I rarely ever comment on fics - unless I have a lot of free time AND am not feeling lazy AND there's something unique and worth commenting. But this chapter was SOOO SOOO GOOOD that I couldn't resist. Oh wow! By Merlin's ******, this is spectacular!
I cracked up real bad when Draco saw his father. And then you - you, cruel author with no regard for my stomach which hurts from laughter - you decide to have Harry mock-grovel under Malfoy FOLLOWED BY MALFOY DOING THE SAME TO MCGONAGALL!
I this fic weren't already tagged 'complete', I'd bribe you with my whole bank account to finish it.

relatable reaction from Madam Malkin

Fair warning about this FF
it seems extremely promising with its intro and high rating
but its another pedofic some 20 chapters down the road. Another self insert trying to date and flirt with literal 11 year old girls. Is it even worth bothering saying kids their age dont act/speak like that? Never mind. Quit fantasizing about 11 year old girls as your relationship partners you satanic PoS

This chapter was just absolutely fantastic. Draco and Harry feeding off of each other in the robe shop made me actually laugh out loud and sort of hope he is a Slytherin even if that would make his life harder. So looking forward to many more chapters!

Dumbledore set the Potters up to die.

It is proven in FAERY HEROES

But if you doubt then remember in the books that Dumbledore somehow "talked" James into "loaning" him The Cloak Of Invisibility.

Why would they give Dumbledore the last best defense?

If they had The Cloak Of Invisibility when Voldemort arrives then Lily and Harry could have hidden and escaped.

James might have lived as well, or not...

But by taking The Cloak Of Invisibility Dumbledore ensured they would die.

Rowling wrote it, she may not have meant it, what is written is written.

I was feeling very blue today, owing to some awful news... and then I mindlessly scrolled past some random fanfics when I came across this. OH GOSH. I have a stitch in my side from laughing, and am sure I've pulled a stomach muscle... or 10. THANK YOU so much for helping me with this story. I really hope Draco and Harry become chums who prank the entire world like this. Ow. It hurts, and I'm still chuckling.

Lmao I am living for Harry just kind of deciding to be a little shit, and Draco joining in as soon as he catches on

This is awesome lol

I can't help but feel that is putting idiots in their place just as someone should.

My. God.

Poor Draco. He is going to be in sooo much trouble with his dad.

Are you going to change his house?!

I laughed so hard I hurt myself! and cracked my face!

With this chapter, I think I understand the amazing number of favorites for this story. The scene between Draco and Harry was so good. I laughed until I cried. I actually had a hard time reading I was laughing so hard. Thank you. I needed that.

Oh my word! What a brilliant chapter! I was belly laughing out loud at Draco and Harry’s interaction. I cannot wait to read more!

I am making noises somewhere in between dying hyena and strangled rooster. Harry and Draco need to be the best of friends because they will turn literally everyone's hair grey within days. Hours, even.

Я просто хочочу от 5 главы! Это шедевр

This has made me think of The Cursed Child. A Potter and a Malfoy laughing together and defending each other facing the people in charge. I enjoy this. At first, I was opposed to Draco and Harry becoming friends, but I love it now.

this chapter made me absolutely wheeze with laughter

Okay, so I don’t usually leave two reviews in a row, but damn I laughed so hard after McGonagall returned.

Oh I love this!

I have to say, congratulations wordsmith! I had positively no idea how this story could turn even more hilarious, and yet you've done it. If I wasn't already sitting, I would've likely shared the fate of Madame Malkin and her assistants. Excellent work!

This one still makes me wheeze every time. Pure gold!

Holy fucking shit, now I know why you said it gets going at chapter 5, I'm fucking heaving.

The world is not ready for this Harry Potter! muahaha!

I don't think I've laughed that hard at any Harry Potter fanfiction I have ever read before.

Crying in laughter cause of the end of this chapter. Thank you

I laughed so hard!

Oh wow,oh wow, oh wow
I ve never loughed as hard about a fanfic than now
This ending was great !
I am really really exited to read more XD
Regards Nina

Thank you for that fabulous laugh! I can really see Draco and Harry being friends based off that one scene; here's hoping. My fingers are crossed!

This...*laughing hysterically* this has been the best chapter in all HP fanfics I've ever read *wheezing*

i was wheezing

This scene was absolutely hilarious. I humbly thank you for the laugh.

This chapter gave me a GREAT laugh XD

The end of this chapter made me laugh so hard, there are still tears falling down my face. I'm right there with Madam Malkin.

Another Harry Potter author suggested this one, and I'm so very glad they did!

Yeah, a certain prof is going to be staggering-falling down drunk before getting Harry's wand

I like this version of the scene so much better

Lmaoooo. That was easily the best comedy sequence I have read in a long time

This. was. GOLDEN!

The scene of them getting fitted for their robes is absolutely hysterical

... oh dear God what have you unleashed upon the Wizarding world.

this was fun banter between Harry and Draco.

This is absolutely brilliant. The HP/Draco back and forth was hilarious.

I truthfully don't think any fanfiction has made me laugh this hard.
Thanks for the laughter :)

I'm reading this on the 'official' website and coming here to comment.

Uh, is the name of the shop really Moke Shop or did you have a slip of the finger while typing?

i am literally dying my mom is staring at me like im crazy but i cannot stop cackling what is this masterpiece?! how does someone write something so unexplainably hilarious!? the moment when draco started blabbing about wanting to get into Gryffindor because McG is a Gryffindor is what did it for me. I'm dead. I'm so dead.

BAHAHAHAAA-

I'm sorry- I can't-

MUAHHAHAHAHAAABABAAAHAHAHAAAA

JUST AWESOME!
How can anybody write like that?!
(No, not sarcastic, it's actually awesome).

Dear God I'm sooo dying from laughter right now and I don't even believe in god! This, this is beyond golden and I just can't express in words how freaking hilarious it is! Dear author, you just made my whole YEAR with this one chapter! And there's around a hundred more! Man, I'm so giddy right now!

I came here unsure if I disliked this version of Harry or the very „Reddit“ style of writing more, but then I found some of the reviews and decided to dislike those the most. But I’m still hooked, can’t deny that.

This was fantastic and hilarious.

You're a genius.

Since it wouldn't paste in the last chapter:

I wouldn't put my trust in hedge founds -not nearly as safe as their reputation would have it, and not all that profitable, compared to the options.

Then again, Harry is a scientist, not a stocks investor. And 11 years to boot.

He's right about the muggle vs wizard economy tho... Which is why I STRONGLY suspect the Goblins do something to the gold and solver that makes it appear fake to muggle tests or something.

If they hadn't, some muggleborn would have found out that he could sell gold coins for MORE than their face value in gold (if age can be determinated, and he can claim some pirate treasure of hos ancestors or the likes), then trade those muggle money to galleons (1G 5£, give or take a few pennies. According to the author.)

A Galleon weights 1.98grams (HP Lexicon)

Price of 1 gram gold in 1991 avragely 13$ (rounded down)

$ to £ in 1991 Avragely half.

So the aproximate (roughly) Value of 1 Galleon is ca. 2x (13/2) 2x6.5 13...again.

If you sell 1 Galleon for 13£, and buy a new one for 5£, you earn the netto sum of 8£ pr Galleon. Enough to buy 2 Galleons, and from there it escalates... what's the word... exponentially? (Constantly increasing in a quicker and quicker speed, rather than in a linear fashion)

Too tired. Lol Anyway...

All of this is WITHOUT factoring in the gold to silver value ratio.

My point is: What are the odds no smart muggleborn has not tried to exploit that system, sometime over the 517 years it has existed? (In 1991 -Potterwiki)

Math and economics aside... AWESOME fic! I hope it goes on through the entire Potter book-series! :D

(Or at least until Harry comes up with the OBVIOUS solution that there's no REAL need to kill Voldemort. -Just stick the soul-piece roaming around into an object where it can't do any damage, and -since no one BUT Voldemort knows how to set him free, no one can.

Plus, it would be useful for research on the soul, and the effects of splinching the soul. _)

...

Omg I think I just died of laughter I hope harry and malfoy get along like a house on fire at hogwarts too!

This is the funniest thing I've ever read dbjdjdjjdjjdjjjdhdhdjsk

"Burst into flames and die" xD
Mood.

Oh, Snape… What headaches this beast will cause you…

Someone definitely needs to make a movie out of this.

How did Harry know Lucius's name before meeting him? His name is not mentioned anywhere in the chapter before Harry says it...

That was like the best thing I have read in a while

Never in my 24 years of existence have I laughed so hard. I'm LITERALLY having asthma attack right now smh. I tip my hat to you good sir/ma'am. Marvellous. Simply marvellous!

XD oh man that bit with draco was great!

LMAOOOO that was so funny hahahahaha

I'm cracking up!
I am right there with Madam Malkin, on the floor laughing so hard!
And that last line..OMG Harry!

THIS IS MY FAVORITE SCENE OF FANFICTION I HAVE EVER COME ACROSS, IT'S A MASTERPIECE.

HAHAHHA LOL

Ok… that first line has me in splits

The Draco bit of him doing to too was so OOC that it kinda ruined this story for me already :/ hoping that doesn’t happen again because god that was cringe

Oh this will be fun. Ohohoho!

Who knew Draco had a sense of humor! What a gloriously hilarious scene. Thanks so much

laughing too hard to breathe but at least I can still read

I can barely breathe.

lol, im loving this

The end of this chapter is the funniest thing I've read in a long time. As soon as Draco started in on Harry I started laughing. Then poor Lucius. He must be so confused. I laughed so hard I cried. Thank you for this.

You said in chapter 1 that the story hits its stride in chapter 5 and having just finished chapter 5 I can understand why. I've just had a right old giggle and I'm already excited to read the rest of the story

Omg that was hilarious! Enjoying this so much... Hope Harry and Draco are friends!

Oh God I can't stop laughing

:D

I am a but a wisp of a soul from beyond this realm back to leave one last review of this chapter, for I have died whilst reading it.

Jokes aside though, this honestly has made me laugh so hard, I’ve re-read this chapter alone 4 times already because it is just ingenious. Thanks for writing hygiene.

This is so good oh my god

CHAPTER 5 HAS M MI N G AGHHHHHH IM LAUGHING SO HARD BUT ITS LATE AT NIGHT

Lord save me I'm wheezing and my family is looking at me like I'm insane.

Poor Draco, haha.

