leave a COMMENT instead of a review? haha. ANYWAY, THIS WAS AWESOME. A WONDERFUL LESSON TO LEARN - FOR EVERYONE IN THIS WORLD! learning to lose.
I LOVE your Quirrell so much! So much better than Rowling's! I kinda hope he doesn't really have Voldemort on the back of his head because he is so awesome. Your Dumbledore SUCKS by the way, haha. Hate him! What a pervert sneaking into Lily's room.
| Conjectured chapter 19 . 6/21/2012
That which yields, is not always weak.
As I'm sure you've read before already. I love your story, very detailed with some hard-won truths. I can't wait to keep going! Hahah, I just had to stop and review this chapter.
| SirWalsingham chapter 19 . 6/10/2012
| cherapin chapter 19 . 6/3/2012
Such an an opportunity came to me in Boy Scouts while my father was Scoutmaster and had already taught me survival skills and, more importantly, had arranged plenty of occasions wherein I could practice said skills and learn to make them my own through experience. I had just recovered from a nasty bout of influenza, and was depleted in both strength and presence of mind, when, with all the other boys my age as witnesses, I systematically made every mistake one can make in a survival situation and required rescue from my older brother and his peers, with the final embarrassment of requiring rescue from drowning by the high-school principal's son - a known wimp. Of course, I made everything worse at first by trying to cover up my incompetence and weakness by lying, but my older brother removed that option. It was the worst half-day of my life up to that point but it prepared me for infinitely scarier and more humiliating experiences later in life - failures that have become lore and legend in my family to this day.
| HerGoldenHair chapter 19 . 5/23/2012
Do you just insert the name J K Rowling into any random sentence or nonsense phrase? xD
Ohmygoodness Draco! I'm going to squee over caring!Draco for a bit here, excuse me...
Woooow! I need to learn some new words to express myself in reviews... Well done Harry. Wonder what that professor is up to, exactly?
| GSYH chapter 19 . 4/30/2012
It kinda feel like I'm reading Artemis Fowl, which is cool because I like Artemis Fowl.
| fuck chapter 19 . 4/23/2012
everything in this story is extremely disgusting. the constant 'lessons' that harry learns are in fact extremely simple shitty form of writing of the author. is there no subtlety? ive been skipping chapter after chapter just skimming a few of them and all they do is reiterate 'don't become an evil dark lord'
i really dont understand the little AN in the beginning about the story starting up in chap 5-10, when the later chapters are just copies of the first few. I thought with 19 chapters in your writing would be better, but it was more like going from a D to an F because of absolutely no creativity
| natsu.point chapter 19 . 4/10/2012
You have an interesting mind.
It seems every chapter in this story is very special in its own way. And I think it wouldn't surprise me if the next chapters that I would read would be just as outstanding as this one and the previous one.
| Hidden Lines chapter 19 . 4/8/2012
This chapter was...touching. There's just something heartwarming about sharing stories of your experience in a fighting dojo. Manly tears were shed.
On a more serious note, I like the way Quirrel acts like a normal teacher. His book self is...anticlimatic? Disappointing? Stupid? Something like that. Your Quirrel is a lot more suited to being a Battle Magic teacher. Or maybe it's really Voldemort. Who knows. Either way, I like.
| selquist chapter 19 . 3/25/2012
I am trying to figure out whether you are setting up incredibly complicated foreshadowed plots, or using the "reuse everything" method of creating a fleshed out D&D campaign.
| selquist chapter 19 . 3/25/2012
"...Should I hear that you have failed, as Mr. Potter failed today, I will make the appropriate arrangements and apologize to you and whomever you have hurt. I do not think this will be necessary, however."
woooaah... I wonder if Quirrel will consider the latest fiasco w/ Hermione a situation where he was supposed to lose? (It doesn't seem like it would be to his House's advantage, and it would not have been to the advantage of whoever is trying to remove him.) That seems like a little too complicated plotting.
| SqrlLrd chapter 19 . 3/12/2012
| Alma Gloriosa chapter 19 . 3/2/2012
The two best chapters of fanfiction I've ever read, hands down. Possibly the two best chapters of anything. You, my dear author, are a genius.
| marneus calgar chapter 19 . 3/2/2012
Loving your story so far.
I must say, I loved the warhammer reference too
| The Blind One chapter 19 . 2/23/2012
The minions' mobster act never fails to amuse me.
The Slytherin and the essentially-a-Slytherin being all... *Slytherin* at each other are also funny.
Mmkay, this is the second time, I think. What does Draco have that makes "the background noises [go] to blurs in [his] presence"? Presumably it's related to Lucius' later thing during the talking-at-cross-purposes bit, but what IS it? Maybe a modified Muffliato, courtesy of dear family friend Snape?
Ah, cynicism. I'll bet it never occurred to anybody out of all Slytherin, and certainly not Harry, that there could be any reason for Dumbledore's trust of Snape other than blackmail.
You know, Quirrell's damnably hard to dislike, even knowing the truth.
Hmm, I wonder when the Evil Overlord List came along. *checks TVTropes* The main version wouldn't have been around yet, then. Oh well.
Goyle was the one with the "suspiciously balanced-looking stance" way back when Harry met the minions. Yay, continuity!
Something about this sequence makes me grin so hard my face hurts. Quirrell. Is a sixth-dan black belt. And can *think.* "This is gonna be properly awesome," I thought the first time 'round, and that sentiment holds.
"Harry thought he saw a hint of pain, a touch of sorrow, in those eyes." Aaaaargh. On a more coherent note, I wonder what elements of this story are true. Clearly someone now living in this body learned martial arts somewhere, and it seems *likely* that something needing that kind of coordination would be best left to the person with a couple decades' experience in the body. (Which brings up the question of how much of the public persona is Quirrell, and under what circumstances Riddle is along for the ride, but that's another matter.)
Lovely, Quirrell teaching Harry to lose calmly. This can only bode well.
| Robbie the Phoenix chapter 19 . 2/18/2012
I just realised it's been a few chapters since I reviewed (which says a lot about how absorbed in this story I've become), so I just wanted to say how intrigued I am by Quirrell. None of my previous theories seem to account for what I'm seeing, except perhaps that he is not Quirrell.
Suffice it to say, I'm still thoroughly enjoying this story and the mystery you're weaving through it. Now, onto the next chapter.
| Mantis FA chapter 19 . 12/13/2011
It strikes me that, if this version of Voldemort still has multiple Horcruxes (questionable that he'd need them, with one of them already *outside the solar system,*) he might have been inspired by the fate of the Silmarils. We know he sent one into the sky; another might be sunk somewhere in the Challenger Deep, with a third buried deep under a lava flow, or even forced down the gullet of an active volcano drift forever in the magma reservoir below.
| catinthebath chapter 19 . 12/4/2011
Quirrell is AWESOME! I love him! And you seem to have taught a very valuble lesson to all your readers, not just Harry and his classmates. XD
| Deadzepplin chapter 19 . 11/28/2011
That was awesome Quirriell/Voldes is a really cool teacher
| DracoFrodo chapter 19 . 11/26/2011
I like this story a lot but there is just too much going on within the FIRST WEEK of school in his FIRST YEAR. So I know you've already written a lot but it's my hope that it goes quicker... also I wish that the teachers weren't so formal with Draco's name bur that's just me. thanks for the story!
| BoTheIceman chapter 19 . 11/14/2011
One of the better chapters. Not bogged down in complicated ruminations, or setting the stage for something, but a real vignette in it's own right. Not to mention a potential key turning point in Harry's life. The philosophies surrounding the lesson, with it's muggle parts seamlessly woven in as well as revealing some extremely key information were very believable and fascinating. Makes me want to read the next chapter...well done!
| Asparagus chapter 19 . 10/15/2011
My first guess has been that Quirrell is still merged with Voldemort, only they merged differently and that the cool teacher part is Volde while the dying animal part is what was left of Quirrell.
But now I'm not so sure.
| Jonakhensu chapter 19 . 10/12/2011
Harry's beat down should have had pie.
| AR chapter 19 . 9/21/2011
"Losing must be thinkable"
My God..I simply do not understand how you are able to THINK of all this.
Pride often leads us astray doesn't it? And I applaud how you managed to recognize that pride is very often a simple shield for fear. He needed that lesson and will be better for it.
I say that even when I recognize the bitterness, anger and disbelief upon imagining myself in a similar situation.
It was an impossible task for him to do. He did it well.
As did you...amazing.
| Mz Luna Potter chapter 19 . 9/11/2011
Yay, Harry isn't going to turn evil any more!
| Reader123456789 chapter 19 . 9/4/2011
Nice chapter! I liked it a lot.
| madeyemarauder chapter 19 . 8/29/2011
This not NOT in any way sound like our Tom-boy.
| narutonejii chapter 19 . 8/28/2011
Delayed gratification indeed...
for that chapter. I think you taught me a lesson as well. About losing and not always having to win. I appreciate that.
| Fenrir666 chapter 19 . 8/25/2011
I love this Quirrell.
| Celexs Draconia chapter 19 . 8/22/2011
This story is really really well done. I am placing a review here so i wont forget my comments. This story moves in fifty different directions at once. This chapter had me loathing Quirrel and then by the end liking what he had done. I know for a fact if i had been in Harry's place i would have walked out and not returned, regardless of any consequences. It would be a very painful lesson to learn in reality and the way it was done was fitting. I would however like to know what Quirrel and Draco actually said to the three older Slytherins. Excellent work.
| StarryEyedReader chapter 19 . 8/15/2011
errrr I was such a snape fan...still am. I didn't really like snape being the bad slytherin and Quirell with voldy in his head as the good guy...
or is this all some plot?
| lizoftheinfinite chapter 19 . 7/30/2011
just . . .
that was such a good chapter for Harry, especially considering his characterization up to this point. I have a feeling the ability to loose will be very good for him. :)
| hejsdfsjkf chapter 19 . 7/28/2011
Ok so I'm about halfway through this fic and I have to say, I don't really think that what you are trying to say is suited for a fanfic. It would be better done as a meta essay. I agree with some of your points eg the Seeker being a stupid position, and the implausibility of some parts of wizarding culture but it doesn't fit into the flow of the story. IDGI because normally I like this sort of overly serious analysis of fantasy worlds but it just feels like you put it into fic form because more people would read it that way even if it doesn't fit.
I don't feel that any of the characters here resemble the canon characters at all. That's the point, you might say, this is supposed to show how they've changed, but even the ones who haven't changed as much as Harry are nigh on unrecognisable. You don't give Hermione enough credit, basically casting her as just an irritating prissy parrot (do I detect a touch of "girls can't have real intelligence?"), and you give Draco Malfoy way too much credit for what is supposed to be a cowardly rich boy relying on his daddy's money and rep (manipulation classes? Really? Why don't the other Slytherins like him in canon apart from his minions then? If he's so smart what was with that stupid necklace plan?), but then over-glamourizing Slytherin is a perpetual problem of this fandom. This feels like one of those character-bashing fics. And even before Harry showed us his "Dark Side", I really really hated him. This Harry is an insufferable little shit. I can read about unlikable characters, and I realize he's meant to be somewhat, but this is just you putting your viewpoints into Harry's mouth, or occasionally other characters', when you want to anvil him (and us) on the head with a lesson. Your Harry is a Canon Sue. And he knows things which haven't been told to him within the same scene. In the shop he knew Lucius' name before it had been told to him and he didn't even know who the Malfoys were before that. There are a couple other instances of this as well.
"Enlightenment cultures" are really no better about rape than anywhere else in the world. See recent Dominique Strauss-Khan case, and the thousands of rapes that the state can't even be arsed to prosecute, because nobody will listen to the victims and the police and courts don't see it as a priority. You still can get away with rape anywhere and it really pissed me off to see this discussed in such a wrongheaded way in a fic that is supposed to be about rationality and knowledge. You might say that Harry isn't supposed to know any better cause he's only 11, but why not? He seems to know everything else!
I'm continuing to read because there are some funny (if OOC) bits, like that one with Draco and Harry in the robe shop, and the game, and some of the realizations Harry has (such as the one about choosing to possibly become evil because he can't take not being speshul) are emotionally powerful but it might get too annoying. It just goes to show that no matter how right you are, if you're a dick about it people won't listen.
| thechemicalbanana chapter 19 . 7/27/2011
I cried in this chapter, I really dont know why..
this is like the third time that I tried to finish read this story but there is so much complicated things that not even in spanish can undestand..
but well I really hope read the total fic, because so much reviews are saying something, i think..
Im very sorry for mistakes and congrats for such great story:D
| solsbane chapter 19 . 7/27/2011
I swear I read the genre as Drama/Humor.
But this chapter was pretty scary.
I haven't read enough to say where you're going with this plot, but I must say it looks SO promising.
Hope you'll update soon, and hope that I'll catch up to 72 before you do.
| Isa Knightwalker chapter 19 . 7/11/2011
Kind of weird, it doesn't really seem like that great of a lesson from a teacher. Also super weird that Goyle knew some muggle Martial Arts when he really doesn't seem to have those skills. But interesting chapter too.
| Kila9Nishika chapter 19 . 7/8/2011
Squee! You mentioned Mornelithe Falconsbane! From Valdemar! YAY!
