Reviews for First & Ten
bouncy 72 chapter 6 . 7/28/2010
*giggle* Ok like u know I don't have the faintst idea about football, but the thought of Shaggy running around with an ironman mask on... *starts giggling uncontrolablly again*

I loved Alices football terms & her encouragement about Edward being good in bed, hehehe.

I laughed at Bella standing out side the door & not being able to go in, oh & at the reappearence of the teenage boy ;)

"Edward in his Trojan uniform," mmm Edward in a Trojan *shakes head to clear it.*

*squeals in excitement* I LOVE the kiss.

Shit... "I'm not sleeping with him" *explodes into laughter* oh Bella, Bella, Bella.

"He likes me, he really likes me. Which just goes to show that Edward Cullen is not that perfect after all, since his taste is quite flawed" *giggles & gives a happy content sigh* I always feel so good reading your stuff, like a happy buzz.

That was a perfect 1st date for them. Thanks hon!
bouncy 72 chapter 5 . 7/28/2010
Mmm Edward working out...yum. I loved Emmett, he was so funny. "Most Beautiful" & "Body Beautiful" *grin*.

I liked Jaspers name "Shaggy"

Loved how Em & Rose met & how he woo'ed her.

I can not believe he tasered Jasper & Edward *giggle* I hope they get him back well & truely.

That was a great ch. love the humour :)
babyo chapter 6 . 7/27/2010
mountainlion718 chapter 6 . 7/27/2010
nice 1st date, a little awkward, but understandable :) can't wait for Tues!
SabLuvsLogan chapter 6 . 7/26/2010
Great update, I am soo addicted to your writing. Can't wait for the next update :D
StormLondon chapter 6 . 7/25/2010
Great chapter! I'm looking forward to the next update.
youngandmature chapter 6 . 7/24/2010
I reined it in. Liked this ch. and the last :)


-Last ch; did J see more than just a bra and undie clad B when he walked in on her pulling off her shirt?

That's it and its not even meant in a BxJ question way, I'm just wondering how much more of B he's seen than E. Poor E :(
youngandmature chapter 4 . 7/23/2010
Ok, straight to questions and comments this time. But first I have to warn you that I'm beginning to fester some Bella-hate now, with the more I get to know her. So if I come across as harsh it's not meant to be, I really do love the story. Just frustrated with B atm.

Q's and C's:

-At the start when B didn't know where she was and was trying to figure it out and was wondering what she had done last night, did it cross her mind that she'd had a random hook up?

-I think the reason I'm starting to hate on Bella is because she seems very kosher about Edward when he was going crazy over her and the fact she had the nerve to get all pissy and other crap. Then she gets defensive about shit, eg. E looking at her in Jas' clothes and what she assumed as him being assumptions (presumably her hooking up with Jazz) and her being pissy and then using that as an excuse to not needing to apologize for making assumptions about Sandy.. he can't be blamed for thinking that but she can be, E was clearly unhappy with Sandy and if B got her head out of her arse for a second she would have realized it. And her getting resentful for being woken and shit. She had absolutely no right. And her self pity (which she didn't deserve, E should have been away for longer to make her suffer. She deserves it. The voice recorder was a bitch move) And if E was so important, why didn't she try calling him via Jasper as soon as she says to Alice she messed up previous chappie while she starts getting drunk at the club?

-When B said James swept her off her feet, was she in love with him or was it just a first crush type of thing and being swept up by the idea of love more so? But then she wonders about how E could soon easily sweep her off her feet, so did she seriously fall for James then? If not then why was she so damaged by James? Did she lose her virginity to him, her first kiss etc.? And if E is her soulmate- like I assume he is in your story- how come meeting him and getting to know him didn't immediately sweep her up? ('Just like Edward Cullen could with very little effort. It scared the shit out of me.') Did she really think those months with James were perfect or did she want it to be perfect in that schoolgirl crush kinda way? Ugh. So confused.

-B said she's not sure whether or not she would have done the story had he left with Sandy but then she tells him she never would, is she lying? Why did B tell E she was good in bed? Why is that necessary? Will most of this story be leading up to the first ch. or will we hit that stage and see their relationship progress for most of the story? I forget in the first chap, how long had they been together? Two months?

-Beside the incentive of effing up AJ, would B have apologized to Edward anyway? As though I presumed the opposite it did seem like her motive was to not cause a rift between A and J.

-Is there any underlying meaning to B getting pissed at E's comments and laugh at an A/J/B threesome or was she simply annoyed as she thought E was saying she wasn't attractive or something?

-It bothered me that as soon as E and B kinda got together she was looking at Jasper. Was she in lust with Jas? If she's all head over heels for E how come she can look at another man like that and then later be annoyed that he'd covered up? There is a huge difference between attractive good looking (she wasn't just like, 'oh yeah he's nice looking but not my type') and being attracted wanting someone, could be attracted to more than just physical looks. So which is it B feels for Jasper? I feel bad as E is seemingly celibate since meeting Edward, while in the meantime, B is suspiciously seeming to be panting after the bestie of the guy she's supposed to be with..


