|Reviews for Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality|
| ack1308 chapter 29 . 4/6
| Smiling Jack chapter 29 . 3/5
I love the inserted reference names. I distinctly remember killing the queen of the Creator Race in NWN 1. :D
| Jatok chapter 29 . 11/14/2016
Ugh, my only problem is how they both underestimate her, when the "wars" are completely non lethal and thus have no impact on her ridiculous "morality".
| Daziy is SoniQ chapter 29 . 10/24/2016
What. The. Hell. What was that with Pettigrew? He's not Scabbers in here? Where is he?
| Rambling Drabble chapter 29 . 9/25/2016
1. It's getting harder and harder to write these reviews now that there's a lot less foreshadowing and a lot more actual meat of the story. Still, the stuff on Sirius Black was a good refresher. I had forgotten that there had to be an explanation as to why nobody cared much for Black conspiracy theories, and why nobody in the wizarding world would much care to look into it if someone asked them to.
| blood-doll-aishiteru chapter 29 . 9/19/2016
I have to admit, I'm nervous about this battle thing, but it's probably gonna be spectacular.
| sunset oasis chapter 29 . 9/3/2016
OMG ... the plotting between the three ... it's so interesting. I love all sorts of twists and turns and hidden layers. And Quirrel is ... as Quirrel as ever.
| The Anguished One chapter 29 . 6/10/2016
Harry, Draco, and Hermione are the three generals, pitting them in a three-way battle... Oh, that'll make for a lot of fun. I don't even know who to root for between them.
| Montara chapter 29 . 1/22/2016
Hermione the general :) I can understand her wanting to make a name for herself.
| Secre chapter 29 . 1/5/2016
I am decidedly unsure as to how to take the Pettigrew thing...I'd taken that as basic canon I have to admit so you threw a significant spanner in the works. I am very much enjoying this although on occasions you make my head hurt. Lots. But I was meant to stop reading this two hours ago and go and get my exercise DVD out except I am still here which is decidedly annoying. I'll be very interested in seeing how the Battle School plays out...although after I have wreched my backside from this very comfy position with this highly intriguing story to go and do something I was meant to do hours ago. Also, brilliant ending to this chapter.
| Jillian A.K chapter 29 . 1/3/2016
Was that Blaise under Polyjuice Potion? Or was he using some magical means of communication to supply her with the right answers? Or was that genuine Hermione?
| rlsa chapter 29 . 12/20/2015
This is such a strange fic. I really like it. The wars are a really nice addition.
| WatchingTheWatchman chapter 29 . 12/6/2015
Poor Hermione. Being the rival of the Boy Who Lived is hard enough, but being a girl at the same time makes it harder. Wizarding society seems to exhibit the same signs of heteronormative gender expectations that mundane society does, which defines every woman with relation to the men in her life. And feminism doesn't seem to be a thing.
She should read more scifi and fantasy, it'd change her black and white view of the world, and help her with the battles. I can't wait to see what she comes up with as a general!
| ShadowLDrago chapter 29 . 10/17/2015
Wait, Harry's parents were killed on HALLOWEEN? Yeesh, Voldemort really HAS no heart, any less of a heart and he'd do so on Christmas Day!
| P. P. P chapter 29 . 9/13/2015
I have a bad feeling that Quirrell thinks that he has a better chance of corrupting Hermione into becoming a Dark Lady than he does of corrupting Harry into becoming a Dark Lord.
| Zyxis chapter 29 . 8/13/2015
Aw. Poor Harry. ;~; I'm surprised he hasn't tried to invent new spells or recreate spells from fantasy novels yet. He probably will. Maybe. You're the author, idk. For all I know he could start trying to figure out how to create magical artifacts.
| Concolor44 chapter 29 . 5/23/2015
I'd leave a real review, but it's almost two in the morning and I'm so tired that I'm propping my eyelids open with toothpicks. I'll probably have to read this chapter again tomorrow.
| PA chapter 29 . 5/20/2015
Oh god, I can't wait to see what Hermione's gonna do to those who would doubt her.
| xneseyx chapter 29 . 5/7/2015
I really like your Quirrell. This is the first fic I've read where he wasn't some kind of incompetent, naive idiot.
| Village-Mystic chapter 29 . 3/22/2015
Good scenes... regarding empathy... how do you feel about the theory that empathy level depends upon how much the infant child is held close in early months. The babies who are left to cry themselves to sleep from birth or nearly from birth and who are generally not held as much as infants develop a lower or "impaired" sense of empathy. While you can argue that part of this is reasoning (no one will help me), a great part of this is touch-sense learning.
| 4everfictional chapter 29 . 3/14/2015
| TheButterflyComposer chapter 29 . 12/24/2014
Having three very clever people lead three broomstick armies against each other comprised of untrained, incompetent children is just a massive excuse to have a comedic set piece, isn't it?
Or is this actually going to be played seriously?
I hope not, or I'll start wondering how on earth some eleven year olds firing sparks at each other could be threatening.
I'm not even entirely sure what the generals are going to do. They don't know the terrain they will be fighting on (none of them have memorised Hogwarts yet), their soldiers are crap and therefore none of them can simply rush the others with either skill or force of numbers and unless Harry takes the gloves off and starts setting up lethal traps and his troops let him, this is going to end in a draw.
I'm interested to see what's going to happen here.
| Guest chapter 29 . 10/22/2014
P(Bill Weasley has psychotic break which correctly identifies Peter Pettigrew as a rat animagus)P(Bill Weasley received the knowledge Peter Pettigrew was a rat animagus from a source with prior knowledge)... in other words, I don't buy that his psychotic break just happened to line up with cannon like that, and you promised no read herrings, thus I think there is actually a plot clue in here.
| DaMeiPhantomhive chapter 29 . 9/19/2014
| Percabethgirl2645 chapter 29 . 8/3/2014
That ending made me really sad :,(
| thepkrmgc chapter 29 . 8/2/2014
it seems like ranma is a hufflepuff at hogwarts...
I like the battle room scenario youve set up (although i expected ron to end up a gryffendor's commander): hermione is going to pull an ender and tronce both draco and harry
| DamionKenley117 chapter 29 . 7/26/2014
"And of course when they get there they think he's crazy, but they use Veritas Oculum on the rat anyway, just to be sure, and what do they discover?"
She would've died. "A rat."
"You win a cookie! So they dragged poor Bill Weasley off to St. Mungo's and it turned out to be a pretty standard schizophrenic break, it just happens to some people, especially young men around what we'd consider college age. Guy was convinced he was ninety-seven years old and had died and gone back in time to his younger self via train station. And he responded perfectly well to antipsychotics and is back to normal and everything's fine now, except people don't talk as much anymore about Sirius Black conspiracy theories, and you don't ever ask the Weasleys about the family rat."
You deserve a medal for this passage. Like, a solid gold medal larger than your head. I half died laughing here.
| A chapter 29 . 6/15/2014
The nice one could never win in a fight, plotting against her to ensure she will lose & one step ahead.
| Masterman997 chapter 29 . 6/15/2014
And her/his father is a animagus who turns into a panda
| silverrain-shiningsun chapter 29 . 5/17/2014
"Why, that's very nice of you, Mr. Malfoy," said Granger. "I'm sorry for how I spoke to you earlier. We should be friends. Can I call you Drakey?"
Alarm bells started to sound in Draco's head, but there was a chance she meant it...
"Of course," said Draco, "if I can call you Hermy."
| Guest chapter 29 . 3/12/2014
In the wizarding sense, "dark magic" is indistinguishable from "evil magic". Saying someone is "not evil, just a little bit dark and a whole lot Slytherin" is indistinguishable from saying that someone is "not evil, just a little bit evil and a whole lot Slytherin".
Also, it seems that in the process of extracting the Idiot Ball from the hands of both protagonists and antagonists, you have foisted it upon yourself. That rat thing was even more ridiculous than the conspiracy theory / canon explanation.
| lemon-rind chapter 29 . 3/1/2014
I think I'm going to review now, as a compromise between your request earlier that we review "at most every chapter" and how I often wait until I finish reading to respond. This is because I found Hermione's feeling's toward flying particularly hilarious, and I especially found her annoyance at the lack of subtlety from Mandy to fantastic.