I'm in love. No questions asked.

oh god please help me this chapter makes me losing my mind

I feel like the more I read this the smarter I get

I was laughing so hard I started crying! I absolutely love this

It’s a borderline crack fic with little Sheldon as the MC, desperate to prove how smart he is at literally every turn. The comedy is kind of funny but not enough to keep me interested. Overall hard to read.

It’s so hard keeping quiet when reading this at 3.

I might be in love! Can a person love words on a screen? Don't care I do!

prehaps the funniest subplot ever read in hp fanfiction

Ok. That was bloody hilarious!

Honestly this chapter was awful lol if the story continues like this then I have no idea how this lasted this long lol

I laughed out loud for a solid 60 seconds. I literally could not stop giggling.

LMAOOOOO WHAT HAHAHAHA I LOVE THE OBNOXIOUS COMPLIMENTS PART!

This is so funny but what the hell is Harry saying? I don’t understand half the stuff he says lol

Couldn't stop laughing! I'm pretty sure my mom thinks I've gone mad lol.
haven't read something as great as this in a long time!

Well now, I've sufficiently worried my cousin after I started wheezing and then proceeded to cackle once again and end up wheezing and coughing, in dire need of a glass of water. I haven't a pretty or healthy laugh, you see.

However, this masterpiece of hilarity would send me cackling away any day. I simply can't get enough and I've just begun this wondrous journey. And to think, I can look forward to 661,619 words of beautiful chaos.

harry is hilarious, lol.

I AM IN TEARS I LOVE THIS ah finally some quality fanfiction

The end bit of this chapter is one of the funniest things I have ever read. It caused me to actually laugh out loud for a solid 3 minutes. I am very glad I was not around other people while reading this as they would have given me strange looks. Thank you so much for brightening my day

I. Can't. Stop. Laughing. Thank yo for this!

I am absolutely pussing my pants with laughter literally wheezing from my hysterics at 1:30 in the morning. I'm sure my neighbours are loving me right now lmao. Great chapter

oh my god. I read about fundamental attribution error before but I didn't expect a chapter using the theory in such a HILARIOUS way. Brilliantly done!

AHHH THIS IS ACTUALLY THE BEST THING I HAVE EVER READ. I was so scared I would wake someone up because I kept laughing every 5 seconds. Please let Draco and Harry become friends!

Yeah, you killed me. This chapter sent my ribs to the moon. I havent laughed this hard in a while.

This is pure brilliance haven't stoped is amazing like 100/10 a rating

Draco and Harry's introduction and overall scene with Lucius and McGonagall was just priceless!

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Wow, this chapter is seriously well written

That interaction was perfect

Oh my god! Harry and Draco are killing me!

this is genuinely so hilarious “burst into flames and die”. in tears my GOD

This chapter is pure gold. At the end I found myself lost for words (rest asured that that doesn't happen very often). For the first time in my life I literaly couldn't stop laughing. Thanks for that

hi,
i am liking your novel as i read through. it's written so wondurfully. Hope future chapters follow the same rythm. But, i didn't understand how malfoy started saying stuff about liking Harry Potter or joining Gryffindor out of no where. How was what Malfoy said related to Harry's previous behavior.

This made my day :DDD

This was fooken hilarious

I love this chapter it's so funny I cracked up so hard. Love this story so far!

Absolutely loved this chapter. Harry's interaction with Draco had me laughing till I cried.

I'm wheezing!

I literally cannot stop laughing. Thank you for that.

Omg I’m dying

This was absolutely hilarious! He defused the Malfoy situation before anything bad could happen, without pandering to illogic. I adore this Harry and his rational, chaotic-seeming mind!

That chapter was entertaining. Poor Malfoy!

Oh my god. This is ridiculously perfect. I'm laughing so hard right now!
Keep on Writing
~LiB

I'm so done. God this is so freaking funny!
I nearly choked on air.
Seriously, the abrupt mayhem is outrageous.
My jaws hurt from too much cackling.
Help~

This was the most perfect thing ever, actually made me laugh. Thanks for that.

Bahaha I love the idea of both Lucius and Minerva never getting over their house rivalry and the fact that they were both horrified to hear their respective child express admiration for the other's house

Eu não aguento ...Essa foi a MELHOR CENA de todas as que eu já li .Curvo-me diante da sua grandiosidade, eu quase morri tentando não gritar de rir ,porque são 3:34 da manhã e meu pai esta dormindo

I couldn't stop laughing at the scene w/ Draco. As a hardcore drarry shipper, i absolutel this interaction. XD

I'M LOSING MY MIND THIS CHAPTER IS HILARIOUS!

the author is right the final scene in this chapter made laugh so much

Goodness! That was hilarious! Now excuse me I'm going to continue reading this amazing story.

brilliant

IM CACKLING AND ITS TWO IN THE MORNING AND IF I WAKE UP MY PARENTS IM DEAD

Hilarious! This chapter just brightened my day! Harry (and all the other characters, too) are much more natural in this fanfiction than in the first book itself. They're less cookie cutter and uptight. I'm very impressed with what I've read so far, and I've learned a lot, too!

Wow just wow... I am laughing so hard ...lolllll
This fic makes me its fan just from 5 chap.. ...
Amazingly awsome

I am calckaling in my seat. I LOVE THIS

This chapter left me laughing like crazy and offered me giggles whenever I thought about it.

oh my God I died of laughter at Draco and Harry's meeting. Much more entertaining than the original lol

Actually choking from laughing too hard. Poor Mcgonagall, she's actually encouraging him to be worse and doesn't even know.

hey. I don't have the habit of writing reviews, but sometimes certain pieces of literature deserve all the praise they can get. That scene with Draco Malfoy, pure gold. Haven't laughed that hard and long for a long, long while. Pretty sure a good 70% of your readers are sticking for that scene alone. Obviously I'm only at chapter 5, but I'm looking forward to the rest of the story. I hope you never quit writing, it would be a tragedy.

wow here i was thinking this would be a run of the mill story then 5 ch in im cracking up laughing

THIS WAS WHOLESOME
OMGSSS I LOVE THE INTERATION OF OF DRACO AND HARRY
AND WHEN LUCIUS AND MINERVA CAME

I normally don't review until I've read the entire work and have something to comment upon. This chapter, however, left me gasping for breath. The scene in Madame Malkin's is brilliant! Everything about it was perfect. Thank you. xx Fleur

I just love this chapter

I have been giggling hard the last 4 chapters.
But this one had me laughing so hard I fell off my bed and woke up my puppy. XD
This is just amazing

Wow, I laughed really hard on this chapter.
I just started this fic and I can already know that I will be reading all night instead of sleeping.

That was one of the most hilarious things I have ever read how do you write such mind-boggling amazingness

I am rereading HPMOR for the third time now. It is so great. Thanks for writing it

that was hilarious

lol I love ch5 it was so funny I couldn't stop laughing just the thought of Harry and Draco doing that to everyone randomly just to get a laugh lol love it :) the panic attack Mr. Malfoy and McGonagall just to hearing what house the other waned to be stored in when they showed up lol

I gotta say, that whole getting measured for robes was amazing! I wish something like that had been in the books XD

I love this chapter!

This is literally the best thing I've ever read! Like, Draco Malfoy can actually be funny. But one thing: Are you a scientist or how do you know all this?

I was was reading the begining of this story in a pub on my mobile. It's great that I moved to my car just before Harry's interaction with Malfoys and decided to finish reading the chapter in my car. If I didn't, people would call the nearest institution to pick up a maniac who is rolling on the floor and crying while laughing like a madman for no reason.

...yes, I actually cried from laughter.

i'm literally crying this is hilarious!

Apparently a Harry with a scientific background is not so good for the Wizarding World.

I haven't laughed so hard in some time!

LOL. that's the only thing i have to say about this chapter. thought it couldn't get funnier

Ok, I have been laughing all along, but this chapter made me fall out of my chair and that cats are looking at me with great worry as if they think the food lady might just die and then they will never be fed again. Oh, that was wonderful!

This was the best chapter I had read so far in any fanfiction and trust I have read a lot of them. Keep up the good work, my friend!

I haven’t laughed that hard at a story in a long time. Thank you for that exchange.

So so funny...

I've seen this story so many times, but I finally caved to read it, and I was actually doubled over with laughter, nice man!

I forgot how hilarious this story is. I love it. I almost had an asthma attack when Draco started on about wanting to be in gryffindor

When I was reading the scene where Harry was messing around with Draco, then Draco to Harry, Harry to Lucius and Draco to Minerva, I laughed so hard I cried. There's still tears in my eyes even now. I was picturing the Spiderman meme (the one where they're all pointing?) the entire time. Marvelous!

Laughing so hard right now

I am speechless...
This... Thing... is a fucking masterpiece and I'd hear none the less.
Oh, i don't even know if i'm worthy enough to even review it.

GAH! I'll sacrifice my firstborn to make this canon!

Omg I can’t breathe. I’m laughing so hard, no matter how many times I read this the scene in the clothing shop gets me every time!

I'm absolutely cracking up! Absolutely brilliant! I really needed that laugh!

This was great! I laughed so hard! Can't wait to read more.

Brilliant! *wheezes*

Very funny!

She saud to not set the shop on fire.

There were many more options to choose from.

Mistakes were made.
In addition to those made by your characters, who truly only inhabited unfortunate space-time coordinates, I read this with less than optimal time allowed and, much worse (for me, and especially for my standing with my co-workers) at work.
It was so worth it.

ROFL

I'm re-reading this and I compleatly forgot how fantastic this scene is...like I'm acually crying right now this is so funny. Thank you for writing such a glorious little piece of comedy!

Ha ha ha! OMG that was funny!

Oh my God this is the funniest thing I've ever read. I literally was ROLLING ON THE FLOOR LAUGHING AND I AM NOT EVEN EXAGGERATING!

Nice book

This is the best chapter of Fanfiction ever written. Period.

Speaking of Hermione, I know that this book is already written and such, however, I'm really hoping that Hermione is as or more intelligent than Harry is now. Because most of the reason I read Harry Potter is to watch the lesser fraction of the Golden Trio be ridiculed and trumped by Hermione. To have Harry significantly more intelligent than my favorite character would make me QUITE upset...

My throat hurts quite badly and I have nearly succeeded in bringing on one of my daily migraines. How? Why? So glad you asked. It is because I am laughing so hard and loudly at the first meeting of Harry and Draco. My word that was perfection. giggling... which doesn't hurt quite as much as the howling, not an exaggeration, laughter I was doing a few minutes ago. If the police show up because the neighbors called them, I'm simply going to tell them to read this chapter...

his

This is HILARIOUS-
Poor Draco. That was so funny- I hope they become friends.

