|Reviews for the butterfly theorem|
| manhattan martini chapter 1 . 7/25/2010
"And he offers a wave while she offers a very un-regal finger."
My favorite line in the whole story. While I really love your metaphors, that made me laugh unexpectedly - and I'm always the one for laughing, especially when I'm concentrated into the bittersweet story.
I really liked this; I'm a fan of this pairing and of course that you delivered it wonderfully. :)
| aestheticisms chapter 1 . 7/19/2010
*blinks* This was...fantastic. Amazing, beautiful. I loved it.
| Mister Melancholy chapter 1 . 6/28/2010
This was so pretty. I love your writing style! 3 All the more, I love this pairing to bits! Sad to say, there's not much love for it... I'd really like to see more Valetshipping from you!
| ibuberu chapter 1 . 6/10/2010
This is wonderfully sad and romantic at the same time, Bijou. I really like the plot and the last few heartrending paragraphs. The wording was so rare and unique, as usual, and I adored the way you portrayed Caitlin. I've never thought about her acting un-princesslike, but come to think of it, that would probably happen, wouldn't it? I also like the use of parenthesis here, very nice and great at giving those subtle meanings, like how 'dreams (never) come true'.
So now I'm going to be very picky with the things that could've made the fic better:
1) There's an inconsistency with capitalisation of the statements in parenthesis, usually they would be in lower case with your writing style in this case, but one says '(It was he who destroyed her.)'
2)I think you may want to consider using italics, or apostrophes to separate some parts of the text, such as '(maybe he's tired of all of the silent murmurings of i hate you's)'. Since 'i hate you's' would be the name of the act/term in itself, I think you shoud make it clearer using apostrophes instead of just lumping it in with the rest of the sentence, but that's just a suggestion. The same applies to the phrase 'idon'twantanotherbrokenheart' syndrome, which looks messy, you may want to break up the words with hyphens instead. But I can understand this is your style, so it's really all up to you. Lastly, Darach's letter should definitely be italised or separated from the main body of the fic using apostrophes, because its a letter and Caitlin is reading the words written on it. To put it straight into narrative text would be too awkward, me thinks.
3)'... and almost hangs up at the sound of a hushed hello?'
This is a weird place to put a question mark, in the middle of tentence that doesn't really have any indication of a question being asked. I recommend you separate Darach's words from the sentence like so " ... and almost hangs up at the sound of a hushed 'hello?'. "
4)'So what she really a truly expects is for him to get past the issues, to fly across the past, and to just return safe & sound to her lovely home.'
There's something odd going on with the 'a' between 'really' and 'truly', and I personally find '&' to be superfluous, 'and' would fit nicely instead.
I seriously love the way to painted Caitlin's thoughts though, as well as the rest of the fic with the inclusive of maids and whatnot, simply beautiful work.
| Cookiekitten chapter 1 . 6/9/2010
I liked the present-tense of this story-for some reason it just seemed to make it all the more emotional. I also love the way you characterized Caitlin. She's a princess but sometimes acts in a decidedly un-princessy manner. That really adds a lot to her personality. :D
| occupyredrobin chapter 1 . 6/8/2010
I've never read this pairing before, but your style is interesting and there's a wonderful, compelling emotional aspect to the story. Well done.
| Tyltalis chapter 1 . 6/8/2010
I love valetshipping!