Anyway, carry on with your Hermione-hating-Quirrell ways. I'm just too amused by all of this.
| Alexja2013 chapter 29 . 1/24/2014
That was sad :( I can't wait for the battles on Defence
| Grizzmon chapter 29 . 1/13/2014
Is not easy being Hairy...
| Tacitus-8 chapter 29 . 1/2/2014
As a dentist, I love you.
| A.Tigerose chapter 29 . 12/11/2013
When in the story it said "if it were a play there would be dramatic music" a new song started on my iPod and it had a very dramatic intro. Just thought I'd share
| FireInLife chapter 29 . 11/30/2013
Oh my god, you are a god. "She makes her hair really red, like stopsign red not Weasley red, and when she spilled hot tea on herself she turned into a black-haired boy until she got it under control again."
I didn't get that reference at first, but it stood out to me so I read it again. And I realized. That is from Ranma 1/2. RANMA 1/2! Basically my favorite anime of all time. And you put a reference to it in this story. Oh my god you are amazing. I swear, if there is even one more Ranma reference I am going to love you forever, favorite this story, follow this story, favorite you, and read any other stories you've written.
| XxTigerlilyxX chapter 29 . 11/18/2013
Hey just to clarify before I begin this review. It is me Tigerlily, I'm just not currently in posession of a computer right now.
Anyway, I've found this chapter especially interesting. Hermione's inner monologue on Good and Bad was extremely well written and I loved how you capitalized them. Which added importance and affect to her thoughts and really showed how much it valued to Hermione.
The whole Draco attempting to manipulate Harry and Hermione was very well written. It was smart of him and I thought would've worked on anybody apart from Harry and Hermione here. I find the whole Quirrell army aspect interesting and can't wait to read on further!
| Lunacom chapter 29 . 8/16/2013
So this is really an alternative universe in a parallel or future timeline where after Bill had gone through his adult life after the cannon's war? It would be pretty cool if everything unraveled after a point. This is going to be my second time through. The first time I went through It was sometime in late 2011 or early 2012. I tend to read to fast to retain any real detail, but now I'm reading though with help of the podcast. It helps me slowdown and actually read your words instead of scanning and visualizing. Keep up the good work!
| Iluivatar chapter 29 . 7/18/2013
"She'd been in a shower stall this morning when she'd overheard a conversation between Morag and Padma that had been the last straw piled on top of quite a lot of other straws."
I like the pun. The expression is about straw breaking a camels back. But here it implies drinking straws.
| Pancoon chapter 29 . 7/12/2013
Love this so far . I must keep reading! :D:D
| Anon chapter 29 . 7/3/2013
Quirrell's class is Battle School, and Harry is Ender, and I love you
| Susan M. M chapter 29 . 12/20/2012
Good for Hermione.
| StrangeoneXD chapter 29 . 12/18/2012
Armies, interesting even with the extra reactions/responses/whatever, very sad end though WHY DID YOU KILL IT T.T
| kinosternon chapter 29 . 8/13/2012
"So they dragged poor Bill Weasley off to St. Mungo's and it turned out to be a pretty standard schizophrenic break, it just happens to some people, especially young men around what we'd consider college age. Guy was convinced he was ninety-seven years old and had died and gone back in time to his younger self via train station. And he responded perfectly well to antipsychotics and is back to normal and everything's fine now, except people don't talk as much anymore about Sirius Black conspiracy theories, and you don't ever ask the Weasleys about the family rat."
Um. Okay, I'm going to stick my neck out and say it, even though it feels silly, because I didn't see anyone point it out in reviews for this chapter and if it did turn out to be right and I didn't say anything I'd be missing out on a brilliant opportunity for an "I-told-you-so moment":
Is there any chance that this little anecdote is a Great Big Hint?
Because with Harry and the Remembrall way back there and how it's been repeatedly emphasized that Harry probably hasn't been Obliviated, the "c-crucify" hint even earlier with Draco at the Platform (which seems like a stumble that would only happen with prior, potentially horrible, knowledge of some sort), and a couple of other vague hint-theory-feeling things and some of the more obscure chapter openings near the very beginning, combined with Harry's aborted experiment with time travel to solve problems, it seems *possible* that their entire world has been rewound/reset before, with Harry/Quirrell/Voldemort or some combination thereupon (and not leaving out the possibility that all three of them have some sort of identity overlap going on) causing this to happen in an attempt to salvage a world gone wrong.
I get the joke about the train station reference and how implausible it is, and if that's all this is then I will feel suitably ridiculous, and would proceed to consider it funnier, if anything, for my mistake. However, if Harry did manage to do something like reset time (probably using the AI from Atlantis? Okay, full-blown I've-been-reading-bits-of-Less-Wrong conspiracy-theory mode here), would it not be possible that a sort of "afterlife stop-off" (as it were) would take shape for some of the people that were about to be looped back to their earlier selves, and that such a stop-off would look similar to that of the one Rowling!Harry constructed for himself in book 7?
I also suspect Sirius Black is Santa Claus (and can I just say that I *love* that I now have a reason to say that sentence), given the combination of a) intimate knowledge/contact with Harry's father (not to mention the added joke that since Harry is Sirius's godson, playing Santa for him had he grown up with his birth parents would not have been that much of a stretch), b) disregard for rules/distrust of apparently all authority figures, c) knowledge about Santa Claus, given that Sirius was said to have researched Muggle culture as part of his rebellion towards his parents, and possibly d) malicious or at least suspicious intent, if the impact of Sirius's heritage is going to be spun slightly more realistically in this story.
(I should probably add that this is at least my third reread, and that though it took me till the second time – possibly with the help of reviews – to figure out the great big obvious brilliant Azkaban hint, which does of course factor in here. Also, I suspect there will eventually be much more to Snape than meets the eye so far, but I have no idea what it is yet.)
Given all that, it'd be mighty convenient for a Sirius who was at least somewhat aware of the rewind(s) to have a story like Bill's keeping other people from seriously considering his possible whereabouts in *this* reality loop (or whatever the hell it is).
Oh, and also, since this is my first time reviewing (because I'm a horrible lazy person who's usually too proud to review without something interesting and/or original to say) I should probably add that this fic appears to be in the process of changing my life, that I've never seen a fanfiction even remotely like it in style or apparent goal, and that despite the occasional small flaw I am as ridiculously impressed with it as I am with what I've learned so far about its extraordinary author.
...And indeed, one of the most ridiculously impressive things about this story is that I would actually consider such a convoluted and improbable theory to be sufficiently worth consideration that I ended up writing small essay about it. It could just as easily *not* be true, of course – most of the hints could just as easily point somewhere else – but it feels like too much of a Chekov's Gun not to at least wonder about. But then again, I'm never really sure with this fic, since it's a story about rationality that's written in the language of narrative, and I'm really only even approaching fluent in only one of those languages.
tl;dr Bill Weasleyhint? (Probably not, but still.)
| voodooqueen126 chapter 29 . 8/2/2012
Well yes. When someone is evil. There is nothing wrong with hurting them. I am glad you have gotten that aspect of Hermione's character correct.
I can't believe I missed all those hints about sophistry in the chapter where Draco learns science.
| Satirica chapter 29 . 7/16/2012
Harry, Draco, and Hermione interacting together! This should be good, seeing as Harry always juggled his friendships separately before.
| Georgie Porgie chapter 29 . 5/8/2012
Miss Granger, this is Nameless-Faceless-Mook / Assassin Hired - he's on his way to kill your baby cousin, SHOOT HIM DEAD!
| Discord chapter 29 . 3/14/2012
I must know: Are you simply alluding to the amazing Douglas Adams each time you make a reference to Thursday, or are you giving an epic nod to Hayseed's fanfiction: "Getting the Hang of Thursdays"? Either way, it's wonderfully amusing.
| timunderwood9 chapter 29 . 3/13/2012
"Hermione had named her army the Sunshine Regiment.
Their insignia was a smiley face."
