|Reviews for End of the Circle|
| Pardus Ardens chapter 5 . 7/30/2005
Sorry I took so long, but I like to make a habit of reading the material done by my reviewers. To start with the most general and overarching aspects, I've got to say that the story concept is great, and genuinely moving in places-not campy or schmaltzy, but with the same moments of striking, powerful writing in the manga (I still get sad thinking about the middle of Book 8 ;_; ). Excellent use of vocabulary, no really major technical complaints.
I do have some doubts as far as keeping true to the setting, though... if this "Lord of the South" is a creation of your own, I'd have liked to see it followed up a bit more, for example. Also, I have the impression that there weren't any Factory Farms west of the Rockies or otherwise outside the Great Plains sort of area. While the Zero designation of the AR series isn't canon, it makes sense... but only after reading most of the story, at least to me. It might have been nice if I'd better understood, as a BA fan, how Serobi was supposed to fit in from earlier in the story-moreover, it would have been one less thing reminding me that I'm a reader outside the story. Suspension of disbelief, and all. Similarly, I was totally baffled by the Behemoth in the beginning, but it was nice to see that it really paid off.
For whatever reason, more than once, I caught myself skimming ahead, looking for the action.. which makes me wonder if there might be a little more detail than necessary, or else passages which didn't seem to really bring the story forward... but I say this with reluctance, since I can't exactly put a finger on it, myself. I'm not sure what else to say, other than that seeing the parallels between Serobi's first scene and Jasmine's delerium subscenes (I promise, whenever I get Vision 4 finished, they'll make sense!) I had to chuckle. Great minds think alike, hey?
Anyway. All in all, a very good read. I like it better than books three through five of Last Order. Write in Desty Nova, and it'll be PERFECT. *nods sagely*
| Every person who ever lived has atleast some merit chapter 1 . 8/7/2002
There is no such thing as an one dimensional character in real life. Everyone has their reasons, fears, hopes, and dreams. Most people tend that forget this simple truth. Maybe because it makes ignoring these 'unimportant' people easier. Maybe it is to protect ones heart. What ever the reason, this story pointly and poeticly drove home this point that I almost forgotten.
Even though it is true that this story needed to be trimmed of some of its more unnecessary parts, it is still a well crafted, depressingly beutiful story. It is the best Battle Angle fanfic I have ever read, and one of the best one shot action stories I have read and trust me, that is alot.
"To feel pain, you must be alive."
(p.s I hope you write a sequal. I think it would be best to make it far, far into the future. Someone should probly stumble on to her like how Ido found Atila.)
| Elliot Bowers chapter 1 . 3/29/2002
_Mon Dieu... What a night! Where to begin?
Okay, first up, I have to talk about the negative-
particularly the flow. For one, you didn't seem
to have enough plot; much of the early part of this
work seemed to be ambiance-setting. Ambiance is
good, but we need more plot! Also, you could-and
maybe even SHOULD-break this "chapter" into two
or even three more chapters. Because, as it stands,
I got the feeling that this work droned on with
little pause other than asterisks to break things
up. And, thirdly, was there something wrong with
the font? On the browser I'm using, the punctuation
seems jinxed up-like someone's alter-ego saw it
fit to scramble up the HTML here. That goes to
talk about faults.
_Now, what was good about this piece? If read
as something not too closely set in the Gunnm
universe, read more as a stand-alone piece, this
was interesting. Showing those kids live relatively
mundane and civillian lives while so much darkness
and oddity was happening nearby was an interesting
contrast. But, the main thematic attractions were
the gynoids-those robot-females. How they felt
and how others felt regarding them made for some
intrigue to keep me reading a bit more. So, then,
read less as a Gunnm piece and more as science
fiction in-general, this work has worth. (Yeah,
don't worry: In about two more weeks, you can
critically slam my upcoming Gunnm fanfiction novel
| vash chapter 1 . 2/9/2002
Nice fic, it really should get more credit. Off the subject, Buick, how did you write a fic for a series that wasn't available? I'm writing a fic for the anime series, "Parallel Trouble Dual", but it isnt on the list of anime series...
| reader chapter 1 . 2/7/2002
That was a nice fic. I enjoyed it. It doesnt get enough credit, or notice. Ahh well