Reviews for Breaking Wind
crazyartfreak chapter 1 . 3/16/2015
"I finally found a cure for my perpetual hard-on: Bella breaking wind."

"I hate him. It's official. Rosalie will have a eunuch for a husband by 9 a.m."

OH MY GOSH it is rare for me to laugh so hard that I cry when reading a story! Poor Edward; being assaulted by the toxic fumes of Bella's gas must be worse than Jane's sadistic gift. The rest of the Cullen's reactions were pretty dang funny, too!
I beg you to write a sequel to this crackfic. Maybe Bella's gift as a vampire proves to be humorous, in more ways than one. Perhaps, during stress or merely a defense technique, she releases an odor so horrible that everyone, including the Volturi, stays away from her. She'd be the immortal equivalent of a stink bug! :P
Snarry4life chapter 1 . 5/31/2014
Fucking hell, I laughed and laughed and choked, coughed and laughed some more!
tracyluvstwilight2010 chapter 1 . 2/24/2012
OMG I never laugh so hard. What a great one shot.
OcSickGirl chapter 1 . 2/21/2012
Had me lol!
VioletVirgo79 chapter 1 . 10/31/2011
Fucking hilarious!

dazzleglo chapter 1 . 8/8/2011
This was totally hysterical, my god Emmett just can't help himself. And the whole family hearing and clothespins on their noses, priceless.
SoCalTwiNurse chapter 1 . 6/29/2011
Ohmymotherfuckinggawd! I laughed soooo damn hard! Awesome & gross LOL
TwifanUK chapter 1 . 6/23/2011
Oh, that was brilliant. I can't remember the last time I laughed so hard reading a fic.

The singed eyebrow comment was fantastic but my fave part would have to be:

"I thought Jane's torture was bad, but this was almost strong enough to knock out one of us. At least once Jane stopped deluging your body with pain, it was done, Bella's dark gift would require airing out of the entire third floor, and possibly the rest of the house."

We're rec'ing this over on Giggle/Snort FB page right now as it's hilarious and is severely under-reviewed.

Loved it. :)
Viola Cornuta chapter 1 . 6/22/2011
ohhh the humanity!
Gasaway Alley chapter 1 . 6/22/2011
Oh good lord! That is so fucking funny I can't believe what I just read! We're rec'ing this over on the Giggle/Snort Facebook page!

My favorite: The symphony of flatulence started as soon as she was horizontal. - bwa ha haahahawahahwa! xoxo
robsessed1123 chapter 1 . 6/22/2011
that waz funny ass hell! epic

GoreLoverGirl69 chapter 1 . 6/16/2011
Too funny. UnderEZ are real..damn I thought you made that up.
IamTheAlleyCat chapter 1 . 2/10/2011
I was laughing so hard I was crying.

"The bear that killed him must have dropped him on his head a few times first. He probably annoyed it too." That is totally Emmet!

I can't believe he thought to call the pack, lmao! Poor Eddie!

I still can't get past the fact that Edward is more worried about his car than his private parts...

Carlisle was just the icing on the cake.

Wonderful crackfic!
misskma chapter 1 . 10/25/2010
So funny, thanks for lulz.

I loved The Acclimation Diaries and Miss Kitty. I really think you added to it.
FormallyKnownAsTeamBellaCullen chapter 1 . 8/16/2010
OMG hilarious ! I was laughing the entire time ! I swear, I almost fell out of my chair at one point ! Okay, maybe a few dozen points, but whatever. 5 stars, hands down !
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