|Reviews for In the Shadow of Ursa Major|
| bugsmama07 chapter 20 . 7/19/2010
i think bella's doing quite fine by herself. of course, when you move away from 'home', you're going to miss your family and your life that you had but now she's being herself and fulling dreams she always wanted to pursue. i'm glad she found angela, someone she could be friends with. angela is always the perfect best friend. :)
and jasper, i'm happy that he's out doing what he does best. three words that come to mind with jasper: can't be tamed. (Yeah, i know it's kinda miley cyrus but still. lol)
and with angela pushing bella to meet ben was a good idea. ben is actually another friend for bella. she can't be alone without anybody for the rest of her life.
and edward, showing up because of mike and jessica. that is so...awesome. i can't wait to read about edward reaction to bella being in helena.
i loved this chapter. we've seen both bella and edward grow into the people they wanted to be so now maybe fate/life will bring them back to each other. (wink wink)
| lebrute chapter 19 . 7/12/2010
helena? really? interesting she's bound to run into edward.
| bugsmama07 chapter 19 . 7/12/2010
i can't say that i'm exactly thrilled that bella kept sleeping with jasper, even if it was just for the sense of feeling. it just seemed...wrong, on some level, if that makes sense to you. its like she knew all along that she shouldn't really have been doing what they were doing. its seemed to me that jasper felt he owed something to bella out of guilt, and you never try and form a relationship out of guilt; it never works.
i can understand bella's deep connection to carlisle. her feeling of curiosity, that he may not be truly dead. even though edward brought the heart back and jasper described his death to her. she still felt that connection they shared and that connection wasn't severed like she thought it would be. its like she's dreaming about his life, as he's living it now. and i think some of the dreams stem back to the discussions we've had about them meeting again but being different people on a different path in life and i think bella knows that, deep down, if they return to each other, they may not be the same as they were.
as far as her decision to go to helena, she, as well as edward, needed to find their place in the world since the death of carlisle changed all their lives. they were just surviving, wallowing in their guilt and lost love, not truly living life to the fullest. bella needs to find her passion for life and all the things she loved, including her teaching. i know she never meant to hurt jasper but so this decision brings about the end to their unfulfilled relationship, and i think their both happier in the long run for that end of things between them.
jasper is a wild and free spirit, and sticking around the ranch like he had be doing was tsifling his spirit. he needs the open spaces and the chase he's been missing.
now that everyone's gone their own way, i wonder what would bring them all back together...hopefully nothing that could rip them apart, once again.
i loved this chapter. i guess, because it brought everyone some kind of closure and showed them the path to their future they wanted, not what was given to them. it's giving them back their passion. great job.
| sleepyvalentina chapter 19 . 7/12/2010
I'm excited for what the city brings.
| sleepyvalentina chapter 18 . 7/5/2010
I know it's meant to be hopeful, but it still makes me so sad. Drinking more.
| bugsmama07 chapter 18 . 7/5/2010
I'm that Charlie and edward have come to an understand of sorts about edward's decision to leave the ranch. charlie knows that edward was right, keeping him there would ultimately kill him. he needs to be his own person and find his own and charlie realizes edward's way is not the ranch's way. their relationship seemed strained at best before this talk and now i hope their relatioship can gain some normalcy between the father and son.
i had a feeling that edward would meet a woman and think that he screwed around with them that he would appear more attractive to bella. but i'm so glad that edward stayed true to himself and denied kate and jessice. at least, if he's gonna be with a woman,edward wants feelings and emotions, not just physical pleasure. (it never dawned on me that ed was a virgin. lol).
with his accomplishments of his store, his friends, living on his own, he's finding out what he wants from life. he does have hope for the future and he's almost happy. i think he's very content and hopeful, but he's on the verge of true happiness but we both know that something is still missing from his life. his loss of bella has left a void for him, that either he'll get over or bella will get her shit together. its been what, 8 months or so since he left the ranch from beginning to end of this chapter?
i've got all kinds of interactions of bella and jasper running through my head but the most prominent one is she's ashamed. that she jumped into something she was ready for and now she's drove away that constant thing in her life. i wanna see how she's been dealing. did having sex with jasper and edward leaving make bella open her eyes and now she's back to how she used to be or is she just fallen deeper into a depression past the point of no return?
and jasper. how does he feel that he shows up, screws around with bella, pissing off his brother and his abrupt departure? does he feel guilty? or victorious that he knows he has no one to fight for bella's attention? rather it be friendship or a companion?
wonderful chapter. i was worried about our boy moving off by himself but he seems to be doing just fine. now, if i just find my way to his apartment, he wouldn't be lonely anymore... *wink*
| jane1292 chapter 18 . 7/5/2010
is bella gonna end up with jasper, the suspense is killing me!
| lebrute chapter 17 . 6/29/2010
just stumbled upon this fic and read it all in one sitting. instantly addictive. can't wait to se what edwards up to.
| sleepyvalentina chapter 17 . 6/28/2010
So sad and lovely.
| bugsmama07 chapter 17 . 6/28/2010
i never figured that carlisle would get a 'lady friend'. ;) bowchickawowwow. love it!
