|Reviews for Darker Intentions|
| Hurricane Kazama chapter 2 . 9/27/2010
wow... an actual NCZ story that wasn't written in '03 or something. I must say, you made this thing pretty interesting by giving Zoids personalities and names. hope you update soon.
I didn't spot any major problems with the grammar and such, but couldn't the letter become part of the next chapter or something? I actually wanna know what it's about (tho i do know that it could be hard to write)
| Levells chapter 2 . 7/19/2010
This was good. Only a few minor spelling errors. I liked the battle.
About the letter and the footnote, maybe you could have worked it into a chapter later on? Kind of build some suspense?
In the beginning, the conversation between Laon and Brad could use a little work; it just needed to be broken up a little more. It seemed kind of like a bunch of run-on sentences. If you just break it up a little more, it would sound like something someone would say.
This was quite enjoyable to read. I look forward to the tournament, romance, and seeing how you've worked in the Republic and Empire.
| Sword of Protection chapter 1 . 7/11/2010
Very good story development in one chapter. Good descriptions of what was happening in an action scene. Communicative dialog between the Fox Zoid and it new driver/pilot.
| Levells chapter 1 . 7/11/2010
Oh, this definitely sounds like it's going to be good. I like the interaction between Wraith and Brad. While the battle/escape scene was short, it was still well written.
I'll be watching for the next chapter :)