Amazing explanation of fundamental attribution error. It's lucid to me now - judging someone based on outward behaviour without understanding the context and the situation.

Ich krig mich nicht mehr ein.
Hahahahahahahahaha

This is one of the funniest chapters I've read in my whole fanfiction career and it spans a decade. 'THE Draco Malfoy." And Draco following along in the wake of the insanity. So good.

Dear lord, laughed so hard tears came to my eyes.

Oh my goodness. This chapter had me laughing so hard. My sister literally came into my room and said I couldn't laugh that loud because had she been asleep she would have woken up. This is great. I'm disappointed in myself for not reading this sooner. I hope I get to see more of these antics in future chapters.

Hahaha I can't believe it! I can perfectly picture this chapter and I love it! poor McGonagall, if Harry somehow enters in Griffindor and not in Ravenclaw she will need more than a drink of wine!

Very funny, though not likely for Draco to react like that.

I was literally crying after this chapter. I was in school and in the cafeteria. I was not making noises appropriate for that setting and many of my friends were concerned as to my well-being.

Too lazy to log again... 1) Love the recognition that economics is a science 2) Not all fundies are diabolical agents of entropy (or so I’m told by a friend of a friend). 3) Love your Harry, sense of humor and brains, tell him if he hasn’t earned a Fields medal or the Noble prize or taken over the Wizengamot in eight years the friend of a friend who is up to here from having to explain arbitrage to college graduates who think they get the concept but really don’t, would love to offer him a position. Join the dark side, we have cookies and books and magazine compiles of Astounding Stories and old Del Rey editions and no moral qualms about reasonable grown up expenditures on a company expense account.

holy that was so funny, cracked me up so hard i had tears in my eyes

The whole scene at Madam Malkin's is making me bust a gut. And Harry telling Prof. McGonagall to go have another drink. Hilarious!

Ok, this was a great chapter. Made me laugh way too much

Great in enjoying this great laugh and good clean comedy. Please keep it up

This scene with Harry and Draco in madam malkins is the absolute greatest

just read the first five chapters and finally understand why this popped up when i searched for the best harry potter fanfiction...
the part with draco was the best .

I AM DYING OH MY GODDESS THAT IS POSSIBLY THE BEST DRACO/HARRY INTRO I HAVE EVER READ

oh dear god. ... " IT IS YOU! " ROFL! way to break the universe!

I have never laughed so hard in my entire life! this isn't my favorite genre of HP fanfiction, but ive never enjoyed one so much. i was literally rolling with laughter!

This is so funny! Am laughing so hard i can't continue reading.

It was this scene with Harry and Draco that makes me think I’ve already read this fic. Though maybe I didn’t finish it last time. Thank you for that laughs, I needed them

omg! Brilliant. I actually woke my partner up by laughing at this.
Brilliant.

Oh my god! This is the most wonderful story I have ever read. I am dying of laughter. Such craziness, such amazement, I am going to recommend this to everyone I know. Even those who are not harry potter fans would greatly appreciate this.

Omg Draco and Harry trying to out-fanboy the other is the funniest thing I think I've ever read. Each of them saying they are going to try and get into Slytherin or Gryffindor while Lucius and Minerva hear is the best thing I've ever read. Oh my God I hope they can be friends. That's hilarious.

That was the fucking best xD

The back and forth with Draco is so funny. I have read this chapter a dozen times over the last year and still laugh every time.

Oh, you've up and made me laugh. I love that Harry and Draco meeting scene where they keep joking about fans, up to the point of both of them saying they'd love to be in unexpected Houses, to the adults' horror. Oh, and the aftermath of that with McGonagall and the people in the shop.

so brilliant, oh those two boys just became best friends, house on fire and gasoline sort of friends.

Wow. Just wow. I've read some pretty amazing fanfictions before. But this one has taken the cake by the 5th chapter. Fortunately, I still have 117 chapters to enjoy. Unfortunately, that will probably only last me to tomorrow. Well done. Be proud.

Holy shit! Fuck. This is comedy gold.

"they want to shake hands with a bad explanation". Ha! Love it.

Eeee, I love his meeting with Draco. I can't wait to see more of them together.

Ha!

This chapter is most likely one of the funniest things I've ever read, I was wheezing by the end of it!

I forgot, somehow, how dangerous this story is to my ability to breathe.

this is great

I died.

I read the first few chapters of this a while ago and am now coming back to read it again, and i must say i forgot about this scene.

This is, by far the most hilarious scene i have ever read in my entire life.

Im not kidding right now.

Im in a crowded airport, waiting for my delayed flight, and start silently giggling, the way you do when you need to hold it in and your face reddens and your eyes start to tear up and-

Honestly, THANK YOU for the feat of making me laugh so hard i cry

I CAN'T BREATHE. OH MY GOD. I can see why other reviewers said they were cracking up. I haven't laughed this hard at a fic since one where Draco was sorted into Hufflepuff. Poor Professor McGonagall. I hope to God Draco and Harry become best friends. That was BRILLIANT. Will reread this chapter in the future, if I'm ever concerned that I have too much oxygen and need to stop inhaling correctly for five minutes or so.

OMG that was so funny! I'm on the floor, too!

good

I LOVE THIS CHAPTER SO MUCH IT MAKES ME GIDDY AND MAKES ME LAUgH OUT LOUD THIS IS GREAT AND REALLY BRIGHTENED UP MY DAY

The woman might be genuinely scared of Harry by now. She's gone pray everynight that he doesn't turn dark.

Gosh i ship drarry so much, but i doubt any romance will come out of this, so i'm holding on to maybe a friendship. I do doubt that though because i've read books where they're best friends, then they go to school and become arch enemies and i'm like WHAT!? Its a real problem. Anyways, xoxo 3

I'm laughing SO HARD at the time of finishing his chapter. I have literally tears in my eyes.

Oh my fucking god I think I died Absolutely amazing,I can’t

oh my I'm wheezing this is my favourite

This may be the first time I’ve crack up laughing out loud from anything in a long time. This might just make the rest of my shitty week bearable.

Oh I'm gonna love this fanfic

Oh that whole scene between Harry and Draco at the robe shop had me cracking up! This is definitely a different take and so far quite interesting. I'm excited to read more.

I laughed. And then laughed some more. I think these two should be friends now. That was hilarious.

Oh my fucking god. I genuinely have not laughed this much at a book in a long time and I’m only on chapter 5- thank you.

OK, this was hilarious

This is great

Good good

I had to face a wall lmao

Oh. My. God. I'm pretty sure everyone in the house now thinks I'm insane because of how much I'm laughing. Well thank you for that... NOT! Anyways, this story is awesome and I'm glad I found it. :)

I'm honestly not sure I'll survive this whole fic; I've about died laughing four times in as many chapters. I cannot wait for what comes next.

Well, this chapter certainly crackec me up.

Now I know why it gets into its swing by Chapter 5 lol

Thanks. I couldn't breathe and now I'm dying. I had to reread the entire thing and was nonstop laughing for literally 5 minutes. When I die, you're paying for my funeral you murderer

Oh God. That was awesome. I chocked with laughter.

I have been greatly amused this whole time, but this chapter had me in stitches. Oh, please let Harry and Draco be sort-of friends after this.

I am crying with laughter. This is so perfect and amazing. I am soooooo this was written.

HA HA HA HAAAAA, most hilarious Harry - Draco - Lucius - Minerva scene ever!

OMG THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST CHAPTER YET. I LOVED IT. I LITERALY LAUGHED OUT LOUD AND ITS LIKE 1:36AM HERE AND I GET IN TROUBLE IF IM STILL UP BUT THIS BOOK IS SOOOI WORTH IT.

Thank you for a brilliant chapter.

This reminds me of In Other Lands- have you read it?

...*hysterical giggles* I haven't laughed that hard in a while. That was completely brilliant.

I'd just like you to know that you are a genius and I fell off my bed I was laughing so much and my parents think I'm insane now. You are amazing. Do not let anyone tell you otherwise. You just made my life so much better after a week of exams

Delightful. :)

I can officially say that I died of laughter and came back to the land of the living so I can continue reading this masterpiece. Dude this is a bazillion times better than the original, I'm seriously hoping Draco and Harry become friends.

rip if you don't see this, but this is amazing already. Thanks.

Ridiculous but amazing plan on how to deal with the praise, honestly. I love how Draco just catches on and keeps going too;).

I was literally crying with laughter from this chapter!

I get the feeling that Harry Potter and Draco Malfroy will end up to be great friends this time around.

I'm crying here. This is too funny. How do you come up with this? LOL

Self-stolen & auto-thieved

I'm dead. Lol

Selvstolen money.
My heart is swooning!
"... suck up to me" - people sucking up to Draco! What an awesome story!
The neighbours had to watch me giggling all the time.
That's so well done. - Outstanding

We can expect great things from him.

Thank you very much for your time and love of writing

Most of this is painful, but the interaction between Harry and Draco in Madame Malkin’s was pretty funny. Other than that, Harry is such a pretentious little prick that I’m surprised you’ve written 122 chapters in which he wasn’t murdered.

Oh gosh i laughed so hard i almost threw up...
lesson learned i suppose, i will never eat and read your fics.
But bless you and your writing and thank you for making me laugh.

5 chapters in and i'm already trying to control my laughter

This scene in Madame Malkins shop may be the best version of it I've ever read xD I believe me, I have read many, many if them!

This is sheer brilliance.

I haven't read this chapter yet and I won't be today but please please tell me you write real fiction... This is barely five chapters old and I'm absolutely in love with this

He might be funnier than the marauders and the twins combined

This is soooooooo funny

im dying

:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D:D

ROTFLMAO!

I THINK I DIED
FROM LAUGHTER
IM DYING FROM LAUGHTER
HELP
SEND HELP QUICKLY
BEST FIC EVER
IM DEAD

There are few books that make me actually laugh, but this chapter had me crying.

I’m not sure if this is Harry Potter or a descendant of Obi-wan Kenobi cause “the troll is strong with this one”

Holy fffffffffffffffffffrick that was an absolute comedy routine and a half, someone needs to animate that lol

Harry is a complicated boy, smart but a boy with ideas problematic.

This...went places... O.O

you made me cry.
out of laughter.
that has NEVER happened before.
I am honored to have stumbled upon your story.

I've been laughing at this for the last 5 minutes.

You know, what this story needs is an adult to translate this Harry's gratuitous over-explanations for everyone else.
"Do you know what fundamental attribution error is?"(insert long over-wordy blurb that beats around the bush- hell, works halfway around the whole hedgerow- before getting to the point, sort of.)

