Reviews for Surprises can be deadly
Sally Shipton chapter 13 . 8/11/2011
come back and update please! i love it!
PrincessCoco05 chapter 13 . 7/26/2011
Great story since the beginning !

I wonder what will happen next...
Forever.N.Always.X chapter 12 . 11/9/2010
Aw nice ending. Is this the end of the story?
TorontoBatFan chapter 5 . 11/4/2010
Good chapter. Not as easy to review as Chapter 4 was. J/K. :-D

I think it's interesting that Alice regards her abilities as a curse rather than a gift. She's the only member of the family to have that viewpoint. Of course, she's the only one who really suffered in her human life because of them. To be honest, I think it was a mistake of Meyer to give the various Cullens these added abilities. They're already vampires with supernatural powers and near indestructability (they don't have the traditional weaknesses of vampire-lore such as sunlike, stakes, etc.). To give them too many powers reduces their interest as protagonists. (For example, Edward always comes off as smug -at least in the films- through his mind reading ability.)

I think that Alice regarding it as a curse actually gives her some emotional vulnerability. I think that's why she -along with Carlisle- are the most interesting characters in the whole saga. They come across as being vulnerable without being overtly helpless (Like Bella is in "New Moon". No offense, but she has night terrors over Edward leaving. She's not written as a terribly independent heroine.).

I must say, I was laughing out loud at Alec's point-of-view. He comes across as so twisted and evil that he veers over into the comedic. (It's how Smithers once described Mister Burns, "He crossed over from regular villainy into cartoonish supervillainy!" LOL) Oh, one point of criticism, it's generally better to denote a single unit as "one", rather than "1". I was chucking at his thoughts on Jane. He decides that he hates her. He wants to break her neck. Yet, he still misses her. I was howling at his memory of her pushing him of into a river after filling his shoes with stones. LOL You know, if they can't go back to the Volturi, they could hire themselves out as entertainers for children's birthday parties. (Can you imagine the act they would come up with?) LOL Or become a team of figure skaters in something out of "Blades Of Glory". LOL

Ohmy, and THEN his big revelation about his having fallen in love with Alice. (I presume Edward has learned this, but figures it's in everyone's best interest to t keep it to himself.) And his determination to outdo Jasper in doing romantic grand gestres department? I think Alec may have gone insane, a tad. LOL And his description of him having this black, black heart. That was truly priceless. He's so utterly in love with this image of himself as the grand villain that he's utterly self-delusional. (I imagine that if Alec could sleep he'd have dreams of Jasper tied to a table where a laser is about to cut him half. Jasper asks "Do you expect me to talk?", and Alec replies "No, Major Whitlock, I expect you to *die*!" LOL)

But alas, Jasper has one-upped him again, by calling Faye, on Alice's behalf. Of course, that could backfire on him. Alice could be angry at him for jumping the gun like that. Faye could -and if tells her the truth over the phone-(logically) assume that he's either insane or a friend of her's pranking him. (Hhe-heh. Or, Faye could do something even worse. She could decide Jasper is so cool after meeting him that she decides he HAS to come along with her to some concerts. Soooo, pretty soon Jasper is being dragged along to Justin Bieber and/or The Jonas Brothers. LOL)

Overall, this was a really good fic. Aside from changing the "1" to "one", there are no major bits I can think to change. As well, Alec's musings were quite funny. Does he know that Alice thinks of him as basically an idiot? LOL

Looking forward to reading Chapter 6 tomorrow. :-D
TorontoBatFan chapter 3 . 11/3/2010
Another fine chapter.

I can see that it's an interesting situation for Alice. It's different, yet strangely familiar. She wants to protect her family, yet this is the biological family that she has no memory of.

Now, the scenes with Nessie I don't feel qualified to comment on. I haven't read the books, so I don't know much about her character other than the basics (hybrid, accelerated growth, etc.) Where she's crying and Alice comforts her, I'm guessing that's because while she has the physical appearance of a twenty year old, she's emotionally still seven.