Cool story - but a bit strange. The type that I can't figure out if I love it or hate it.
*That's a compliment, btw.*
| Guest chapter 19 . 7/5/2011
Very engaging chapter. A strong and appealing contrast to the humor of others.
| Winni3 chapter 19 . 7/1/2011
Hmm wow Harry is very flawed and this is getting more serious than I expected (whereas at the beginning I didn't think it was serious enough for some reason) but I like it :)
| Geonomis chapter 19 . 6/30/2011
Your writing always seems to covey a timeless, efortless Grace. I Cannot wait to read more and I am rereading your story from beginning to end; I find myself as endlessly entertained as I was at first. This tale is One for the ages.
| Mezzavia chapter 19 . 6/8/2011
Harry's need to exploit Draco's offer is kind of sad. Can he really not let himself go.. Does he really not want any friends?
I don't know what to think about Quirrel. He does seem to be helping, in a twisted way, but the things he says IN FRONT of everyone can be harmful. It's like he's slowly trying to convince everyone that Harry's the next Dark Lord.
I think Harry's read a bit too many novels and set his ideals/objectives a bit too high. He doesn't seem to know what real life is -seems pretty detached from reality to me- and needs to give every single behavour and psychological pattern a name. (Then, when Dumbledore confused the hell out of him, he didn't even take into consideration Dumbledore doing it on purpose.. I would at least have expected so from someone as paranoid as Harry is.) He can't seem to accept..averageness, for the lack of a better term. Quirrel's lesson about losing was indeed needed. Badly :/. When he succeeded, it was very touching. I was moved x). It was also very clever of him (of you) to use that opportunity to ingratiate himself with the Slytherins :).
(I forgot to tell you earlier, but the Quirrel Points were a magnificent idea [: ! SO helpful - I really wish we had something like that in my class.)
| Esreque chapter 19 . 5/28/2011
You... -twitch- Mornelithe Falconsbane? My dear author, am I correct in assuming that I've found a fellow Mercedes Lackey reader?
| TsukiNoBara chapter 19 . 5/10/2011
This chapter is now making me wonder if Voldemort has possessed Quirrel at all. Interesting.
| Innoxious chapter 19 . 5/10/2011
I have so far been pretty impressed with your theories and 'techno-babble' but i have to say i don't really get this chapter at all... Pretty much all this looks like it's saying is that you're suppose to beg and cry and plead like a little coward instead of protecting yourself or standing up for what you believe in? To me that would be like seeing a cop beating child to death, but then you decide to leave and report it later because he is bigger and more 'dominant'. Being a coward and learning to lose is not an admirable trait or lesson to be learned, to me at least.
I could understand if you were talking about 'pretending' to loose or 'acting' scared so you take less damage until you're in a better position to get revenge, get away, or stall for help. Or a lesson on picking your battles so you wont lose, or even on recovering from a loss if you give it your all, but you're talking about giving up and begging for mercy before you even try which i don't get at all...
The only thing i could see the actual exercise (but not the lecture) teaching him is to ignore (and MAYBE control) his temper.
Ehh since the story has been good so far i will give you the benefit of the doubt and say that maybe im reading it wrong, or maybe that the teacher is evil and trying to teach harry to be a coward to help himself win or something... i will however continue to believe that if someone attacks me with the intent to kill or seriously injure me, that i wont go into coward mode and cry/beg for mercy as my first method of defense, but at least try and fight back.
Other then that its been a great story so far, i really like reading the intelligent harry.
| Ocean Starfly chapter 19 . 4/15/2011
This is the best chapter so far. Hogwarts seems more like a regular American school in this 'verse (I don't know how much it's like a British school). This story, and particularly this chapter, is turning out to focus more on Harry's life in Hogwarts than his hero status like in the original. I'm liking Harry more and more as I read and his personality develops along with the storyline. While reading this chapter I had the thought that Harry could be schizophrenic, dismissed it, and then realized that that is actually quite plausible. (And now I'm wondering why Harry hasn't thought of mental disorders to explain his Dark Side or anything else yet; I suppose discovering a magical world makes you suspect more interesting and magical answers first.) I'm also now wishing that I had been as smart (read: calculating) as Harry when I was in middle school or when I started high school and that I had gone to a regular school so I could have freaked bullies out like Harry. Of course, I'd probably have ended up turning to my Dark Side.
Oh, and in case I don't go back and review previous chapters (I was getting into the story and kept reading) I loved the whole thing with Harry trying to blackmail Snape and Dumbledore and the subsequent public apologies - and of course Harry's use of snapping to emulate Comed-Tea (which I really, REALLY wish existed - it is pure genius).
Methods of Rationality's Harry is growing on me more and more as I read. Harry is kind of like me - intelligent so that he seems mature, but actually immature and childish. The lesson he learned in this chapter is beyond awesome; I can't even begin to say how amazing Quirrell's lesson is - and a lesson I wish I could be taught but will have to settle for learning in some other way. Hope this holds true for the rest of the book. Keep up the amazing work.
| Kitty O chapter 19 . 4/8/2011
ThOugh that is the craziest methodology I've ever read, I do agree that knowing when to lose is good. Some things Quirrel says makes my eyebrows rise. But that, I liked. But then there's losing against a teacher, and there's losing against a student. When someone hits me, I hit back. But if someone beat me up, I wouldn't beat them once I was strong... Maybe I have a lesson to learn? Maybe not.
| yungatheart chapter 19 . 4/1/2011
Wow! This story is insane but its good. Harry is insane. Dumbledore is insane. I love it. Harry is really something else. Sometimes he is an idiot while being a genius.
| Akatsuki210 chapter 19 . 3/26/2011
That was an *amazing* chapter! I really like your version of Professor Quirrell. The scene at the end where everyone's cheering for Harry and Quirrell gives back all the House Points that Snape took away was really heartwarming. I felt so bad for Quirrell when he was telling that story about his old dojo...
| janefanatic chapter 19 . 3/5/2011
This chapter was beyond amazing; the lesson was fantastic, if that's the right word. I am intrigued by the Harry/Draco dynamic; it seems like both of them are at once turning the other and being themselves seduced. It's quite fascinating!
| hey nonny nonny chapter 19 . 2/28/2011
/"Another bit of advice," Draco said hurriedly as Quirrell slouched toward his desk,
better his desk than bethlehem.
| Kerr Avonsen chapter 19 . 2/27/2011
What on earth is Quirrelmort playing at? It's a deep game, whatever it is.
| ARMH chapter 19 . 2/20/2011
I really liked this chapter. I really can't remember many chapters that include classes in the more recent chapters (like in the 60-69) but I think you should maybe revisit them in your writing.
| Emerauldessence chapter 19 . 2/13/2011
It seems the dojo master was of the do as I say, not as I do school of thought. If humility was such an important lesson to him, then why did he trade the lives of all his pupils for his pride?
My objections to this chapter is a matter of personal opinion rather than constructive criticism. Im afraid I have difficulty imagining appreciating anyone who would expose me at my weakest to everyone as if they have that right. If someone had a problem with me, I expect them to talk to me and me alone. Anyone who refuses to do that doesnt have the right to be my teacher because they obviously value their own ego over my growth.
| Moonlit Wave chapter 19 . 2/7/2011
Why do I is it that every BM/DADA lesson I can clearly see Harry digging his grave deeper and deeper and Quirell(mort?) throwing earth on him from above? This image just appears before my eyes...
| Celebwen Telcontar chapter 19 . 2/7/2011
Mornelithe Falconsbane? Is the Velgarth universe (Valdemar, Karse, Hardorn, Rethwellan, the Eastern Empire, etc...) the ancient part of the modern Wizarding World? And in that case, what happened to Valdemar, the Companions, the Grove, the Tayledras and their Bondbirds, and everyone else?
| Markus Ramikin chapter 19 . 1/30/2011
Chapter 19 - At the same time disturbing but exceedingly good.
This is clearly Ender's Game material. Anything like that applied to real children would be incredibly stupid, but in this kind of fiction and with this kind of protagonist, it works.
Unfortunately, as someone else pointed out, the rest of the class are also kids, and not all of them are Harry Potter/Ender Wiggin. This sort of a lesson would be hard for a 16 year old, even many adults; little kids aren't built not only to take it in a way that would truly give them greater wisdom, but even to benefit from witnessing it.
I have strong mixed feelings about this, but I'd like to reemphasise that "mixed" means there are strong positives ones in the mixture as well. So again, this is disturbing, but very, very, very good.
| provorse chapter 19 . 1/18/2011
you know in most ffics i dont like quirrel. hes usually killed off quickly, or has any other kind of importance (besides being possesed by voldemort...but... i love this guy! you've made him too cool not to. this story is really really good and the way you write blows me away. consider doing this for a living.
| Voievoda chapter 19 . 1/7/2011
Wow. Just wow. This has been fantastic so far. I can not form into words the awe I have felt in reading this story. Sometimes I love it , sometimes I hate it. But it's brilliant. Absolutely brilliant.
It is like someone threw Discworld and Harry Potter togethor to see what would happen. Also, I love Harry's 'Luggage'.
| DukeAtreides22 chapter 19 . 1/6/2011
What an amazing chapter. I really like your expansion of Quirrel
| Tangshou chapter 19 . 1/4/2011
Some good fun with inexperienced minions.
The writing about martial arts was...correct, but felt contrived. Like it was written by someone who knows about martial arts but has little or know personal experience. Nice that MA was mentioned though. It would give a lot of benefits for wand dueling.
| cmcl chapter 19 . 1/1/2011
Did something change in Chapter 19 today? It showed up in my RSS feed and I was all excited that there was a new chapter, and then I realized it was an old one.
| Gelacacine chapter 19 . 12/13/2010
a) Voldemort wrote the evil overlord list (awesome)
b) Voldemort's revenge for a lesson is frightening
| MungoJerry chapter 19 . 12/13/2010
I know it seems like it was a good exercise, but it still doesn't feel right..
Also, you should know you are responsible for the creation of this COCAINE.
| w chapter 19 . 12/12/2010
"Harry's stomach sank. He had apparently said something very significant and he did not know why. This was not a good sign." He does need to be more careful when playing around.
"I'm open to that," said Harry, who was already trying to figure out how to exploit it.
"That's an odd question, Professor," said Draco. "I mean,
who'd be dumb enough to admit it?"
"You, Mr. Potter, are an idiot. But then so was I at your age. Thus I anticipated your answer and altered today's lesson plan accordingly. Mr. Gregory Goyle, if you would come forward, please?"
No, I'd need to copy-paste the entire chapter. Quite amazing.
| You. Are. Brilliant chapter 19 . 11/29/2010
Also confusing the hell out of me. The only model I can form at this point, with the extra-textual knowledge that Professor Quirrell is in fact Voldemort (at least in part), is that Voldemort is sufficiently far-sighted and calculating to conclude that he'd rather have a *highly competent potentially ally* in Harry, even if that means that he might have a *highly competent enemy* in Harry, than have a *potentially ally with a fatal weakness* in Harry, even if that means that he might have an *enemy with a fatal weakness*. Which is awfully fearless and coldly calculating even for a Dark Lord.
I'm also fairly sure that Voldemort was the student in both cases, and there were two different dojos. That he slaughtered everyone in the first dojo in a cold rage, and then noticed that he had *utterly failed to achieve his goal of learning martial arts*, and went to the second-best dojo in the world and learned the lesson as described by Quirrel. Which admirably explains why he was the closest thing to a *successful* Dark Lord in hundreds of years.
In other news, I had to re-read the Harry Potter/Snape confrontation chapters twice in order to fully make sense of them-which is positive feedback, not negative, because I *definitely* had the emotional sense of *being Harry*, of being dragged along by events far faster than even his brain could keep up with. It was wonderful, as was the ability to go back and re-read it slowly and rationally, and get the full texture and richness of the story and sub-texts out of it.
P.S. Just out of curiosity-are you still reading these reviews? I'm if you are, and would be so kind as to drop me a line telling me so.
| Alwendil chapter 19 . 11/24/2010
Absolutely wonderful chapter, and I have actually thought about martial arts in addition to magic myself. Yay for me for being a fraction as ingenious as you!
Harry's character development and internal conflict is amazing, and your light parody of the Harry Potter world is very entertaining.
I just noticed that you have 9,330 reviews in only 9 months, the best average I have seen to date. You totally deserve it!
| Itachi's aprentice chapter 19 . 11/21/2010
| Sheaman chapter 19 . 11/7/2010
I believe that I have reviewed this story before, at least partially, so I'll just speak generally.
I like this story very much. There are parts that are not as good as the general quality, but overall it is very clever and quite enjoyable. This is my second time through it thus far.
One thing that I wanted to point out was how disturbing I found Harry's lesson to be. At first, I couldn't place just what the cause was. I thought it might be the disparity between what happened and what the general assumption of what would happen, but upon further reflection, I don't think that's it. No, what bothers me so much about that scene is that it reminds me of a rape scene. Being ganged up upon, physically overpowered, maliciously dominated...I had to suppress some mild nausea. I'm fairly certain that that was the point; if so, congratulations. If I missed the mark completely, now you know that at least one person is getting that impression. If there had not already been reviews to that effect.