McGonagall, or Anyone else who isn't a college professor trying to pretend to be a little boy: "What?"

Mr. Translator: "Okay, lemme translate. (To McGonnagal) He's saying it could have been a fluke. But everyone jumped to conclusions, even though noone was there to see what happened."

Or at the very least harry could have THOUGHT the long over-wrought explanation... and then SAID something far simpler and far more likely to come out of a ten year old's mouth.

I am thoroughly enjoying this fuckery!

HAHAHAAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAB WHEN HARRY STARTED GUSHING ABOUT DRACO I KNEW THIS WOULD BE AN ENTIRE MEME AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAAHHAHAHAA

I'm going to use the one review per chapter rule to say this...

I'm crying with laughter right now! This is the hardest I've laughed in such a long time. Thank you sir! :D

The last scene - God i am litterally dieing over here! I just may burst something because i can't stop laughing hahah

Amazing dialogue, well done! I didnt get the Draco Gryffindor bit, though. Was he playing along? Why would he do that? Anyway, great story.

Oh my gosh I'm doing my own silent hysterical giggling here! (trying to get kids to sleep) I love love love that whole conversation with Draco in the robe shop. I really want to read it again right now. Really really hilarious from everyone and their reactions. Mcgonagal will be praying that Harry isn't in Griffindor.

This is utterly, utterly glorious. I've been snickering all the way through so far and have no expectation of it stopping. Very good work indeed.

pfffffOHGODIMDYINGHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA

This is the funniest thing I've ever had the pleasure of experiencing. I was absolutely wheezing with laughter. Your Harry is brilliant and everything I aspire to be.

I hope you don't mind my French, but that was absolutely beautiful. Abso-fuckin-lutely BEAUTIFUL.

3. chapter and I'm already asking myself If this is a Try not to laugh challenge

How did Harry know Lucas name

OH MY!
LOVED IT

Jesus, I burst out laughing right around when McGonagall came into madam malkin's - that was fuckening HILARIOUS, man!

Do you know how hard it is to laugh at something in a story? Like it's not hard to physically laugh, but when people stare at you and ask 'why are you laughing' There is absolutely no way you can explain the joke to them! All you can say is 'funny part' which kills the moment entirely.

Curse you! God I needa go get some water, cause that was damn funny.

It is rare that I find myself laughing so hard at a story that I begin to feel lightheaded. This chapter has succeeded in doing precisely that. Thank you.

Harry, master of confusing flattery.

Chapter 2 and this is the best fic I've ever read.

Wow, I don't think I'll be able to read this unobtrusively, I've just hat a fit of laughter. Thanks so mcuh

Thank you

Why does Harry know about the sorting hat in Chapter 5 but not in Chapter 6?

I was recommended by a new friends of mine I just recently got in Harry Potter watching most of the movies never could get into the books were a bit to dry for me. I have to that Harry is a bit eerily similar to me using logic to explain everything taking a logical perspective and having a weird away moving forward sleep cycle so in short I can strongly relate to this story I must say I love your humor especially chapter 6 if you ever want to talk to someone who understands all of the scientific theories presented in this story drop me a line (message on site), if not well I must say I love your work

I fucking choked in the ending skit. It was marvellous...

YES, GE EVERYONE IN ON THAT JOKE! HOW COULD I MISS A FIC THIS GOOD?

I have no words for how hilarious that just was. Wow. Just wow. Simply outstandingly done. Astonishing. You deserve a fucking medal.

Que risa! Amo este Harry, súper divertido

I'M DYING! OMG, it took me a minute to realize that Draco was in on the joke, too. That is fantastic! xD

I can't even remember when I read a HP non-Snape-centriv fanfic. It hardly ever happens. Must habe been years ago - like at least a decade.

And I just stumbled across this story and didn't even really want to start reading it. I mean, really - a story without Snape in it is not even worth looking at. Right? And a story in the humor-category is destined to be a bore and utterly humorless in almost all cases. But then I saw all the reviews and decided to just have a kind of sneak preview to proof to myself that it is worthless to me.

And what do I get? One of the most hilarious things I have come across. Ever. Or maybe not even "one of the ... things", but actually THE most hilarious thing ever.

This is just incredible and I am still busy laughing my head off. I feel really sorry for the whole wizarding world with Harry in it. They won't know what hit them.

But now on with it - I have time for at least 2 or 3 more chapters, before I have to go to work.

This chapter is the funniest thing I've ever read in my whole
Life.

Oh my god! That was hilarious!

this is comedic gold and i am metaphorically laughing my ass off

XD I laughed out loud and people started staring. Gosh were has this been my entire life.

Ok, that was completely hilarious. Every single line of it. Jolly well done!

Omg I love your sense of humor. This story is going to be incredible!

Finally Harry has a decent sense of humor. This harry would be bound for slytherin though, although he reads and prizes knowledge he shows desire for gain and the cunning ability to achieve it.

I don't remember when I've last laughed as hard as I did while reading this chapter. Seriously, tears are streaming down my face and my stomach feels like it almost cramped up.

Lol. So hilarious. Wish I can say more but I want to read more first

I'm dying! I'm crying from laughing! :)

I've never laughed so hard! Great work :D

Oh. My. God. Those two shop assistants? One of them of me. I LOVE this version of Harry!

I know this fic is over, and has been for a long time, but I just started reading it and I had to review this chapter because I COULD BARELY BREATHE AND I COULDN'T EVEN KEEP READING FOR SEVERAL MINUTES THIS WAS AMAZING

Ok the previous review was meant for chap 5

This is one of the funniest things I've ever read. I really hope Harry and Draco end up friends!

Oh my gosh I loved this chapter it's so funny!

LMAO! I couldn't hold it in anymore. The two of them playing off each other so well and escalating was hilarious, and the stoic bystanders gradually losing the struggle to remain stoic in the background had a multiplier effect. McGonagall's barbed wit about Harry is great, too.

oh no
oh no
oh no
oh no
you are going to make me wake up the neighbors that live several acres away with my laughing, i
DO
NOT
WANT
TO
know
what the
rest of
the
chapters
are
like
but i do! but i do! oh no oh no I love your story
ill leave my own fic behind
just when I was getting good going
oh dear
i cant help myself
hopefully i'll get it all read in a day or two, like normal...if i dont spend an hour laughing at each chapter

OMG that was hilarious, do hilarious in fact, that i had to go back and read it again!

I'm dieing of laughter here :))

This is without doubt the best fanfiction I have ever read.
However, this is due to the fact that it is so far the only fanfiction I have ever read. Though I have read many other works and I find it difficult for anything to compare to this.

I used to ask "Why do people write fan fiction?" Well, now I know.

My sister is scared for my health after all the repressed fangirling and supressed giggles making me shake and gasp that this chapter caused me to have

OMG IM SVREAMING THIS IS SO FUNNY

My sides hurt from laughing! That was both amazing and hillarious!

Oh my fucking God, I am legit dying, this is the funniest story ever and I'm only 5 chapters in!

Dear Lord, I had to control my laughter.

I do not have the vocabulary to tell you how much I loved this chapter. I'm howling. Absolutely howling. I adore this story. I adore this Harry. You sir and/or madam are a genius!

"He was in a situational context where those actions made internal sense-" is now my new all time favorite line ever. I can not wait until this Harry meets Ron - or really any of the 'normal' eleven year old boys.

Omg this chapter is hilarious I'm laughing so hard I'm cryin

If you wanted people to die laughing, i think i might be close. I love it - the laughing part, not the dying.

THAT could not be any more funny. It is truly a work of comic genius.

Oh my gosh! That was one if the best things I've ever read! LOL!

OMG! DRACO AND HARRY SCENE WAS EPIC! I CAN'T STOP LAUGHING! BRILLIANT, ABSOLUTELY BRILLIANT! I'M SO LOOKING FORWARD TO THE REST OF THIS STORY! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA ;D

HOOKED!

THIS WAS SO FUN I HOPE HARRY AND DRACO BECAME BEST FRIENDS REGARDLESS IT WAS SO FUNNY HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Can't remember the last time a story made me laugh so hard I cried

WHY IS THIS SO FUNNY

So each chapter you remind me why I love precocious children. However, I don't necessarily want to review unless something in a chapter stands out.
Your ability to write humor is top notch. I'm still laughing ten minutes later.

oh my gosh, i am cracking up over here! THE LUCIUS MALFOY? BAhahahshaha

Oh...Oh God...ROFLOL! Draco, Harry, Lucius, and Minerva in Malkin's shop. Halarious!

McGonagall: "What was that distant explosion?"
Harry: "It may have been Lucius Malfoy's head detonating."

That was *glorious*.

I laughed so hard reading this I had to stop and calm down for a minute

i'm dying. this is /hilarious/!

I am so onboard for harry's sarcasm.
I mean, you got it down to a 'T'!

omfg this chapter though I can't deal. it's wayyy too funny

HAHAHAHA THIS IS SO FUUUN!

This is too deliciously funny for words!

OH MY GOD I LITERALLY BURST OUT LAUGHING AT "Lucius Malfoy? THE Lucius Malfoy?" THIS IS STUNNING

Beautifully written comedy and wit. Just lovely!

It's rare for me to laugh aloud at fanfic, but you have already achieved the feat two or three times in the first 5 chapters. I am so excited for the rest of this fic.

this is my favorite so far. i laughed so much. :) :)

Yeah, I understand how Madam Malkin and her assistants feel, I'm having a hard time too.

This is definitely one of my top 3 favorite chapters in this book! I laugh every time I read it! Also, I find it amusing that you say the story is thought to really get good around chapter 10, because the first 10 chapters are (in my opinion) the best of the entire story!

Oh that hurt to read. It was painfully hysterical. I STILL have tears of laughter trailing down my cheeks.

I laughed so friggin hard. XDDD

You almost had me crying, I was laughing so hard. Thank you. Good lord, those two boys are hysterical. Does this mean they're going to be friends?

lol I can't stop laughing this is so good

Favorite. Automaticly favorite. There is so much interesting-well-placed-science-fact in this magical world. Who say that we cant learn anything from fanfiction.
*sorry for bad english.

The scene between Draco Malfoy and Harry at Madam Malkins is beyond awesome. Especially when Dracos father comes in. And the decription of Lucius here... to the point and absolutely can see that Draco loves his father, and also why tis man probably has nearly the whole of wizarding Britain in his pocket... just great. As for Dracos words about wanting to be sorted into Gryffindor, especially in front of his father,and both McGonnagals and Lucius reaction... Bwahahahahaha! ROFL!
Priceless.

