|Reviews for Kris vs Gold: A Tale of War|
| Guest chapter 16 . 7/11/2015
I really hope you'll write the epilogue soon. I always enjoyed this story and find myself coming back to it often. It would just be nice if it could be truly wrapped up.
| MountainLord-92 chapter 16 . 1/14/2013
I assume that the epilogue will be her battle with Lance, I shall look forward to that, I can tell already that it will be an epic battle.
This actually seems like a good place to end it, the budding romance with Spike has concluded, Kris has faced all her demons in facing the Hartleys and the problems she was facing over the championship are as good as resolved. Well they havent been resolved but she is ready to face them and we are left safe in the knowledge that she will resolve them. It ends with the readers hopeful for the future, and doesnt necessarily require an epilogue to tie it ll up.
I'm not that happy with the way you killed Persephone, you should have kept her alive and left her health issue as the one sad point for us to wonder about. I'm also not convinced that a cancer victim who was well enough to cook christmas dinner for her entire family would suddenly drop dead without any warning. On the flip side it does act as a strong contrast to the immediately prior paragraph of hope, which is quite well done.
| MountainLord-92 chapter 15 . 1/23/2012
well that was fantastic. i finally understand your portrayal of Gold, and i appreciate that you are completely bending traditional values.
i'm trying to understand how this fits in with your other stories, you seem to have seperate leagues for kanto and Johto whereas the games give them the same league. i only come to this conclusion because in 8 easy steps red is the champion, having become champion in redvsleaf, yet is not the champion here and doesnt seem to be credited as such. the only explanation i can think of is the one described above, or it is a poor continuity error; i hope it is the former.
i may be the only one but i felt a little bit of sympathy towards Gold with his oppressive father and miserable childhood that involved him being sidelined in favour of the other children, you can understand why he went mad so well done there.
it is a fitting end, even if you dont write an epilogue. but i do look forward to seeing what you have planned for that.
| RushedFast chapter 15 . 1/22/2012
I liked it mostly because of it being an adventure, but a reader brings up a good point of having them being extremes. I still wouldn't mind Gold being turned around into a better person, but this chapter kept me enthralled for the most part.
And now I know why I connect to Gold, because I have did EV training/competitive move sets, but I'm not that obsessive and I try to enjoy the game as well. I enjoyed both points of view and the plot for the most part and at least the villain wins part of the time without it being a tragedy.:)
| a reader chapter 15 . 1/22/2012
This story is good in terms of writing, description, and grammar, but absolutely biased and sexist in terms of characters. There are an equal number of stories in which the female protagonist is the champion, and the male is a supporting character. I wouldn't have minded a friendly battle, or Kris verses Lance with Gold as her friend. Making the 'hero' a abusive snobby brat is completely twisted. It's like making Kris the leader of Team Rocket!
This story is biased since you obviously portrayed Kris and Gold in a role you admire and effectively hate, respectively. Kris is a poor girl from a small town, who, against all odds, befriended a legendary, defeated her rich rival, became the champion, and earned the respect of countless authority figures, with no connections or wealth to back her up. Likewise, you made Gold a brat who has everything, abuses his pokemon, and wants to kill a random girl because she beat him. That is just messed up.
Finally, at the end, you show a flashback of Gold's parents talking about how he's a failure, and make the readers feel sorry for him. Then, you make Kris destroy his dreams (although this is understandable, since if Gold defeated her, it would have been Kris who would be crushed) and have him arrested after being publicly humiliated by a pokemon.
I'm not saying you should have made Gold the big hero and Kris, a nobody. I'm just suggesting that I would have enjoyed this story much more if Kris and Gold were both good guys and battled each other on their respective journeys. I'm not trying to bash Kris, I just dislike how you completely altered the Pokemon World.
You definitely have skill as an author, and I strongly suggest you keep on writing. Your punctuation, adjectives, length, and plot were well done and thought out, even if the last was rather unappealing. But, keep om writing stories!
As a last comment, DOWN WITH SOPA AND PIPA!
So yeah, I hope this review wasn't a waste of both of our time, so ta-ta!
| RushedFast chapter 14 . 12/20/2011
As sick as this may sound, but I love when Gold triumphs. It may be because he works hard or has a sick obsession of beating Kris, but every time it brings a smile to my face. It's like if I was in the situation I would do something similar. Sadly I don't think he will be winning in the final story unless I get surprised.
| MountainLord-92 chapter 14 . 11/30/2011
upload the document onto then click on edit/preview, in edit there should be a tool at the top called Insert Horizontal Line (next to Align Center). this will insert a horizontal line in the document.
i couldnt help but see parallels with star wars when Gold was saying that she should give into to her darkside, made me chuckle even if it shouldnt have done.
i look forward to the final part with anticipation.
| Guest chapter 13 . 10/24/2011
From being a rich and arrogant boy to a boy that wanted to know how to make his pokemon like him to having a crush on Kris to going crazy... I serious thought that Gold was going to change for the better by meeting Red or something but nope. He goes insane. He could have atleast became a better person by apologizing cause that is what a normal human does but nope, you turn him freakin' evil. Jesus, I can't read a story that turns Gold into this. It was fun while it lasted though...
| MountainLord-92 chapter 13 . 10/13/2011
Kris was a witness to Ruby's death and saw her run out in front of the car because Gold was chasing them, not because he pushed her. i refuse to believe that she could have not seen Gold pushing her if that was what had happened and i doubt she would forget something like that. if this was your intention all along you should have had Kris being a witness from afar so that she couldnt really tell how it happened, but as it is it just seems inconsistent and ridiculous.
| Dragonfire97 chapter 1 . 4/5/2011
When did leaf come into this?
| MountainLord-92 chapter 11 . 4/5/2011
after the previous chapter i felt a little sympathy for Gold and didnt like Kris' lack of empathy towards what happened to him. and i would have expected Gold to feel more guilty about the things said.
in the next chapter, he needs to learn the error of his ways and becomes a better overall character.
| kazorashi chapter 4 . 3/26/2011
I'm excited for the battle when Kris loses to Gold, I'll be honest(:. This fic is keeping me on my toes.
| kazorashi chapter 3 . 3/26/2011
My favorite Pokemon in this chapter HAS to be Teddiursa. Sure, he's a cutie, but I loved the attitude from Teddiursa, his battle with Kris's Chikorita was pretty amazing for me. So dark~~ (:!
| Heatman1991 chapter 1 . 8/31/2010
you've got me hooked since red vs leaf, you're battling descriptive is really nice. And i just like the tid bits of hints of couplings you do. i hope you do more next time.
| sierrap123 chapter 4 . 7/16/2010
Oh Gold, I just wish he was a tad nicer... Anyway~ could you please divide your paragraphs a bit more? You're like the greatest writer I've read stories from so far, but the way you space your paragraphs is sort of unappealing... sorry. _