'"Of course I was!" Jasper followed her out of the room, bare-chested and wearing some gray sweat pants. Dear Lord. My eyes were on hot guy overload this morning.'


'Jasper returned wearing a shirt this time, which was really too bad. Though, it got me wondering what exactly Edward would look like shirtless.'

It disappointed me with James and Jasper, from the conclusions I've drawn, as she seemed to only have eyes for Edward and now I feel their relationship and love is less true. I mean, is B jealous of A and J at all cause she wants Jazz for herself? Does she fantasize over Jazz? And did Jas really see her naked? Is B pleased by the revelation at all?

-When she says to E about having a hot threesome and she says to herself ['"Having a hot threesome with him and Alice, of course. What do you think?" That's good, Bella. Be a bitch again. Didn't you vow last night to apologize for jumping to conclusions? Well yes, I had, but he probably jumped to one just now when he saw me in Jasper's clothes looking like death warmed over.'] is that sarcasm?

-What does B mean exactly when she says the effect E has on her is unprecedented? And does B still think E is promiscuous as in this chap she refers to him worrying about her writing a story on his player ways and about his experience...?

-If her reunion with E had've been a dream would B have ever wanted to wake up? Or are her feelings that strong that she'd be content to sleep forever if it meant being with him? How come she wasn't more sad when she thought she would never see him again? And that she'd stuffed things up?

I'm afraid all the stuff to do with James and Jasper will now have me questioning B's devotion the whole story, probably. I apologize in advance. I'll drive you nots. Please just keep in mind its my OCD tendencies and not anything to do with you :)
youngandmature chapter 3 . 7/23/2010
Ok, so it was James. Was B unwilling to talk more once A said not all guys were like James cause she doesn't want to talk about him or is she upset about Edward and won't talk about that?

Exactly what was James to her? Did he break her heart? She says she was stupid and an idiot and she'd learnt that after James?

Did E like Tanya or Lauren much? As Jas said last ch. that Tanya did a number on him, or is he referring to the scratches not the emotional part?

'Good idea, Bella. Then your heart really would stop and you would die. It would totally be worth it, though. Look at those lips.'

With the above quote, B is joking yeah? But even if she is joking, I'm curious, is she that into Edward already that she'd actually like to kiss him than die rather than never experiencing it? Are her feelings that intense?
youngandmature chapter 2 . 7/23/2010
Continuing to be witty, sweet and an overall enjoyable read.


-If there was no E or A in the picture would B be attracted to Jasper in a romantic sense?

-When A imitated B and said 'You're perfectly content being alone and you're completely over that jerk.', whose the jerk, did he do a number on her, is that why she doesn't date? All the deets. ETC.
hippie starr chapter 6 . 7/21/2010
"Hands off my man! Rip his head off, Jazzy!" ~*~*~*~*~* HEhehehe I adore Alice!


He could wear something like Iron Man wears." I got a mental image of Alice handing Jasper some giant metal helmet with tiny slits for him to see out of and laughed so hard I nearly fell off the couch.~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ I could totally see Alice making that and I can even see Jasper modeling it for her. Emmett would looooove that!


Ok, I'm with Alice, Jasper and Edward "chest bumping" was hot! I wanna see too!


I swore I heard him muttering something about "seeing you naked" ~*~*~*~*~*~*~* ROFLOL! I forgot about that. Hehehehe, I love a flustered Edward. That is going to drive him insane that Jasper saw "any" of her before he did. LOL! I'm sure at some point Emmett will remind him of it too.


The date went great. They were both so adorable. I was surprised that they were able to keep things so chaste with all the food moans. ;o) Kudos to them for staying strong. It's better this way of course. Even if the rest of us are lemon h00rs and ready for some action ;oP I loved Bella's couch confession too. Hehehe it may have been a faux pas but it was still true. Be does "like Edward better" and we *all* know it.

I cant wait for tue. and to see just how long these 2 can hold off before moving to the next level.

As always, great chapter, love the story, cant wait for more!
FairestLady chapter 6 . 7/21/2010
please don't let her " spout inappropriately " again , i think next time i will die of embaressement or something .

poor bella , i think you enjoy torturing her like you do smugward in taste of innocence :D . well , keep torturing them , it's fun .

love, salma :)
katelyndc chapter 6 . 7/21/2010
Bella is rather amusing, but Jasper and Alice throw in some fun, too. Of course, Edward and Emmett are going to have a blast with the 'modeling' video of Jasper.

Thanks for the update-Kate
confettirainfall chapter 6 . 7/21/2010
Wow. They didn't even have sex and I'm all hot and bothered! *snickers* great chapter. Love this story!
CullenCovenMember chapter 6 . 7/20/2010
Loved this chapter! It was very funny :) haha please update soon!
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