You know, like what the computers we build to make us happy will turn all of the matter in their light cone into.
| Therese Caldwell chapter 29 . 3/2/2012
Ok. I know what's going to happen. This is all terrible. At the end of the FIRST BOOK (if you're doing this as a series of books) Harry Potter is going to defeat ALL of his enemies from EVERY book AT THE SAME TIME. Voldemort is probably going to appear no less than as three people: the guy who is probably on the back of SOMEONE's head, the regenerated version (don't ask me how this works) and Tom Riddle. And possibly, since things in your universe are slightly different, my FAVORITE CHARACTER, one Sirius Black, is going to be evil. These eleven-year-olds are far too smart and clever and devious and this is SO FRUSTRATING because some of the subtle hints about what's really going on are so CRYPTIC I'm going to have to read this whole thing AGAIN once I finish! Because of this silly story, I have no idea about whether or not McGonagall will end up evil! (Although that's a stretch. It might be Snape.) Also, Tom Riddle's diary is... nowhere... unless it's actually the diary of that Bacon guy, for which you will earn some credit back from me, for at least keeping IN PART with the whole story.
Other than that, I think when you're done with this project, you should go write your own story, because this is clearly the way all fantasy wizard-related novels were meant to be written. I would definitely buy it. This story is wonderful. Just also very frustrating because I have no idea what's going on.
| Robbie the Phoenix chapter 29 . 2/19/2012
I've been meaning to say this for the last three chapters: I was really missing Hermione in some of those Draco-heavy chapters, so I'm glad she's back. And I guess I couldn't have picked a better chapter to finally remember to say that, because "General Hermione Granger" has to be one of the greatest things I've ever read in fanfiction.
Her whole exchange with Malfoy reminded me a lot of a line from a few chapters back, something about Hermione being a Titan and everyone else being puppies?
| Hedgehog chapter 29 . 2/8/2012
Ha! Now this Hermione I could get used to.
I loved the quib about Ravenclaws being incapable of browsing through a library in an orderly fashion, and the conspiracy about Sirius and Pettigrew. Obviously, the latter makes me wonder how the whole betrayal will play out in this universe. I expect it will come up when Harry comes up with a plan to tackle Azkaban.
Harry Potter Day ... ugh! I don't care much about Halloween myself, but at least that's a good name for a holiday. (I care about Noun Noun Day even less.)
| NotImplementedExcepton chapter 29 . 10/18/2011
I'm on my third read-through, and I just wanted to comment that the conversation Hermione has with Quirrel in this chapter is really well done. It illustrates why he's one of my favorite characters, but it's also just fantastic writing.
I should also mention that I've learned a ton from reading this fic, and I've certainly been thinking more about how I think!
| AR chapter 29 . 9/21/2011
That is the very sad part of having brilliant friends. It is a hard lesson to learn...not being jealous and learning the difference between being envious of someone elses fame and just wanting to be recognized for your own work.
I liked how she asked to become general. Looking forward to how that works for her.
| Faria Lyton chapter 29 . 9/14/2011
I'm not sure if that was a throwaway joke, or mocking JK's work or what, but I'd be tempted to use the whole "Weasley Family Rat" thing to show how corrupt their government is, favoring Obliviation and a cover-up over the truth.
| Megan McAlistair chapter 29 . 9/2/2011
"that had been the last straw piled on top of quite a lot of other straws."
she had decided not to refer to herself as a camel anymore
not since that dreadful tuesday
"You didn't get your own."
unfortunately... but it would be a wonderful new source of income for J.K... the stories of all the other people
"instead of Harry Potter's third leg"
don't you mean fourth leg?
my god, that was cheap
"Guy was convinced he was ninety-seven years old and had died and gone back in time to his younger self via train station."
but he got off in the wrong universe... one where going back in-
have you ever heard of "Oh God Not Again!"?
hilarious story, come to think of it... it, too, had a crazy-seeming Harry
"Sometimes she had nightmares about it always being Thursday."
good thing she doesn't dread Mondays, too
because with broomstick-Thursday and all bad things happening on Tuesdays... there wouldn't be that many days left
"if he'd just divided the universe into Good and Bad"
like me, I don't bother calling them North and South Korea
they're good and evil Korea
because our eyes/brains/both have evolved in a way that if we see something gray next to something in a darker shade of gray we think of the first one as white and the latter as black
I like embracing those little mistakes we make, they're predictable enough that they can be used
Harry Potter doesn't do classic undermining tactics
he's just "all over the place" as they say
just because he doesn't use "people stuff" as his primary tactic doesn't mean he's not good at it
"but there was a chance she meant it..."
after all, girls were weird and with his DASHING good looks it was only logical that they would all fall for him immediately
(I miss italics in the reviews)
"my parents are dentists and anything less than ten Galleons isn't worth my time at all."
dentist, considered a dangerous profession
"Now it was Harry Potter Day."
with you the trolls are in the comments, not not in the dungeons
(second "not" is on purpose, not a cognitive test or a typo)
| ironhair chapter 29 . 8/28/2011
grrrrrrrrrr... u spoilt the weasley rat angle !
I wonder how it will go in the future chapters, but I'm pretty sure you have something smart and extremely logical planned out.
| Paper Train chapter 29 . 8/8/2011
nice I really like this )
| Isa Knightwalker chapter 29 . 7/17/2011
Quirrel was awesome! I loved this line "Your friendship for Hermione Granger does you credit," Professor Quirrell said dryly. "Especially as you are able to be friends with Draco Malfoy at the same time. Quite a feat, that." - lol
I also can't wait to see what Hermione will do, she is awesome as well. Plus I think that she could be an awesome general.
| Tovath chapter 29 . 6/27/2011
Having some fun with some popular fanfic ideas are you ;-)
| MouetteHeartsErik chapter 29 . 4/12/2011
Oh cheers, Hermione, go, I can't wait to see how this turns out :D
| ARMH chapter 29 . 2/23/2011
I'm so embarrassed for Draco and Harry about how badly they lose.
| Alice Rose Winter chapter 29 . 2/20/2011
I must admit, from the very beginning this story has gone against everything I believe when it comes to Harry Potter. First there was the questioning of things I took for granted before, and now the story has completely and irrevocably been changed. I nearly stopped reading after the whole 'Ron' thing at the beginning, and now Pettigrew turns out to not be the rat. I admit, this story frustrates me to no end, I believe that is why I love it so much. I've decided to completely let go of my original ideas, if I don't I fear my brain might implode. However, if Voldemort is not a part of Quirrel then I can guarantee that my brain will implode. This is not an ultimatum seeing as the story is quite long already, but simply a warning.
God this story frustrates me, and that is why I must commend you on it.
| Kelliboh chapter 29 . 1/15/2011
um, im not quite sure how to review this without sounding incredibly dumb in comparison.
| mantimeforgot chapter 29 . 1/13/2011
I have to say, I am most pleased with progress so far. The ending of the first story arc was amazing. I found the first chapter of this new story arc... to be somewhat lacking in comparison to the previous chapters, but this new set of chapters were clearly quality work. The cunning Harry displays in his battle tactics is truly remarkable. I also find Daphne's "choice" in crush to be most exemplary too (I have to wonder if the decision was subconsciously a power play on her part in addition to the obvious increase in cool factor; the Greengrass and Longbottom families are renown for magical plants are they not? A controlling interest in magical plants is something to consider in the grand scheme of things)
| w chapter 29 . 1/9/2011
I wonder when I'll catch my tail in the reviews... no idea how to check which was the first one I wrote. Hopefully not yet for a couple more.
If you got too close to the Boy-Who-Lived, you became part of his story.
You didn't get your own.
Indeed, Hermione does get a bit less dimensional in the 60s.
Too many ares: Are you are not grateful?
Her perception of Q is nice too.
Unfortunately there was a slight flaw in this plan.
Namely, they were both Ravenclaws. Each had thought it was just one special exception they would make only this one time, and neither had yet realized it was impossible for either of them to ever finish reading all the book titles no matter how hard they tried.
Nice making fun of a canon. And describing Hermione's attitude to broomsticks.
It made her feel flattered, and also a little worried because Harry didn't seem to really talk to anyone besides her. hm? How about Draco?
The reasoning why Q is evil is very very nice.
Anthony Goldstein and Ernie Macmillan, came the thought, before Draco's common sense kicked in and ruled out mudbloods and Hufflepuffs no matter how aggressively they dueled.
