|Reviews for Queen of All Oni|
| MultiplePersonas chapter 10 . 11/15
This was an exciting take on an episode that I, too, never really loved. The episode had a lot of Tarakudo and a lot of Scruffy, and you made a good story despite the lack of the former and the possession of the latter.
Can't blame Macdonald for trying to set up Jackie and Viper (lord knows the fanbase has), but the real comedy is how little investment he has in the battle. He helps, sure, but he's playing Cupid the whole time.
I'm noticing less snark from Jade. Is it because of her change in personality, or just because it's deceptively hard to write? Total sympathy if it's the latter, though.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 9 . 9/6
Those two parts sure were different. The first one was really creative, showing off personifications and representations of all of the aspects of Jade's mind. I love when people do that in fiction. There are so many cool ways to interpret the mind and personality, it always ends up enjoyable. Her heroic aspect alone was amazing. So hilarious! That said, I feel like a little more detail could have been given to his hammy behavior, to really turn it up to 11.
The other half was harder for me to follow, since Japanese folklore isn't my specialty, and I'm even worse with Japanese history. Still, the imagery was strong, and the characters were compelling. This story really deserves all of the praise it has gotten.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 8 . 8/28
Well, that was exciting. Most of the chapter was a drawn-out fight scene. I know from experience that those can be really hard to write, so kudos.
As always, Hak Foo is hilarious in combat. I always love when people question his moves' names. I get the feeling that half are real, half are made up on the spot.
The nature of this artifact is intriguing, too. And for once a magic object is properly guarded. Can you believe the Pan'ku box was just lying there in the show? Dumb. But these monks are the real deal. Clearly the trained most of their lives for this. I will note, though, a small mistake: When Brother White was first mentioned, he was called Brother Light. Just calling 'em as I sees 'em.
Seriously, though, this chapter was a lot of fun and just the break I needed right now. Sorry for such a long break between reviews.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 7 . 4/22
That was an awesome adventure! You know, I often worry with some fics that they're basically just going to do a real-life episode, practically verbatim but with some minor changes, and I'll admit the fear has crept in once or twice with this fic, but I'd say this chapter has finally put that fear to bed. Ikazuki was spot-on, right down to his craving for human brains (doesn't he know they're pure cholesterol?), and it was awesome to see him put Jade in her place (not that I don't like her, but this was just really cool).
The skirmish over the mask was an excellent short fight scene, and Hak Foo's attack names are always fun. I loved how you used the baggage carousel, too.
Viper's adjusting well to the team, even if she's not very learned in magic. She knows Jade's weaknesses, and that's much more valuable.
And Uncle wants to work with Daolon Wong? Again?! What ancient spell could he possibly want? Guess I'll find out later.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 6 . 4/22
This chapter may not be long, but it was entertaining. It had some serious world-building, telling us something really traumatic in Jade's past that will likely shape her for life. You know, my parents used to throw parties like that every year. I was lucky if there was one other child. I was totally ignored, but still forced to be on my best behavior. Yeah, I get that what happened with Jade was worse, I'm just saying I can relate.
It's also cool to see that Tarakudo used to be human. Clearly, he's got a backstory coming. I look forward to it.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 5 . 3/9
I thought Viper's introduction went very well. Sure, it's Jackie who dislikes her more than Uncle, but Uncle's opinions of her were added to further fuel his feelings of inadequacy when he was proven wrong, so I can't fault you for good storytelling. And yeah, she's basically an adult Jade, so she's going to be an invaluable member of the team. I hope this doesn't mean El Toro will also be joining long-term. I mean, he's okay, but he'd obviously bring Paco *disgusted sound*.
You took some pretty heavy influence from the second episode of season 4, but you changed enough to keep it interesting. Jade certainly makes a more interesting villain than Tarakudo-what with her having a more definite and sympathetic origin, and it being about rescuing her rather than defeating her. And is it just me, or are the henchmen actually more competent here? Jade is bringing out the best in them.
| MultiplePersonas chapter 4 . 3/6
Jade actually makes a pretty good mob boss, doesn't she? I guess that's not surprising. Dark as this is, it's nice to see her find an outlet for her energy and intelligence.
All joking aside, it's pretty awesome to see the oni masks incorporated into this alternate timeline. I figured they'd be more loyal to Jade, showing respect to the Queen of the Shadowkhan. Don't know why I thought that. But if this is happening, Tarakudo is sure to get involved sooner or later. Hopefully it won't get too romantic there. A love story between an ancient floating head and a twelve-year-old girl is NOT what I clicked on!
It's also only now hitting me how disadvantaged Jackie is without Jade. She came to the rescue so many times, and now the team is down a valuable member. Jackie, Uncle, and Tohru will have to be more cunning and resourceful than ever against Queen Jade.
One more thing! You made a big deal of Jade getting Scruffy, but we never saw him here. I figured he'd at least appear as they evacuated the hideout.
Anyway, I'm loving this story, even if I'm super late to the party. Cheers!
| org13fan chapter 29 . 2/22
I loved this story. It was one of the first fanfics I read and I'll miss it.
| MitchellTF chapter 29 . 1/28
Poor Viper. I really, REALLY feel bad for her. She kinda got things the worst, in part because she was pushed into villainy, and didn't get 'redemption', in a sense. I hope she can get a happy ending.
| KaliAnn chapter 6 . 1/28
Your interlude was fascinating, to see some of Jade's past.
| KaliAnn chapter 4 . 1/27
A relatively entertaining chapter
| KaliAnn chapter 3 . 1/27
Jade is seriously getting very scary.
| KaliAnn chapter 2 . 1/27
I liked how you wrote about the events through the eyes of the Enforcers.
| KaliAnn chapter 1 . 1/27
I loved the slow build up until Jade transformed into the Queen.
| wondertown9 chapter 29 . 1/13
I have had to read this chapter like four times in order to properly register everything that happens on it. Blankman straight up wins, Viper is God-knows-where doing God-knows-what in order to become human again, El Toro gets involved with Mexico's supernatural community... and Jade ends this story in a much hopeful and bright tone than I expected. Not that there is anything wrong with it. It's extremelly satisfying to see Jade go through all the development and face all the consequences that her "quest for power" has generated. And even though we end the story in a similar situation than the one we began at, it couldn't be more different. And albeit I arrived very late to the party, I must say it's been a delight to read this story. Frankly, I doubt the JCA community in FF would have reached the point it's in now if not for PDJ.
So... many thanks to you. That's all that needs to be said.