There was more, but I'll leave it for a more opportune time.
| Arturo Vandorien chapter 19 . 11/6/2010
man this is a curious story. I'm trying to figure Quirrell out. Is he possessed by Voldemort? If so, why is he giving such good lessons, especially to Harry? If not, what's the deal with the zombie-like strolling and odd behavior when not teaching? I'm sure it'll be explained, but it's very odd behavior either way.
| AspergianStoryteller chapter 19 . 11/2/2010
| x chapter 19 . 10/24/2010
this was really interesting
| Indigo Ziona chapter 19 . 10/17/2010
I really like your Quirrell.
"In any case, when I was thirteen years old, I read through the historical sections of the Hogwarts library, scrutinizing the lives and fates of past Dark Lords, and I made a list of all the mistakes that I would never make when I was a Dark Lord -"
Isn't this the Evil Overlord list? :)
| celopmuh chapter 19 . 10/16/2010
I, really, don't like, the way, Harry speaks in that chapter. The commas don't work well. At all.
| Nerdfish chapter 19 . 10/12/2010
you are completely obliterating my research capacity for tomorrow.
| Karsus chapter 19 . 10/7/2010
| LunaSlashSea chapter 19 . 10/6/2010
Excellent chapter. Love the reference to Mornelithe Falconsbane.
| Nakedkali chapter 19 . 10/5/2010
exceptionally tasty snacks, and some extremely light reading from the Hogwarts library: hmm, why doesn't anyone else wonder why these things are there, and why it is a surprise to Harry and the readers. Who is Quirrell entertaining?
| Rebel Goddess chapter 19 . 9/20/2010
Messed up submission of reviews having read offline so this is for 18: That's a very inventive use of Crabbe and Goyle. You know you wrote that you were keeping all other characters the same? You've just made Draco way too smart. Otherwise excellent scene.
19 - Fascinating lesson in losing well. Not sure I'm convinced by the logic but it made a great chapter.
| woofwoofus chapter 19 . 9/14/2010
Whew... up to chapter 20 so far... I must say that this is one of the best fics I've read... EVER!
You sir, are a true writer of the first class.
Your charecterisation is great, story telling fantastic and humor amazing!
Your ability to come up with theories about the magical things is awesome. I really liked the Come-tea part. After reading a bit from LessWrong I saw where some of the theories came from but your ability to put them in a story as part of the narrative and situations is very good.
Harry does work fast doesn't he? 3 weeks in school and already he got Snape to apologise. We're not even at Christmas yet!
How batty is Dumbledore actually? he seems a bit off...
That goes the same for Quirrell... Am I correct in assuming that Voldemort is possessing Quirrell during the lessons, which takes a lot out of Quirrell himself so he's zombie-like at all other times?
I guess I'll find out either way...
Thanks again for the story!
| Crazy Iemon chapter 19 . 8/28/2010
I honestly don't know what to think of this story. It's so...deep. The characterization is all weird and I can't tell if this is partial AU (where you take the base of the characters and changed them based on trigged events) or full AU (where look at each character with no preconceptions in mind). But it doesn't seem to matter because this story is making me think in ways I've never thought before. o.o
| Donteatacowman chapter 19 . 8/22/2010
I can't decide whether I think that Quirrell's method was right. Once again, the more-good-than-harm thing comes into play. Ah well, not for me to judge.
"His pouch lay there, now containing his protected but still potentially fragile Time-Turner."
And... HIS FATHER'S ROCK! :O
| gidro chapter 19 . 8/14/2010
19 chapters, still looking for hermione. It's more a Harry P. / Harry .P... him and his ego !
good story though, juste hope the others characters ( hermione, drago, macgo, maybe dumby and neville )will be there more often.
Wondering how long will be this story. 20 chapters for what ? 40 days ? with a jump in time between the letter and 1st september... And this is a 1st year. Voldemort will be dead before christmas, or the readers before the 1/4 of the story, if you are thinking of doing 7 years !
But i keep on reading
| Athla chapter 19 . 8/2/2010
...I don't think I could do it.
anyways, one hell of a chapter.
| Tara Ash chapter 19 . 7/30/2010
But I don't *want* to like Quirrel! He's training Harry to be the next Dark Lord! And that's almost, kinda, sorta, probably, bad-ish. Right? I'm bad at mysteries.
Fortunately for me, I have a few chapters left. :)
Love this chapter, but I can't shake the feeling that Quirrel is *still* bad news,
Although, he *is* turban-less. Does that means he isn't being controlled by the Dark Lord? But he goes all zombie-y, which really *can't* be a good sign . . .
Please keep up updating, I don't do well with mixed confusion and curiosity! :)
| Michael Aurum chapter 19 . 6/28/2010
I'm a college freshman, and a friend who's slightly more intellectual than he was allowed to be recommended this fanfic. I should be honing my skills in mathematical proving, which I suck at, and doing my problem sets, but nooo. You had to make this a worthy read.
| mist shadow chapter 19 . 6/24/2010
nice brainwash - damn, Quirrell, or rather whoever he actually is, is real good phycologist here. *shudders*
| James Birdsong chapter 19 . 6/24/2010
| dogbertcarroll chapter 19 . 6/13/2010
I think Q is trying to help Harry as a means of removing the competition ahead of time.
| Kate chapter 19 . 6/12/2010
YOUR QUIRRELMORT IS FULL. OF. WIN.
| Vampyromaniac chapter 19 . 6/11/2010
It's disconcerting every time someone in the British Hogwarts says 'period' instead of 'full stop'.
You were right about hitting your stride in chapter 5 - Harry's meeting Draco was hilarious and it has only gotten better from there. Particularly enjoyed Hermione's Comed Tea experiments, Harry's game/prank and everything you've done with time travel. As an ardent fan of the Harry Potter books and a casual reader of Less Wrong who found this fanfic through that site (and not the other way around, as apparently is more common?) I'm loving this alternate Potterverse. Not least because you've catered for my personal opinion that Hermione belongs in Ravenclaw and Ron hardly belongs in the story! Keep up the great work.
| Bystander chapter 19 . 6/10/2010
an important lesson learned in humility, and reality. I applaud.
| Psalmy chapter 19 . 6/10/2010
This may be the most amazing chapter I've experienced in fanfiction, and is a contender to the best one I've ever read.
| Arkh Cthuul chapter 19 . 6/7/2010
This chapter makes my brain hurt due to all the terrible explanations I ahve for Riddlemort to act this way.
Very good once more.
| Veltzeh chapter 19 . 6/6/2010
I recall some comments about child abuse with respect to this chapter (19). I thought about it, then forgot it and remembered it again and now I even have something coherent to say! Though someone else has probably said this earlier with different words. Anyway, on the subject of abuse:
The way Harry was pushed around by those older Slytherins with Quirrell's approval certainly seems like abuse. However, Harry himself approved it and instead of being and feeling completely helpless and unable to flee, prevent or rationalize it, he understood why it happened or needed to happen and tried his best to learn something he was told he was being taught. I don't take a stand on whether that was a useful or good lesson in this comment at least, but Harry thinks so and that's what matters, whether he was tricked into it or not.
If the humiliating pushing around, to which Harry gave consent, truly is defined as abuse, is it still right to deny someone the possibility to learn something from it if the target of abuse believes it would be valuable? And if the target of what seems to be abuse when taken out of context doesn't see it as abuse within context, is it really abuse?
The above does expect Harry to be mature enough to understand it, and apparently more mature than any eleven-year-old could be, but I guess by now it's clear that Harry is that mature in the story regardless of how mature a real-world kid would be. I'm willing to suspend my belief on that!
Anyway, the original books were way worse. A simple example is Snape and Harry. Harry doesn't even have a clue why Snape constantly picks on him for a long time, and yet he doesn't really do anything about it, which is most likely because that was the norm with Dursleys, so it's something safe and familiar. And what the kids do to each other in Hogwarts while (some of) the teachers don't care and how Harry is often singled out... reading about that in the originals always made me cringe terribly.
And unlike in this fic, I couldn't rationalize those scenes in the originals!
I like reading stuff I can understand with some thinking; kudos to that.
| Khadon chapter 19 . 6/5/2010
Okay, I just had to stop mid chapter to give you credit again for the awesome Valdemar reference.
Now there was a good name for an evil wizard.
| Wolfric chapter 19 . 5/22/2010
Interesting chapter. Thanks for writing. W.
| Mr.Destructo chapter 19 . 5/21/2010
omg a review!
| dragaan chapter 19 . 5/19/2010
Just wanted to say that this chapter was simply amazing. The thought and depth in this chapter was astounding. In order to truly win, one must learn to first lose. There is a difference between knowing and understanding a lesson. Before I read this chapter, I definitely had known of this lesson. After reading this chapter, I took my first step towards understanding this important lesson. And for that, you have my gratitude and admiration!
| CeilingFan chapter 19 . 5/15/2010
Ooh. That was surprisingly difficult to read. I think I would fail at this not being a dark lord business.
| Loonynamelass chapter 19 . 5/13/2010
Haha, this was awesome. Got to go now, but I'll read the next chapter tomorrow for sure!
| Nielso chapter 19 . 5/13/2010
By the way I kinda feel cheated as a reader that you would make Quirrel LV. I mean that is just very not this story!
| Jinx of the 2nd Law chapter 19 . 5/11/2010
Many fans have vilified the house of Slytherin. It is a house for those who desire power. It is not an evil place, just as not all power is inherently evil, or used for evil.
The hierarchies of the wizarding world are unfamiliar to the Muggles, with their notions of democracy and personal freedom. But they do serve a purpose in that world.
Thank you for another excellent, thought inspiring chapter!
| acepro Evolution chapter 19 . 5/11/2010
I'm truly surprised. There has never been a story where the depiction of Professor Quirrell was so detailed. The way in which you described his lesson was inspiring for it the way in which you did it just hits you with awe.
As I read more of this I wonder if this is going to be this way for a number of cast characters, especially ones that are not very well known like Madam Rosmerta, Rita Skeeter and Gilderoy Lockhart. These characters have just as much to teach as Professor Quirrell and I suspect that many readers (including myself) would be very surprised to see a detailed account of their character and personalities which was lacking in the books and movies.
Till next time and remember. . .
. . . WICKET UN TUSH ON LEG!
| bluewillow chapter 19 . 5/11/2010
I was thinking about this chapter last night, and how Q/V and Snape, in their own ways, sought to teach Harry a lesson about celebrity and leadership - and I'm wondering if Snape's wasn't more useful, in the end. It seems as though Q/V almost set up the entire exercise so that Harry could experience the adulation and admiration of the class for having survived and understood his experience - building him up as "a leader" in his own estimation and in the eyes of others. Perhaps he intends to manipulate Harry to his own ends, using the boy's vanity? Sounds a bit like Dale Carnegie, to me ;)
Whereas Snape, despite being perhaps only motived by the desire to wound and mock, could have taught Harry a powerful lesson about how being "known", while not yet having done anything to merit renown, is a tricky and precarious position in which to find oneself. Harry, being only 11 an a bit stubborn, allowed his anger and sense of pride to blind him to the potential of that lesson, but I think it still might have served him better, in the end...
| Farsan chapter 19 . 5/11/2010
Let's check if this line of reasoning is sound:
5h) Talks about "pretending to lose", which he learned through a horribly humiliating experience in a martial arts monastery which was wiped out by Lord Voldemort shortly thereafter, except for one student who was a friend of his
2) canon!Quirrell is possessed by Voldemort.
3) It has been repeated within the fic that the Dark Lord has lost his last body but is somehow still alive.
4) The author has summarized the First Law of Fanfiction as "Frodo gets lightsaber, Sauron gets Death Star".
5h & 3 - 6) Voldemort razed the monastery before he lost his body
2 & 3 - 7) Voldemort posessed Quirrel after he lost his body
6 & 7 - 8) Voldemort didn't learn how to lose. Quirrel did, but he is just a drooling zombie when Voldemort is not in charge.
This contradicts the fact that Quirrelmort explained and demonstrated how to lose to Harry, proving that he actually knows how to lose. This means that at least one of the premises, or one of my steps is wrong.
For example, if Quirrel lied in 5h), the contradiction is avoided. He might have posessed Quirrel, infiltrated the monastery and learned its secrets, and afterwards destroyed it. I don't think this is the case, because then anyone who knows about the razing, or investigates about it, might discover that Quirrel was lying, and he seems too smart for that. (After all, Voldemort wasn't supposed to destroy anything after his demise in public, or else people would know he was still alive)
There are several possible explanations, but somehow I favor this one: Everything in Quirrel's story was coherent, but his depart and Voldemort's arrival are too close to be a coincidence: What if Quirrel was already posessed when he entered the monastery, learned everything he could, and then he left it and used his Dark Lord persona to raze it?
This would mean that Quirrel was horcruxed way before Voldemort's death, probably after his mind was destroyed by Cruciatus to ensure he wouldn't fight back, effectively creating a full powered backup for himself, a reasonable strategy for anyone who doesn't want to die nor become powerless if his main body dies.
