|Reviews for Dragon Age: The Crown of Thorns|
| desdendelle chapter 77 . 5/3
Tov, review time.
1) Story could really use copyediting. It has lots of grammar mistakes and typos.
2) Modern language. Every time I see DA:O characters say "okay" or "it's cool, man" or something similar I get thrown out of the story. It breaks the suspension of disbelief.
1) Interesting story, even if it follows canon closely.
2) Interesting characters, though Raonar is a bit too angsty to my liking.
3) Most people aren't OOC.
| Swanboy chapter 77 . 3/31
Just re-read entire fic and cannot wait to see how this ends up!
Especially how Dirthamen was involved with the betrayal of Mythal.
| hellz swordsman chapter 53 . 2/8
Its a good story. Buts its getting convoluted.
| hellz swordsman chapter 52 . 2/8
Really? The rasengan?
| Guest chapter 43 . 11/5/2016
I'm gonna go skype my brother now, don't mind me...
| graveMonera chapter 77 . 9/8/2016
Well shit indeed.
I loved it. All of it! And I'm loving everything that Theron is doing too!
| Elven-in-name chapter 77 . 9/4/2016
Either you made it on purpose, or you really lacked inspiration, no matter-
You managed to make me not read an entire chapter. Well, not entire. Believe me, I tried. The Leliana part got me confuse, but I decided to ignore it.
But truth be told, I noticed it from the very first sentence that thing are getting to complicated. A lot of word I didn't know helped, too. In short, a recipe for disater.
Maybe too many things to worry about. Too many threads to consider. I don't know...I'm trying to find you excuses.
It's me! Oh, the black cherry on the Dead man's cake!
The moment with the first scroll was tear jerking. It would have been an unique, maybe new feeling from the story, had you not ruined it!
Seriously? The rage, the drunkeness...too rationalized, and cliched respectively.
In fact, I think I touched both aspects in my now forsaken story-baby.
Rage: it cannot be cured. It cannot be stopped, only let burn, bright and fast.
Especilly rage from failure.
Curing drunkennes: so used, so familliar, like you took the idea right from my brain.
In fact, that's the problem I think, everything seemed out of a flashback, so dreary. Boring.
And what's worse...that was me, there. Oghren. I was him...Hopeless. A , oh so much.
And don't get me started on the mood whiplash.
Oh, I know I probably missed something awesome with Flemeth...and Falon'Din, but I don't care.
But...don't worry. By the next update I probably won't read again to give such a tongue lashing. Never again.
Btw, 9:31 means 31'rd year of Dragon Age. Not nine, like you said.
| Leman of the Russ chapter 77 . 9/4/2016
...well then, I can honestly say I wasn't expecting that one. Even though I've been playing around with the exact same idea for Theron, I could never get a method or reasoning to stick. Would you mind explaining the thought process for an apparently 'deceased' Evanuris suddenly turning up disguised as an Dalish hunter? 'Cause I REALLY would like to know.
| Elven-in-name chapter 76 . 8/2/2016
:) well, this was one short and goodie last chapter.
While I consider Trian's 'journey' part to be a work in progress, the real jewel of this chapter was Oghren.
Yeah, he's a LARGE HAM! but I still like him. (humongous ham, more likely).
And I had the idea to turn him into a stick-in-the-ass drill manager, in my story it would be...different.
The improvements/Upgrades to the characters were noted...and filled me with glee. Especially Alistair. And I' a guy! So...
Weather magic? Avvar? Dalish? Subplot?
| Elven-in-name chapter 75 . 8/2/2016
Well, I take this in two ways:
First, there are no words to describe the beauty of this chapter and only if you watched yourself in the mirror for a second and then closed your eyes and watched yourself in the mirror of your own soul to see the beauty of the art piece this is...
Or, second, I'm just full of shit and faking it and I stall to find my words.
Then, it would be mandatory that I said this was awesome with the usual bump in the road...
Yeah, I like the first version better.
Oh, I wanted to say I liked the memoirs but damn, then you had Trian Animus-ed and something snapped. He didn't just read a journal, he lived his life! Felt his sorrow, disbelief, dissapointment, and even pleasure...I'm glad Raonar didn't have the journal with him because that implyed Trian witnessed him fucking Leandra! Or doing it himself! Speaking of intimacy, Trian was allowed to do something more than Rao did( read a few pages from Trian)! And yes...I'm trolling, but at the same time I'm honest. Or maybe I'm just overthinking it...
And the rest of the Orzammar part was awesome. Sad, maybe. How does red lyrium form, actually? Don't answer if it holds spoilers to DA II! About Inquisition I don't really care...
The Titan revelation was THE BEST THING YOU WROTE. Ironic, really, I didn't know what unassaillable means. Though it sounds vaguely familliar...
So he didn't lose his Stone Sense after that, instead he had it amplyfied...only for the What The Fuck moment to come and be rejected(for what?)
And the chapter was self-satisfying. Much like me...
| Elven-in-name chapter 74 . 8/2/2016
Uh, wow, this is probably the most through and deep journey into Raonar's mind...and not only his mind.
And it was awesome, obviously!
The 'new' arm Fergus received, as well. Although for some (twisted) reason I imagined it as a claw, actually...
And I see you so beautifully involved some of the Inquisition elements in this: Veilfire for one and war table for second.
