|Reviews for Echoes of the Forgotten|
| Guest chapter 1 . 11/20/2017
I hate Wing I hate pepper and salt
| NightlyRowenTree chapter 24 . 6/15/2015
Thank you so much for the heads up
| Phantomflower chapter 23 . 9/14/2014
It's been a long time, but I'm glad that there's been an update. Where to start?
Bat has made some smart points here. He is showing good judgement by not allowing his children to be pulled into the Mayu-Cross affair. At the same time, he is right that Cross abandoned Mayu. This was nicely handled.
Julia and Maria need to 'blend in' for the Grandmaster? Does this mean they're going to Ohu? If so, they won't be able to stay undercover for long.
Dogs under the the Grandmaster's influence are described as having certain characteristics. Mainly, dark bags under the eyes. Mayu must have told Weed about this when briefing him about the clan. She herself would recognize the sisters. It will not end well.
Wing thinking that George is a girl is funny. As is Cross leaving Bat and George alone to bond.
They're not main characters by any means, but why not any action with Hiro and Reika's litter? They're the only puppies in Ohu besides Mayu and Bat's. Is it because of the argument their parents had at dinner?
It's progressing well. Keep it up.
| Jarjaxle chapter 23 . 9/14/2014
I am competently Honest here and Say this...D O...N O T...Y O U... G...T R Y... T O...S T O P...AND... T...AGAIN!
Well Bat at least is clever minded and allows Cross to meet her grandchildren. tough it is quite humorous that anyone can but Wings loyalty by offering him food. I somewhat hope tough that Mayu does not arrive abck early...that would be total receipt of Chaos, Drama and shouting. let's see were you are taking this fic
| Jarjaxle chapter 22 . 4/13/2014
This is getting more and more interesting, especially now when Cross and Mayu have met and entire Ouh knows about basic situation between them.
Now Drama starts to grow up, Cross made, have to say, Idiotic mistake, when she met with Mina and Mayu. Next Chapter will be most interesting, Cross meet her other grandchildren and George have to learn to be Uncle. Let's hope that Batto allows it...
Oh man...so this is going to be upated very slowly from here on? boo, Update soon!
| Phantomflower chapter 22 . 1/21/2014
Ohh boy. It looks like Mayu had gone too hard on Mina. The poor thing seems to be at the breaking point.
Don't make Mayu let go of the lingering feeling that's she's been too hard on Mina. It really isn't fair how she's treated different from her brothers.
Has is occured to Mayu that she should explain to Mina why she reacted to Cross in that way? It doesn't need to be complicated. Honesty is the best policy, after all.
Something to the tone of "Cross was the dog who gave birth to your uncle Mao and I, but she abandoned us when we were pups. Finding out she made a new family and forgot about us has made me angry. I don't want you to talk with her. Cross is not as nice as you think. How about you spend more time with your father and I?" could be enough.
In one passage, it mentions how Drake eats pups for enjoyment (eww). For some reason, Cain's name is where Drake's should be (Cain had eaten that pup while it was alive, feeling his pain and savoring it). Please fix it.
Ohu will need to send some platoons to deal with the Clan and soon. The Setsu incident has caused some panic in Ohu, I'm sure.
That's another problem - who will the Grandmaster choose as her container with Setsu dead?
Cross' sons are good dogs. Maybe the experience will be good for George.
Even Mina's sons are realizing how their sister is being treated differently. Hopefully, there is a solution.
You're handing it over to your co-author? That's alright. Sometimes, we need to take a step back from writing.
| Princess Unikitty chapter 21 . 10/4/2013
looks great so far
| Phantomflower chapter 21 . 6/3/2013
Beautiful. There are many things I like about this chapter.
First, bringing back Drake was a good idea. He's shaping up to be a good opponent for Ohu.
In his situation, Tesshin needs to not only get his wounds treated, but alert Ohu and the Koga elder. The elder will not be happy about a traitor in the midst. Among ninjas/shinobi, betrayal is very bad. Perhaps Teru or one of the other puppies can be sent to Ohu as a messenger?
I like how Mayu is being honest and frank with Mina about the danger that comes with their gender. The little pup will need to defend herself from pushy, overbearing males as she gets older. Mayu is also realizing some of her parenting mistakes.
