TutorGirlml chapter 1 . 2/9/2011
Somehow I hadn't managed to read this one yet, even though I read almost all of your stories once I find them. You get the pain and emotional torture of Jess' death so very right in this. Because of the type of show CSI:NY is, Flack doesn't deal with his sorrow on camera, but this has to mirror what his character's going through. It's so sad I was almost crying in the coffeehouse where I was reading. Wow, so good even if it was nearly painful to read as well. You really write Flack like pretty much no one else I've ever read.
23roses chapter 1 . 4/19/2010
this breaks my heart...
conche chapter 1 . 4/12/2010
I really enjoyed this story and have not actually enjoyed much of the season until now because this part has been missing. It's not that we didn't see a reaction from Detective Flack after killing Simon or not that he didn't start to talk about it, but I like the way you explored and explained Flack's behavior.
Ilmare-Ilse chapter 1 . 4/12/2010
Thank you for sharing this.

I love how you portray Don, and the pain he has been through these last few months.

I really liked it!
pineapplehell chapter 1 . 4/12/2010
Brilliant :)
afrozenheart412 chapter 1 . 4/12/2010
These words describing how life has been for him since Jess's death are powerful. From the very first days where he couldn't even get out of bed to using anything and anyone to make his grief go away for even a little while were brutal but touching. I think you managed to get through every stage of grief here, but what broke me was learning that he was planning on proposing to Jess on her birthday, in front of her family. *sniffs* I really wish that had happened.

I never thought I would miss the ties but I do. And he is still good looking with his casual clothes but yeah, I miss the suits too. What I have to commend you most on is seeing the rest of the cases he has been involved in through his eyes. I didn't like how abruptly they cut his grief out of the show. I'm sorry I can't be more eloquent or convey the depth of how this moves me. But I just want to hug him and tell him it will be alright when I know it won't. Damn the writers!

Favorite lines

"It's been almost a year a no day goes by that I dont think about you.

It still hurts. Not as badly as it did the first few weeks, when I could barely function at all, but it still requires every ounce of determination to get through the day without breaking something (or God forbid, someone) out of sheer frustration. Or to simply not break down.

As it is with most things in life, it is the small things that get me."

"Speaking of promises… I know I owe your old man an apology for standing them up on your birthday… I'm sorry, Jess, I just… and they had no way of knowing… remind me again whose brilliant idea it was to set your birthday as the deadline for moving in together? Oh yeah… it was mine. It was also my plan to get down on one knee in front of your parents with a little black velvet box in one hand and my heart on the other. I just kept that last bit to myself…

So when I saw them gathered around the table toasting your memory I just couldn't get out of the car. That toast should have been to celebrate our marriage, damn it! Just too fucking unfair…

… and all the baby steps forward I had taken suddenly became a huge leap back."

"Although he had killed several people, my heart went out to him. Watching the woman you love die in front of you…

God, Jess, I'm sorry… I know I promised you I'd stop crying, but I can't. I love you, I love the job, but it brings me more grief than joy most days."

"I brought you some flowers, by the way. Gardenias, not roses. Your folks have done a good job of keeping your grave all nice and clean and I wanted to contribute somehow. I know I don't come by often, but that's mainly your fault; you hang around my place so often I don't feel the need to come and see you here. Me bad, I know, but I've always loved having you around… and even now my place's a lot cozier than yours.

Love you Jess. Always will."