The entire conversation with Q.
Come with me to visit Malfoy Manor, my father and I would like to show you some interesting spells.
This shows Draco's personality so well and chillingly too.
| Dodos-r-not-extinct chapter 29 . 1/7/2011
So did Sirius really betray the Potters in this universe? Or is Pettigrew just hiding somewhere else?
| Tangshou chapter 29 . 1/4/2011
This is a terrific lead up to the battles. Many well-done details. Hermoine being known as 'Harry's rival.' Hermoine knowing Quirrell is evil but not knowing how to put it into words. Draco being confused about Harry's intentions when talking to Quirrell about Hermoine being a general. The story of Pettigrew and the rat. And then Harry Potter Day, and Harry's reaction to it.
| Bob chapter 29 . 12/29/2010
.Hermione. I have read at least 15,000 words, which means I should review.
Very nice story. Harry's a prick though.
| Lynn K. Hollander chapter 29 . 12/19/2010
'...competition might be good for Draco and I...' ~~'Good for I?' What were you thinking? Wrong pronoun. 'It's good for me' so it's also '...competition might be good for Draco and ME...' Check out The Transitive Vampire, by Karen Elizabeth Gordon.
| Vosdemin chapter 29 . 12/16/2010
Michael Shermer as a wizard? I nearly fell out of my chair.
| White Rabbit Asylum chapter 29 . 11/29/2010
Phew. I've been absolutely devouring this story lately. Finishing chapter twenty-nine, I decided that it was about time for me to log in and leave a legitimate review.
Honestly... wow. Really, this has completely blown me away. I was a little skeptical when I read the description on the tvtropes pages. Harry Potter Scientific Reasoning ? It just seemed a little iffy.
But it works. Oh boy, does it ever WORK.
I'm used to seeing Slytherin!Harry stories. But Ravenclaw!Harry is such a fresh concept that I found myself reading on just to see how in the world you were going to pull it off. My heart plummeted a little with the Sorting Hat fake-out; and then I was like, "Oh, okay."
...And once I figured out that yes, you were going to be able to make Ravenclaw!Harry work without any glitches, I found myself being propelled along by the plot itself. A lot of authors who stick Harry in other houses often follow the books in all other respects, resulting in a certain feeling of deja vu. But alas! An actual PLOT! I rejoice!
Ahem. Well, now that I've heaped on the praise about the premise and plot, the third P: prose.
I tip my hat to you, sir.
I'm a firm believer that the best kind of prose is that which becomes invisible to the reader and in no way distracts from the flow of ideas, thoughts, and images. You've achieved that perfect balance. The chapter flew away like watching a movie on screen. Not mention I was cracking up almost every other line in the earlier chapters.
And I'm sure you hear this all the time, but I feel smarter after reading this.
Well, with that monster of a review, I take my leave.
| equivalogic chapter 29 . 11/8/2010
"The competition might be good for Draco and I ..."
A rare grammatical slip from our 11-year old hero.
Imagine my surprise that my high school senior son decided to make a certain bit of fan fiction the primary topic of his college "common application" essay. It's been submitted, and yet your story is not done. The entire course of someone's life may depend on whether the chapters yet to come are more like Tom Sawyer's sequel, or the Matrix sequels.
| Carib chapter 29 . 11/1/2010
| George W Bush chapter 29 . 10/31/2010
| Indigo Ziona chapter 29 . 10/28/2010
'Harry had suggested that they could, as a first pass, read just the titles of all the books in the library, and then Hermione could read all the tables of contents.
Hermione had thought this was a brilliant idea. She'd never done that with a library before.'
That is, somehow, ingenious, although there is the obvious flaw. I like the idea though.
General Granger. I love it. Good for her :)
| Armagnac chapter 29 . 10/20/2010
I would buy that Hermione subscribes to a form of virtue ethics rather than deontology. It's hard to tell from the story so far if she believes more in rules and duties or personal character. In any case it's clear that she wants to think of herself as Good and tends to believe what authories say about being good. However, I do not buy motive consequentialism as a possible philosophy. A motive consequentialist would not assign moral blame to lapses in judgment which followed from a good motive. But it's clear that Hermione does. She disapproves of Harry's behavior even when he has good motives *and* produces good consequences, if she believes his methods are wrong in themselves.
This discussion makes me wonder if any of the other characters could be ascribed a coherent ethical theory. It seems we haven't seen enough of their motivations yet.
| mantimeforgot chapter 29 . 10/19/2010
I am fairly positive (80%) that ascribing a deontological morality to Hermione would be wrong. She is almost certainly a member either of the "Motive Consequentialist" or "Virtue Ethics" branch of morality.
Early in the story she is fretting over her treatment of Harry. She recognizes that she intends to make him uncomfortable, which is entirely different than how she interacts with others (notice her good heroines aren't supposed to do that inner dialogue), and then struggles to come up with a motive which she can ascribe to herself which would explain how her behavior of "liking him squirm" could in fact be justifiable (virtuous).
| wisecurledqueen chapter 29 . 10/16/2010
Um, hey. On chapter 50 (by the way, congrats!), there's an error.
- Padma Patil, that is not the pride of Salazar, that is Slytherin gone rotten, Padma Parkinson not Padma 'Malfoy'...-
Anyway, thought I should tell you that.
Brilliant chapter though!
| Nerdfish chapter 29 . 10/13/2010
Romance of the three kingdoms.
The noble Hermione.
The evil Malfoy.
And the insidious Potter.
All three are equally poised, all three are equally committed ...
| Kutta chapter 29 . 10/10/2010
| LunaSlashSea chapter 29 . 10/8/2010
| Yuen chapter 29 . 9/7/2010
This is... just a review for the story in general. I personally think this is a work of genius as well as a work of art, I've learnt things that I've never heard of before, words really cannot describe the vast amount of respect I hold for you as well as this piece of work, and god damn it, as a college student pursuing a BS degree in Psychology, every time I read about experimental design methods or even THINK of something remotely science-related, I think of Harry's voice explaining it in my head as I read it. DAMN YOU FOR MAKING THE FIELD OF SCIENTIFIC INQUIRY FUN FOR ME AGAIN, DAMN YOU! Hahaha~
| ClanWandKunai chapter 29 . 8/28/2010
A new and interesting theory about the rons rat. However, you have disregarded the maximum age of non-magical rats.
| Morbious20 chapter 29 . 8/12/2010
| Dead Man Writing Is Dead chapter 29 . 8/7/2010
Like the opening monologue of Hermione. But, once again, that patronus thing. You really are cramming everything into one year. It's like A Very Potter Musical...
| CeilingFan chapter 29 . 8/4/2010
Aww. I love how feeling Harry is, and that he turns to sad sci-fi when moping.
I'm also a little frightened for Harry and Draco. Hermione led horrible Umbridge to certain death-by-centaur in her sixth year. She needed a couple of years to understand the value of being ruthless (let's say polyjuice theft in 3rd year), but when she got it...yesh. She should've been in charge of the series.
| Little Lion chapter 29 . 7/11/2010
Nice Ranma 1/2 reference. Maybe you should have him pop up once in awhile, as an aside.
| patrick43057 chapter 29 . 7/10/2010
So the rat is only a rat? I like the story just wondering what else will change. Thanks for writing it.
| mitremlap chapter 29 . 7/10/2010
Great story, thank you, update soon.
| ferridder chapter 29 . 7/10/2010
Interesting leap to PC-hood by Hermione. I also enjoy how she talks directly to Quirrell; in most fiction, the relationships between the secondary characters factor through the primary one.
Looking forward to the battles, Hermione will clearly be a wild card - with budding minions of her own!
| Me chapter 29 . 7/9/2010
i miss the tea
| asdfkwoei chapter 29 . 7/9/2010
Love it. Learned so much sci from this fic. Helped me do my homework too. And the fact that it's Harry Potter is just icing on the cake. :]
| Ichihime chapter 29 . 7/9/2010
I really got an 'Ender's Game' vibe with all the talk of child generals, fights and so on.
| LockandLoad chapter 29 . 7/9/2010
So, Ranma Saotome is a fourth year Hufflepuff, eh ?