And if he did it before, he can do it again (Now in Wild Mass Guessing mode)... but he now realizes the drawbacks of using posessed zombies as hosts, and wants a fully aware Wizard for that, who would be willing to accept and follow his ideals. After he accidentally horcruxed Harry, he wants to use this connection to his favor, grooming the perfect Dark Lord. He now just realized that this task is harder than it seemed...
| me chapter 19 . 5/10/2010
Should it be disturbing that I actually *like* Professor Quirrell, even though I know that he's Voldiemort?
| outlawpoet chapter 19 . 5/10/2010
Wow dude. I am surprised and pleased and conflicted about this chapter.
I discovered this fic last week, and reading was increasingly interested and bemused and thinking really hard up to chapter 18, at which point I was appalled, thinking the fic had gone completely off the rails.
This chapter throws it right back into the incredibly well characterized, insightful, isurprising/i look at the underbelly of a Potterverse with resolved governing dynamics and a POV character who's simultaneously living in it, and trying to fit it into the attitude of every kid who sits alone at home and reads the Dungeon Master's Guide.
Keep on shocking me, and I promise to trust you more next time. (And don't forget about the Mirror of Erised, I really want to see what Draco and Harry see in it this time).
| kail chapter 19 . 5/10/2010
WHAT. . !
| fontgoddess chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Quirrell got a bunch of Slytherins beat and humiliate Harry, and got Harry to *thank* him for it. He's got the Dark Lord thing down even better than Dick Cheney.
| jojobevco chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I now doubt who Quirrel is. Is he Quirrel or is he Voldemort, or is he both?
| jdboss1 chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
| Kutta chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
A speculation occured to me: Harry's mysterious dark side is the Voldemort soul shard inside him. However, Voldemort actually LOST that part of impulsive, mindless rage; that is in part why he appears to be much more refined and calm. Also, Quirrelmort knows that Harry is a Horcrux so he's obviously aiming to both protect him and convert him.
However, he does NOT want to have the soul shard back because he thinks he's better off without it - I wonder if he might plan to destroy it along with Harry.
Back then he just walked into the martial arts monastery and beat up everyone in rage. He made up the story about learning to lose. What is the probability that Quirrelmort had the very same lesson years ago which now perfectly suits the purpose of manipulating Harry? Not much, I think. His real lesson of losing was when he "died". Question: is Voldemort being more level-headed solely caused by this lesson of losing or did his soul actually change as part of him got transferred to Harry? Or maybe both?
| MaeSilverpaws1 chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
WOW I never thought I'd say this but.. "I WANT A TEACHER LIKE QUIRELL!" At the least Harry and the trio needed one like him... :0)
| devoted2know chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Bravo, bravo! Very well written, I enjoyed this chapter very much. This lesson Harry learned, while hard, is one I feel that many people who are in positions of power and of leadership should learn to benefit their subordinates; leaders of companies initiating take-overs of other companies, teachers at schools, congressmen and presidents (especially presidents!), as well as military personnel. Perhaps a lesser version for some that they might choose their battles more wisely and thusly be able to benefit their company/constituents longer!
| Psychedelic Sunshine chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Sometimes, as I read your story, I wonder if I'm not going on some sort of acid trip. I completely love it.
I was very excited by the Valdemar reference. I love Quirrelmort - or is Quirrel-Tom or Quirrel 2.0, lord I do not know.
Sometimes this story reminds me of Ender's Game.
| TegwenielWestwind chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
That sort of trial is something many of us need to face at least once in our lives.
| NamuNamu chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I love this story more with every chapter. This was a PAINFUL chapter to read, though- I was almost crying by the end. I don't know what is it about your Harry that makes me emphasize with him so much, but I find him more moving than pretty much any "incarnation" I've read. Can't wait to see the next chapter!
| Harriverse chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I guess this means that Quirell is not Voldy? This was a hard chappie to read and you made it plain that it was difficult for Harry as well.
| malcolm75k chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
So, Harry Potter has been set up masterfully.
Quirellmort and Lucius probably conspired here. Quirell has set up a situation where Draco can become trusted and "in control by appearing to be subservient" by helping Harry Potter control his own anger and need to win issues.
Lucius either actually sent the letter to Draco already, or trusts his son's training enough to take advantage where it is appropriate.
So, the bets are on the table: Harry turns to dark side or is betrayed vs Draco is turned to the light or betrays V's forces.
The hands have been dealt: Harry's cunning, intellect, scientific training and Draco's desire for power vs. Draco's manipulative cunning and crooked dealers (Quirell).
Should be a good game.
| Arkeus chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Very nice work there.
Loving how remembering this is probably Controlled!Quirrel means there should be another layer beyond the obvious.
| Luciun Weasley-Ogg chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
This was a really brilliant chapter i found the idea of "learning to lose" fasinating where did you get it from?
| E.F.Devereaux chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I'm no longer sure if this story is all that good.
You invest way to much maturity in your characters, and its all well and good that you to have made Harry some kind of genius, but you have made almost all of the main characters to be as smart and calculating as him; I think you forget that they really are only eleven.
You seem to think that they have way more life experience and the ability to accept some facts of life which are way beyond the understanding of a first year.
And also, in what world is emotionally abusing a child a just way of teaching them how lose with grace? That is in no way O.K, and even if your Harry is mature beyond his years, this would be emotionally scarring to any child.
Please give a little more thought into the basic biological characteristics of a childs mind. And even in the wizarding world, i like to believe that physical abuse is not a correct way to conduct a lesson.
Apart from all of this, this is an amazing idea with an innovative storyline. You have a wonderful skill, and it is only this last chapter which has me slightly disallusioned. I believe whole-heartedly that you can save this story.
Sorry for the insanely long review, but I do love this story, even if this last chapter is a little harsh in my eyes.
| Common Reviewer chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I thought I'd read everything in Harry Potter fanfiction, but this is new.
| cloudscape chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Offcourse Voldemort wanted Harry to learn to loose. You have to up the stakes when the other partly does it. And Voldemort clearly already believes that in a dominance fight with graduated-Harry he might get seriously injured. So teach the boy to keep the gloves on. When the time comes to take over the world the boy will know to negotiate a deal instead of fighting to the death. And that deal will include getting a good general ( Harry ) and his following ( Draco and all the rest the boy no doubt acuires in the next 7 years).
Let's hope, for Voldemort, Harry learned the original lesson 'humility'. Instead of the one Voldemort himself learned. 'Revence needs to be timed for optimal effect.'
Sad thing is, harry already knows to loose. In the sence of being able to negotiate instead of up the stake more.
He did this when talking to Dumbledore. He could have insisted about Snape leaving, he could have hired tutors. Harry was fine with hiring tutors for the sake of his own education ( it would probebly be better than staying at hogwards.) Than he realised that leaving hogwards would mean being disconnectec with the wizarding world, and thus not being able to learn to understand and influence it. And risking his change to bring the age of enlightement to the wizarding world , was - in the way I read your story - a stake Harry wasn't willing to take. So hew puts up with the mad headmaster, the evil potions professor and the defence teacher who is brilliant but smelly.
I hope Harry realises all this in the next chapter, when he can analyse the situation with a bit of distance and a well rested mind.
Thanks for writing,
| SkittleKick chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
holy crap dude. this chapter threw me through the grinder. Bumping up down left right in some kind of strange elaborate combo for a arcade style fighter game. I certainly didn't foresee where you were taking this. Thanks for the brain-buster. :D
| LockandLoad chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
Holey FCUK ! PossessedSensei!Squirrel's teaching Sun Tzu to Harry !
At this rate, Harry'll not graduate. He'll Graduate a Conqueror General !
Like, like... I don't know, Genghis ? Kubilai ? Caesar ? Alexander, maybe ?
And Quirrel's idea for Draco as Harry's General ? Priceless ! :D
If, PossessedSensei!Squirrel was really possessed by Ye-Oldy-Moldy-Voldy, by far this is the most scary depiction of Dark Lord Voldermort(dude, he even made THE Dark Lord List). Which seriously lacking the scary part in the canon.
BTW, like somebody else been point it out on the interwebz, 'being light does not mean you have to go Gandhi'. More often, a knife stab on the back in the dark can save more lives.
So maybe, to defeat an Evil Dark Lord, a Just Dark Lord is needed.
| cheekylildevil chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
I'm sorry, but this story is going down hill now, it's all about him being evil or not, and that doesn't quite work for me. Also, you changed Quirrel too much, and I don't find myself liking him at all, at least with the original book we pitied him, here I'm sort of neutral, which is never good...
| aeris chapter 19 . 5/9/2010
To me this was a mindblowing chapter. If Voldemort really is behind Quirrel's head, I no longer have any idea of what he might be thinking about, which is delightfully refreshing.
| vighnngaigh chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
this is an intriguing, brilliant, well-written story that is the result of your uniquely convoluted thought process...presents some pretty damn good points, too;)
thank you, and please update soon!
| Mac Ceallach chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This was a very powerful chapter; the lesson was a valuable one that Harry needed to learn, although if the first version was particularly graphic I think I'm grateful for the changes. Although I kind of have to question Quirrell's motivation for arranging it. I now officially have no clue where you are going with Quirrell; I'd assumed that Voldemort was controlling him from afar and that he was a competent teacher mostly because Tom Riddle had wanted the DADA position and would have done well at it. But, either you are changing Quirrell and the possession, or you are changing Voldemort's character, or both, or neither and will take the story in another direction entirely. The uncertainty is refreshing in HP fandom. Thank you.
Also, I now desperately want either Harry or Quirrell to get their hands on the Evil Overlord list. Although, sadly, it wouldn't be written until several years after Philosopher's Stone supposedly takes place.
| uo-chou chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Excellent chapter. I wonder if Lucius is going to do anything about Harry haphazardly throwing his name about previously. I hope that Harry discovers an actual "power he knows not" eventually, I don't like the canon answer to that question. Excellent work with Quirrel's lesson. Keep up the excellent work and thanks for sharing!
| Twisted Miracle chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
wait... "you may not take anything else with you" meaning he left his wand and his crazy "holds the universe and burps" pouch with *quirrel?* eek!
| kura-permanenthiatus chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
It's a gorgeous story and Harry really needed that lesson.
(lack of coherency here is appalling)
| Materia-Blade chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This... chapter made me smile. I have trouble understanding why.
| ByLanternLight chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
The worst part about this is that I have the sneaking suspicion that Voldemort is actually still possessing him somehow and tat he is fully cognizant of what is being said. The best part is that this deals with a flaw you see a lot of in heroes of epics or poorly-written Harry Potter fanfics where everyone is righteously indignant on Harry's behalf from the start and he succeeds in everything he does. 6/5, for an unusual and handy moral.
| TBooki chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
*whistles through teeth*
Bravo! Excellent chapter. I Love your version of Quirrel.
| GenJordan chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Okay, serious squee here for the Valdemar reference there. :
This story is interesting, albeit weird, and I look forward to seeing how it continues.
| the true elec chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That was brutal, but necessary, Harry needed to be taught that lesson because otherwise who knows what would've happened. It wasn't child abuse, Harry is way to mature and smart to be considered a child, he knew the point of the exercise and he learned from it.
| nightDREAMERms chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Aiie. I've been reading some of the reviews from reviewers. And all I can say is eek. And, that some of them need to get out more.
(1) "Child abuse?" There's a difference between abuse, and well... anything else! In that case, any kind of physical spar with non-adults could be considered supervised abuse. There has to be an unwilling partner on one side for something to be called abuse, mental or otherwise.
(2) This is Martial Arts. Yes, I, and probably a third of my peers, have taken classes in this at one point in my life, and INDEED humility is very important. If you don't show respect you do physical labor, and you continue to do it until your instructor tells you not to. If you whine, that's just extra time. (Do people call that abuse of power? No!) Oh btw: I myself, had a Quirell-like experience when I was a green belt. The kid I was sparring got pissed that he was beaten by a girl, so while we were bowing he took it upon myself to sucker punch me. Gosh, I wish he'd gotten a lesson on humility for that.
(3) Some of these reviewers are judging your fanfiction and the world in general through very narrow-minded eyes. The kid's put into a little danger. 'He's only 11!' while my western belief-system does agree this is young, one has to remember to look at the whole picture. This is not the real world. I could list a million things: Legal age is not the same. Age of Responsibility is likely different. Overtly, it's just Fiction- at that, FANFiction. And even SO, IRL: kids are sent on survival quests with nothing but knives in some countries at that age!
Honestly fellow reviewers, if you're going to bash a story. Do it Right.
| Darth Marrs chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I spent a good portion of my day completely enthralled by this story. You have elevated every character to something unique and special, and have blown the genre into a new level. It is humbling as a writer, but bloody brilliant as a reader.
I can't wait to read more.
| blackash chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Apparently a lot of people are giving you a hard time about child abuse. These people forget that:
1. this is a fictional story, not reality
2. this isn't a general statement that "hey abuse teaches life lessons"
3. This was intended for Harry only, not all students - the "Chosen One" is not a part of the general population.
4. Harry really truly needed to be knocked down a peg (regardless of the reason Q might have had, the need was still there)
Anyway, I liked this chapter and thought you handled the situation really well. I didn't read the first version, but this one seemed fine, though I'd be interested in reading the original for comparison...but whatever.
