|Reviews for Broken Promise|
| crimsontears82684 chapter 1 . 9/24/2013
I love how this story flows.
| Cemalidor chapter 1 . 4/19/2013
Interesting style you are putting up. :) Tragic ending, but live aint a ponyhof.
| Moonlight'sServant chapter 1 . 4/7/2013
Hmm..while I have to say that I am a fan of your work (I have been exploring your profile ever since I read Why Kakashi Shouldn't Read Outloud) and I do think that you are a brilliant author, I have to be frank.
This is the worst of your work from what I've read so far. True, I have not read all of your stories (only the Naruto fanfiction, and even then only some) and this is one of your older works and you have improved since then, but my statement still stands.
While I personally have no qualms against Sakura's death, for I hate her with a fiery passion, how the outcome happened and the way it built up just seems...wrong.
All characters involved were extremely out of character. I wouldn't imagine Naruto being capable of killing Sakura despite what she did (though you managed that deceitful, selfish part of Sakura quite well) and even if he could, I'd imagine him experiencing different, ranging emotions and inner turmoil; he loves Sakura to death, the poor fool. Not anger (unless his emotions caused him unleashed to unleash the Kyubi).
And especially his thoughts at the end (or beginning, considering the format). Becoming a nuke-nin and even going to Orochimaru? He loves the village to death, and he abhorrs Orochimaru to the core. He also knows that going and giving into Orochimaru would give the Snake sannin an immensely powerful pawn to control, and could indirectly cause him to endanger the Leaf. I can't imagine him EVER doing those without good reason.
Sakura...as I've said, she is quite deceitful and selfish and considering this is occuring in Pre-Shippuden her actions aren't that farfetched. However, she does have a sense of shame, and deliberately playing on Naruto like that then cheating on him with Sasuke is not something she's capable of. At least, not shamelessly.
Moreover, with her actions I would have believed that it would have spread around the village causing her to be ostracized by everyone, especially by their agemates. Considering she has a loudmouth Naruto as her "boyfriend", who'd probably brag about it or something of equal manner, a gossipy Ino as her best friend with an equally loud mouth, and she lives in a village filled with nosy, judgemental shinobi and civilian alike, I highly doubt she could have kept it a secret.
Also, I highly doubt Ino would be gladly helping her along with her wedding, considering what I've said above. And that Ino was her former rival for Sasuke and the kind of person who won't be able to put up with someone getting hurt like this.
Lastly, Sasuke. Everything he did was out of character. Period.
Also, I highly doubt that the village elders would take his attempt at treason lightly, despite being crippled for life. Also, he is the village's lone member possessing the Sharingan, a VERY much valued dojutsu. That is all.
Oncw again, I'd like to say that you have vastly improved and that you seem to be talented. I hope that you continue improving and that you weren't bothered by this very lenghty review. My apologies if I've somehow insulted you in any way, shape or form.
| rebecca chapter 1 . 1/2/2013
Wow. I liked your writing format! Going back in time from the shocking result to see all the layers of complication peeling away was fascinating.
| don't worry about my name chapter 1 . 9/20/2012
As much as I'm shocked to admit it, your a talented writer. I kind of like some of your stories, but I have to say, for a one-shot, this was pretty damn good. You should tell us what happens after Naruto kills Sakura though. I never really liked her much anyway.
| ali-jae chapter 1 . 8/31/2012
whoa how sad i can't believe the what sakura did! :((( awww but i feel bad for all of them
| Aisucold chapter 1 . 8/29/2012
wow, that was deep..
| RykOakwine chapter 1 . 8/16/2012
I love this story. The only thing its lacking is more of Sakura gurgling in her own blood realizing what she's done.
| So I'm Kevin chapter 1 . 8/15/2012
You know it sad thing is that this could easyizily happen in the manga. When sakura added to the promise with being Naruto's and only Naruto's if he brought Sasuke back it probably made Naruto so happy & determined to bring Sasuke back that he crippled him just to make Sakura happy. The reason that Sakura change in the manga and became Tsunade student was because she saw the damage and the extremes Naruto went for her promise, and that guilt lead to her becoming a medic. Here on the other hand she saw Sasuke crippled and probably remembered when Lee was said to never be a ninja again and the Tsunade healed him so she probably thought if she bacame a good enought medic she could heal Sasuke's damages as well. Here sakura thought process in both cases:
Manga: he didn't bring sasuke back that's sad...(enters room)OH GOD! NARUTO! wait he's going on about he's promise...he ...he got injured... because... because of me... he went this far and got this hurt because of my promise i forced upon him... i can't just keep saying i have to get stronger i have to do something about it wait the new hokage is a medic maybe she could teach me?... I have to ask?
Here on the other had was this: Sasuke is crippled... well he can't leave me any more...wait isn't the new hokage a medic didn't she heals lee injuries maybe i could heal Sasuke's by the time he's heal we'll be so close to each other he will never leave me... wait what everyone talking about what do they mean that I have to love Naruto NOW?! HE IS the one that hurt Sasuke this bad?! WAIT WHAT PROMISE?! ...oh well i guess i have to date Naruto now he's an idiot maybe in a few years he will forget about the promise or get bored with me then i can be with sasuke how bad could it be?
