|Reviews for Survival|
| Jane Poirot chapter 7 . 5/26/2012
Wow, I read all this in one sitting. And is it ever good. You create an excellent atmosphere of suspense and emotional intensity. I also like how you keep the more horrific bits to our imagination before confirming them in the last chapter, but at the same time not giving away too much detail. James gave me the creeps a lot throughout and was effective as a sociopath without coming across as over-the-top.
My one bit of concrit is that the style felt a little short and abrupt, like you could've gone into more detail with the descriptions. And while I just praised you for not giving away too much detail, at the same time a bit more would've been a bit nice. But overall, this was done very, very well and I look forward to the sequel.
| owlhero chapter 1 . 4/2/2011
Its mysterious and omnious at the same time just as I wanted to be. I cant wait to read the next chapter.
| Pond-88 chapter 7 . 3/15/2011
Wow, great story! I can't wait for the sequel!
| MissBenji chapter 7 . 2/2/2011
One word wow o and poor boys o and good story o and. CAN'T WAIT FOR THE SEQUEL!
| purple909 chapter 7 . 11/23/2010
You know, I was rereading this and I am so totally wondering what was going on at the Tipton during everything. Like, what was Carey, , London, and Maddie thinking? This story is so awesome and I've read the sequels! This is just a suggestion, you know. Love always, purple
| Lady Alice101 chapter 7 . 10/10/2010
this is a good story... cant wait for the sequel... i must say, i am very frazzeled and scared at the moment...
| Lady Alice101 chapter 4 . 10/10/2010
ok... well this is a good story and you are a fantastic writer... maybe you can move it up to t? if there is? if there isnt, dont worry about it... i dont think that it needs to be moved up to M... but i havent finished the stroy yet...
| purplerose9793 chapter 3 . 9/6/2010
This is AMAZING! Keep up the good work...
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 7 . 8/31/2010
Easily, by far, the best chapter of the story. This had everything in it. The beautiful brotherly love moment, the happy ending rescue. Guilt, fear, pain. This was a good chapter.
Verdict for the story: Good. Good. Most of the time this story seemed short and disconnected, but in this situation it worked. It made it an easy read. This story could have been 100,000 words if it went into crazy minute by minute detail. I would have liked to see a little more detail and description of emotion though. Setting, setting, setting. That's a big one too. Bottom line - I liked this story.
I'll read part of the sequel tomorrow.
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 6 . 8/31/2010
Another good chapter. I liked seeing a bit into their minds here. You sort of implied their personalities. Zack was confident they'd be okay, Cody was skeptical and negative. I don't know if I said this last chapter, but I think this story would be even better if you described their surroundings. Right now they could be in a sunlit condo overlooking the ocean or a dark, cold, damp cellar. I think that would be the easiest way to further convey emotion here.
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 5 . 8/31/2010
Sickening. Excellent job with this chapter. The lashings were just horrible. It's interesting that James is taking it all out on Cody. It is an effective way to punish Zack, making him feel guilty. Maybe we'll see that in the sequels, however from seeing your summaries it seems that maybe Zack doesn't make it through this. I'll see...
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 4 . 8/31/2010
Again, a little short and disconnected, but it worked. I guess you'll leave us to decide exactly what happened to Cody. Probably fitting because that may warrant an M rating, however I don't think so. Personally, I'm very lenient on the T/M. There really should be a T, that would make everything so much easier.
Yes, I do hate James. Anybody that would do that to anybody is horrible. Let alone two teenagers. I couldn't imagine having to go through that.
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 3 . 8/31/2010
Another emotion-filled chapter, this struck me but not in the same way. I would have liked to see you get a little more in each of their heads. The way this was written (and it was well-written) was tell, not show. I think a story like this demands more of a show, not tell approach.
Verdict: Good chapter. Seemed a little short and disconnected from Zack and Cody though. You've left me wondering exactly what happened to Cody and what will happen to Zack.
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 2 . 8/31/2010
Touching, horrifying, and downright sad. I don't know why but all these stories about Zack and Cody getting hurt or split up are really hitting me hard lately. I can feel Zack's pain and guilt. Touching how he wanted to be taken instead. Horrifying because we don't know what James is planning with them. Sad because of Zack's guilt.
I don't know if it was intentional but the fast pace of the beginning of this chapter was very fitting. I flew through reading it because it didn't drag it all, mostly dialogue. It reflects their excitement and anxiousness very well. Good job.
| Hailfax-McGee chapter 1 . 8/31/2010
'Bout damn time I read this huh? Interesting first chapter. Your villain seems either weird or crazy. I didn't think kidnappers thought it was "fun!" I hope he has some kind of mental craziness going on because crazy villains are the best.
This was a good way to open up a story. Short and sweet and cliffhangery.