Reviews for Ancient enlightenment
Ginebra chapter 1 . 4/3/2010
I really like this story so far, so I hope you update soon
tammin chapter 1 . 4/2/2010
I have seen this done with Naruto, however this is the first time I have this tried with Harry. I wish you good luck. I look forward to reading future chapters.
fluffybunny too chapter 1 . 4/2/2010
I really like it so far. I won't go into the grammer and other errors that seems to be covered well enough by the other reviewers (besides that would be the pot calling the kettle black,in other words I am probably just as bad if not worse).

I hope you plan to have him share his discovery, starting with the rest of the trio. Ron would certainly benifit greatly from this maybe feel better about himself and more secure in the friendship. Hermione would be giddy with delight over the learning, if she did't feel it was cheating somehow. Then cautiously spread out maybe to those who later went to the DOM with him and certainly with the twins.

I agree that Dumbledor shouldn't be told but it is your story and I have probably given much more advice than wanted or needed. But I will continue on to one more thing, I don't think Harry would trust many adults at all at this point. OK I'll stop now, please Keep going.
Serious.Effort chapter 1 . 4/2/2010
I think it has potential, definitely! However, there were some problems. Most distracting was the use of the symbol & instead of "and", I know it means the same thing, but that's just darn lazy! The others have been pointed out in other reviews.

The writing itself shows talent and it's a good idea. Sounds like it'll be fun and I look forward to reading more. :)
nwspor chapter 1 . 4/2/2010
HAHAHAHAHAHAAH LOL
Jfitzgerald chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
Please update again soon. thanks.
SilverFoxQueen chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
Uh oh, what is going to happen with a smart Harry?
rio45 chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
Good start mate I like this story. You have a couple of grammar errors But they look like slip up's so it's all good looking forward to more.
LuckyFelix chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
Interesting start.

There are some spelling and grammar issues which other reviewers have addressed. Nothing a good beta couldn't sort out though. It's readable, which is more than can be said for a lot of the fics on this site.

I'm looking forward to where you take this from here.
Seimika chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
interesting.. alil fast paced at the end and alil convient but its good so far,spelling is good,writin could be improved a bit but it shows some talent
Ace Trainer Jessie chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
interging. i'd like to read more. lol. smart Harry taking on the Dursleys anyway you spin it. always fun.
VM chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
Not a bad story, I'm interested in whether you plan on having him go to the stargate reality later on. I guess that could be a sequel if you ever plan on going that far. Also the FERU idea is one I haven't seen before, so kudos for the originality.

There are a few grammar and spelling mistakes, some are typos some aren't. e.g.: "he had been to come her without alerting anyone." This sentence, even if you hadn't forgotten the word 'able', wouldn't have been grammatically correct. You're switching your point of view by saying he was 'able to come here without..'. What you want to say is something like: "..he had been able to get to Myrtle's bathroom without alerting anyone." Well you get the idea.

Also, (this probably stuck out because it's the last sentence of the chapter) you used 'of' instead 'or'. You also misspelled FERU lol, even though it's your acronym. Unless you meant to say FERN, in which case it's my mistake and you can ignore this last part.

It's the little things that matter, and they can turn a good story into an annoying one to read if they're constantly incorrect so just watch out for that.

Looking forward to the next segment,

VM
zippythewondermonkey chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
LOOKS LIKE A GREAT BEGGINING CANT WAIT FOR MORE
Olaf74 chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
*removes his Jaw from the floor*

BLOODY HELL!

You are full of surprises! In the positive turn i mean.

Please continue the story very very soon.
Kelvrin chapter 1 . 4/1/2010
there are some errors and anoyances in this chapter.

1. Use of the "&" character instead of "and" is annoying and harms the flow of the story.

2. Using 3rd instead of Third.

3. In some sentences you use "of" instead of "or".

So far this is looking to be a good story. I await your next chapter, without the &s...lol
426 | « Prev Page 1 .. 17 24 25 26 27 28 .. Last Next »