By the way, thank you for not focusing on the HarryHermione relationship right away. They are just 11, after all. They have seven years to fall in love or whatever.
...And your Draco is a fascinating character.
Thank you for the update! I can't wait for tomorrow morning!
| Lacks Gravitas chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I'll admit that I didn't really like your rendition of Harry at first but I've revised my opinion after this chapter. A nice healthy dose of humility is exactly what he needed, and I'm hoping he takes the lesson he learned to heart. It's one thing to know that you aren't perfect, but quite another to actually ADMIT it to other people.
Keep up the good work. Harry might yet make a decent human being.
| The French Dark Lord chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Ouch That must have hurt real bad!
| Troublesome chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Cool, learning to lose was a nice concept. And I hope that now with the time-turner confiscated, I can finally understand what the hell is happening and when.
| Cremello chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Wow! This is really good! It's a bit confusing sometimes when Harry talks about stuff I don't know of at all, but it makes me feel so proud when I do know what he's talking about that I have to laugh at myself... I really like your Harry, the way he thinks and feels, and the way I feel what he feels. You really have talent. Thank you for writing and sharing this and I hope you'll never stop writing!
| Artemis Ignitan chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Well, I've been stalking this fanfiction for a long time. And I have to say that this is easily one of the best alternate universe Harry Potter fictions there is.
It reads like it could be its own story. The way characters are changed in this AU are very well defined, even with their own unique (if not odd and sometimes unreadable) personalities.
But I must say that the best thing that I like about this story is that it isn't predictable. It isn't an AU where everything seems to go perfectly. Even when it seems that there is a gain, there is likely some sort of inevitable loss around the corner. And even with Harry's immense knowledge, changes to him that can easily lead to the Wizarding World as we read it tearing itself into two before devouring the remains (and lead to him being somewhat like a Stu)...he isn't perfect. Things still get to him, and he certainly isn't going to have an easy path to wherever he wants...frankly, sometimes the path divulges so much I find myself forgetting AND doubting what he wants at times.
I salute you for making such an endearing and frankly, mind devouring story. Sometimes it feels like I should re-read the stuff just to make sure I actually understand everything...and I love a story that makes me think. And it's clear that you've done your research, which makes the story all the more interesting to read. I eagerly await the next chapter and finding out what twists you send my way next.
| kara chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
this is my favorite chapter (less calculating harry, more child harry)
the lesson was absolutely monumentous and fantastic
| Darchias chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
You are the MASTER. *bow*
| evelsaint93 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Harry potter is dangerous,Drug him full of Dragon dung flavored jelly beans and he'll shut up
| Dormant Account 24 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Once again this story amazes. There was a very brief moment at the beginning where I feared Harry might become a Harry Stu, but that fear has been completely, thoroughly crushed by the sheer brilliance of this story.
| Scarlet chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Oh, I AM enjoying this story. This was a particularly good chapter. A hard lesson, sure, but fascinating. A reminder that Harry's just a little boy sometimes, and it brings up all sorts of interesting questions about Quirrell's motives. Because it's a lesson the lad seemed to need to learn, for humility, but then again, it cemented his position as Important in front of so many students. I will VERY much enjoy seeing how it all plays out.
That you're spending more time with Quirrell-the-professor is particularly appealing, as that's something I always thought could be a lot more interesting than it was in Philosopher's Stone.
Was also interested by Harry's reaction to the storage cupboard in the previous chapter. Nicely low-key, the way you sort of tucked it in there.
Also. Heh. Khorne :D.
| shenmi meiren chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
quirrell confuses me greatly...
| Speaker-to-Customers chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This chapter read as if you were worried that your Harry was becoming a Mary-Sue and you decided to humiliate him to defuse that potential criticism. Unfortunately all you achieved was to destroy the entire rationale of your story.
What made this story great in the first chapters was the way you highlighted the ridiculousness of Rowling's crap worldbuilding and the flaws of her Wizarding World. Here, however, you show Quirrell, Goyle, and even Voldemort being far too aware of the Muggle world and its superiorities. The humour has vanished completely and so has everything that made the story interesting.
All that remains of your story now is a tale of a brat even more obnoxious than the canon Harry Potter engaging in pointless pissing contests on his way to becoming a Dark Lord. Frankly, I can't be bothered to read it any longer.
| Looney the coon chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
| Sofia Ottoman chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I will be honest and say that I did not like this chapter. It left me cold. I agree that someone needed to teach Harry humility but I didn't agree with the way Quirrell handled it. I was surprised that Hermione didn't speak against it. I await your next chapter with trepidation.
| Kuzosama chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
The reviewer swallowed, throat parched and awe in his breath. His heart pumped a steady bass that beat loud and fast against his breast, and he knew that the past four hours of sleep sacrificed had been well spent.
Deep within, his author senses echoed a resounding approval of the sheer perfection that he had just read. For surely, he had read the lone most awesome fanfic on this site.
Indeed, and he reviews thus as testimony.
(P.S. This was a chore to type out on a phone.)
| thefrayingedge chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I haven't reviewed before but in lieu of the controversy regarding ch 19 I thought I'd put my two cents in :). Yes, if you had intended this as a lesson for society regarding HOW children should be taught how to lose, then it would deserve the criticism. However, I think people forget that this is fanfiction and virtually all kinds of fiction calls for some suspension of disbelief when we read. Even though we are reading from the perspective of an 11 year old child and the message you're trying to deliver is generally intended for people that are not children (at least their intellectual capacities aren't). The criticism that people are giving this chapter is because they're trying to fit it into the reality that they're living when it isn't intended to be an exact replica or even a representation of real life. I honestly really liked reading this chapter though I agree with others that it was extremely hard to read because I do have the habit of empathizing with characters in fiction.
| Meneldur chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Good chapter. I actually liked the harshness. And nice Mercedes Lackey refrence. What did Falconsbane do in our world in your opinion?
| TrowGundam chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
An excellent chapter, not to mention one that didn't hurt my head for a change. The lesson you had is one that I whole heartedly believe in, however I think you forgot one thing, accidental magic. With how overwhelming you have presented Harry's anger thus far he should have caused some accidental magic. As you said in the chapter they have only been in Hogwarts for 5 days, no where near enough time for the students to learn to control their magic. Heck in cannon Harry caused an outburst of accidental magic after two full years of schooling. How would a wet behind the ears first year not result in the same or similar outcome. Other than that one thing I felt was inconsistent I thoroughly enjoyed this chapter. I can't wait to read the next.
| hjcallipygian chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I think you did make a mistake in your removal of the bits of Harry's losing scene, but I don't think you need to put back in what happened. What happened is secondary anyway. What's lost is the feelings Harry has when it's happening - I do not fear losing, not at all, and especially not when I'm really going to come out ahead in the end. (I played baseball; thirty percent success rate being good helps a great deal with that.) The description of what is going on does not resonate with me. However, if you ignore what is happening externally and instead focus on what is going on with Harry in his mind - show us his fear and his struggles and let our emotions sync with his, so we feel his terror and then his elation and then his exhaustion at the end - then you'll have your cake and eat it, too, in regard to the scene. That's how you can get across what you're trying to get across with your Harry there.
At least, that's how I think it should be done. )
| Alex chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
IF YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE TEACHERS ENCOURAGING THE ABUSE OF CHILDREN YOU NEED TO HAVE A WARNING! I can't BELIEVE that someone could write something like this. I sincerely hope that you are put in a circle of people and beaten! You certainly deserve it for thinking that his kind of thing is okay! People like you should be sterilized to keep you from having children that you would, no doubt, abuse since you seem to get off on it so much!
| Jaxtopher chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Incredible. I've only read the edited version, but it didn't seem harsh or jarring at all, and it certainly kept it's effectiveness. Quirrel comes across as very much a Slytherin without being a thug - while Potter seems, well, as influential as the Chosen One should be, while still very much being a flawed and interesting character.
| Hayden Elrics chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
WOW... I don't know how to accurately describe how tingly I'm feeling right now, or how boggled I am at the depth of your story Wrong, the psycho-scientific analysis of harry, the wizarding world, seemingly-crazy dumbles, the mafioso-ish crabbe & goyle (my 2nd top fav characters btw), zombie/awesum quirrel (joint num1 with mr. bronze)... Its almost too much!
Keep it up, and thanks for the mind treats.
| liareh chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I am reviewing after a long time - after the 5th chapter, I had started seriously doubting this fic. Not sure if it was the 5th - the one with Longbottom being bullied on the platform by Harry and the twins. Despite the feeling that the author had actually felt that Harry was doing a favour to Neville and being really smart and that the author changed her tone in the next chapter only after reading disapproving reviews, I decided to give the benefit of doubt. But after this chapter, there are 2 possible high-probability interpretation for me. Other interpretations have a really low probability of being true.
1. The author is really disturbed - she thinks that treating scaring Neville with monsters who gave chocolates would treat him of nightmares and that leaving Harry in the midst of bullies who had already trued to bully him in front of a class and ask him to say that he lost, will help him learn a truly important lesson in life - when to retreat to come back again later and never losing sight of one's aims. If these were truly the authors' thoughts - as in, she truly thought that this would work out even for a couple of minutes, I would say that she should go to a psychologist.
2. This is all manipulation - either Voldemort-Quirell( and I am assuming that she is keeping the original arc in that Quirell is possessed by Voldemort) is actually training Harry to be a Dark Lord and knowing that he has a part of his soul in him, will take him over - use his body later. Since 2 sould wd be residing in the same body , he needs the other brain to be as sharp.
OR, Quirell-Voldemort is just playing it from all sides - he gives Slytherin House its chance for a revenge by subjecting Harry to torture in front of everyone by people who would want it, he lets Malfoy - already a supporter of Dark Lord ( or assumed to be so) off the hook because he doesnot want his supporter to go thru that. He also, perhaps, takes revenge for Snape - and ofcourse, it is also hinting that the Dark Lord himself has just accepted loss for a timeout to prepare himself better. He does all this in a way to keep Harry happy, the supporters happy and suspicion off himself.
Either ways, what was done is NOT teaching in any way.I am sure Draco was not subjected to that treatment to be taught that lesson. It's ridiculous and only a class of 11-yr olds can be expected to accept that.
Finally, about last chapter : I am not sure about your Snape's character. So... he is humiliated and he decides to still stay. WHy not simply say that fine, let Harry stay and let me go. He already has the support of Lucius Malfoy and other still-at-large DEs who wd help him ( out of blackmail if nothing else) to get a job and he has clearly been shown as a highly intelligent person in the books.
Despite being pushed to a situation which he wd hate - namely, to apologise and give up power - Snape accepts this instead of accepting to leave ... If Harry is important in the war, so is Snape. Both of them form the two most pivotal characters in the war. So why does your Snape stay? Either he is really committed to the cause and knows that this is a negligible thing in the face of the bigger picture ( accepting loss because he is aiming to win a much bigger war) or he is ... ( can't really guess the or part - I mean he has power, talent, brains, contacts, knowledge, is hard working - why should he be blackmailed - tell Dumbledore that he could take care of his precious golden boy without him, it was ok. The only reason for Snape to stay in Hogwarts was to protect Harry and Hogwarts. )
ANd finally, "Go into that room - 3rd door) .. scary.
| o0OmondlichtO0o chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Wow, I must say this was a very intensive and exhausting chapter to read.I, as a reader, was really apprehensive after Quirrells announcement of the "losing experience". And if you think, of what Harry must have felt...wow!
This chapter was a very good compensation for the chapter before. You got Harry back to reality. That he is (not yet) the best. That he makes mistakes and has a lot to learn.
On a related note: I think it's good to have a more serious chapter after a funny one, like the last. It's also sort of an compensation...
I am wondering, if Voldemort is really posessing Quirrell. I am actually hoping that thats not the case. He is the adult I like the most in your story so far and I would love to have him around a little longer!
Finally, I want to say that it's really courageous of you to write something that could be viewed as "bullying" and "abuse tolerated and encouraged by a teacher". Thats not an easy issue and practically everyone has a strong opinion about it! I believe there will be people who don't like this chapter because of it. But for me it's a good chapter! A heavy chapter but a necessary chapter! And you wrote it in a way that it was clear from the beginning that it was not meant as "bullying" but as a valuable lesson for life! Harry did agree to it from his own free will and he even got out of it stronger!
I think "to learn how to lose" should be taught al lot more in our society!
Sorry for this long rant! :-)Now I just want to add that you are an excellent writer, that I admire how you bring in science and theory into the wizarding world. And I absolutly love your sense of humur!
| He Who Comes With the Dusk chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This chapter was possibly my favorite. It was not the plot, nor was it ways in which you exposed more about Quirrel/Voldemort's character. It was the fact that, in reading that, I placed myself in Harry's shoes and it hurt me to read, in a similar manner that it must have hurt Harry to experience. This empathetic reaction is not uncommon for me, but I usually only get it when reading *very* good storied with a *very* well developed character.