now, for the serious business. i understand carlisle's frustrations. he knows he's married, he's in love with his wife from the journal, but he does't know. i'm ecstatic that he made the decision to live in the present. heidi seems like a lovely woman for him. they share some of the same passions: healing the wounded. :)
but as far as heidi goes, im sure she's going to be heart broken IF carlisle returns home. but how would he do that? he has no knowledge of a life other than what he lives now. i highly doubt the military (by today's standards) would ship a returning soldier home without his memory. how would he function in society? he knows noone. not even his own flesh and blood, let alone his wife. what would he be going home to? a house with stangers in it? if he never regained his memory, where would he find his place in the world? how could he be happy and content with life if he was surrounded by confussion and utter loss? loss of his true self, who he was to his father, his brothers, his wife?
and the family. i'm sure they would need to be told that if he ws found, that he had no recollection of his life, his memories. it would truly be as if he died. his former self is nothing but a ghost to them.
so what does he do? does he try and search for an old life that he might not fit into anymore? try and forge back into a marrige with someone he doens't know? try and be a son to the father that raised him? or form his brother bonds with men has doesn't remember?
or does he try and start a new life with what he knows about himself now? form new memories with people he knows and a woman he cares about? she might not be bella now, but will he ever get his bella back?
loved the look into carlisle's life. he's a very passionate person and that makes his view awesome to read. loved it!
| bugsmama07 chapter 16 . 6/21/2010
stand up and scream for him to stay if she needs him that much, if he's such a constant in her life! that girl has lost her damn mind!
jasper...man, oh man. he just, he's trying to be there for bella anyway he can, but is being there for her a physical release all that great? things are going to get so confused between them. seeking comfort through sex never turns out the right way, no matter the intentions behind it.
i knew edward was going to leave, i knew that, from the moment he knew they slept together, but reading him tell bella he's leaving broke MY heart. i cried, i cried so hard.
jasper not doing the honorable thing with bella royally pissed edward off. he just wants to be what she needs and she just casually threw him away, with no real regard to his feeings. she never really thought how much he meant to her, even if she doesn't love him in return. but she'll see. when he leaves off for helena and finds someone for him to marry, for him to at least attempt to be happy, she'll realize the dire mistake she made. (i'm just letting her know... :)}
but at least now, jasper has some idea as to how carlisle felt about going to war. bella pointed out to him that it was his choice to go because he needed to be there, edward only planted the thought in his mind. of course there's going to be animosity over who's to blame for carlisle's death, but that's normal. somebody needs to blame someone to feel his death was rectified. when in reality, there's no one TO blame. it's all circumstances and beliefs and fate. (well,i believe in fate.)
as far as edward never feeling apart of the family or the ranch, i've always felt for him to be the outsider. not much so bella, seeing as she married into the family, but he's had different views on things and he doesn't feel that he fits well into the life on the ranch anymore. him leaving will hopfully bring him some peace to the shit storm that his life has been for a year now.
i'm wondering if we could have some interaction between bella charlie. is he blaming her the destruction of his family? one son's death, sex with another, and the disappearance of the final third? the life he had with his sons is no more, because one son fell in love with one woman and brought her home. i'm sure he's not blaming her, but do us readers know that? how does he feel about these turns of events?
this chapter was one of the hardest to read and review. so many emotions from everyone flying around. hurt, anger, resentment, rage, hollowness. i know jazz and bella are passionate people, but they let their emotions rule themselves and caused a world of hurt to the one person that cares for them both so much. edward feels rejected and unloved, and he needs to find his own way. he's doing the right thing by leaving. it just sucks to read about him doing it. (lol)
great, great chapter! although, i was looking for some swinging fists. :) maybe next time
| sleepyvalentina chapter 15 . 6/15/2010
I knew this would happen, but I don't have to like it.
I admit in the beginning I questioned you casting, but morality-driven indignation is so Edward. I just hope that eventually the feelings she develops for him are real. Then I'll sob even more than I did when he was named Alfred.
| MonaRider chapter 15 . 6/14/2010
Poor guy, Poor everyone it would seem. :( I feel so sad for everyone, but then again. She did bed him, yes out of grief but it was still a choice.
| bugsmama07 chapter 15 . 6/14/2010
OMFG! how did i not see that she would bed JASPER! that came straight out of left field! my mouth hung open the rest of the chapter!
now, let see... i'm not really sure what to make of them, together like that. i guess, it was a moment of passion and comfort for them. but for it to happen more than once when they both realized that it was a mistake and there will be all kinds of consequences for them to deal with, they did it a second time. and i'm not sure why bella stiffled carlisle's name. was it to save jasper from having his feelings hurt? or out of respect? either way, i'm not sure if i'm proud of her for not deflating his ego or hurting his feelings or just being respectful or pissed at her because that was her husband and she just made the biggest mistake in my eyes. looking for a moment of feeling loved versus crushing the feelings of a man that has fallen in love with you and now, she's probably ruptured the very small and very breakable bond that was left between jasper and edward. just, gosh i hope she doesn't get pregnant. that would be like pouring salt on the wound. i can only imagine how edwrad feels right now. having the woman of his dreams in bed with his brother, the one that she wasn't married to. he beat he leaves. i beat he just, takes off and leaves them to wallow in their misery, together but alone.
loved this chapter. i was totally taken by surprise! fabulous!
| thefuturealice chapter 1 . 6/8/2010
oh my god. i love your story so far. you've made me fall in love with the idea of carlisle and bella, however, i can see this taking a turn for the worse where carlisle somehow runs into esme and edward and bella unwittingly move on because they
believe carlisle to be dead. PLEASE don't be one of those authors that makes everyone fall in love with one idea only to wrench it away gahh this is so frustrating. you're a good writer though.