|Reviews for Trances and Beginnings|
| Dolly.Reader chapter 1 . 10/12/2013
Oh! I enjoyed reading this. It's always nice to find something to read from a different perspective.
Thank you for keeping it up for new readers to find.
| k1942 chapter 1 . 5/14/2013
Very different than many others I've read, but very intriguing!
| reve2weaver chapter 1 . 5/22/2012
This sparse one-shot is such a refreshing and evocative point of view of Edward’s transformation. Particularly, because Esme is often portrayed as a ‘pathetic’ character, the word used in the modern and weak sense, rather than the Greek play’s interpretation of tragic. I found this story, despite its briefness, had such a wielding grasp on her bewilderment on dealing with Edward, because Esme's character was so rich. She's made unforgettable, because of the mirror, darkly.
I love that Esme must work through her own doubts, and it's this vulnerability that opens her up as a character; not because she's Carlisle's mate, or her 'ability to love', but because this delves into something deeper and darker. A taboo topic, what brought Esme into their lives is too oft forgotten as they see only her sweet light after a long night. I love that her psyche was more daringly exposed because it made her far more human. What does her suicide say about Esme, and how does it affect her now?
This sparse writing was perfect for capturing what is most friable and hardest to speak aloud, even more as she's supposed to be the 'good' mother, but usually exactly what those like Edward, who are hurting, and think they must suffer in silence. Such deft and smart characterizations.
TS Elliot’s poem ‘Portrait of a Lady’, which I was unfamiliar with at the time , and so it would seem was Esme:
"When prodded about this moving of instruments, he muttered something lowly and under his breath, 'So intimate, this Chopin, that I think his soul should be resurrected only among friends.'
Esme blinked, confused by his spontaneous recitation of a piece she did not recognize."
I love that we think he is speaking about the music, but as Jasper explains later, it is TS Elliot's poem. The poem's speaker, mocks the lady for her sensibilities, while privately admiring and lamenting his own inability to speak thus. It's typically TS Elliot being cryptic, and fits Edward's own shut away emotions, but disparately wanting to be able to unburden himself.
Both Esme and I go: OH! Ooooohhhhh!
How I love a flawed then enlightened POV.
Things become muddier before they are clearer for each of them. Just like the deciphering of Elliot's poetry, or the wildings of love, it is a journey of a thousand steps, but this holds just the right amount of words.
I love how this has just the right amount of poetics. Just a smattering here and there of intricate phrases that floods and yet eludes to a more powerful and telling character trait. On Edward:
"Boys frowned in his direction, shooting him glances and throwing murderous thoughts. Their fantasies made him smirk at his paper and tap the perfect eraser on the table."
God I love everything about what this line conveys and does not outright say. Edward's smirking as he mulls over each fantasy is both bitter and arrogant. We glimpse Edward relishing his own self-loathing in theirs, and yet he's hopeless. He also knows no one will mete out this just punishment, so he wallows in their hate, punishing himself for his own bloodthirsty murders, but like his perfect eraser, he and his memory remains just as untouched. Wow, just wow. Dark and so, so enlightening.
The prodigal son’s second return from his ‘cliff’ and how he shared that with Esme now was an epiphany that I never saw coming, yet all the pathway rocks were all neatly laid just so, how could I not? I had never noticed this parallel before in the two characters, and it was a toothy reveal. Putting Edward as the second-time prodigal son and her ‘ bone-crushing’ hug at a 'second' gate was such good writing.
The repeat of this gate scene, from the opening to his return to show Esme not only saw the difference, but that she knew he did too. … just... wow. No one could feel as forgiven from Edward’s dark edges of his self-inflicted chaos except from Esme, who had been there.
This was one of the few stories that have paid such honor to our ever elusive Esme. The story arch allows her the grace to stumble, and tremble as a failed mother, but without simpering, or an apologist’s whinging and begging forgiveness. She becomes more, not less because of her mistakes, and the insight it gives her. Thank you for finding a way to bring her to such heights after her weighted trials of her own deep gorge. Brilliant.
| TwilightsMyPassion chapter 1 . 4/15/2012
I loved this! Each word was golden.
| InkHeart17 chapter 1 . 1/25/2012
Wow. Absolutely beautiful! Your prose is moving. Loved the bit about Edward being saved from drowning only to throw himself overboard again.
| IRunWithWerewolves chapter 1 . 12/17/2011
Simply fantastic. A one-shot complete and whole and beautiful in itself, and that is very hard to find.
| edward lover chapter 1 . 10/27/2011
really a very beautiful piece as seen from esme's pov..describes edward truly to the piece has a certain mystical charm to it.
| BlueRyuu chapter 1 . 2/4/2011
thats so cute 3 ; ;
| TallulahBelle chapter 1 . 1/8/2011
Lovely, absolutely lovely.
I really enjoyed seeing the Cullen family and relationships through Esme's eyes. Who else but the heart of their group could be so unconditional in love and see things, both good and bad, to tell the story.
| WhatsMyNomDePlume chapter 1 . 1/8/2011
this was SO lovely, it made me ache and smile at the same time. I love the recurring poem throughout, the depth you added to Esme and Edward, even Bella, through this. I love that you followed it through all four books and most of all, i love that very last line.
| PoppyMay chapter 1 . 12/8/2010
Okay, Wow. That was amazing!
I loved this! You nailed it. Perfect!
Esme is my Favorite!
Thank you so much for writing!
| Raewright chapter 1 . 9/27/2010
| Citizen of Volterra chapter 1 . 9/18/2010
There's just something about a good Esme point of view (or Esme followed) story!
| miaokuancha chapter 1 . 8/6/2010
For 18 you write amazingly mature stories. By mature, I mean emotional nuance. There had been a whole long thread on ADF recently about T-rated (low-smut/no-smut) fics being 'high school-ish' and 'immature'. I hardly knew what to say. Drama, trauma, and moaning/dripping kama-sutra how-to is not the mark of maturity in my book. Sensitive, nuanced, respectful treatment of characters and their growth through a life lived is. And that is what you have written. Well done!
| Light-OFTHE-World-18 chapter 1 . 7/14/2010
Aww... Wow amazing!