|Reviews for Zoids: Adeianos|
| DGRAYLIGER chapter 2 . 1/30/2012
You. Killed. Raven.
*dies a little inside*
I like the OC you introduced. He sounds so... so... MOÉ XD he sounds incredibly cute.
| DGRAYLIGER chapter 1 . 1/30/2012
What I think is that if Raven died you will have some trouble with me young lady!
Nah kidding XD but you certainly know how to get your readers' attention from the beggining teehee.
BTW, a baby... isn't Raven a minor e_e?
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 11 . 8/13/2011
Well, I hope that the new story will be longer. This was a tad short IMO.
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 10 . 6/6/2011
So, this is a end then?
Well, I'm glad to see you'll still keeping this alive. Good luck on your new chapters!
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 9 . 5/3/2011
A few grammar errors, as well as spacing, but still good. I like how the gang is all together now.
| KaiVinci chapter 9 . 5/3/2011
a little slow, but at least now the gang of five know. i wonder if the schubaltz's will find out. it's going to be kind of crazy with raven's son amongst them. wonder how they'll handle the loyalists too. update soon!
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 8 . 4/2/2011
Still, good story.
I'd suggest making Zoids and Zoidians with a capital Z, but, that just me. Kinda a purist with it.
Anyhow, keep up the good work!
| randomcat23 chapter 8 . 4/2/2011
Haha, Adler and Gil are brothers? Crazy. Though I'm surprised they haven't had any bad blood...I hope we can find out more about their past.
And I think it's fair that Van and Fiona still don't want to take in Leith. But it'll be interesting to see what happens to the kid.
Good luck with the next chapter!
| randomcat23 chapter 7 . 3/29/2011
Ah, I thought so! So Reese and Raven are his parents. It's interesting to me how you've characterized Leith...he doesn't seem to understand basic conversations. Hmm, more questions to be answered.
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 7 . 3/28/2011
Ah, glad to see this fic is still alive and well.
You have a few errors, but overall, it's still good. A suggestion on my part, but maybe have a bit more Van/Fiona? Just a thought.
Keep up the good work.
| Zoids Fanatic chapter 6 . 1/14/2011
Well, so far I'm liking the story. It has it's mystery in it, but, for me, it's kinda predictable. Don't get me wrong, I like it, but it seems, well, predictable. And short.
But, don't think I'm flaming, I like the fic, and just giving my view. Keep it up!
| randomcat23 chapter 6 . 1/14/2011
Hmm, new characters, new information. Chapter was a tad on the short side, but good job. And good luck with the next chapter! :)
| randomcat23 chapter 5 . 9/12/2010
Good chapter! So we're finally learning more about Leith. I'm sure you'll reveal more soon. Can't wait!
One thing though. A lot of your sentences are run-on's. This sentence that begins: "Not much, no clues where the Zaber or the boy came from..." definitely needs to be broken up into a few sentences. Just remember: At the end of a complete thought put a period. :)
Good luck with the next chapter! I'm looking forward to reading it.
| randomcat23 chapter 4 . 9/2/2010
It's good to see another chapter from you! I can't wait to see what the boy's history is, now that we are finding out little pieces.
Good luck with the next chapte!
| HeartlessNeoshadow chapter 3 . 7/10/2010
Funny how the physical description you gave that kid makes him sound familiar...
Anyway, you've got a very interesting plotline. The problem you have, though, is your usage of commas. There are several places where you should be using periods instead to create better reading flow. These are identifiable by when you read through it and notice that your breath can only go so far when speaking. The other issue you have a little bit of is your lack of some scene description, which could be used to enhance whatever feelings or thoughts you're trying to convey.
But really, those aren't difficult things to fix. )