Brilliant chapter! I laughed so hard... For quite a bit. Stroke of genius the scene at Madam Malkin's.

OMG IM SO DEAD XD XD xD if i known i was gona love your story this much i would of started to read it sooner xD

This is hilarious! :)

Look, I'm sure you're tired of people saying this to you, and I'm sure I'm not the first to say this but; That. Was. Awesome. Reminded me of Fred and George. Thank you for sharing your gift.

Poor, poor Lucius Malfoy and Professor McGonagall, to be subjected to clueless Harry Potter, and impersonating Draco Malfoy!

Oh my God. I'm reading this at home at 11:22 and trying so hard not to die laughing. Holy Shit.

okay now i favorite this. That was brilliant

By almighty I LOVED the Madam Malkin shop scene. Seeing a hilarious and imaged though written in words like that.. ahahaa I was laughing for so long, took minutes to read the whole thing when I could usually do in seconds because each sentence was filled to the brim with hilarity and th ere was no way I was missing out on any thing. Am writing this review on mobile and I completely duck at texting on here so please excuse mistakes and customer am reading on phone. I just had to express immediately how amazing that chapter was. No wonder there are so many favorites on this s story, and this very story has a website all on its own!

'whatever dark power inhabits you, it is contagious' Estoy completamente de acuerdo. Hace mucho que no reía tanto xD

i am reading one line per minute. tears and stomachache really help concentrating when i'm not trying to catch air

Alright, so, I found this story FOREVER ago, read the first chapter and decided to put it away for later. I've finally gotten around to reading it and let me tell you this chapter ALONE just made my week! I started cackling so loud my aunt had to come ask me to quiet down. Thank you. This is brilliant. 3

Doesnt sound a lot like draco to be honest but okay.

God, I am a terrible reviewer. I will read the stories I love over a hundred times and forget to review. I desperately need to break that habit, for fanfictions like these deserve a parade of praise. I actually chuckled while reading this piece, although I was giddier than a child inside when I read the interaction between Harry and Draco at Madame Malkin's. Gosh, I want a hard copy of this perfect beauty already!

LMAO DRACO AND HARRY WHAT HAVE YOU DONE? You're killing me XD

Can you link Gizoogle somewhere?
This with Gizoogle is likely the most beautiful thing I have ever seen.

This is one of the funniest scenes I've ever read in any HP fiction. I am also loving Rational!Harry. You totally rock!

OMG! I love this so much. I did what Harry did once. Really well done.

Oh my god! Oh my god! I literally just hurt myself this made me laugh so hard! My sides ache and I had to stop and use my inhaler! Kudos to you! I can't wait to continue reading this!

《"I am so, so honoured to meet you!"
/
"Your son has been telling me all about you," Harry gushed on, hardly even knowing what was coming out of his mouth but just talking as fast as possible. "But of course I knew about you all before then, everyone knows about you, the great Lucius Malfoy! The most honoured laureate of all the House of Slytherin, I've been thinking about trying to get into Slytherin House myself just because I heard you were in it as a child -"
"What are you saying, Mr. Potter?" came a near-scream from outside the shop, and Professor McGonagall burst in a second later.
There was such pure horror on her face that Harry's mouth opened automatically, and then blocked on nothing-to-say.
"Professor McGonagall!" cried Draco. "Is it really you? I've heard so much about you from my father, I've been thinking of trying to get Sorted into Gryffindor so I can -"
"What?" bellowed Lucius Malfoy and Professor McGonagall in perfect unison.》

Oh my. It's hilarious

funniest shit i ave ever read

I have tears running down my face. 10/10.

OH MY GOOOOOOD!
HAHAHHAHAHA XDDDDDDDDDD
the scene at madam malkins was greaaaaaat !
HAHAHAHAH i laughed so hard :D:D

Entertaining.

Oh my GOD I just choked on my laughter that was absolutely HILARIOUS

Merlin! I just laughed my freakin' ass off! Harry is to DIE for! Great story, btw!

OMG, this is BRILLIANT.

Brilliant

Hahaha! The marauders would be proud!

THATS THE FUNNIEST PARODY I HAVE READ IN A LONG TIME!

Well, THAT was crazy!

Uh oh. Is Draco gonna be okay?
Aside from that... so very, VERY good!

OhahahahahahahahhaahahaOMG THAT WAS THE BEST EVER DRACO-HARRY MEETING EVER! I'M WHEEZING AND LAUGHING SO HARD MY SIDE HURTS AND THIS CHAPTER WAD SINGULARLY AWESOME!

No.. no,no,no, this can not happen. Harry and Draco and his father.. and the whole malkin's shop burting aout in laughter.. no, no, i never imagined such a scenery. it made me lauhg really... I wish I could shere this story with someone around me, but noone values potter fanfictions enough to read it in English what a pity. This chapter was soooooo much fun to read!:D:D:D thank you!

hysterical chapter.

I should not be reading this in the middle of the night in a student dormitory... I cracked up so bad that I woke everyone x)

Hysterical!
I can't breath!

I love your story so much. Keep up the great work don't let the haters still u down, if u have any boy of course. Chapter 5 made me die of laughter

Too funny! Getting Draco to profess a desire to be in Griffyndor for the win. Kali

Omg
This is hilarious
My mother just looks at me thinking that I finally lost it and I got my grandmother laughing along, and she doesn't even know what's funny.
Lol

LOVE the budding friendship!

I'm 5 chapters in and already starting to laugh to near tears at parts. This is just awesome.

This made me laugh so hard I cried and hurt my stomach! I love this story!

I'm DYING HERE O.O I cannot BREATHE XD draco and harry already look like they will be fast friends in this story XD liking the fact that draco can loosen upa bit :D VERY nice XD

1. Wonder who the mokeskin Hufflepuff is.
2. Can't recall reading about the door waving goodbye to them before. Oh well.
3. So they ran into a total of 3 well-wishers within the alleys of Diagon Alley... don't know if that's important, but okay.
4. Ooohhh, a "sharp look", huh? Thanks for the new synonym for a glare. I might be needing that.
5. Hm. Didn't notice that Draco was wearing a checkerboard-gridded robe pre-Hogwarts. That's cool.
6. "Unutterably delighted" is such a great bit of blubbering praise.
7. House Elf, the real backbone of Hogwarts.
8. That description of Lucius... HOT damn!
9. So much flattering vocabulary in this. Didn't know about laureate either.
10. Six minutes and four seconds in Madam Malkin's. And the description of McGonagall Lucius... (bring tips of the fingers of one hand to lips and kiss them) Magnific!
11. Final note: didn't notice the first time that Harry tried to use the fundamental attribution fallacy at the end there. Neat inclusion.

This was so great, Draco declaring he wanted to be in Gryfindor surprised me, even though it does make sense in the contest of the conversation.

You're killing me dude... God damn

Bloody Christ, I has to smother my face with a pillow to keep from waking my roommate. That has to be the most funny rendition of that scene I have ever read
Can't wait to read more!

WOW, It's been awhile since I last laughed this much at one chapter.
This is pure gold.

BOI

A prank of cunning and wit. Good job.

Okay, now I get why you have so many reviews. Poor, poor Minerva. She's gonna have an embolism by the end of the day at this rate. I can't even imagine how Harry will deal with Ollivander, but I can't wait to see it.

This fic is awesome! :D And I'm learning so much! I can't wait to read more! :D

GOD Bless, keep up the Good Work, and Keep Moving Forward! :D Amen! :D

This chapter is awesome and hilarious! The Harry and Draco scene is wonderful. I'm laughing so hard.

I thought this was an awesome story but I just can't get through it. You the author Have done an amazing job because, Hell 661 thousand words! But I just could not finish it. I don't want this to be a flame since I Applaud you for doing something that you enjoy and something that is a work of art.

YOU!
YOU'RE THE COMIC GENIUS THIS GENERATION NEEDS!
Never have I read something which has made me laugh so much from the very beginning goddamn

When I read this chapter, I laughed so hard that everyone around me though I was choking and needed CPR. Thanks.

OMG! OMG! OMG! I was cackling like a crazy person long before reaching the end of this chapter! I think I'm a little afraid of your brain. *g*

~Debbie

OMG this chapter, absolutely freaking brilliant, I laughed and laughed and there were tears. Your characterizations and reactions, the humorous exchange between Harry and Draco are just too lovely.

I just had one of the longest giggling fits ever over this. I'm rereading because I don't remember where I left off, and I just started laughing, and my mom and sister gave me the weirdest looks ever.

I am laughing so hard. This is literally the greatest fanfic so far that I have read so far. Absolute brilliance. Genius. I cannot even..by merlin...it's like...what have I been doing all my life? Harry really does do a number on people doesn't he?

Star, xoxo

I couldn't help but writing some review for this chapter because I've never laughed so much at reading any fanficfion as yours. I usually have some little problems with english fanfiction because English it's not my first language, but I was just unable to eat my breakfast while I was reading this for the bursting of laugh and I needed to thank you for giving me this moment.

I can't stop laughing out loud!

I CACKLED. I cackled like an actual crazy person. Holy hell.

So funny...

IM DYING

This is one of the best Fan Fictions that I've ever had the pleasure of reading! Harry is hilarious but brilliant in every way, your chapters are a perfect length, and your A/Ns on JK Rowling are genuinely creeping me out.
- Astoria

I'm only on chapter 5 so far, but I already love this story!

Hell I've only ever reviewed this early into a story once before and that was just because I wanted the 7000th review.

But dear Lord! I laughed myself out of bed and onto the floor! I was curious when I started liking this from the first chapter when you said it hits it's stride in the fifth, but now I understand.

It. Just. Gets. Better.

Thanks in advance for this story.

Learning and laughing at the same time. Glorious!

well, i am really sorry, bur i am not going to continue reading this story. too much scientific words. really sorry..

I'm already loving this story because I can't stop laughing even though I feel as if I'm somehow being tricked into learning...

That scene was too funny

"Hmm," Harry frowned. "I suppose you could be in on it too -"

Haha! This is great,

I solemnly swear that I'll never find another Harry Potter fic that would make me laugh louder and harder than this one chapter. I'm dying and we're not even in Hogwarts yet. I'm scared, I don't know if I want a Draco/Harry team up or not because of Professor McGonagall's sanity.
Wish me luck... I have over a hundred more chapters to go... I hope I would still be able to breathe
Ash

I had the distinct impression of Madam Malkin's state after Harry was left unsupervised for six minutes by Professor McGonagall; it was sheer hilariousness. Well written!