Lesswrong, you are absolutely right, if his ability wasn't boosted, Voldermort won't stand a slightest chance in hell against this generation of Hogwarts.
BTW, their army, Granger's, Potter's and Malfoy's, what are they gonna be called ? Dragon ? Phoenix ? Rabbit ?
| Hysteria and Chaos chapter 29 . 7/9/2010
This is an interesting story. I am intrigued by what you've done with the Harry Potter Universe. I'll admit that some of the changes irritate me a bit, but I can understand that it is all for the benefit of the scientific elements of the story.
Definitely looking forward to your next update - keep up the good work.
| Destined Warlord chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
Very interesting chapter. I must say, well written, as usual. As for the whole dueling teams concept, I'm guessing the main idea of the whole thing will be revealed next chapter. Can't wait.
| Tom Buckner chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
I see that the Author comments in the chapter notes: "Literally no one seems to have gotten Aftermath 2 to Ch. 28, so I guess I made that one too subtle. Sigh. Still learning, I guess." I had to think on it a little, but here's my guess:
Prof. Snape made Harry promise not to reveal any of their disastrous conversation. Harry felt compelled to warn Dumbledore, and might have said this:
"I have learned that Prof. Snape's love for my late biological mother was his good, true and secret reason for being someone you, Dumbledore, can trust. But in learning this, I, Harry, have stupidly damaged or destroyed Prof. Snape's motivation for being someone you can still trust; be warned."
Since Harry couldn't say any of that, he gave poor Dumbledore a warning with no handle. Dumbledore was forced to take a stab in the dark. Following the rule of "If you hear hoofbeats, think horses, not zebras," not even Albus Dumbledore could correctly divine the real warning, and instead settled on a more prosaic fear: that one of his faculty (Snape) might be dallying with a female student. Dumbledore had a word with Snape, and Miss Cornfoot was sent packing.
I think this fanfic is in serious danger of challenging the original in quality. This could lead to divide-by-zero errors, time running backward, and cats and dogs living together.
Spoilerish speculation follows!
P.S. What Harry said in the early chapters about violating the quantum hamiltonian is Important, and name-checking Bester shows how the Pioneer horcrux might soon be in Harry's grasp. Harry's success with Transfiguration has broader implications here. If Gulliver Foyle could do it...
The Words of Power and Madness are Important too, I think. Harry's experiment with the time turner suggests even lost access codes may be cracked. I will say no more at this time.
| ray chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
wait i dont get the animagus thing
| luosha chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
ps. i like harry potter meets ender's game.
| KatheeHDS chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
WOW! i've spent almost 5 hours of my lifetime with this? or even more? if i recall, the last time i looked the clock it was almost 4 a.m, and now it's 11:14AM... reading in the PC is really more slow and tiring that it's actually on a real book with real pages!
Well, i'm not gonna extend myself on the weird timeline, crossing information from the first book with facts of the last book, and spicing it all with quantum physics, genetic, magic and manipulation.
It's one of the best stories I've ever read, and if when you end it you print it and sent it signed (i'd pay the shipping bill and the cost of the printing, and, as i don't know if this is legal, i don't think i could pay you for this, but maybe "donate" something for your hard work...
This is a fantasy book filled with essays, and it is really worth reading it, although now i've got a headache, coming from sleep-deprival and 22 hours staring the damn screen, as a result of my games the reading...
I can't say I can't wait for the next chapter-it wouldn't be true- this 29 chapters have left me with no more brain functions than the ones needed to climb the stairs, get a glass of milk and go get a goooood nap.
Maybe when i'll wake up i'll will be desperate for another chapter, but, till then, i hope you're writing really fast!
| graydevilforever chapter 29 . 7/8/2010
I honestly was writing a GLOWING review in my mind by the time I read two chapters of this story. Not a chapter went by where I was not laughing hysterically. Seriously. Then the story steadily turned darker and darker. And I have stuck with the story all the way and will continue, but I honestly do not know who to root for anymore. I know that this is probably a sign of a great writer, but I cringe almost every time Harry opens his mouth now. He went from really smart and clever to arrogant and hurtful. A kid growing up makes mistakes, but will he ever gain that glossy shine of humor once more? From this review you can probably tell I hate angst and yes I'll suck it up. I will root for Professor Quirrell/ (advanced Voldermort possession?), because he's wonderful. I loved that scene where he stumbled and crushed the beetle on purpose. The AU aspect of this world is hard to follow as at the start I thought you were taking the normal universe and changing who Petunia married. Well that is very Not what you are doing I see now. Still I like the story and will read more when it comes out. Oh in case you were ever wondering I read this story in the first place, because Toki Mirage has it listed in her favorites. That is pretty cool, as she is one of my favorite authors.
| Final-Fan chapter 29 . 7/7/2010
Well, that would appear to put paid to the Pettigrew hypothesis. I did of course consider Lupin as a possibility as I was writing the Pettigrew hypothesis, but it just seemed less ... symmetrical. Now, though, he's the last Marauder on the map (presuming he exists here), but the question of access is a really serious stumbling block. Not to mention the intelligence given in the letters.
I'm really out of ideas there, except for a return to the Crazy (Like a Fox (on LSD)) Dumbledore hypothesis.
I wonder if Quirrel had anything to do with the Weasley's mysterious success? His surprise seemed genuine, but there are a few ways for a Magnificent Bastard such as himself to pull that off. And his epiphany did seem a bit ... curiously timed.
Speaking of which, I also wonder if the Weasley's amnesia was just a COMPLETELY UNDERSTANDABLE ploy to avoid having to come up with an explanation yourself - or to keep us in the dark just for giggles - or if there is something more to it.
| ejhawman chapter 29 . 7/7/2010
Just found out about the great argument over what opinions you present and what you actually support. I've been wrestling with the question myself in my own works from time to time, so I can see how frustrating it can be for some reviewers not to get what you're saying.
Poor Hermione. Starting to realize she's a supporting character.
Quirrell playing at being evil again. Trying to do the Magnificent Bastard right...
An almost crippling problem for Ravenclaws: they can't spend too much time in a library or they end up trying to read the whole thing.
So you've chosen to have the Pettigrew thing resolved in the most straightforward fashion - never went to the Weasleys. And the reasoning makes too much sense - here's another plot hole everyone seems to have missed! Now, Peter could still be alive somewhere else and Sirius might still be innocent - but is there any need? The story is wide open at this point. Chomping at the bit to see where this goes.
Hermione has trouble with the Defense club. No killer instinct. Maybe, but she could also learn to look at the battles as a sport. Won't win, but she might gain the courage to fight. In the books she is able to at least use nonlethal spells and acquits herself well against the Death Eaters, and these games, if they are to be only games, under the Headmaster's purview, can't really get too intense.
Then the politics of alliances - deep stuff for eleven-year-old kids. Very practical education in the value of loyalty. Presumably, one match will be held to test each possible alliance.
James Randi as a wizard: Golden idea, but doesn't belong here. This story is about Harry Potter as the first rationalist wizard; Randi would have been that, if he had the power.
The detail about Harry's view of Halloween: in this AU he's smart enough to realize what it means and why it shouldn't be a happy day for him. Makes you wonder how stupid he must be in canon that he doesn't see it that way there.
| LoireLoa chapter 29 . 7/7/2010
I just caught up with all of the recent chapter (23 onwards) and I have to say: it was amazing! Quirrel crushed Rita (literally), and the Weasley twins pulled a prank so great they weren't able to keep the memories of how they did it! (I suspect Dumbledore is behind it though - he has that kind of pull.) I also liked how Harry set out to prove to Hermione that he could do something that an adult couldn't - and completely forgot that he managed to best Voldemort to the point where the man is a disembodied spirit, which is something not even Dumbledore could accomplish (and to think, Harry did it at a little over a year old). And Hermione should know better by now that there is no going back from the long shadow of The-Boy-Who-Lived - even if she beats him, she'll still be seen as "the girl who beat Harry Potter". If Harry hadn't sighed up and she won the tournament, no one would even care except that she's his friend. Hermione can't outshine Harry because she's not famous (like Harry, who is uber-famous), nor is she from a family that is infamous (like Draco). She's an unknown, and would have remained so for quite some time if she had not associated herself with Harry. People will only care if she beats him until he does something else that's amazing.