Alec is going to crash at the Cullens? That ought to be...interesting. LOL Will they insist that he follow their dietary rules? I wonder who will drive each other crazy sooner? ;-)

A good chapter overall. Nothing much in anything I can add to it. I hope I can help out more in the following chapters. :-D
TorontoBatFan chapter 2 . 11/2/2010
The plot thickens. :-D

I must say, this chapter is a great improvement upon the first. You seem to have gotten more into the flow of the story and descriptions just seem to be going more smoothly.

I was wondering, do you ever watch "True Blood" or read the Southern Vampire Mysteries series of books that the show is based on? I was wondering because the dynamic between Alice and Alec shown in this chapter reminds me very much of the Sookie/Eric dynamic in the TB/SVM series. That's a good thing, I might add, since Eric tends to get some of the best lines in the series. Like Alec, he makes blatantly inappropriate suggestions, often just to see the reaction.

So, this is an Alice/Alec story? Hmmm. Never read one of those. What's going to happen to poor Jasper? LOL

Oh, one thing to point out. Faye's surname would not likely be Brandon. Alice's sister would have taken her husband's name upon marriage, as would her daughter. So, unless Faye has reverted to the Brandon name for whatever reason, or Alec was just referred to her as Brandon so Alice would understand immediately the connection, her last name would not be Brandon.

Also, Alice would not use the term "BS" in her own internal monologue. People tend to be far more uncensored within their own thoughts, even if they don't always verbally express the words they're thinking.

Ohhh, did I see a nod to "Star Wars" in there? Where Alice orders "Emmett-release him." was just like Tarkin ordering Vader to cease his Force-strangulation of Tagge in Episode IV, "Enough of this! Vader...release him!"

I get the impression you don't like Rosalie too much. I was chuckling at Alice summing her up as "Plastic to the max." LOL

Well, this was a very fine chapter. I'm off to read Chapter 3 now. :-D
TorontoBatFan chapter 1 . 11/2/2010
An interesting first chapter. So far, there hasn't been too much in the way of vampire lore.

I do wonder what Alec is doing creeping towards the Cullen house. From what I know of the Volturi, they prefer a more blunt approach.

I did get a chuckle of out Alice's pride in Nessie's fashion sense. (I honestly think Alice is the best character in the entire series. She's a good contrast to the too glum for words, Edward and Bella. LOL)

Ironic, btw, that Bella isn't thrilled with Nessie's relationship with Jacob. (Hopefully Jacob will keep his shirt on at the party. LOL)

I did notice a few minor spelling and grammatical errors. Nothing major though.
iwokeuplikethis.flawless chapter 12 . 10/31/2010
I love it. All the jelious-ness[sp] and the heartfelt talk and alec slowly falling and everything else you can put in between the ands. Continue, author with a long pen name.
MsBookWorm7 chapter 11 . 10/26/2010
This chapter was awesome! I loved seeing Alec's background story. Update soon.

-your review buddy
Forever.N.Always.X chapter 11 . 10/26/2010
I really like this story... Unless Alice leaves Jasper cos he is the most amazing person EVER. ]
Squirrels1112 chapter 2 . 8/16/2010
oooo, i almost feel sorry for Alec! great chapter x
Squirrels1112 chapter 1 . 8/16/2010
finally i got around to reading this amazing story! To like or to love is the question but what is the answer? To love! x
adell's black fire chapter 10 . 8/10/2010
you siad review about ANYTHING soooo... I LOVE DOUGHNUTS! the glazed kind not the chocolate ones-dont get me rong i love those ones and also the tofee i think it is? but there sooooo goood! :{) hehehehe its a mustache smiley... yay
JessGranger95 chapter 10 . 8/10/2010
This is possibly the best fanfic I have ever read! I am absolutely astonished at how few reviews you have, though I have the exact same problem. I love the way you got Alice's sly sarcastic side, which I love so much. I also think your plot has amazing potential. I honestly don't have any criticism, it's amazing. I just ... only 15 reviews? It's mental. I think I'll review every chapter from now on, just to tell you how amazing each one is. Well, read you around x
Annonymous chapter 8 . 8/10/2010
I agree with JMan. This story is ace :) I hope that you keep writing cuz you r amazing- it doesnt matter what evryone else thinks you just know that your great and stuff the pricks who dont review - they dont deserve to read it if they arent even gonna be fair to you and review.
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