It's a testament to your skill as a writer that you evoked that from me (from anyone, really, obviously it's not that it was *me* in particular), and as a writer, I respect you more than ever before.
It's also proved to me that your stories are just as good, if not better, without the more... fantastic concepts you've been playing with.
So thanks for the excellent chapter.
| WolfKeeper989 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
| Zeyro chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That as interesting if nothing else, I wonder though. He may have learned to lose but I think that may actually in the long run back fire. Controlled or not, actually having to beg may give him some humility but, I wonder if that won't eventually enforce him to be crueler should he snap? After all this is bound to eventually invoke bad memories or feelings during certain periods/times. I dunno if I said it ell, oh well till, on to the next one.
| emanon chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Please note the header at the top of your story...
Drama/Humor - Harry P. & Hermione G.
So, what happened to the Humor? It seems to have taken a holiday. And haven't seen much of Hermione lately either. Are you too busy trying to elevate Draco into a decent character? This is the same kid who saw nothing wrong with raping 10 year old girls, right?
The whole "learning to lose" scenario is pretty disgusting in my opinion. Child abuse is wrong; to promote it as some sort of life-changing lesson is sick. What happened to the story where a rationale Harry was going to turn the Wizarding world on its ear?
| hentai18ancilla chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This story is astounding, not only because the theory's that Harry spouts are actually true (are you a Physics major, have you studied Quantom theory yet?) but how you managed to make Quirrel, an insignificant character, into a geuine character. That is most laudable, it is no longer a 2-dimensional caricature of Rowlings specter of death. I'm glad Harry is a bookworm, I assume you are one as well, I hope to see what path Harry wanders off in his machinations but he is right not to wholly trust Dumbledore, and yet there is much to gain there. For Dumbledore wants him to keep Harry off turned and was (still is actually) withholding important information for him. What is left to see is what Harry will do since he is clearly not a pawn.
| JMLuna chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Okay, I'm completely confused at what Tom is trying to do with Harry. Are you trying to redeem him? Because he seems to be teaching Harry valuable lessons he shouldn't if he wants to win over him in the future. Unless he just doesn't want his position as Dark Lord usurped.
| Ankalagon chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Dude Q is V right? Right? Just tell me.
Also this was strangely Starcraft II Beta Panda TM approves of this chapter.
| Myeyesburn chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Were we supposed to learn something from this chapter? All I got out of it, was that teachers are apparently free to either abuse children or have them abused by others. You must have went to a nice school.
| DarkHeart81 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
While reading this I kept imagining Harry snapping and retaliating against those attacking him, perhaps to the point of putting one or two of the in the hospital wing for a bit. I wonder how Harry will react when he learns the truth about Quirrell.
| themysterioustickingnoise chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This chapter was rather intense and I am seriously contemplating the advanteges of losing. Hmm...
And I wonder wether the website of also contains everything that Quirrel knows :O
Keep up the great work.
| dead feather chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I understand Harry's exhaustion. I feel it as well.
This is an intriguing read but so damn heavy that it takes a lot out of the enjoyment. Also I've noticed that Harry's attitude and intelligence is not so fun when everyone else is beginning to be alike.
:) Perhaps I return to this once Harry gets to a place where he can actually do things, instead of mislearning them all the time.
I so wanted him to leave Hogwarts and the pretentious atmosphere behind. Tutors would suit him better.
| cap red chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I have to say, that having not read the original version, I thought that the impact was plenty enough. Including (was it spitting?) would take it a little too far, I think. As it happened we were brought through a roller coaster ride of emotions and the lesson that was learnt from it was amazing. I do agree with some readers comments that it is not realistic for an 11 year old to react to that lesson in that way, but then your character is not realistic and so it fits in within the realm of the story.
I am heartily enjoying this fic, and think that it is possibly one of the most well thought out, clever (my highest compliment) and original fics on the website. At times I have had my doubts about where it was going, but as you promised, everything seemed to make sense in the end.
I am looking forward to the next chapter, in particular the developing friendship with Draco - something you have managed to achieve without negating the characters flaws.
Well done and keep up the excellent writing.
| Allen Pitt chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
hm..one wonders if Voldemort really learned the lesson back when; learned at the school then left & came back & killed all of them. Not sure he grasped the lesson entirely, hm.
I assume he's trying to set HP as a potential Dark Lord in the eyes of the student body, and maybe even in reality. Or, he's just having fun. Who knows. Much better than the stuff he did in book 1
| Krptonite124 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Congratulations, yours is one of the very rare fanfics which truly are a work of art and a really interesting read. The way which you narrate and the plotline is simply captivating and the idea that a past dark lord is teaching the future one(even though its some kind of manipulation) is an amazing idea. I eagerly await for the next chapter.
| MKofGod chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
It's not often that someone writes a chapter that is, literally, difficult for me to read because of content, not quality. But you've succeeded. Well done. You have sucessfully made me wince for a worthwhile cause.
After the whole dibacle with Dumbledore - funny, but a little too Parody-like for me to enjoy - I was feeling a little disillusioned witht this story. I thought that this story might be entering the fatal flaw state, where a story loses itself for cheap humor and gratification (forgive me). I have never been so happy or relieved to be wrong.
I cringed for Harry, even as I understood the lesson he had to learn. I cheered for him, even as I winced in near disgust and pity at his humbled form.
And that, I think, shows your talent most of all - I actually felt disgust for a fictional character, disgust for the HERO, at that. I PITIED one, I sympathized with him, applauded his guts, and left feeling like I - I MYSELF - had learned a lesson. I re-evaluated my perspective on his actions, and really, really appreciated your view on what he REALLY won or lost in the great scheme of things. I realized that my perspectives on a good story, or even a good person, had become twisted by the fandom, the Dark Harrys, the Powerful-Harrys, and the rebellious Harrys, that are so applauded. I realized that my view on what should be done in certain situations was twisted by the common desire for vengence - to humilate an opponent, to crush and defeat him, even at the cost of dignity or RIGHT.
If I could, I'd give you a standing ovation. Overall, you write solid logic, which is wonderful and much needed everywhere (the old adage that common sense just ain't that common), and you write a beautifully flawed character who has enough redeeming qualities to be likable. But most importantly, I think, is your story becomes a worthwhile read when you teach Harry something that actually affects people outside the fandom, in the real world.
Anyway - enough about that. I laughed, I cringed, I rolled my eyes, and I fell in love with your story again. I loved Harry's talk with McGonnagal (both of them), and I love your Harry-Draco interactions. Oh, and you have successfully made me like Quirrel. (Maaan - I really hope/wish he's not Voldmort.)And I love, love, love the twisted logic that permates the entire story. I can't wait to see what you write next! Thank you for a great adventure with mindbending twists!
| Me chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I am disappointed that you would cave into reviewer's freak outs and change your chapter. This is YOUR story - do what you want with it no matter what anyone says.
Also, reading some of the other reviews, I am now not sure how to interpret this chapter. Others seem to interpret it that Quirrell was genuinely trying to teach Harry some deepo lesson that he, in my opinion, does not need to learn in such a setting. I interpreted it to mean that Quirrell/Voldemort is manipulating Harry somehow to do something i.e. QV is doing something evil - I have an inkling of what but I cannot put it in words right now. I hope my interpretation is correct because it just makes more sense, in fact, I will stick to my interpretation until such a time that it is proven incorrect, at which point I will be royally pissed.
| novalis chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I vote for putting back the harshness, even though I did not read the version with.
This is somewhat lacking in impact. I think the central thing is: I didn't believe that Harry lost. I'm not sure that, even if his treatment were harsher, I would believe that, given the context. But I definitely don't now.
| DoubleC chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Quirrel creeps the living daylights out of me.
All the kids are prodigies, Quirrel is some evil mastermind too clever for whatever, who's teaching this sort of stuff to those same eleven year old prodigies. I lack socially acceptable commentary. She s**t is getting more real every time. Daaaark.
| Kutta chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I'm roughly indifferent as to the two versions. If I were you I'd probably stick to the spitless one to soothe prudish readers a bit.
However, just ignoring naysayers who either complain because of an "ethical revulsion" or complain but don't give any sufficiently sophisticated explanation is also a defensible stance, I think. There is a chance that a great portion of your readers will come after you've finished this fanfic, in which case it's advisable to just focus on your ideas and try keeping an integrity. Historically speaking, pruderie and superficial (hypocritical?) yuck reactions are uncorrelated with overall quality and significance of a work.
| tick-toc-tick chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I really disagree with this whole chapter. Quirrell lost Harry tons of power over the student body and due to who Harry is the only really conclusion I can see from this action a massive increase in the chance someone is willing to take a shot at him hurting or killing him.
I also really hate that you had Harry come to a conclusion that McGonagall was right. To my mind the character you have created is very much an "end justify the mean" kind of guy no a "all actions have consequences" kind of person like McGonagall.
| Raven3182 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Another good chapter, although it seems lately that much of the comedy has left the story, I hope some of that returns soon. I also hope that we see more of Hermione in the future; she's my favorite character and she should get along with this Harry very well. Anyways, I look forward to tomorrow's update. Thanks for writing!
| NihilCredo chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Despite checking this story for updates approximately six times a day, flattery comes very unnaturally to me, hence I had never desired to post a review before. But the feedback to this chapter - and the value you appear to place on it - compelled me to register and break a lance on your behalf.
Yes, doing what Quirrell did to an eleven-year-old would be foolish and harmful. Learning to lose in that fashion is unquestionably a lesson for mature minds, and any teacher trying that in the real world would find his attempt backfiring and, one hopes, his career ending. In the real world, with real eleven-year-olds, Kneazle's impulsive reaction and assessment would be appropriate.
Howeve, _this is not a story about real eleven-year-olds_, not the kind you or I are familiar with. Eliezer has gone to quite some lengths to make the Hogwarts freshmen appear realistic - giving them petty desires, bouts of foot-stomping, some instincts of conformity. But there's a freaking chasm between appearing realistic and _being_ realistic.
I used to hang out with some fairly elite circles around Harry's age - boys and girls among the smartest and most disciplined of their generation in my home country, most of whom now are well on their way to the top of their chosen fields. If put in the HP universe, I believe that many of them could have beaten Hermione on pretty much any field; some could have sparred with Draco; and not a single one of them could have accomplished a tenth of the mental feats Harry is capable of.
Performing rational thought *on the spot* to the degree Eliezer is espousing is a massive challenge for any adult. Having a pre-teen protagonist (raised by smart, but not rationalist, parents!) capable of thinking that way 24/7 is a break from realism almost as serious as the existence of magic itself. Losing control once a day or so isn't nearly enough to bring his character into the realm of plausibility.
It may sound like I'm bashing Eliezer with the above - far from it. The premise being unrealistic is not a significant flaw; it matters much more than it is an interesting, original, entertaining, and meaningful premise.
Even more importantly, the premise must be followed throughout the entire world. And in a world where there are eleven-year-olds trained from birth to be Machiavelli or Seianus and it's considered _normal_; in a world where an eleven-year-old knows almost everything a thirty-one-year-old academic does, and applies it with all the discipline said academic _wishes_ he could; in a world where the fate of civilisation hangs upon the students of an institute of late-primary/early-secondary education...
...in such a world, Pai Mei himself would not be a wrong choice as a middle-school teacher. Different children, different needs.
PS: Keep writing or I'll destroy everything you ever loved.
| Luingar chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I've just read the entire series from chapter 1 to chapter 19, and you seem to have written out what many kids, and likely adults as well, daydream about.
"if [i]I[/i] was the hero, i would..."
very well done. it's excellent. I have not words for how totally fucking awesome this story is.
on second thought, "totally fucking awesome" covers it pretty well
| wolf550e chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
What is Voldemort's game, ruining Voldemort's reputation and making Harry stronger?
| Lady Dragonryder chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Very very awesome. I find myself liking this Quirrel more and more and more. And Draco is rather likable as well, surprisingly enough. Can't wait to see more of the story!
| ejhawman chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Could not properly read this chapter. Too tough emotionally for me.
I have my doubts about the method. Might work for some; would it work for Ravenclaw!Harry?
An disturbing idea: maybe Uncle Vernon in canon was actually GOOD for something? Setting a tone of constant oppression in Harry's life gave him this lesson constantly.
The chapter title, however, fits. It's a very Slytherin lesson to learn: not that you won't win every battle, but that there is a right way to reacting to loss. The true bully just keeps escalating until he wins or dies. The subtle hero learns to cut his losses, regroup, and prepare for the next round - with a better idea of what his enemy will do, and a determination to bring overwhelming force to win on the first punch.
Harry needs to learn tactical discipline and strategic thinking.
Btw: wonder if you're going to get a new surge of readers from David Brin's linking the this story in a Daily Kos diary.
| Ryu Kasai chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This... is brilliant.
