|Reviews for That Strange Request|
| Guest chapter 5 . 7/25/2014
I hope you write more, these two are simply beautiful together and I believe you're capturing it quite nicely :) thank you for the time and effort put into this, even if it really isn't that much, it's still nice :)
| Irako of the Desert chapter 5 . 11/11/2013
This chapter also suffers a little bit from purple prose. Eyes are eyes, not orbs. Orbs are soulless, whereas eyes are windows to the soul.
I liked the ending, especially the bit about how Vincent finds a little bit of happiness in being able to simply touch another person without any violence. The way you phrased it created a beautiful sense of intimacy and vulnerability. You also did a much better job of sticking to one person's POV and had much better transitions when you switched. I also liked how you explored Vincent's love for Re-L. It was touching and believable.
| Irako of the Desert chapter 4 . 11/11/2013
You did a better job with this chapter of capturing Re-L's arrogance and reminding the reader that Vincent is actually a Proxy. His worry over Re-L getting sick again and panicking was very in-character.
I feel like this issue over how Re-L doesn't view infected Autoreivs with respect and Vincent does is much more serious than you hinted at here. Re-L is perceptive of Vincent's reactions because she thinks he somehow holds the answers she's looking for and is constantly watching him. She would pick up immediately that he doesn't like her calling Pino a defect, though she wouldn't necessarily stop because he didn't like it. When you had her call Pino his pet, it seemed like she was deliberately antagonizing him. That is something she might do in the name of learning more about Vincent, and would have been a much more interesting read by having it escalate more than it did here.
You're still jumping from POV to POV, though.
| Irako of the Desert chapter 3 . 11/11/2013
I think this chapter suffers too much from purple prose. You probably didn't have to have this chapter, either. It didn't have much in the way of relationship-building or character development.
| Irako of the Desert chapter 2 . 11/11/2013
"Couraging up mustard," omigosh, that is so cute! That sounds exactly like something Pino would say! You did a wonderful job of capturing her character in this chapter. I also like how you portrayed her relationship to Vincent.
You still need to work on picking a POV and sticking to it, though.
| Irako of the Desert chapter 1 . 11/11/2013
I like the idea for this story, but think the execution could have been better. You hopped from Vincent's POV to Re-L's POV way too much. It would be better if you picked one or the other.
I do like how you have Re-L have a hang-up about people invading her personal bubble and then explore that. It sounds like something she would do and then have Vincent get all confused over. It also add extra depth to that one scene where he pins her down in the Rabbit.
| kimiko chapter 5 . 10/21/2012
cute :) really love it
| Blonde-Existentialist chapter 3 . 7/27/2010
I must say, all three of em are quite cute, sweet, and well written little drabble bits. Theres a few grammatical errors here and there, but nothing too terrible, and its quite a pleasent read nonetheless. I look forward to more.
| Kognisjon chapter 3 . 7/4/2010
Wow, its so good...
And Pino is so funny! Especially her phrase "Are you guys going to be like a mama and papa now?" xD
I am looking forward to read the continuation _
| BigHair chapter 3 . 6/16/2010
i really like this :D you doing a really good job with keeping them in character and the story in general :) especially pino, she's as adorable as ever! XD i cant wait to read more! plz update!