|Reviews for Randle's Angel|
| Jade chapter 1 . 2/22/2013
Hi!It is very interesting! Excuse for illiteracy, I from Russia!
| Anonymous chapter 1 . 10/9/2012
Stop writing forever.
| thetaxidriver001 chapter 1 . 10/1/2011
Interesting, I like how you make her sound exactly like her dad.
| America Liberty chapter 1 . 8/1/2011
I love it!
| Ermansfield chapter 1 . 7/30/2011
really interesting very creative
| Thinkin' Inside The Box chapter 1 . 12/3/2010
nice prolougue. may wanna work on the spelling of certian words including:
ofcourse (it's two words)
Also next time look a 'bit more into the structure of your sentences. They look to me a little like "and the im going... and then she is going to.. and then sally told me..."-esc. And looks at character diolougue a 'bit as well.. it sounds drony. Sorry, I know everybody's a critic and me well I'm a grammer and writing freak. So maybe look at that for next time. Any questions? PM me..
| Tom Ross chapter 1 . 7/31/2010
It's a nice little prologue. I like the bit about the chair. You should probably work on making the shrink's dialogue sound a little bit more professional (possibly just have her be more curt). There are some excellent similes and metaphors in here, bark of a tree come to mind, but you could probably trim a lot of the description-tedious things like raising an annoyed brow-which slow down the narrative.
Keep on writing!