|Reviews for Scare High|
| The Illegible chapter 1 . 8/2/2010
CHARACTERIZATION: Slightly mixed feelings on characterization. See, all the characters were fun and likeable (even Bo to a small extent—he was an evil bastard, but a FUNNY evil bastard), and even with the zany surrealism that colored the entire piece I still /bought/ them as people. The biggest crit I’ve got on characterization is that there were points where I believe the elements from Hair High overshadowed or jarred with Batverse. Some of this was Jonathan’s characterization—I believe the insecure nerd, his points of snark (“STUDY”) and slight snappage (e.g. sticking a toothpick in David’s eye/resurrecting) but I think he came across a bit too nice. Wouldn’t expect him to be the sort who picked fights or anything, but more snark and sarcasm even when he’s terrified would’ve helped me identify him better. Only sensing fear most of the time, no anger. Bo and Sherry were more natural because they weren’t explored much canonically (was happy to see Lacy!), the latter in particular with her scene in the church. That scene was hilarious, and I definitely caught the bad-girl/tease in her there. Felt like a mirror to the Halloween party.
INCORPORATION OF CANON: Related to characterization, I found the story overall very strong…just think a few more twists of Batverse would’ve made it stronger. It actually jerked me out a little bit to hear Gotham mentioned because I didn’t really sense that anything was happening in that verse. It’s not due to the surrealist nature of this piece so much as just needing more indications along the way—clear references to canon interspersed evenly with the Hair High stuff along with characterization and perhaps a bit more on backgrounds earlier.
MECHANICS: Small errors occasionally (“pleaded” should be “pled”, Bo exclaiming that he ran over “Sherry and Bo”—which I’m having a great time trying to picture but not sure how he’d manage, etc.), but overall very technically strong.
IMPACT: So I delivered a bit of crit, but gotta tell ya—the impact was great. I got immersed, I was excited to see what happened next, it was fun, and the whole thing just made me smile. XD Poor Jon got killed in both your fics, but at least here he got to be prom king with the girl of his dreams sans pig’s blood á la Carrie. Whole thing was strange, sweet, and satisfying. Not to mention funny as hell.
STYLE/TONE: VERY strong narrative voice! Your sense of humor came through brilliantly, and it helped make the surrealist angle of the peace flow naturally where other writers might have found it difficult. I had no difficulty diving into this world where anything and everything can happen—where you don’t need to ask questions or look for logic because it just IS. A little like a dream.
There were specific moments when your style came across especially beautifully too though. Parts like “A boy, probably not older but certainly taller, came in after her,” gave an interesting framework storytelling vibe, the embrace of casual language (Buffyspeak, not swearing XD), and some very sexy puns. You probably know what they are.
...*gives Dick a big hand*.
OVERALL: This was a well-executed, thoroughly entertaining piece. Incredible voice and tone, characters I care about, one marvelous trip with the surreal—definitely something I’ll remember and read again. Think it might have been stronger with more Batverse incorporated but the story and writing itself are both excellent. Awesome job!
| Pierides chapter 1 . 7/24/2010
CHARACTERIZATION: Sherry had a change of heart, but she was still Sherry: vain, snotty, a cheerleader, but she overcame herself in the end for Jon. Jonathan was the nerd, the awkward teenager, but you gave him an attitude. He was still fairly weak, but he wasn’t as pathetic as he’s often seen in canon. I really enjoyed the stronger Crane, especially when he and Sherry ruined prom! Ha! Bo was wonderful! You really went in depth with him. He was the jock; he was mean, ruthless, and egotistical. But most of all he was the crazy one! He went nuts! Bo was the prom night murderer and it was great! What a twist!
Your OCs rocked my socks, such creativity. I bow to you! I loved Merv, Darla, Cal, and all of them. They were like the sprinkles in my ice cream delicious!
INCORPORATION OF CANON: This was totally AU, and I loved it. Only you, once again could do this. And it worked, it worked wonderfully. The scenes were amazing and I found myself not caring that held little if any canon.
MECHICANICS: Can I be short and just say: Did nothing wrong. I envy your flawless sentences and dialogue. It was all amazing.
IMPACT: This is your ROMANCE! I died at that. The impact was that Romance equals ice cream! Okay, seriously, true love is amazing. It brought Sherry and Jon back from the dead, they exacted revenge and they danced! And they were in love! Like the flies! True love knows no power but its own. It is amazing. And I was very pleased with this.
STYLE/TONE: I seriously think that like your compliments of me for Melanthe only you could pull something like this off. Everyone has a certain style and this was amazing. Your tone was both morbid and humorous and only you could add them both together to make such a masterpiece as this. Forgive me for any typos, I’m running on little sleep.
OVERALL: I laughed, I cried, I blanched, and laughed some more. That was a trip! I feel like I’m flying off of some high and being sleep deprived whilist reading it made it all the better! Excellent and hilarious and cute. I loved all the symbolism, the innuendo, and all the craziness. I think I’m speechless but it’s a good thing. Sherry and her hairspray hair…Jon as a slave. It was amazing!