|Reviews for Travel back in time|
| Fi chapter 29 . 4/19
I’m a little confused on who it is she ends up with, is it Kimimaro or gaara?
| Anonimo chapter 2 . 12/11/2017
| Annimo chapter 14 . 7/29/2017
Buen fic pero algunas partes no entendi
| Anonimo chapter 2 . 7/28/2017
| Susnsmsh chapter 29 . 5/26/2017
I don't know where to begin. There were so many pieces started and left never to be mentioned again, plot points never continued, POV issues throughout, and a half developed story that needed a lot more polish. The first two chapters seemed to be written by a completely different author than the rest of the story. The tonal quality of the writing was strange as was the AU that was introduced. Somewhere in there is a great concept, but it was lost underneath a LOT of confusion. This could use a rewrite and potentially become a good read.
| animemangaobsessed chapter 1 . 5/16/2017
a week?! How the hell is she gonna stop the massacre in a week?
| Hana-Taisho chapter 29 . 8/8/2016
This was a lovely story!
| SakuraYukino chapter 29 . 7/31/2016
OMG! This story was sooo beautiful and heartbreaking! I absolutely loved it!
| dvilleza chapter 29 . 7/11/2016
well this was depressing but nice. good job
| A Rabid Fan chapter 13 . 5/26/2016
So yeah I like the fact that you write a lot but I do have quite a few tips for you:
1. Your Sakura is a tad of a Mary Sue. Yes she came from the future but she would still have to work on her physical skills, and she won't have complete knowledge like she does. AKA she wouldn't know that Gaara killed the drunk dude, or that Itachi met Madara. Nope. First of all Itachi wouldn't of told her that as he wasn't as close to her in cannon, second Gaara wouldn't of remembered that detail and/or told her. ALSO even though Future!Sakura has skills, she wouldn't be able to kill Madara like that. Maybe Danzo as she surprised him but not Madara who kicked loads of people's asses. And Itachi loves his village. If he thought Sakura was lying he would do something about it not let it pass.
2. She wouldn't of been let in so easily into the village, especially after the murders of so many prominent members. They would of done a check, or at least asked Suna as they were tentative allies back then. Also the dye - bad idea. You should've said that she altered the pigments in her hair as she is a medic-nin. Her roots would've eventually come in, or they would've found out that she had bought the dye. Ninjas aren't stupid...
3. If Sakura was from the future she would've been smart enough not to spill info to Neji even if she had a relationship with him. Or expected him to love her. As he'd only known her for two days. She wouldn't make such a huge drama over something like that especially cause she's old. And prepubescent Neji wouldn't be attractive to her, especially after she faced a war and assassinations. She is made of bigger stuff. SHE WOULDN'T CRY OVER SOMETHING SO INSIGNIFICANT. ALSO Neji is a popsicle. He is a Ice prince. It is so out of character for him to act like that to her even if she is a Mary Sue. And its also unrealistic for her to act like that to him. She is used to mature Neji and she would realise that they are different. Plus she would be maybe 20 years older (1219? Depends when she chooses to time travel) so a tween would not be attractive to her mature mind. Honest its kind pedo like. Hinata is the COUSIN of Neji, they aren't siblings. If you are going to write a story, please check your facts. Its a turnoff when 'fake' info is inserted unless there is a good reason which is stated. Or at least have more background info and depth...this seems fake and cringy
4. Your writing style is aggravating. I'm sorry to say but if your going to write an action don't do it by using :sob: and :sniff:. PLEASE, please, please write:
After she was done screaming at him she brought a hand to her face to cover a sob.
"You've broken my heart" Sakura sniffed, tears dripping slowly. "It was a bad idea to be with you" This early on. Its literally a couple words more and now the sentence reads more smoothly. The story is better. TADA
So yeah, constructive criticisms. I like the fact that Sakura is overpowered instead of weak. BUT please sort out your facts, your writing style, and the plot. OR get a beta, I won't mind helping if it means you'll advance as a writer.
Until then I have to leave the story as it is cringe-worthy and not in a good way. When you fix it, maybe then I'll read it but until then - sayonara.
A not-so-Rabid and-not-really-a-Fan
| Stella Purple chapter 29 . 4/10/2016
It's over. Nooooooooooooooooooo... :'(
| Stella Purple chapter 7 . 4/10/2016
Love it when sakura teased kakashi! LOLing so hard
I love the reverse harem teasings over here. Hope I'll find plenty more of it in this story!
Nice work you've done here! Would love to read more story like this in the future!
| florence.decostera chapter 8 . 4/9/2016
| Claciro chapter 5 . 2/12/2016
Faking her death around the same time the incident happened isn't a very good idea. It can be used to tracked back to her...
| Claciro chapter 3 . 2/12/2016
Wait. How did Sakura obtain Sharingan?
And why did Hiruzen so easily accept and comply to what the murderer of the 3 elders wrote down like that?