Reviews for As Children After Play |
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![]() ![]() ![]() This is a feminazi’s wet dream. Over exaggerates on women’s troubles while belittling men’s. this author is a disgusting piece of shit. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Really? The whole “woman’s pain is so much worse then mans” bullshit. If you actually think that you should be institutionalize. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Great story. Thank you for sharing |
![]() ![]() I’m sorry ,but Bella is such a selfish and demanding girl. She doesn’t appreciate anything.I don’t understand why everyone thinks she is so wonderful. It’s kind of hard to believe. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Loved |
![]() ![]() ![]() I loved your story |
![]() ![]() ![]() good for rose |
![]() ![]() ![]() oh my I loved this chapter. I could see Charlies struggling to find his feet. and Bella's confusion. and Edwards power |
![]() ![]() ![]() Oohh, interesting! |
![]() ![]() Do you not know how to put blank spaces between the end of a sentence and the start of a new one. It's a grammatical rule to use two blank spaces when ending and starting new sentences. You're not using any which shows a lack of education. You can't just combine more than one word AND punctuation marks as if they are all one word. The first time I would have put it down to a one time typo, but you're quite consistent with this f-kup... You're also over and misusing the Colon and Semi-Colon, as well as over hyphenating words (some of which are never hyphenated and never have been). One is never used in a story unless there is a list or memorandum in the storyline, and the other is, but only rarely... |
![]() ![]() ![]() Fun story. Your Charlie was one of the most Hanalei fanficcharacters I've ever had the pleasure to read. Still wonder about Jacob ... and I do feel bad for him. Not the biggest Jacob fan, but I think he does deserve his hea too. At least you left it open ended. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Honestly I'm a bit disappointed she ended up murdering Frank. They easily could put him in jail for statutory rape. Its easy enough to prove they had sex. Given Bella's age they don't even have to prove there was no consent. |
![]() ![]() ![]() I feel bad for Jacob. Not that I don't completely sympathize with Edward wanting a suitor for his 2 year old daughter, but he didn't ask to imprint other daughter. Hessian if stuck with it. We'll see if fate was kind or not here. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Well, that certainly went more smoothly than Breaking Dawn. I wonder what sort of vampire traits she may have, if any. And of course there's the potential of Jacob and imprinting. We'll see if that becomes an issue. |
![]() ![]() ![]() Part of me wanted to read Charlie go on trial, but this was probably better. For everyone. Hopefully the wolves won't be a problem. |