She may not like Cross, but I hope Mayu will realize that she will be an invaluable ally against the Clan. Cross is powerful, even in her old age, and will likely not spare mercy for the ones who murdered her son. Preventing her from visiting Mina would be a bad idea.
I would like to see Cross and Mayu come to an agreement, more of Kuro and Wing (where are those boys in this mess?), Ohu preparing for the Clan, and the Clan causing problems for other allies of Ohu (example: Kisaragi and his sons, maybe even Gin's former owner, Daisuke; the Clan doesn't seem too picky on victims).
I can't wait for the next chapter.
| Dark Scimitar chapter 21 . 5/30/2013
This is a terrific chapter. Tesshin's an underused character in my opinion and the fight scene in this chapter was fantastically written for him. Also, I truly feel bad for both Cross and Mina. Neither one of them can seem to catch a break at all. I'm definitely looking forward to seeing where you take this.
| Phantomflower chapter 20 . 9/16/2012
This was a nice chapter. I wonder what's in store for Alucard after the questioning. Mayu is horrified at the discovery of Setsu's corpse. Bat and Mina have some father/daughter time. Cross is being comforted by Ben.
Things I'd like to see in the future: more Ben/Cross interaction, George reappearing, the Grandmaster rallying the Clan, and mother/daughter moments with Mayu and Mina.
As always, I can't wait for more.
| Phantomflower chapter 19 . 6/15/2012
This is very shocking. Setsu is now dead. I assume the two dogs watching from afar are Cain and Alucard. Their futures are now in question due to her death.
The Grandmaster will need to be informed somehow. She will be very pissed. Hopefully, she gets that Akakabuto possessing Setsu was not something she or certain others could prevent. Another container will have to be prepared, and she does not have much time left.
If Mayu is allowed to see Setsu's corpse (to show her what nearly killed her daughter), will she talk about knowing her, even if they hated each other? This is a prime time to introduce the Clan's threat to Ohu.
Again, it is nice to see Mina bond with her grandmother. Please do more of those sorts of scenes. Maybe have her bring Kuro once!
Although I spotted an error (Gin calling Ben 'Dad' when George should be), this is good writing. I would love to read more.
| Phantomflower chapter 18 . 4/10/2012
There are many things I like about this chapter.
Akakabuto's spirit being channeled by Setsu was very unexpected. It sounds like Akakabuto is using her to destroy the Ohu army. For both them and the Clan, it will not end too well.
Cain and Alucard are out of their depth, though. The Grandmaster will likely find the dead dogs soon. If so, will there be signs of Setsu channeling a spirit in the wounds of her victims?
All creatures cannot go without water for long, however. Even if she can go all of that way without food, Setsu cannot last too long without water; dehydration will set in quickly. Akakabuto should have her stop to drink before Ohu.
There is no point in possessing a dog if that dog is going to be weak from lack of water.
I liked the Mayu/Bat and Cross/Mina interactions a lot. What will happen when Alucard and Mayu meet again? With Setsu's destination, they're going to meet again for sure. It's inevitable.
Good job. This is the first Story Alert I've gotten in months, so I'm very happy.
| Phantomflower chapter 17 . 10/3/2011
Wow, so much is going on in this chapter. Setsu has ran away and now Alucard and a search party must find her. Possibly, this could lead all of them to Ohu. If that happened though, Cain might be in for some hurting from Mayu and maybe Bat (if he was told about Cain at some point). And maybe Wing should not eat so much, LOL! Poor Mina. Wing needs to learn that he can't exclude his sister from his games.
I can't wait for the next development.
| Phantomflower chapter 16 . 7/30/2011
Well, this was an interesting chapter. Kuro just wants to make sure that Mayu is okay. Family issues are rising to a head. It was cute of Mina to call George 'grumpy mister'. If only George was a little more friendly to puppies...
The Grandmaster is still alive! I'm guessing that she is preparing to transfer the spirits into Setsu and switch containers. Of all the notable Clan dogs, Zakura is dead, and Lazarus, Cain, Drake, and Alucard are unaccounted for. Mako, Julia, and Maria still appear to be around. Were Cain and/or Alucard maybe killed because of the Mayu thing? The Grandmaster has her ways. Then again, Alucard's ghost would probably appear to Mayu (or near her) if he were dead.
Still, keep going! The Clan has something brewing...
| uknown chapter 15 . 6/18/2011
please write more I'm desperate to know wat happens next poor Mao (howls in sadness and excitment)