I've been reading harry potter fan fiction for several years, and it's rare that I come across a story which is both innovative and unpredictable. Yes, I've read prodigy Harry stories before, but none that have alternately made me squeal with glee, stop and think, and actually wonder about the motivations of the characters. I love your manifestation of Quirrel. He, and the others, are multi dimensional, and I'm terribly excited to find out the whys and wherefores of his actions.
| xyvortex chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Okay... has Voldemort gained some perspective somehow by posessing Quirrell? The man actually sounds like he's transformed somehow since his defeat at Godric's Hollow... He's actually TEACHING useful things to his enemy! (or is he working on making an ally?)
| Nobody chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Hiya I've loved your story so far as some of the ideas you have introduced in this is refreshing as I've never seen them in another fanfic before, however I do not think that I can agree with you on the method used to teach Harry about when to accept defeat.
I can understand the need for this lesson, especially for the protagonist in any story as they could not possibly win every battle; if they win every battle, there would be no point in the story as there would not be any conflict for the protagonist to solve. However the way in which you used older Slytherin students to publically humuliate and shame Harry in front of his peers seems a little extreme as not everyone would be able to grasp the concept behind it and in most situations, the children would see this as encouragement from authority to knock down the Great Harry Potter and I would not be surprised if the behaviors continues outside of class.
The technique used should be used on an older audiences where they have outgrown things like immaturaty, pettiness and revenge. Children would not be able to distinguish between the lesson and bullying as this is what it will seem like. Lif will naturally teach them to accept defeat as not everything will go your way.
I hope that I managed to get my point across as I can't seem to figure out how to put this across in my head, hopefully it sounds better to you than it did to me. Lol.
Anyways hope you keep up the good works and I'm eagerly waiting for you next update.
| KrisTerms chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This makes me feel gross inside.
But that just means that it's great writing.
| SensiblyTainted chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Wow! I can't believe Harry maintained control! I was so proud of him. Having been in a circle of bullies myself, I can tell you it is NOT pleasant and had I the power, I'm not sure I could have refrained from at least running away. Sick and dizzy is the least of it. Even if they don't touch you. There is a primal part of you that just panics to being outnumbered and psychologically you think of everything they could do to you, so even if you don't you feel as if they kinda had.
Okay. Breathe. I think this is a great story because Harry isn't some pristine charcter. He is flawed, but his true triumph is his trying to overcome that flaw.
It's so weird to read your charcters sometimes. They are just so dynamic. Draco is the same boy who would rape Luna, but here he's a potential hero/ally. It shows how everyone is made up of good and bad qualities.
Really. You are a fantastic writer! Please never stop!
| Nobody chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Hiya I've loved your story so far as some of the ideas you have introduced in this is refreshing as I've never seen them in another fanfic before, however I do not think that I can agree with you on the method used to teach Harry about when to accept defeat.
I can understand the need for this lesson, especially for the protagonist in any story as they could not possibly win every battle; if they win every battle, there would be no point in the story as there would not be any conflict for the protagonist to solve. However the way in which you used older Slytherin students to publically humuliate and shame Harry in front of his peers seems a little extreme as not everyone would be able to grasp the concept behind it and in most situations, the children would see this as encouragement from authority to knock down the Great Harry Potter and I would not be surprised if the behaviors continues outside of class.
The technique used should be used on an older audiences where they have outgrown things like immaturaty, pettiness and revenge. Children would not be able to distinguish between the lesson and bullying as this is what it will seem like. Lif will naturally teach them to accept defeat as not everything will go your way.
I hope that I managed to get my point across as I can't seem to figure out how to put this across in my head, hopefully it sounds better to you than it did to me. Lol.
Anyways hope you keep up the good works and I'm eagerly waiting for you next update.
| Katamabob chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Certainly interesting. It probably is very important to learn how to lose, but I know I never could. I don't like the idea of Harry allowing dominance to be shown over him, although it probably is the more sensible option...
Good chapter _
| tamahome8 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I don't like this chapter at all...sorry.
There's something wrong in teaching prepubescent boys about a life changing lesson such as learning to lose...
And the setting feels kinda inappropriate...
| morriganscrow chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Very, VERY interesting chapter. Much to think on; looking forward to next update.
| Enelen chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I only read the edited version, and it still hit hard. I don't know about the original.
You are making Quirrell out to be the most lovable character in this fic: so is he Quirrell or is he Voldemort? I'm guessing Voldie, because everything is hinting on that, but then he's not a stupid Dark Lord like Rowling's and he's not out after Harry's blood either, more like his allegiance. I realize it's my Tom/Harry fangirling talking here, but while I like reading good adventure type stories where they are hunting each other, I shudder to think of these two as enemies... but then that would be like RL: not everything is black and white.
Also, this was the first chapter that wasn't sending me into laughing fits, are things starting to turn serious, or was it just to show Harry his proper space?
| kitiem3000 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That's one heavy lesson. Very nicely written. I could feel Harry's panic.
| wsbenge chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This chapter stunned me. Quirrel is not going to be canon fodder, and several important facts of life were discussed, especially canon Harry's temper.
| LockandLoad chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This is scary.
Am I correct to assume this is a training for Sun Tzu's Art of War(which is still part of the so called Martial Art) ?
Looks like, this Sensei!Squirrel is grooming Harry not just to graduate, but to graduate as an effective War General.
Because the way I see it, what Sensei!Squirrel thought Harry by 'Learning to Loose' is the usual practice for a Nation Leader or Commander. I.e. send a small group of recon troops. It's okay if they all get smooshed, as long as they get the recon report. Or turn a blind eye against your own people get unjustly jailed and tortured in some country, as long as your nation can keep their important resource trade treaty with said country.
Yes, it is, in the end, about control. But, giving the lesson a plaque as 'Learning to Loose' is not that far from the truth either.
BTW, if this was the Voldermort attitude in canon, we might get a very hard to defeat(and beneficient ?) Dark Lord. And probably you'll get dental by joining the Deatheater.
I mean, the guy even make a list of things an evil Over Lord should not do. :D
| Cubist chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Hmmm. Comparing the current "learning to lose" scene with the original... I'd say the current version does the learn-to-lose job just as well as the original, and it shouldn't squick the reader out anywhere near as much. The question is, just how badly did you *want* to squick the reader out?
| Unlisted but Interested chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Sometimes the way your mind works frightens me.
I love the story you are writing but at times (especially in this chapter) I have to stop a moment and brace myself for whatever is coming next. The way you wrote the 'Losing Lesson' sent chills down my spine. I think I was almost as scared as Harry was to go through with that.
And I know you aren't going to answer me yet, but I have to ask so I can get it off my mind. What is up with Quirrell? So far as I can tell he hasn't even acknowledged that anybody exists outside of his classroom. And why is he singling Harry out like that? He seems determined to change Harry somehow, but why? It's driving me crazy.
Terrified of the next chapter, but still can't wait. Thanks for a fantastic read so far.
| PBrules chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That a bit uncomfortable to read but takes your story to a deeper level I think. Instead of Harry just running round reacting to situations he is now being forced to *really* consider his actions. Can't wait for your next chapter. You certainly know how to keep producing the unexpected!
| Grim Sinistre chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Your story made my head hurt...
| degustaciones chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
You're going to rewrite this? But why? That's damn brilliant of Quirrell, I think. Quirrell's teaching Harry self-control, AND convincing him that Quirrell's an ally, AND manipulating Harry to come around to his pont of view, AND setting Harry above his yearmates-he's no longer merely equal. He's grooming Harry in a beautiful sort of way, doing what Malfoy's doing-earning trust and friendship-whilst showing him that some people are ginormous twats and teaching him how to rule. If there's a better way to get someone to transcend into being a Dark Lord, I don't know it.
And I suppose it's also an object lesson to the Slytherins, THIS is how you win allies, THIS is how you win loyalty. Pretty damn fantastic overall.
| Jarno chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This is the first chapter in your whole stroy, which I do love, that I didn't like at all.
I don't really understand what you meant by teaching you to lose, however that has nothing to do at all with martial arts. Martial arts teach you control and to win. Backing down safely from a fight you can not win, so you can take him on another day is not losing.
Harry taking on Snape was smart. Harry has no way of knowing the future, he can not know which influence he might have the coming years. He does however know that at that time, his influence was very high. Prodigal boy-who-lived returning to the magical world. If he though he could win, than taking on Snape at that time was the best option.
The idea of 'losing' in martial arts, or at least that which comes closest to is would be when someone for example draws a knife on you. You pretend to be scared, to be submissive and at the moment their attention lowers you break their arm. That is control, not losing.
| potterinu chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I got halfway through and then just didn't want to read anymore. i am posting this before reading it in an effort to put off reading it. I went and read a bunch of review for the chapter before posting this too. I just don't want to see what you appanrently have in store for him here.
| Lord Dragon Claw chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That was an unexpected and interesting lesson plan.
I wonder if... if Quirrel is not possessed by ol' Tom.
The chapter as a whole? Very enjoyable and thought-provoking.
| nth-x chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I think that I can see the point of Harry's experience here, and I liked the analogy/explanation of the dominance battle. In the last chapter, Harry certainly won, but he did so by pulling out all the stops, when the "cunning", "slytherin", method would have been to take the early loss and return to the war from a position of strength. Perhaps this is something Harry would have learned if he'd gone to Slytherin, and Quirrel was trying to deliver it to Harry even in his chosen Ravenclaw?
I am, as are some of your other reviewers, confused about Quirrel. By his actions, he seems to be actively possessed. However, I don't associate most of his actions with what we have seen of Voldemort. I suppose that if you have a rationalist and thus more powerful Harry, maybe Voldemort is similarly enhanced? Can you confirm for us if he is actually Quirrelmort, or if he is just Quirrel himself? Albeit with some odd mannerisms.
Finally, I also want to echo some of your reviewers in the concern that you have not revealed a greater plot. I love every installment in itself, but I don't see where the larger story is going. Is this a tale of Harry fighting his own dark impulses? If so, I suppose I'd like to see a better explanation of where those dark impulses are coming from: rationality and precociousness don't exactly scream evil to me. Is the story rather one of Prometheus bringing fire to humanity? If so, I guess I'd like to see more of Harry's impact on magic/wizardry, rather than its impact on him. Is the story going to be his reaction to some force other than those we've already seen? If so, I'd obviously like to be introduced to that force, so we have an idea of where the story is heading. While I love the execution, I'm a little concerned about the (seeming lack of) method to your madness.
I remain your devoted fan, even if I have some faint misgivings. After 3300 reviews, whatever you're doing is obviously working, so please continue. Thanks for writing!
| Baughn chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I'm.. honestly not sure how to feel about this. But it's given me a lot of things to think about when writing my own stories; for that, thank you.
| Kneazle chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
And... that's it. You've lost me as a reader. As a teacher in Britain currently, I can tell you what you did in this chapter is entirely illegal and disgusting.
I thoroughly enjoyed the earlier chapters, but I too am at a loss of what exactly is going on here? It started out as a great comedy with Harry discovering the magical world and now it's just a mess of "let's kick Harry when he's down." Why is he being picked on? He was entirely within his rights to tell Snape to back off for his blatant bullying, or at the least, to walk out of the classroom if he felt the environment was unsafe. By then, parents would be involved and alerted to the situation and a conference would begin where Snape would be either suspended or fired from his position.
For Quirrell (either as an agent of Voldemort's or not), to treat Harry like that, is another form of bullying. He is being singled out in class. Maybe if that was an extra curricular where he could spend the time knowing how to fight - as in a dojo - a teacher could get away with teaching him to lose. However, considered one could assume that there is curriculum involved set by the Governors and the Ministry, what Quirrell is doing here is nothing but child abuse.
What's happened? Your story is not at all what it started out as and I sincerely believe you have no plan. Tighten it up and start explaining things, or things will begin to slip - I might not be the best to talk about starting stories without an idea of an end, but at the least I can recognise my mistake. I suggest taking some time to reread what you wrote and think about if you would really put an 11-year-old, a tiny, precious, chatty child that only seeks your attention and to tell you about them and learn from you, as Year 7s are, in a situation like with Quirrell?
I'll see what happens next chapter before fully abandoning. Impress me.
| Heidinanookie chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
What would you want to edit in the last chapter? Can you please tell me this so I can decide if I'd like a new version even better then the current one?
uhm, I seem to have forgotten all about Harry's confrontation with Goyle... I'll have to read up on that.
As for his lesson: I hope he really retains its content. It would do him a world of good; Quirrel/Voldemort's right about that. What I don't understand is why Voldy would consent to strengthening his enemy. That's exactly one of this stupid, arrogant things he said were mistakes of former Dark Lords.
I can't imagine how this is going to play out but I hope you'll enlighten us soon...
| MatsumotoXD chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Wow. I was quivering with excitement through the whole spitting contest. Incredible! Could it be that Voldemort is trying to mould Harry into someone who would be inclined to join him in the future?
Awesome chapter. Just awesome. Keep them coming. xD
| firedraygon chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This was pretty interesting, the trial Harry has to go through. I'm so curious as to how Quirrell will play into all of this. Draco's attempts at befriending Harry are amusing, too. Lovely chapter, please write more soon!
| MisterTabi chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Very nice bit about human nature there. A bit extreme but very tasteful for intellects.
| Thekilleregglord chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
This was tremendously fun and well written, one of the more compelling scenes of fanfiction I can remember, but it makes absolutely no sense in context, total fridge logic here.