Off that topic, I love how Harry told Snape the truth about his mother and father. He's a much better person than each of them - I mean, look how forgave Draco. Draco TORTURED him and Harry still forgave him. All Snape did was call Lily a bad name.
Keep up the great work!
| superbunny chapter 29 . 7/7/2010
I'd like to suggest that Hermione pick Ron Weasley and Neville Longbottom as soldiers in her army. One of the few things Ron seems to excel at is chess, making him a good strategist. I think he would relish the opportunity to show up both the boy-who-lived and Malfoy. It would set up an interesting dynamic between the trio to have Ron come in on Hermione's side rather than Harry's. Neville Longbottom, as weak and nebbishy as he appears, has been shown throughout the books to be a tough and loyal ally with courage to spare. Perhaps this could be an early opportunity for him to shine.
| ICWT chapter 29 . 7/7/2010
They said it couldn't be done! something as good as MoR, too bad it's a one-shot: s/5190366
| Hammerchuckery chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
So rich in detail that your brain begins to swell. Nose bleeds and loss of hearing on one side were the side effects.
Thanks for the fun story. It certainly is quite interesting and quite humorous.
| TJeanetteT chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
Fucking awesome chapter! Loved the Harry Potter day detail and his reaction to it. I feel almost like malfoy, hermione, and harry are mob bosses or something with the way they interact sometimes. Like that meeting between hermione and malfoy. Completely brilliant. And the scientific details you add to the story just add this realism that most authors who write this type of fic don't have the knowledge to add.
| ilikebluepineapples chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
Cecelia: Lol, good question!
| aaronmicalowe chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
reading this is the highlight of my week/month/whenever i read it. i wish i could say more, Less, but i guess the only way you could write something that everyone agreed with would be to write nothing at all. keep up the good work and i look forward to the next chapter.
| HJP265 chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
I really loved this chapter...especially how Hermione handled the situation with Draco... and Quirrell is brilliant...and how you wrote that little Ranma thing in was great too
all in all I just love the chapter, the characters and the story as a whole...so keep up wih the great work
| James Birdsong chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
| Cecelia chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
I still want to know how Harry's head was "resting on his elbows."
| MiiRsEnd chapter 29 . 7/6/2010
Nice, a battle royal will be rather interesting and very complicated stratigically. The story is getting to be epic and its only about 2 months in!
Loving the update rate too. Well done.
| Dors chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I'd like to think out loud so I can claim Quirrell points if I guessed correctly - was it not Hermione in the general's chair, but rather that fifth year Hufflepuff girl who is a Metamorphmagus, with specific instructions? I'll submit that this is highly unlikely, since a Hufflepuff is even less likely to refer to the Malfoys' wealth, but if something didn't feel right to Draco, maybe this could be why. At any rate, I've seen some commenters say you're straying too far from canon - I believe that this plot line and indeed the make up of the whole story is so good that it can stand by itself and need not dive to to the original work for salvation. I'm delighted by the major changes you made and I wish I could read everything all at once!
| TBooki chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I just love how you portray Hermione... her basic ideas over good, evil, and 'Romance' are hilarious to read and seem very realistic for the young bookworm to create!
I'm beginning to look forward to even mere scenes with Quirrell... Him mentioning taking away points one by one from Hermione was simply evil and hysterical to read. It seems that he's finding it easier to play with all of his students, not only Harry.
I did find Harry's reaction to "The Skeptical Wizard" somewhat off for his character. I can see him finding enjoyment in the simple conspiracy theories, but the fact that they're deliberating over who betrayed his parents would probably make him more serious over the matter. Although the twist that Peter wasn't (or is no longer) the Weasely's rat creates an interesting development... could Wormtail have realized Bill had discovered him and somehow replaced himself with another rat and escaped(if we're going with a canon Wormtail... not that plausible) or maybe Quirrell-mort was involved to a certain degree and Peter is already dead or somewhere else hiding... Or perhaps Sirius is indeed a mass murderer with your take of events. Sigh... I suppose I'll just have to wait and see.
The armies should be fun and give off a distinct "Ender's Game" aura. Draco seems to be utterly panicked by the turn of events if his botched attempts to manipulate his opponents are anything to go by. Harry's right, having the name Malfoy is making him stand out a little more.
Another excellent chapter! It looks like your getting ready to get some action-packed chapters (although with Bacon's journal, probably more of an intellectual stimulation, I suppose) started with all of these plot introductions. Concerning Aftermath 2... and many more I'm guessing... I wasn't aware there was anything more there than what was openly said... maybe too subtle on your part or just some serious oversight on all of our parts. I know that sometimes when reading fanfics I tend to relax my brain a little more than normal (your fic is proving this not wise). I'll simply have to re-read it all sometime!
| Xuenay chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Ooooh. Armies? Some actually *interesting* game to replace Quidditch? I love it.
Now I want to see the battle.
| dontcallmemadeline chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Your chapters and plots and sub plots are just as confusing as ever. Great Job! :D
And poor Harry... I always wondered how he could just go to the Halloween feasts and not seem to notice the other significance of the date. Then again, it would be quite depressing to be reminded of the fact that your parents were dead on the exact day they died for the rest of your life... would suck, really.
Anyways, keep up the great work, I'm looking forward to the next chapter!
| TegwenielWestwind chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I think Hermione will do just fine as a general.
| rabbit and -v-Jinx-v chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Delightful! Congratulations on being able to keep everyone (other than Harry, whom you've deliberately changed) perfectly themselves!
| rabidsamfan chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
This is a fascinating AU. I love the way you've managed to keep Harry eleven at crucial moments. (No, he wouldn't understand why a fifteen year old girl couldn't accept an apology if it meant that the boy with the crush on her would build his hopes up again.)
And of course, there are parts that make me absolutely howl with glee. I love your poor put upon McGonagall for one. And Chapter Five nearly broke me in half.
I'll look forward to more!
| outlawpoet chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Nice to get the focus on the other two of the triumvirate, but isn't Draco floundering a bit more than he should? Surely he's used to dealing with older, smarter, more experienced wizards. Lucius is incredibly practical in this AU, he wouldn't have skimped teaching Draco how to minimize losses and not prod at situations he doesn't understand yet. (And probably not to propose betrayal to people who think of themselves as Good).
This Armies storyline is really promising though. I alternately dearly hope and fear the interaction between your brand of grounded fantasy and the fantastical scifi of Orson Scott Card.
| iseenodifference chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
awww poor harry! Loved the chapter! please update soon
| Jamie chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Ugh. "The competition might be good for Draco and I": One would hope that a boy as clever as Harry would better grasp the basic rules of grammar.
| x-caitlin-x chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
This was a very enjoyable chapter. I'm exhausted and I'm sorry I can't give a more rounded review at the moment, but I can't wait to see Harry and Draco thoroughly wrong-footed by what I assume is going to be Hermione's surprise attack/betrayal during the battles.
Regarding Aftermath, 2 - I have to admit to being yet another person who doesn't get it. In fact, I didn't even realise there was anything that I was missing until I read your author's note. I bow to your subtletly, and hope it's something that becomes clear in a later chapter rather than a little something extra for people who figure it out, because you've roused my curiosity now!
| Animekitty47 chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
What do you mean no one got the outtake about Snape and the girl with a crush on him? What was there not to get? *scratches head* And, yeah, you're scenario of the third book is what would have actually happened, huh? I have a feeling you like Thirty Xanatos Pileups. XD
| Sarah chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I must say that I really enjoyed your Bill-Petigrew bit. What has happened to the rat in your verse? So curious. And I like that you didn't write him off as stupid.
| phoebe turner chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
| mikhail-ling chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Long time lurker, but decided to pop in to drop a note. Kudos for the well written story - the various interplay between characters, the emotional strings tied together with the rationality of the content, and many, many more make this fic such a good fic. People may complain that it deviates too much from canon, but heck - it's AU. It's not a canon!rewrite. It's meant to be different.