Oh my goodness, this is great. I know this story has been finished for like, ever, and already has so many reviews, so I hope it doesn't bother you to get anymore.
I LOVE all these random theories that Harry knows, and how they shape the story. It's a very interesting idea to incorporate into Harry Potter, and I'm interested to see what effects it has on the rest of the plot. DOES Harry get sorted into Ravenclaw? Does he never meet Ron or Hermione? Do he and Draco become friends? The encounter between them in this story certainly makes it seem like they could be. I'm hooked!

That was one of the funniest things I've ever read.

OH. MY. GAWWDS.

I haven't cackled this hard and choked on my drink this much while reading a fanfic in a long, long time. And I've had more than my fair share of drink-choking and fanfic-hunting.

The Malkin scene was priceless. This fic is priceless. I can't wait to continue reading.

I love this fic and the fact that Draco said he wanted to be a griff

.EVER!

The entire Madame Malkin's scene is hands-down, no questions asked, the best thing I have ever had the pleasure of reading.

Oh my god.

I was reading back over this, and, how does Harry know Lucius's name? I don't see anywhere he learns it. He could figure out that the last name is Malfoy, but how would he know the first name?

this is THE BEST thing i've ever had the pleasure of reading oh my god i'm laughing so much!

I laughed so much i couldnt read antmore because i had so many tears! Thank you! Great job!

Gosh, my belly hurts - legitimately hurts - from all the laughing. I'm crying! Literally crying from laughter. I don't think any other HP fic gave me such abs workout before.

Rowling Rays? lol

flipping brilliant

That last bit had me cracking up. I love your story so far, its really funny! 3

This is genuinely the funniest thing I've ever read, holy shit.

Oh my god you made my day with this conversation XD I laughed so hard my stomach was hurting... oh god thank you 3

OMG you are so, so, so funny! I love it!

Hi I was pointed to this story ages ago an started last night. Oh Sweet Baby Mauve! I laughed so hard I had a accident in my panties - twice now! Hope the rest is just as funny an good.
Ms Tinkerbell

THIS IS BRILLIANT! IT'S SO INCREDIBLY SMART AND HILAROUS! Okay... calm down... *Favorites it*

This chapter i swear got me histerical by the end

Omg! I just found your story, and have starts cracking up so much! I am loving the way you are portraying Harry. When I read in the first author's note that there were fanfictions this fanfiction, I didn't understand how that could be, but I get it now, after just 5 chapters.

I'm laughing so hard I'm cryyyyyyyying

That is bloody brilliant, I'm literally crying and laughing and woke up the whole house at 3am. You are the gift to the world, dear author. Thank you, I'm gonna praise your talent after some sleep in much more proper way. For now just need to stop crying. :D

Wow

I love how harry grovels to Lucius as that's my name! Its spelled the same and everything, suffice to say I get quite a few words about it, I might cosplay him to confuse my friends why I suddenly dyed my hair and carried a Cain.

This chapter was hilarious! I have tears in my eyes due to all the laughter.
If only this had been Harry's reaction to Malfoy in the books, I think it would have gone very differently! Draco's wish to be sorted into Gryffindor- and McGonagall's and Mr Malfoy's mutual reaction his statement was one of the best situations I could have ever imagined.

delightful!

it's 2 AM and here I am cackling madly at this chapter.. well done!
I should've started this story ages ago. and i feel smart when i understand the scientific stuff,you get extra kudos for that

Oh. My. Gods.

That was the best Harry/Draco moment I have ever seen in my life!

OMG LOL THIS IS ACTUALLY AMAZING
HYSTERICAL

HAHAHAHHA OMG IM DYING! I just had to review this chapter! That was the best; it totally made my day! And it got a million times better when Lucius and McGonagall got involved. Oh jeez...I don't think Hogwarts is ready for this Harry.

I just broke out into the loudest laughter of my actual life oh my gods.
I'm so glad I'm home alone, though I did startle the cat. Honestly I think the only reason it tickled me so much is because you went WELL BEYOND the rule of threes, and I had very much been hoping that you would as it's simply too good a gag to give up.
My god that desended into utter madness just as it ought to have 10/10 would read again you're my new god I'll pray to you every night that was marvelous.
I don't even give a damn how the rest of the story goes, you're my new favorite author. This is my new favorite fanfiction, I don't care this is just too much..
Write on:)

...is probably the hardest thing to learn in writing. It just doesn't translate easily from real life to the printed word. But you nailed it!

Harry and Draco are such trolls omg

This is getting annoying so I WONT be reviewing every chapter. But I am SO trying that trick on someone. It was so funny!

brilliant! loved it!

Best chapter ever

In all honesty, I cannot for the life of me remember when the last time was that I laughed so long and deeply. It was certainly before the beginning of the current decade.

pfffffhahahahshahhahahha this is the greatest thing ever! ooooo I so hope now that draco and harry will actually get along! they just pulled a prank of weaselly twin proportions on thier first meeting! this bodes so well for the rest of the fic, I love it!

.god. my sides hurt by laughing to much, I can only imagine their faces as 2 11 year Olds confuse the pants off them both

I like the new Draco. He first acted high and mighty because he was raised that way, but he is still a kid influenced by his narrow-minded father. But his thoughts, feeling and admiration for the famous Harry Potter was still that of a child. And he also tried to to help Harry, after Draco was rescued by Harry. An action worth to praise. Sadly Harry's behavior instead was quite conceited again.

I have been trying to get back into my Harry Potter fan fiction addiction and have tried and discarded several highly rated stories, but I think I've found a keeper. I do believe I will enjoy your take on it :)

I - *laughs until the ends of time & can't finish my sentence*
-RA3

That was awesome. I can't stop laughing!

This is my favorite chapter so far, oh my god. The interaction between Malfoy and Harry XDDDD

So, he stole from himself? Eeww.
Damn, he's definitely a Slytherin. Can't be in my house (Ravenclaw all the way)
Ok, loved the way he toyed with Draco and his dad. However, he had no idea what kind of person Draco was before he spoke. Imagine the situation with Neville, and it's not so funny anymore, isn't it?

THIS. THIS IS SO AWESOME. I COULD LITERALLY FEEL THE AWESOMENESS, SO AWESOMELY AWESOME THAT IT COULD KILL MOULDY VAULT WITH A SINGLE GLANCE

The scene at madam Malkin's is hands down one of the funniest things I have ever read.

Oh man, I nearly died laughing there. I am SO showing this to my friend!

hahah funny authors note

Ok, i've been using this name everytime i made a review but it never actually made 'literal' sense up until now. God bless your soul and the souls of others before me who were not able to take in the most glorious thing that is your humor. I am literally dying of laughter now and i have to thank you for it!
I was assuming the good part lies at around chapter 5, as you mentioned in the first chapter, but i was not expecting it to be such a BLAST! i will now respectfully join Madam Malkin and her assistants on the floor and happily suffer the circumstance you put us into.

Oh dear. I had to stop multiple times during this chapter to compose myself. yes I'm still in class, for my defense, it was during a break! and it started again when harry introduced himself to draco...

Congratulations. That ending scene in Madam Malkin's was the first scene in any fan fiction that I've read on this site to make me full-blown, bellyache laugh for 5 minutes straight. That was the most hilarious, stupendous, and overall brilliant pieces of work I have ever seen. Thank you so very much for that masterpiece.

OMG that was *hilarious*!

So I don't usually post reviews especially on old works like these but I absolutely had to this time. This chapter was just so hilarious and the interactions of Harry and Draco were just too funny I just could not stop laughing. Thank you so much for writing this I can't wait to read the rest!

This is the mos beautiful thing I have ever read. Thank you.

I've passed up this story I'm not sure how many times, but I'm sure it's quite a few. I'm really regretting it now because it's flipping hilarious. I was cracking up laughing 3/4 of the way through this chapter(5) so hard I had to stop reading for a moment.

BLEW MY MIND

:)))

Wow, that was hilarious, i have tears in my eyes currently from laughing so hard.

I keeled over laughing at that last scene!

Bwahahahaha! I'm crying and laughing..that bit with the Malfoys was hilarious. And Mcgonagall is brilliant! Her reactions..oh dear! I'm loving this so far!

I CANT BREATHE. literally I have tears in my eyes for laughing so much! I usually review at the end of a fanfiction but I just couldn't help myself! LOVE it!

It's been a long time since a fanfic, hell a novel even, had me giggling out loud. Congratulations. You managed it. And it's realistic. Kudos. Serious kudos.

OMGs please, can Harry and Draco be in the same house, please? *puppy face* :D

Wtf was that!? I'm confused on why harry started flattering Draco like that, and it was really out of character for Draco to saythose things, but it was completely and utterly hilarious! XD

Oh man; I'll have to remember this for the next time I really want to troll someone. I'll probably crack up halfway through though.

ohmygosh MALFOY got into this? i'm laughing so hard right now, my stomach hurtssssssssssss

This is the funniest thing I've read in a long time! I so love this chapter!

OMG...This has to be one of the funniest chapters I've ever read...it's great!

That has to be the most HILARIOUS thing I've ever read in my entire life!

Omg I almost died from laughing so hard!

Omg. I just had to leave a review for this chapter. When Draco said it had been his dream to get into gryffindor...HHAHAHAAHAHAH I think I'm totally going to ace any exam on the fundamental attribution error. This fanfic was a reccomendaion from a youtuber I follow, and seriously I have to say, the synopsis doesn't do it justice. I can't believe I totally missed such a masterpiece in my previous fanfic marathons. Thanks for all the laughter, this is just what I need to dive back into my long forgotten writing spree:)

xD emotes are the only way I can express my entertained state.

Most entertaining chapter I have ever read it made me crack up so gard

I literally cried with laughter in the end. Thank you.

I'm not sure how much on character Harry is behabing, but I supose the uppbringing has to count for sonething, and in any case I'm enjoying it so much! that meet the malfoys was hilarious!

I haven't laughed that hard in a long time omg. Thank you, friend.

OMG this chapter made me laugh so hard my roommate came in to check I wasn't dying.

Harry has such a talent for getting into absurd situations. Intelligence coupled with a lack of planning for unforeseen consequences is going to get him into a lot of trouble, especially if he doesn't stop trying to show how smart he is. Overall an incredible, entertaining chapter!

omg. That interaction was fantastic! Best friends? Definitely on their way there assuming Lucius doesn't skin Draco alive. Thank you for writing! 3 3

I am dying this chapter is so frickin hilarious. Oh my word I am crying right now. That was awesome!