THAT'S the difference between this fic and the manga she never had to she the extent of the damage or the length naruto would go for her or her promise she instead saw Sasuke injured and naruto once again being in her way. She never had to see how far he would go or how much he would get injured for her promise or her love. as for her forget that part of the promise it was probably out of guilt she remember that her promise to love naruto is what crippeled Sasuke she might think that naruto could have brought back sauske if she didn't say that so it her fault that sasuke is injured but wait it can't be her fault because she loves him it was naruto that did that but it was bacuase of her promise o she omited that part from her memory eventually making her wonder why she with naruto? so she went back to sasuke. she a girl that never had to grow up or face her problems.
Sasuke on the other had had lost his entire goal in life because of said promise but couldn't hate ethier who cause it. He couldn't hate naruto cause he knew it was bacause of sakura naruto went that far. he couldn't hate sakura because she was their for him. he probably knew about the promise and try to not get close to sakura at first because that would make what happened to him pointless, but she eventually got close to him because of the fact that she was the one that help him threw his troubling time he eventually got a close ashe could get to falling in love with her or atleast wanted to make her happy for helping him. he was a man who clung to her because of lonleyness and depression.
Naruto is a man who lost everything because of a broken promise.
:side not i always wonder this when i was reading the review section "has anyone go back and read the manga" because i am wondering if i missed the chapter that sakura hit him because of him trying to ask her out on a date? THe closes ones i could find were when sakura hit him because he wokeup and insulted lee (in her mind) after he saved them all or at least held of the sound nin for a bit, and when sakura hit naruto because he was bragging to konohamaru about her being her girlfriend (or alteast not tell telling them that not the case) before the chunin exam but after sasuke said that she was worst than naruto. also here seem to be how the group normally ask each other:
Sakura: (ask for date hopefully)
Sasuke: (replys no in a cold, and uncaring way then leaves)
Sakura: (feels sad)
Naruto: (ask for date in a happy go lucky way)
Saurka: (replys in with word sasuke said to her but heated and angry then leaves feeling better about herslef and forget the whole Sasuke sayingg no and will try tomorrow)
Naruto: (feels sad)
| dogbertcarroll chapter 1 . 5/19/2012
Ouch, but a well deserved fate I believe.
| Neowww chapter 1 . 11/29/2011
Wow! This is one of the best one shots I've ever read. It really got to me because this is something I often think when thinking about a possible Naru/Saku. The list of bullshit she did to him is endless: Treated him like scum for years; She thought she was better than him throughout all part 1, even though she was completelly useless during that time; Got him to promise to bring Sasuke back (How fucked up is that? How can a girl do all kinds of shit to a guy who always did everything in his power to make her happy and get her to respect and like him, and then ask this guy, who she knows is in love with her, to risk his life to bring back some other guy, who she loves and knows the first guy is aware of that, who knocked her unconscious, betrayed their village and always treated her like crap, even though she knows all of this hurts the first mentioned guy's heart to no end? Fuck that); It took all hell to break loose and some guy who has no idea what feelings are like (I mean Sai) to tell her she screwed up for her to realise just how much bullshit she has given Naruto over the years, and then she dares to kind of offer him a pity fuck and lie to him saying she loves him when it's obvious as hell she does not, and she thinks she can trick him into believing that; Even after Sasuke has done all kinds of evil and disturbing shit, tried to kill her and those close to her she still likes him better than Naruto. Fuck all that crap, she is not worthy of him. Your fic got all this bitch attitude of hers perfectly and threw it at the reader's face. I got pissed for Naruto while reading it. It also got that little creepy feel to it, with Naruto doing that, but after reading it to the end you can't help but feel he is right.
The way it was written was awesome. This fic wouldn't be nearly as good as it is if you had put in the chronological order. The frustration and rage build up steadily as time goes back and at the end it all comes together greatly. Reading it left me totally awed.
A masterpiece of a tregedy one shot fic.
| Noa Nee chapter 1 . 8/30/2011
horrible I mean good story but the concept is just horrible. sakura is horrible sasuke is horrible poor naruto i just hate sakura she's just...horrible
| Zeobide274 chapter 1 . 8/28/2011
damn...not much else i can say. this was a well told story if a bit tragic.
| Addster chapter 1 . 6/1/2011
Wow, this was pretty deep and dark at some bits, mostly the beginning.
OMG, Naruto just up and killed her. Daym, it's about time someone did something about her!
But getting back to your amazing story, it was great. The way you went back was such a breath of fresh air, I think that really added significantly to the entire piece.
Job well done!
| Bobcat96 chapter 1 . 5/10/2011
this is the reason why i dont read NaruSaku, she is never good enough for him, canon or fanfic, unless you give her an OC's personality