I still don't get Aftermath 2, even after re-re-reading Chapter 28, and re-reading Chapter 29 (in case I missed something, which I very much doubt). The only thing I can possibly guess is that Snape now cares enough about people's feelings to deal with his student's crush, having been introduced to a possible explanation to his rejection by Lily Evans. Will you "explain" the point? Or will you simply leave it be?
I like how Hermione's stepped up to the batting plate and now is trying to fight for her own story, and no longer content with just being Harry Potter's [insert relation here]. I see her as a very young and perhaps overly innocent (yet subtly very mature at the same time) Light-side persona. She's like a true Hero, perhaps in the sense of the Lawful Good Paladin from D&D. I love her exchange with Draco, and the bit with Harry after. Being Lawful Good is sometimes just that simple, and Draco's inability to twist around it, and Harry's patient exasperation (I read a little of that into the exchange) just made me smile.
Only thing I'd like to add - I miss a little bit of the innocence (or should I say, the crazed exasperation and indignation on Harry's part) when Magic just seemed to screw him around, with Harry's reaction to Prof McGonagall turning into a cat, to Comed-Tea, to "DO NOT MESS WITH TIME". I miss seeing in my head Magic sucker-punching Harry, going "Psyche!" and Harry going a little "DO NOT WANT". It's just a little sinful delight that I chuckle at when I re-read past chapters.
Keep up the good work, at any rate!
| dogbertcarroll chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I actually like reading this Draco, he's fun!
| yamiishot chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
Oooh I've loved every minute of this fiction so far, it's brilliant and I cannot wait for more! These armies should be interesting.
| anon chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I tried reading the original books. I really did. But they were made for children and I am no longer a child so I couldn't even get past the halfway point of the first book (and from what I've seen Rowling isn't even a very good writer).
TVTropes fanfic recommendations are so useful!
| jdboss1 chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
good you updats on sunday
Best Story of 2010
| Ijoan chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
This story is getting more and more interesting with each chapter. I'm really liking Hermione although I hope she won't lose that "goodiness" that makes her her. Anyway looking forward to the next update.
| Aharon chapter 29 . 7/5/2010
I enjoy your work a lot, but in the last chapter, my suspension of disbelief broke a bit. The stories premise is that Harry is the first who applies rationality to magic. Thus, I was a bit surprised about The Skeptical Wizard being produced by James Randi. He isn't a scientist, sure, but still a skepticist - so I think if he had access to real magic, he would apply the same thorough testing Harry does - and would have done so before Harry. It was still a funny quip, but at the expense of suspension of disbelief, for me.
| Starlight Chibi-chan chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I can't wait to see all the strategizing and stuff going on during the military battles! D
| badkidoh chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Another good chapter.
| Dumbledork chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
| Nongarak chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
D'aww. Poor Harry. The Dark Lord Killed My Parents Day is my least favourite holiday.
Nice chapter, though! I like the idea of the armies thing. Can't wait to see how this turns out!
Also, not enough science mumbo jumbo in this chapter.
| A chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Just wanted to say that aftermath 2 in ch. 28 wasn't subtle at all, no idea how some people didn't get it.
| ilikebluepineapples chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Oh, excellent. I like that Hermione has a few things up her sleeve; her thought processes had seemed a bit too simple for a girl of her purported intelligence. You don't need the intent to kill to have the intent to win a strategic battle game! Hopefully.
And Pettigrew isn't Scabbers? Darn. That was a fun plot line! Oh well, at least you're not making Sirius actually evil or anything, so I will probably survive.
Poor Harry. Good chapter!
| firedraygon chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Oooh, mind games galore coming up! I'm excited with this three-way match-up! Haha, and 'Harry Potter Day' indeed. At least he has some refuge from the world.
The whole time travel plot twist thing with Bill is amusing. I like how you insert little parodies in here. Great work!
| HarryGinnyTonks chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
the ending of this chapter (29) was great. Good to see Harry still has a little of the 11 year old orphan who misses his parents. Very well done.
| Dragon Man 180 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Yeah, kind of hard to celebrate with everyone when your parents died on that day. I can't wait to see the armies clash, but I can just see Hermione reading Sun Tzu's Art of War for tips and using magical mortars and bazookas for her side. Get some muggle born students good at video games and they'd do nicely as gunners.
| DoubleC chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Oh, no, usually she sounds even worse than a goody-two-shoes. But this Draco versus Granger bit is quite enjoyable, in a sort of enemy-of-my-enemy way. Also, much intriguing. What's her game? I'm confused with all this plotting. Who wants what why?.. Guess it'll be explained further on.
The story about Bill - that's the stuff of nightmares! You should warn for such things. Well, you shouldn't, but you all but creeped the hell out of me. *shivers* Quelle horreur. Don't see why Harry and Granger found it funny, at all.
Quirrell is evil, of course, but can be funny. Never noticed that before.
| Miss Cow chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I like your idea about Harry Potter Day.
| Raven3182 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Have I ever told you how much I love your Hermione? She's great. Absolutely wonderful. Please keep giving her larger roles in your chapters like you have for the past two.
As always, your update has me intrigued and I can't wait for the next. Thanks for writing!
| WaxWings chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I like this story, and like the updates. I am little dissapointed to see the Sirius plot sidelined the way it is. I am sure you know where you are going, but I am concerned. I would like to see Sirius innocent, even if Pettigrew is not hiding with the Weasleys.
| Lord Jeram chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Very disappointing. I have been reading this story ("fanfiction", if you will) since the start, but I have swallowed my minor quibbles and annoyances with the tone, overly pedagogical attitude and terminology, and author soapbox - partially because I kind of like the singularity approach you came up with, so I don't have a real issue with that part, although obviously I disagree with your religious decisions, considering my similar starting point but vastly different endpoint.
Harry Potter has a terrible characterization, but that's typical for all HP fanfiction, so it's forgivable. Hermione less so. Snape and Quirrell are mostly all right, and I'm pleased not to see Clichéd Manipulative Dumbledore which has become so commonplace these days.
What is my sudden issue with the story?
Two things, actually.
1) Dates? Love Interest? I don't buy it for a second. They are far too young. And personally, the idea of forcing them together arbitrarily heartily infuriates me. Girls gossiping about it I believe, but Harry seriously considering the idea? No. Plus I don't think the pairing makes any sense, if any does. But at least you aren't converting Harry into a something he genetically is not.
2) Random Schizophrenic Bill Weasley change. So we take from this either that the book Harry reads is just wrong (possible, it's a conspiracy book) about Wormtail just being a rat, or you've made a significant change to canon. That isn't really a problem, but the manner in which you did it? Harry dismissive and derisive of Bill? Hate it.
3) "Like many here I've never read the original story but am in love with this one (sic)" WHAT? It's one thing to just read a fanfiction with a genre or setting you are generally unfamiliar with - but to love this version WITHOUT even knowing the original? For shame, people. This isn't Twilight we're talking about here.
But I'll withhold final judgement, naturally. These aren't dealbreakers - yet.
| Guile chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Are we really surprised that Hermione is more progressive than Magical Britain on the subject of women's rights? No we are not.
I find myself actually looking forward to Harry getting his ass handed to him by way of Granger. It's a strange feeling, considering I have been rooting for him this whole time.
Unless Aftermath 2 was just a parody of all those fanfics in which Snape is really secretly a sensitive fellow deep down and only in need of a good woman (well, schoolgirl) to realize it so that they can then engage in all kinds of pedophillic and often fetishistic sex, then no, I missed it.
| Wittgen chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
So Ginny's love of Harry is so famous that people at Hogwarts know about it even before she's started going there? That seems like a bit of a stretch.
| Nigita chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
What fun! I can't wait for more exploration of various sets of relationship triangles between Hermione/Quirrell/Malfoy/Potter.
Love the dialog in this chapter, especially Hermione/Quirrel and "Drakey"/"Hermy." I see that Draco noticed his confusion.
The meaning of the chapter title was clear to me.
You're jettisoning some of the most emotionally powerful material in the books (from what is arguably the best book in the series, too). That's fine; it works. But I think there are some places you can't go with it; at least, not yet.