Hahaha I can't stop laughing, my teacher even asked me to show him why I was laughing, now he can't stop.

Oh. I cracked up! I love this chapter! Great job. XD

oh my god that bit with the flattery was HILARIOUS i couldn't breath i was laughing so hard. if the rest of the book is as good as this i will surly enjoy reading it! 10/10 so far

Omg you are a devilish genius. Cant write more now as I'm in a tub reading via kindle

That's an interesting way for Harry and Draco to meet. At the least, young Malfoy has a different first impression of Harry. This version of Harry, to me, fits with Ravenclaw or Gryffindor. There are plenty of stories that have him end up in Slytherin, but I can't think of one that has Draco in Gryffindor. The very thought apparently disturbs Professor McGonagall.

Oh my god, this cracked me up. Your story actually has humor in it and that's impressive seeing as it's hard to find.

Tears we rolling down my cheeks! That is posibly one kd the funniest scenes I have ever read!

That 'X? THE X?' exchange may be the most perfect thing to ever happen to the written word

Simply amazing, the Malkins parts was pure gold.

I don't know how in all my years of reading fanfiction, that I have never heard of this story.
This is fantastic, I'm almost giddy reading it.

Oh. Holy. Crap. That scene about made me die laughing. I could have been one of Malkin's assistants. Oh, it left me sore in places that I didn't know laughing could hurt (oh, my dura mata)!

HAHAHAHAHA! Oh my god! Oh my god! I just hope Draco isn't punished too harshly for that, that was absolutely HILARIOUS.

Hahahahaha! First Harry does it, then Draco emulates him, then Lucius comes in so to save his ass Harry does it again, then McGonagall comes in and Draco in a fit of generous stupidity does it again forgetting that his father is right there. Hahahahaha! And dear ol' composed Madame Malkins completely loses it.

I can imagine it, being a bystander there and seeing everything that went on and all the freaking coincidences and misunderstandings pile up and- OH GOOD KAMI MY TUMMY HAHAHAHA

That scene was the best thing that has happened to me today and now I'm really happy

This.
Is.
Amazing.

My sides.

Actual tears, real actual tears, are falling from my eyes, and my cheeks hurt from laughing.
You, dear Less Wrong, are a worker of exquisite merriment.

This chapter was hilarious, I laughed so much :)

OH MY GOD I LOVE THIS

That was amazing

Awesome chapter. I don't know if the rest of your story is going to be as crazy as this one, but I have to admit I loved this one chapter so much that I'm going to read the next one.

my favorite chapter of fanfic that I have ever read. thank you

Still not entirely sure I like this Harry, but man does he make good comedy

OMG I LOOOOVE this chapter I was on the ground laughin so hard!

Not gonna lie, I would probably have the same reaction as Madam Malkin, simply due to the sheer amount of what the fuckery. That is a compliment.

That was the best dialogue like ever! Draco a Gryff! LOL!

Oh my gosh chapter 5 was fucking hilarious. I'm cackling like a maniac im my loving room, alone, and my dad is in his room and I'm pretty sure he heard me. Fucking hilarious, enough said.

chokes on laughter

Best. Scene. Ever.

Note to self: don't try and read chapter 5 when you are supposed to sleeping.

Cause that is what I am doing right now, and My face was turning red from trying to suppress my laughter.

Oh, oh God, too much laughing. Can't breathe! It hurts!

Dat was brilliant ! the scene with Malfoys xD srsly laughted so hard:D:D:D

you should know you had me giggling over my phone at work and trying desperately not to be noticed. That scene with harry and draco is sure gold

Jesus its so good.

holy shit this chapter actually made me laugh so hard I'm crying

That was the funniest scene I have ever had the pleasure of reading! First story I have Favorited on chapter 5!

This was not only extremely hilarious, it also made me not hate Draco, which I never thought would be possible.

Omg the meeting between Harry and Draco had me in stitches! Contagious dark power! Lol so freaking awesome

Oh my GOD! THAT- THAT- I CANNOT BREATHE! I AM LAUGHING SO HARD! SORRY ABOUT THE CAPS LOCK.

I forgot to wright this yesterday how dare you I like McGonagall

omg. i literally laugh out loud for this chapter

Full bladders and the last seen don't mixs.

This makes the second time I have read your story and this chapter got me rolling on the floor once again. So, thanks once more for such an enjoyable evening.

Im cracking up. I LOVE THIS. You also perfectly captured an 11 year olds attitude. Magonogall is the PERFECT straight man.

So damn shipping Draco x Harry.

I am alot late reading this I'm only at chapter 5 thinking wat the hell im reading but you know what...
I simply have to finish this story...

PERFECTION

Chapter 5 laughed so hard had to take an inhaler. I'm not joking.

Oh goodness...This is just so hilarious I don't know how anyone will sleep if it continues.

This was by far the most HILARIOUS thing I have ever read!

Greatest rewrite of Harry meets Draco scene ever.
"The Draco Malfoy?" Brilliant.

Anyway, I'm reminded of a joke from When Seagulls Cry. Beatrice the witch brags about a contest where each participant wagers their own weight in gold, and if they lose they are turned into a statue of gold. Resident skeptic Butler responds that since gold is many times denser than flesh, the human-statues would thereby weight many times more than the amount they wagered, and violating conservation of mass. Beatrice responds by stating the statues are hollow, then quietly complains to herself how science keeps ruining her magic.

But it's comedy gold.

I know I said I'd sleep, but I can't stop reading. This was my expression XD. I say that in all seriousness.

My god this is hilarious!

the meeting with draco was so hilarious! brilliant!

Oh god, this is AMAZING! I'm so in love with this and I can't stop laughing. I love you, dear author.

You are actually my favourite person right now! I expect to be up VERY late trying to finish this and then some. This is so great! I laughed for quite a few minutes... Loudly too... :D

What the heck, this is one of the funniest texts I read so far

Fucking gold I'm going to die I love you.

I am completely red in the face from so much laughter that I actually have a headache now and require Advil. That is the best scene I have ever read of Harry meeting Drace and I can't wait to read the rest of your story!

OHMYFUCKINGGOD I CAN'T GET OVER THIS CHAPTER I DON'T THINK I HAVE EVER LAUGHED THIS HARD IN MY LIFE YOU DEAR ARE A BLOODY GENIUS AND I AM NOW CRYING HYSTERICALLY LIKE A LUNATIC AND EVERYBODY PROBABLY THINKS IM NUTS BUT OMHYGOD THANK YOU FOR BEING SO WONDERFUL XDDD

I'm dieing from laughter. Sorry, not constructive criticism, but felt like telling it. Good job.

Oh my God, I am just- I am laughing so hard I think I'm gonna die!

The third time reading it, and it still cracks me up

This story is hilarious , I was literally bursting into laugher right here lmao

The funniest thing I've read in a while.

Holy crap. I'm dying. I'm DYING. I did NOT expect his meeting with Draco to go like that.

Absolutely delightful.

THAT WAS GREAT! I really enjoyed this chapter, I love the whole "I've been thinking about trying to be Sorted into..." and the ridiculous flattery. This is an awesome chapter

This is my favorite chapter so far! Draco wants to be sorted into Gryffindor... And his father XD

I have no clue who you are but you are now my hero please please please keep on writing. You're hilarious I started laughing so much my younger sister thought I was crying. I then had to go back and re-read it to make sure I hadn't missed anything.

This made me laugh so hard.
Thank you so much for writing this, it's made my day

Hahahahahahaha omg hahahhaaha I'm dying of laughter hahahahahahahahahaha

This. This is the best thing I have ever read.

O.O

What... wuh... WHAT JUST HAPPENED?

Oh my god. If I thought I liked this fic before, I am going to LOVE it now that I've seen the glory that is this one chapter. That stuff Harry did to Malfoy was HILARIOUS!

Madame Malkin wasn't the only one choking on laughter, though mine is when everyone else is asleep.

Honestly, this chapter had me in tears,and literally clutching my sides.

There are tears in my eyes, this dialogue is /ridiculous./

Oh My God... I don't think I have ever laughed so hard. I'm surprised at how quickly Draco caught on, then kept the joke going when Professor McGonagall came in. I'm still giggling, I can't wait to see what else you have come up with!

Best bloody chapter ev

This chapter reminded me why I first got into fanfiction. The hilarious situational joke happening here is something that simply doesn't work without precedence of an entire canon and fanon. Beautiful. Thanks for this

Hi... Ok, so by now you probably know that i read a few chapters each day, so hopefully you aren't too bothered by my reviews :p
Anyways... That was really amusing, but seriously... Hopefully you haven't made a huge paradox where Draco ends up in Griffindor and Harry in Ravenclaw. I'm not sure the universe can take that...
Keep up the good work :)

hakon2feb.

Ohmahgawd YES! So funny! So much sucking up by Draco... XD

I'm quite literally bent over laughing. That exchange with Draco is priceless!

Making me laugh hysterically seems to be the one favourite thing you do. I mean, you could be a stand-up comedian! :D Spectacular, as always!

I got a stitch in my side from holding in my laughter while working at the library and reading this particular chapter. I can't stop biting back a grin. LOLOLOL

CHAPTER 5 HAD SOME OF THE FUNNIEST DIALOG IVE RVER READ IN MY WHOLE LIFE THANK YOU

I've never even watched or read the Harry Potter series but this already is proving to be immensely enjoyable D

Loving it at the moment. Harry reminds me so much of Hermione... can't wait for them to meet!

I can't stop laughing at Harry getting Draco to do that.

Can you insist with pr. McGonagall?
Taking the money wan't theft. It was deceit. Untrustworthiness.
Malfoy wanted Gryffindor when Harry only mentioned Ravenclaw?
This Harry is more suited to Slytherin.
Confused.

Oh god I laughed so hard I almost threw up, holy crap! That was terrific!

Dude, you should write for American television - wit it up a bit. Honestly, every time we get something interesting, it gets canceled after 'not having found its audience'. Alas.

I have NEVER laughed so hard in my LIFE. Thank you thank you thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou.

That chapter was glorious

Brilliant. Hilarious. Not safe to read in public lest people think you crazy for grinning too widely
XD
your spin of Harry Potter is just epic. And I've only just started. :D

Oh my god, I cried from laughter (for the first time in years) at Draco greeting McGonagall, what a glorious part!

This is amazing! I love the story, and Harry's personality. Keep up the good work!

Okay. I chuckled. I laughed out loud. I wasn't expecting that back and forth between Draco and Harry. Oh god. That was good. Quite good. On ward, omg, lololol.