And that reminded me, lecturing Raonar used holograms to show Faren DNA? No?
| Elven-in-name chapter 73 . 8/2/2016
Wow, this chapter is great. Amazing, really.
But before I get to the good part, I want to 'complain' again that all that interesting talk about 'reality' and stuff confused me again. Yeah, I'm dumb.
But anyway I wanted to mention the great theory (you) Raonar had: that dwarves might have been the ones to start the Blight. And the question raised by Honor about what or who killed the Archdemon Dumat, if a Grey Warden is required to kill Archdemons and Grey Wardens are made with an 'Archie' s blood/essence...that's brilliant too. I wonder how I didn't even wonder about it?
And I liked Raonar's mention of alchemy or chemistry, more likely.
Theron's POV was good, too. So was the warning note/end chapter sequence.
And Wynne's Journal is as helpful as ever.
Wow, the realization of Dwarven Home Base was enlightening if not raising more quetions than answering. So was Faren's identity 'power', but that as I said was also confusing. A bit.
Raonar's Ten Tennets are somewhat hard to abide by in Real life, but if even now he claims not to be altruistic, I...I don't know.
Dammit, Theron is such a freak! First was watching people get naked in spirit-walking and now he's following Faren throught the forest by tree branches? Damn, if I were Faren I'd ready the lemonade 'cause the elf's getting into lemon TERRITORY.
| Elven-in-name chapter 72 . 8/1/2016
Heh, this was a good chapter, babe!
First, with the bad parts. 'Bad news' as it were...
I understand that the Ashes were to cure Fergus and Raonar primarily, then Aemon? And if that's so, the meeting with Bhelen did in fact not help at all? As I understood, it was 'foul play' to have Honor heal Rao...
Enough of that...
So, foreshadowing what Faren did or attempted was quite obvious and I dare to affirm, brilliantly set.
First, the fact that he was left behind, and then the pilfering of the plot item...
And the fighting, see, that's some awesome fighting babe. The only minor regret is that Oghren indeed did not participate as it was 'an enemy worthy(of him)'. Well, that and the usual fact that I send him to kick ass with the Ageless, which does similar damage to Yusaris in-game...
| Elven-in-name chapter 71 . 8/1/2016
I have to tell you that I loved this chapter. But I hated myself for how frustrated I feel for some of it's parts.
Still, it's one of those chapters I'd return to read, so there goes.
Although, this time I do need some conclusion.
Ah, thank you. I thought (silly me) that you had Bhelen all but forgotten, or made him come back for some tongue lashing as parts of the dialogue at the beginning implyed, but here they are, brothers, Raonar and him, together.
(sniff) yeah, dude!
Ah, and the realization/interpretation of Fade rules by Raonar got me so excited as there is hope after all.
And then...I got confused again. I started feeling that either your interpretation and extended use of metaphysical/magic rules to explain lore and usual rules makes it too complicated to understand something (make that some things)...or I am simply too dumb to understand something. Or all things.
(sigh) Either way, that doesn't change how epic this is (as a whole) and this chapter is particularly good.
Alas, I must ask: so Bhelen got harbored(make that 'welcomed') into Honor realm and there's where they talked all that? I thought it was Raonar's Realm/his inner realm...
And who came to distract Raonar? His dad?
And is Raonar going to keep being a Grey Warden without all the pit falls of that? (like taint timer to die) Coincidentally when he admitted to Bhelen his inability to father dwarf-cubs?
That aside, is it even fair to other Wardens?
Oho, get ready to get flamed...if that's the case! But not by me, I won't bother...
Oh, well, at least the angst cloud dissipated, right? (Oh, Faren, come're boy!)
And I felt incredibly glad to stumble upon that familliar expression: leg in the grave. Yeah...
| Elven-in-name chapter 70 . 8/1/2016
Okay, this was one of the strangest/most difficult chapters to read that there is( for me, at least)! Oh, how I hate Mondays...
I am not being too hard on you because I had my sister to give attention too, and she was asking 'what is this', and stuff. But I have to admit, the fighting scenes are boring. Not just here, all throught the fic.
It is my theory that I actually find them boring because I want to skip them and get to the 'better' part which is whatever comes after fights.
I like most of them, but I also find them somewhere/somehow boring.
If it gets too complicated, my brain has that reaction. Still, most of the fighting here was pleasant, and the point of view was pleasant with Alistair as lead.
I think I liked it better than when Raonar's point of view offers the battle scenes, because somehow what he does (or did) is always unbelievable.
Unbelivably cool and hard to imagine.
Still, as I said, here Alistair was better.
And unless particularly detailed fight scenes demand Raonar as a protagonist(which might happen), don't do it. Pick someone with better chances to look badass without much mojo, and little effor as possible. It might be wrong, but that's my advice...
And the situation got better after the fight broke and Zevran got the POV.
Even the Arcane Warrior fight was nice...
I found an error here, the orb of ashes was Fran's right? Here it says it was Owain's.
What does pandemonium mean? Chaos?
And Theron keeps bugging me off! What the hell is he?
About character development, I don't know about future chapters, but I think Kallian's been ignored lately. Seriously.
The chapter got better near the end, but it got strange and confusing with the spirit/wraith thing and Raonar.
*Raonar is such a coward for not daring show his dick!