I don't care, it is to much fun and I enjoy it a great deal more then I enjoyed Brothers Karamozov.
Your Quirel is awesome in a way I would expect Dumbledore to be. Usually the trope is Voldemort is the strong one and Dumbledore holds him off by skill and brains, it feels like you are inverting everything here. Also DarkHarry is so beautifully done here, how clear things become and how compelling stuff seems.
Note, intentionally or not, this chapter you graduated Voldemort from very evil and powerful wizard who threatens Britain to very evil and powerful wizard who threatens the whole world, what with the Asia trip and all.
Also Harry God Emperor of Man from 40k in the future would be awesome beyond belief.
| dougal74 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I confused, what is happening with Hermione? She barely features anymore...and after there innitial meeting on the train I thought she was going to be playing a major role.
That chapter was very wrong, legalised bullying and abuse carried out by peers on first years, it's sick.
Is this story heading anywhere? It's already as long as the original PS, yet you are barely a week into his studies and no underlying plots have become apparent.
| Celestial Moonwalker chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
The end was kind of amusing.
And the lesson was rather essential. Even if V is trying to make Harry seem to be wanting to become a Dark Lord.
| erickmenk chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Losing. I find the lesson brutal and yet magnificent in your portrayal. This chapter is one of the more inspiringly intellectual pieces of writing I've read. Hope to hear more of it.
| TardisIsTheOnlyWayToTravel chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
WOW! *amazed expression*
Can I say that, whatever his motives may be, I am glad that SOMEONE at least (besides Professor McGonagall, who tries, but doesn't understand Harry at all) is trying to help Harry?
| NATWEST chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
i can now say i just don't understand this. I really want to but i just don't. I understand this is au did you lose the plot in the early chapters. I really think you did. Why did harry want goyle to go away. You did not explain that?
| Zicou chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
wow awesome chapter!
| hi chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
wow that was intense. Couldn't help feeling for harry even though he consented to it. Quirrel is magnificent.
| planeteer-rach chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
Wow. Ok. SO my mind is still boggling over the whole Quirrelmort thing... who exactly is doing the teaching?
Voldie wanted to be a dark lord (obviously!), and a teacher. One of them learnt at the dojo, voldie want (more?) lessons, but also wreaked the vengeance Quirrel said you should/could after pretending to lose...
Seriously, I think the guy, whoever he is, is a psycopath. But having said that, I almst like him. Which unnerves me, since he could be a voldemort controlled Quirrel, rather than the inhabited one in canon.
Anyway! Love Draco! Thought Hermione was maybe slightly out of character in that she didn't say anything, and she spoke up in potions... But perhaps we'll hear her reactions/thoughts next chapter?
Anyway, love the chapter, and the story (esp Harry's regard for McGonagall) and hope you update again soon.
| csad21 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I had thought that Quirrell was possessed by Voldemort, just like in canon, but this chapter, with the dojo story has me confused. Because I don't think he was lying on that account. Why lie in general when you can achieve your ends with selected bits of truth as well? Manipulation really is a fine art form, and I fully agree that a lesson in humility is something every strong/powerful person has to learn. And Quirrell's method to achieve that sounds legitimate to me in that mysterious martial arts lessons way. Not that I know much about martial arts.
I cannot blame the children for being fascinated by Quirrell. *This* Quirrell is easily the best teacher in Hogwarts, exactly the type of teacher Hogwarts and the Wizarding World needs. And somehow, I hope this *is* Voldemort, simply because it would imply that he'd learned his lesson the first time around and has wised up. It would be something to see, as a smart!less-violent!Voldemort is by far as rare as he's seldom, and therefore a treat. Quite frankly, the canon!Voldemort was extremely pathetic and did everything not to do on the List of "Evil Overlord".
Also, the Draco - Harry interaction in this chapter? Very nice. Especially the part of Harry that now considers him a valuable ally. I loved how Quirrell called him the general to Harry's Dark Lord.
Wonder what House Slytherin's response is going to be to Harry's courting them?
Now I'm really eagerly awaiting the next chapter.
| AngelForm chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
That, was inspired.
| tatewaki2000 chapter 19 . 5/8/2010
I'm so lost. I-I don't know how to feel.
A part of me hates this chapter, yet I don't...
It's like seeing a train wreck...and then every one cheers and cries in happiness as the see the massacre of limbs.
Yes. It's unexpected. But it's disturbing.
| phoebe turner chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
| Julian Morrison chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I think your Harry might have learned the lesson thoroughly in abstract just from being told it - but he'd have had to take the emotional hit at some point, and controlled circumstances minimize the shock. I find myself intrigued by this story's Voldemort/Quirrell. It's pretty obvious he and Harry are in a battle of mutual optimization, both trying not to destroy but to turn the other, even if Harry doesn't know it yet. An interesting twist! And I like how he's subtly pulling Slytherin away from chaotic evil towards lawful neutral. A pleasure to read. Please continue.
| XAvAX chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I very much like that Quirrell is a Mercedes Lackey fan. And it's so _true_ that Mornelithe/Ma'ar/Leareth/et al. might have succeeded if he/they had learned who not to provoke.
| Xuenay chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Good chapter. I especially like the relationship that's developing between Harry and Draco, and the way Draco is making Harry like him even though Harry *knows* it's not fully honest. That's the way emotions work. I'd love to see more of their scheming, and how things develop. It's also intriguing to wait and see how Harry's dark side will develop.
(Things are probably also helped by the fact that Harry/Draco is the only pairing I think is worth even thinking about. Ahem.)
| anon chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I don't really know if this is just insane writing or there's legitimate undercurrents of story going on that are implied - like the concept that Quirrel is actually being CONTROLLED by Voldemort, and is screwing with Harry as much as possible: regardless of Harry's capabilities, Voldemort has years of experience and is just as, if not more, skilled.
I can really see how this is turning off readers who're taking this at face value.
I still find it incredibly disturbing that this type of class can go on (or will it? It's still early in the year) and someone like McGonagall can ignore it, even with the urgent need for a teacher.
It's slightly disturbing seeing children at age 11 being subjected to this type of teaching, but if they're learning how to perform magic and have the type of responsibility glossed over in canon,... gah. Still leaning on the Voldemort trying to make Harry insane and twisted.
| pazed chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
What an extraordinary scene.
I don't have a clear response to it but I do know it was very well done ...
| Von chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Wow, this was a NASTY chapter!
You've had all of Harry's successes be balanced by personal humiliation so far, so I guess I shouldn't be surprised.. but wow this was nasty.
I think I'm just going to stop reading those bits. :D They're functional for the purpose of helping Harry's slightly malformed personality get better but watching Harry get manipulated into agreeing was horrible. I suspect I see too much of myself in him - none of his brilliance, of course, just that stupid inability to back down. I would have failed that test when I did my level best to kill everyone involved.
I hope that Harry can start having victories soon which DON'T involve immediate slap-downs.. they're depressing.. :P :D
| enderverse chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Really creepy to teach preteens that its ok to spit on people and push them around as long as an authority figure says its ok.
| Thenchick chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
i dont like quirell
i do however like how tey think because he snapped he made snape apologize
| FuzzyBoots chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
That was nothing that I had expected. Interesting. I am really liking the current Quirrell. _ Makes me really hope that he isn't after all, controlled by Voldemort, although I'm sure that I will be disappointed. Heck, I could even see him as being evil, the kind of smart evil that he claims most Dark Lords lack. And, as a side note, I'm impressed that you have Goyle knowing martial arts. Usually, Crabbe and Goyle gain little characterization besides "dumb muscle" and "lickspittles to Malfoy". You are showing other sides to them. Och... anyhow, just want to say that I like the chapter dearly and I cannot find any good criticisms to level in the face of it.
| SomeGuyFawkes chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Interesting game Quirrell is playing, and you're still keeping us guessing about his motives. At least you specified that he's turban-less.
Good chapter; thanks for the update.
| uiramatos chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
This chapter was deep, "to win, you must learn to lose". It is an important lesson.
Amazing chapter, in some ways, the best one to date.
thank you for your time.
| Me chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Quirrell is right, Harry is an idiot. An idiot for believing that the aforementioned Quirrell is actually trying to help him in some way.
The Harry and Draco interaction was very good and realistic. But the second half of the chapter with the defense lesson was annoying. Ironic how Harry throws a fit when Snape taunts him, yet accepts it when Quirrell completely humiliates him. Well, as I said, Harry is an idiot.
| Zollercoaster chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
That was awesome! As always, I enjoy the emotional intensity of this story.
| dexterZ chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
disturbing is one word that comes to my mind when i read this chapter. it was somewhat readable at the start but as the chapter progressed it just kept going downhill..lets see if it gets better. harry is a kid, who will act out impulsively as kids should..the whole episode with quirrel is akin to some kind of nonsensical jedi training or some sh!t. going dark is not bad...becoming evil is. dark and evil are not the same :
| hp4eva chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I have to say i dont like this chapter at all, no child of 11 years old no matter how mature could have that happen to them without causing psychological problems for the rest of their life. This story in the last few chapters has gone far to dark to be enjoyable. Personally I think that lesson is child abuse of the worst sort.
| Resurgam-Csillaga chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
This chapter kind of filled me with a bit of hate sure you don't always win in life but for a young child to learn that is okay, not so much in front of his peers. Tho I'm loving your Professor Quirrell persona it's really a roller coaster to read this. Overall tho great job you can write a book and I'm sure you'd be hated/scorned but loved for your writing style.
| skowler chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
During the reading of this chapter, I found myself feeling an entirely unaccustomed rage. I think that if I had a child, and that child was treated the way Harry was in this chapter, I might very well commit murder.
I read fanfiction for entertainment, and this chapter, as well as much of the preceeding few chapters, have ceased to be entertaining.
I wish you the best, but I will not be continueing the journey with you. I am cancelling the story alert.
| MogtheGnome chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
This story gets more and more painful to read as it goes on, as Harry switches from handling things intelligently to believing retarded tripe just from who he's talking to.
One of the most ridiculous errors that most fanfic writers fail at is remembering how exactly children act at certain ages, and instead turn them all into little adults no matter what.
Yes, your Harry specifically IS more adult, but he's also a paranoid lunatic of a child who believes far too much in theoretical scientific philosophies.
There is no way that he, being who you have presented him to be, would react as is in this chapter. Moreover, there are very few children who COULD handle the kind of lesson you have Quirrel dishing out. This is the kind of mental scarring event that would fuck up a normal kid for years.
For a kid like Harry? Even worse.
| Sarah chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I'm not too sure what to think of this chapter. Don't like the way you decided to teach that lesson to Harry. And it's going to be interesting to see how the villains unravel.
| stickzx chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Alright, that chapter definitely didn't hit the spot like the other ones.
| agouraki chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
wtf is this? crazy
| Daniel14541 chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Now that was a learning experience! One of the most important lessons that you can ever learn in life is to survive and to lose properly is one of its aspects. Are you going to teach Harry the rest?
| MrRobertsIII chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
What an utterly unique Professor Quirrell you have. Wonderful. I've been reading fanfic for too many years, but I can't recall ever reading something like this.
| AiSard chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
...wait... so this is actually Quirrel? lemme check again, is this a complete AU with rewritten histories and everything? or is there a point of divergence from canon, say Quirrel did something and absorbed the Dark Lord, or Quirrel is lying, or this was original Quirrel without the Dark Lord at the back of his head?
| Vilkath chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
I have to say this story seemingly getting rather weird. Harry grew up his whole life without being a raging psychopath and yet all the sudden within DAYS of hogwarts he is going so dark everyone and their mother keeps telling him this? He keeps thinking it?
I also do not like the idea no one else aparently is viewed to need any attidue adjustment, harry's the only ambitious one in hogwarts? What about the future death eaters are they just ignored because they are low impact thug evil VS take over the world evil?
I don't mind the idea but I just think it's way to much, to soon and for all peoples talk about not wanting Harry to go evil everyone seems to be doing their best to push harry into acting out. Seems to be no middle road between raging dark lord type vengence and being a total whimp and a push over to other abusive bullies like in slytherin and Snape.
So far most of the 'advice' given to harry is the useless prattle adults always give children, that you can always walk away from a fight, telling a teacher solves everything and that if you just ignore them they will go away. Doesn't matter if you watch a teacher mutliate a baby and sacrafice it to a dark rituall.. keep your head down. It's better to follow the rules than do any good.
| Chereche chapter 19 . 5/7/2010
Okay, this chapter was disturbing...I really think the "humour" aspect of this story disappeared a few chapters back. Sorry to say it, but I really enjoyed the story at its start, now its just getting...weird. I hope it goes uphill from here.
Oh and one question, why do you put your author notes on your profile? You are allowed to put them into the chapter unless it's excessively long, and gauging from the lengths of yours, you can incorporate them here instead of going through all the trouble of putting them on your profile without consequence.