I'll do more comprehensive review later when I can sit at my computer rather than type on my smartphone, but I did want to say one thing...

O. M. G. I laughed so hard at the Harry/Draconian scene that I seriously snorted soup out of my nose!

OMG! This story is very hilarious. I just started reading and I've been laughing numerously. I'm reading this beside my family and I'm holding my laughter badly. I've been teased by them before about how I laugh by myself when on reading fan fictions.

I really like Harry's sense of humour and logical personality. im definitely going to keep reading this.

Absolutly funny!

I really can't say much except Harry and Draco have a great friendly dyamic going on.

Ha. He broke them.

this was a funny chapter and i am starting to love this story

Harry is right in this example of fundamental attribution error being applied to him, the thing that makes this fanfic particularly difficult to digest as someone who cares about good judgment and decision making is that Harry only ever sees error in others.

Within the first 10 chapters of this story, Harry makes several assumptions about people he meets based solely on behaviors or appearance, and sometimes goes so far as to make a permanent decision not to associate with them based on that sole interaction. He demonstrates that he would also prefer to believe that his assumption was correct rather than be proven otherwise, thus avoiding any evidence to the contrary. He assumes McGonnagal is open-minded and willing to listen to reason, personality traits... internalized reasons for her behaviors. It could be due to external reasons. Maybe she is just caving to his incessant preaching because she knows that she can't defy The Boy Who Lived without some consequences. Does that mean Harry is a rational agent in drawing this conclusion?

Based on the author's version of Harry, it would seem that the definition of reason is whatever the hell I say it is. And if you agree with me, congratulations you're a rational human being and are worthy of my attention. If you disagree, I will verbally assault you with accusations regarding your intelligence, status, and/or any other ad hominem attacks disguised as "observations" and then draw a reductio ad absurdum conclusion that because you won't let me do precisely what I want to do at all times, I will die and it will be your fault. Also, if you disagree you're being irrational.

This is one of the only fanfictions that made me burst out laughing. This was amazing.

I have not laughed that much in a long time! At 11 pm no less! That was absolutely priceless!
Thanks for a good read so far and I am definitely looking forward to the rest of the story

Well, this has got to be the most ridiculous exchange of worthless praise I have ever read!
What a pair of buffoons. I just had to pause to calm down and breathe a few times.
I just had to compliment this comedy that their first meeting turned out to be. xD

I had to read this chapter twice to understand what happened ! First, I am worried about Draco hahaha did they just cover their ass to each other? God, I loved the description of Lucius. It's my favorite description of Lucius ever. Yes Minerva go back and have another drink.

I absolutely love the scene between Harry and Draco. It is so incredibly funny and I can just imagine the horror that McGonagall and Malfoy had.

Ok. I have to say I was pretty skeptical at first. Harry was a bit too pretentious for my taste. However this chapter has begun to change my mind. It was rather entertaining and I'm beginning to enjoy Pretentious Snob Harry. I will continue in the hopes that story also continues to get better.

I laughed so hard at the Draco/Harry/Lucius/Kitty scene I couldn't walk! My sides are hurting. I have a headache!
That is one of the funniest things I have ever read. Seriously!

You are unbelievably talented! This is the first time I've paused to comment because I've been so caught up in your story. I'm currently trying to subdue my laughing so that my roommate doesn't think I've gone crazy!

OMIGOD that was the best interaction between Harry and Draco I've ever read, I don't think I've ever laughed that hard! This smart!Harry is GOLD!

Never have I laughed this hard, as I did reading of Draco and Harry's interaction.. Simply amazing! :D

oh my goodness - my side hurts and I have tears I am laughing so hard.

Omg, i have not laughed so hard in years!

I can't stop laughing! I love this Harry! Totally OOC, but done so, so, so, well. And it's OOC on purpose, which, if its done well, is totally reasonable. It is, after all, a different Harry. This is so hilarious! I love it! Imagine, Draco Malfoy saying he wanted to get into Gryffindor house.

I can't... that was so good... I burst out laughing... Draco and Harry too funny

Well, I am only on Chapter 5. I thought that I wouldn't like this and that Eliezer was spending his intelligence in a rather odd way. But I find myself delighted, amused and informed. Well done!

Chapter 5...what even? Comedy gold!

It was three solid minutes of laughing toward the end of this chapter, and wiping my streaming eyes so I could see well enough to type. That was one of the funniest things I've read in quite a while. ThankYou! Thank you for the chuckles!

THIS WAS THE FUNNIEST CHAPTER IVE EVER READ! I CRACKED UP LAUGHING SO HARD IN PUBLIC EVERYONE TURNED AROUND AND STARED AT ME AND I JUST KEPT GOING FOR 10 MINUTES! THIS IS GOLD!

LOL! No idea what was going on but I loved it

My ribs and stomach hurt from laughing so hard. This kid is brilliant and this chapter is absolutely amazing.

Seriously I couldn't stop laughing I think people thought I was crazy.

This chapter was so god damn funny and completely unexpected. Best meeting between Harry and Draco ever.

I had to join Madam Malkins and her assistants at the end there.

This is hilarious!

Poor Draco ... his return to the manor will not be a gentle one. Remedial lessons in how to be a spoiled racist brat with an ego the size of Europe.

Brilliant! I haven't laughed like this in a very long time. Thank you loads.

Ummm... I'm still laughing hysterically along with wheezing and coughing and snorting...

-his

Madam Malkin and her two assistants are me right now. I'm laughing so hard I think I might cry (the good happy/funny tears).

If Madam Malkin and her assistants understood what Harry was saying to draco, when why couldn't Minerva?

I am actually crying with laughter. When Prof. McGonagall said Harry was destined for Ravenclaw, I really thought she was wrong- he negotiates for himself and gets what he wants, and seems to be very independent. Though he gets a great deal of knowledge and possibly wisdom from all the reading he does, I don't see him going anywhere but Slytherin.

I thought Harry's "...they want to shake hands with a bad explanation." was going to be the best quote until McGonagll's "...more terrible than death."

The whole scene in Madame Malkins was beyond priceless! "...please cast a Confundus charm on the entire universe!"
How do you keep coming up with this so awesomecool stuff?

You sir *breaks out into wheezes* have now topped all other of my hysterical laughing fits. This just made me almost fall out of my chair, cry tears of humor, and laugh so oddly my cat looked at me as if wondering if I had finally gone mad. *breaks out into laughter again* The last story to do this was 'Don't Judge A Fanfiction By Its Summary' for the Bleach (an anime/manga) fandom. This is now in my favorites just for this last scene, and it's only chapter 5! Hehehe.

I think it's been far too long since the last time I've looked into this story. I laughed so hard, I started crying. Harry, who makes sense, is most frightening to witches and wizards who can't be bothered to think. This is glorious.

I look forward to reading further.

Sincerely,
Miriam

This chapter(5) made me laugh.

"Right now she was holding out a Moke Super Pouch QX31, whose selling point was that it had a Widening Lip as well as an Undetectable Extension Charm"

I find it very interesting that the Wizarding world has the same sort of capitalist product innovation as the (Western) Muggle world. I would expect the Wizarding world to be more hidebound and slow-moving, as it seems to be in every other way. This is an inconsistency in canon that I would expect to be addressed here, especially as the story has already shown itself to be economically aware.

I'd be terrified to try that moleskin bag trick; what if that turned out to be only the display model? On the other hand, I wonder what sort of crazy stuff would be hidden in a display-model moleskin bag.

"The door formed a hand and waved goodbye to them as they left, extruding its arm in a way that made Harry feel a bit queasy.
And then, unfortunately...

"Are you really Harry Potter?" whispered the old man, one huge tear sliding down his cheek. "You wouldn't lie about that, would you? Only I'd heard rumours that you didn't really survive the Killing Curse and that's why no one ever heard from you again.""

This is an awkward and confusing transition, another example of amateurishness. What you're trying to do here can work, but after the first sentence, a description of what happened should appear. Something like, ""Are you really Harry Potter?" whispered the old man, one huge tear sliding down his cheek. Harry and Professor McGonnagal had been proceeding to their next destination when a small wizard in green silk robes had stopped them after staring at Harry's forehead for a moment. It seemed that Professor McGonagall's disguise spell was less than perfectly effective against more experienced magical practitioners."

That's not perfect, but it gives the idea.

The interaction between Harry and Draco confused me when I first read it. Again, I think some more detail is in order, though what you're doing here is very cool. In particular, I don't see why Harry is upset when Draco pulls the same ironic stunt on him that Harry did to Draco. It seems to me that he was just playing along. I love the interaction, it's just not fully clear what's going on.

So I think that most of my criticism of this story boils down to this: *more detail.* More description, at almost every turn, would vastly improve the story. Yes, doing it well would involve doubling the length of an already very long book, but that's what it would take to turn it into something of professional-level quality.

""Professor McGonagall!" cried Draco. "Is it really you? I've heard so much about you from my father, I've been thinking of trying to get Sorted into Gryffindor so I can -""

Why did he do that? It feels wrong, out of place. How would he dare defy his father like that? I don't get it. I understand why he might think he should, but not how he would actually do it.

I may have fallen off my chair and nearly choked due to laughing while reading this.

I am in my daughters' bedroom, reading as they are sleeping- and I hace teaes rolling down my face from suppressed laughter. This is truly an amazing story.

Interesting

I don't know why I've never heard of this story before but I'm in love with it.

Jesus Christ Harry is such a little shit in this chapter I can't breathe from laughing and it's like 3am so I have to cackle into my duvet so I don't wake anyone

Alright. You were totaly correct. I was kind of cool on this story (although I do greatly appreciate the 'trick' you are pulling off here.) but Harry was coming off almost Mary Sueish in his "too clever by half" actions with regards to how screwed up the Wizarding World is with regards to it's economics, and general naivete.

This chapter totally brought a wide smile to my face...this is the moment where this stopped being a polite screed on rationality, and an interesting and intriguing AU story told through a Rationalist lens.

But man...I'm not sure I'm going to get through 650K. Not anytime soon! *heh*

Mwahahahaha ! Oh my god you did so well !

After the latest Chapter I've had this thought. in Failure, Pt 1: "Okay, no matter how this all shakes out, if we're both still alive on Monday I want us to meet up at Madam Malkins Robes for all Occasions.

Good sir, your name!

Lord Voldemort.

It IS you! Lord Voldemort! It's such an honor to meet you!
... ...
What? Why are your Parents Muggles? Avada...

Actually, two of my parents are dead ...

Who are you?

Harry Potter.

THE HARRY POTTER...

...

I am so unutterably delighted to meet you.