Harry laughing about the Weasley family rat story is a plausible and perhaps logical way for him to react to a silly conspiracy theory story about people who mean nothing to him. But because it runs completely counter to one of the emotional anchors of the original series, Harry's deriding and dismissing the Weasleys-who are richly empathetic characters for most people-not to mention blowing up a favorite plot point (even if Harry's observations are clever and true) unravels a bit of the empathy you wove into his character in chapter 27. I guess it's a fine line between likable egoism and off-putting snobbishess. He's got a toe over, here.
Great chapter! I'm looking forward altogether far too much for the next.
Thanks for writing!
| Violet Shadows chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Could be I just forgot, but I don't remember this event being alluded to very much: it'll be interesting to see how you play it.
| Peregrinate chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Aww, poor Harry. "The Day the Dark Lord Killed my Parents."
Go Hermione! Go Hermione! ) I love her. Rooting for her, all the way!
| anon chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Like many here I've never read the original story but am in love with this one. Awesome chapter!
| celopmuh chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Okay, I don't say it was bad, but you should know what kind of emotions you evoke. I don't know who (Sirius or Pettigrew) was guilty in your version of events, but reading about Harry laughing about Sirius Black made me feel a little sick. And I'm not even a huge HP fan.
(For the record, recent Harry-Snape conversation about Lily made me laugh.)
Looking forward to the conclusion of this Army business.
| EliAndrewC chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I haven't read any fanfiction since high school, and now I find myself telling all my friends to go to to read some Harry Potter story.
That's how good your story has been... for the love of God please keep it coming!
That is all.
| cheekylildevil chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
You see, this is what your writing should be like, and how it used to be. You never know exactly what is happening, but it all makes sense eventually. Congrats on getting your ability to write like this back, I thought you'd lost it but am so glad I was wrong.
| deitarionSSokolow chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Now you're starting to make too many changes without tying them together obviously enough. (Black and Pettigrew) That risks making the readers feel adrift in an overly unfamiliar setting... and that's never good. There are certain types of unfamiliarity you want to avoid.
The key to a good divergent fanfic is keeping the reader in a "I don't know what's going on, but I'm secure in the knowledge that it still originated in the reality I know" state. You're running the risk of getting into "I have no clue how this relates to the Harry Potter I know and I'm having trouble staying interested".
That's why my rule of thumb for divergent stories is to make all changes derive from a single divergent event that's not overly far removed from what the reader can see.
| AngelForm chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
So we have a whole new dynamic with the armies.
I’m guessing they already know stunners? Or at least something disabling but not fatal.
| Gogolu chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
| Pinky chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Nitpicks wrt the "You have a cookie!" paragraph:
-After the expansion of Bill's case to a plural generalization, "Guy" initially struck me as another personal name, especially in this British context where Dumbledore's familiar is named "Fawkes". I got temporarily stalled trying to remember whether there was someone named "Guy" in canon or whether you'd created a new character by that name.
-Considering that St. Mungo's is so isolated from mundane medicine that surgical stitches are an alien concept, can they really give routine "schizophrenic break" diagnoses and antipsychotic medication? Their admissions criteria only seem to cover injuries caused by external (and usually magical) causes anyway. The only loophole I can think of is ascribing Bill's onset to getting bitten by the rat and getting something nasty mixed into the wound- or maybe reversing the causes, if he was attempting twinnishly random experimental spells on the rat that provoked it into biting a potion or powder into his bloodstream- which might prompt a paranoid delusion in Bill that the rat was especially cunning, evil, and planning to take over the world. (Narf!)
| rosewinkle chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Harry Potter Day...it has a nice ring to it! XD
| Karg42 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
And Hermione finds her teeth! 'Gratz to her! There's a plot here that is holding everyone up to their knees and I can't for the life of me see it!
Oh well, the wait's half the fun when nothing affects you directly.
| Cecelia chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
"...with his head resting on his elbows"...?
| Arkh Cthuul chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
You crushed the peter Pettigrew Plot? Holy Cow, now I am really looking forward to YOUR Sirius Black Solution (and btw, allthough I really like your story so far, I DO ahve to agree: even with your rather fast update schedule, especially considering the usual size of the chapters, it does seem that youll take YEARS to reach book 3 at this point, which would be...not so good, as both inspiration and drive tend to drop if "nothing big" happens for too long...).
Anyway, another great chapter, which makes one think of some really scary theories for hermiones "Changes" indeed...
| Luiz4200 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
About Harry's theories on Sirius: How close.
| Rowan Mikaio chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I suspect that Hermione is going to win this first battle quite handily. Malfoy is going to be so scared of getting double-teamed that he's not going to think about staging an attack at all. He'll be wholly concerned with how he defends himself from two simultaneous onslaughts. Harry will assume that Hermione is going to be assailing Malfoy with him, and even if Harry does think to attack Hermione at some point, he'll be wholly unprepared for her brutal blindside. Harry is going to get cut down because he's busy attacking Malfoy, and Malfoy's going to watch, dumbstruck, as Hermione takes first Harry and then him out.
I do love this story, though. It's hilarious and one of the most mentally engaging stories I've read in a long time. I'm never quite sure how many steps behind the main characters I am, which is a wonderful change of pace.
| Loonynamelass chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
"I don't know if you know what a dentist is, Mr. Malfoy, but my parents are dentists and anything less than ten Galleons isn't worth my time at all."
I love General Granger! And thank you for the quick update. The most brilliant fanfiction on this site, and with a quick writer to boot. :)
| He Who Comes With the Dusk chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Well, the story is every bit as excellent as always. The more frequent changes in point of view as of late are quite welcome, and I really think you've done Hermione and Draco justice. They appear every bit as well developed as Harry, which I think is saying something.
Also, this has been bugging me: If Harry were to be given veritaserum, would he start answering in tautologies? (The location of Sirius Black is the location of Sirius Black!) I was merely wondering.
Thanks for the great chapter!
| SevereWrath chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
This was much better; got the point across.
Also, nice job building suspense.
| wob109 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Ahhh Hermoine is going to be so much awesome 3
| Entropic Specter chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
A Hermiarmy? Oho! Proceed. Really. Please. Please update soon.
| gwern chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
"She makes her hair really red, like stopsign red not Weasley red, and when she spilled hot tea on herself she turned into a black-haired boy until she got it under control again."
Y'know, if all these anime and SF allusions weren't so well done and in-universe, they would be really annoying. (Also, the inversion is a little odd. I hope we're not going to see the old 'pregnant Ranma' question in action...)
In general, this chapter is one of the best Hermione POVs.
I note with interest that Black's backstory is revised; I had taken the previous chapters as indicating that Black wasn't in Azkaban, but actually he is and the case against him is airtight and Pettigrew is innocent? I guess this means we can rule out a free Black as the person who wrote letters to Harry (incidentally, we haven't seen any actions by the letter-writer in ages).
"it was like being forced to play dodgeball in P.E."
I would have been deeply grateful to play dodgeball in PE, since I was good at it, as opposed to playing football or tennis.
For some reason, I really enjoyed this quick updating on evidence.
"The villain, leaning back in a simple wooden chair with her buckteeth clearly visible and stray chestnut curls drifting over her cheeks, faced the hero."
Speaking of criticizing canon for sillyness, isn't buckteeth a prime example? I mean, she's the daughter of *dentists* (as you are obviously aware), and she lives in a magical school whose nurses think nothing of growing an arm back.
(But then, it is Britain...)
Harry Potter Day is fun, and quite logical. Reminds me of Penny Arcade ( /comic/2007/9/26/ and /comic/2008/9/22/ )
| Baughn chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
She's a metamorphmagus?
Can I quote you on that?
| Carumati chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
Let me guess, he completely misses the troll.
Fantastic story, I think you'll probably shoot out 100 chapters by the time first year is over. o-O
| Tiky3000 chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
The weasley story is just so very much fun.
And Harry Potter day is just so very much painful.
| farwalker chapter 29 . 7/4/2010
I love that Hermoine is trying to establish herself as a separate person here.
And that Harry takes halloween as a personal day of mourning. It shows that he is indeed human