Reviews for Breathe
Kimmie2445 chapter 6 . 9/30/2015
WOW! George was vicious! He got what he deserved. Thank you!
Kimmie2445 chapter 5 . 9/30/2015
It's so heartbreaking to see how they treat her.
Kimmie2445 chapter 4 . 9/30/2015
The negatively of some of the characters are a bit extreme, but like you said, this is your story. Thank you for your hard work. I'm anxious to see how this turns out.
Concerned Reader chapter 6 . 9/12/2015
Hello. You FF was nice at best, but huge blocks of text with no dialogue can be incredibly boring. I've read six chapters thus far, and I am yet to encounter any kind of dialogue. I work as an editor, and read fanfiction for fun, and I strongly suggest that, if you shall continue to write, add dialouge. Your FF made me distant to the characters (whom I dearly love) and felt no connection between any of the characters. I thoroughly enjoyed the first chapter, and I was immediately immersed to the "set-up" you've created, but now I feel that I nothing but a bystander.
HannahBelle chapter 1 . 8/12/2015
though i think the scene here isn't love, but rather lust, which would not last, this is an interesting twist on the old tale. I think the way Jane Austen wrote it ensures a happy marriage between the two, and it really develops the tale. But i do commend you for your good writing and creativity.
Guest chapter 10 . 8/10/2015
36636 y16333
classic lover chapter 24 . 7/17/2015
Thanks ( not ) for ruining Pride and Prejudice for me.
You're a good writer but you are too carroty.
Please do not ever try to change a classic again.
I was horrified after finishing this uh story.
I don't want to be mean but you really did murder P&P
LJKBananagirl chapter 24 . 7/4/2015
I really enjoyed this. Thank you.
I liked the plot very much and let out a gasp of shock at Charles' actions. I thought the Scotland twist was hilarious. Great reading,
beckyzoso chapter 24 . 6/26/2015
Oh my goodness this was great! I love stories where people get what they deserve and where the main characters are against the world. I loved Emily's ending, fantastic. I feel so bad for Caroline's husband though but at least he will be getting a child. And George being hanged was great, what a tosser. I liked how Mary and Kitty turned/are turning out well. I did feel so bad for Jane though geeze! She was being horrible though but to turn into an empty shell who just drinks all day with two wild children what pretty bad. And poor Charles! What an idiot getting mixed up with Emily but he didn't deserve to die.
I loved the passion between E&D and their little preweding meetings in their little tree area.
A very good read with very different ending than anything I could ever dream up! Awesome.
Stevie K chapter 24 . 6/26/2015
I'm confident that this has become my favorite work of Austen fan fiction.
suddenlysingle chapter 8 . 5/26/2015
Type your review for this chapter here...
Johijoha chapter 24 . 4/13/2015
Very well written! that as a first.
Also I find your character interpretations very interesting. To amplify everyones most obvious character trait was insightful and I'm sure an interesting experiment as a writer.
Maybe it was a bit much to not only let Caroline and Lydia end up in the same house but also have Emily be Robert's true love and make them run of together... maybe a bit much, but still kind of satisfying. I loved that you made Jane more of self centred character and to a certain degree I agree with you Jane and Bingly might not have been such a great match at all.
What i found confusing is, that you clearly name the 2005 movie as your inspiration (and I get it, the sexual tension in the proposal scene was off the charts), but this version is the only one I can think of where I always had the feeling that despite all the ridiculousness and noise and bad manners, Mr and Mrs Bennet truly loved and cared for each other and for their daughter (Mrs Bennet actually more than Mr Bennet). I think you interpretation works well with every other version and the book, just not this one. (but maybe that's just me).
One last thing, I would have liked to have an epilogue scene for Mary and Kitty. It might have been extremly interesting to see their perspectives more clearly since they were not directly involved and so might have been able to serve as the only truthful narrators.
All in all, I enjoyed your work immensly and thank you for the great entertainment.
PP fan in NOLA chapter 24 . 3/1/2015
LOVED this story! Pride and Prejudice is my favorite book of all time that I reread every year. This take on the story is unique and lovely! I really like the extremes to which you described the characters in the Bennet family. Your detailed description of their thoughts and actions offers an explanation to their often maddening behavior depicted in the original P&P. It was nice to see Lizzy wash her hands of her selfish family. Lizzy's ending her relationship with her father was regrettable but the man you described deserved that loss. Thanks for your story!
Kilataia chapter 24 . 2/11/2015
Absolutely loved te story!
GUEST chapter 18 . 1/18/2015
That was very well described. I really loved how you pieced everything together from him watching her to acting upon his want for her in this fashion. I loved it!
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