|Reviews for Sword x Sword|
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 3 . 11/24/2010
Remind me to watch out when Satori say "lolita". Don't want to fall for that.
And neither does Henix. After all, the Hell Caverns are fairly close to the Palace of Earth Spirits, and that means the Hellfire Fortress is too. T_T
Now I know why Rika and that annoying celestial are friends.
| The Hexagonal Donut chapter 2 . 11/24/2010
Good thing Henix isn't present. Not only does he have a VERY powerful sword, but he also could REALLY mess up the storyline. D:
Very interesting so far.
| TakerFoxx chapter 3 . 10/20/2010
Okay, the first suggestion I have would be to work on the narration. There's a tendency to tell the reader what happens instead of showing it. As a result, it feels really rushed at times. Added with the fact that everything is in present tense, sometimes it felt more like a script than a prose story. Slow down, take some time to visualize the scene and work on your pacing. Likewise, don't overcompensate by bogging it down with details. Balance is the key.
Speaking of characters, there are several times when several seem to just pop up out of nowhere and either get involved in the action or wander off, even when they didn't need to be there. I know we're already familiar with the series and associated characters, and I know this is a spin-off of a previous story, but I've always felt that side-stories should be able to stand on their own. And it would help the pacing to give these characters just a little bit of introduction.
Also, I'm seeing a lot of smiling and/or smirking going on, especially from Tenshi. I know she's rather smug at times, but there were times where I'd catch two paragraphs in a row starting with "Tenshi smirked" or something to that effect.
But it's not all criticism! The sword-spirit fellow was a pretty cool character, and I also liked Tenshi's reaction to the flashback of her first meeting with Rika as well. Nice work with the emotion there.
| Touhou Famcom chapter 3 . 7/21/2010
I must say,I really completely Enjoyed this Chapter even more so then the last,it was soo good that it had me almost Crying at some points!
truly a very fine piece of work there,and I am totally overjoyed that I think I will re-read this over some few more times...it was THAT good,and trust me,you did more then just a good job :)!
by the way...ahh..I think Iam as confused as Satori is(I hope I am not losing my mind) but when what Orin and Yamame said happen again?(I might consider this as a joke after a while,because my Brain still couldn't comprehend what Orin and Yamame said)
anyway,thank you got this short,but VERY lovely spin-off,your a great Author,keep up the good luck,and I cant wait for you next work :)
| Touhou Famcom chapter 2 . 7/21/2010
now this is a VERY nice Chapter that most filled with action and funny moments.
I totaly Enjoyed it from the start to the very end,and the verity of jokes in this one is much Original as well as fun to read(I had quite the few laughs myself :D)
it builds Tension at some points in this Chapter while releasing them with funny moments,but then pulls you back in for more,quite a nice Strategy there,and again,you keep Impressing me to no ends!
keep up the good work and good luck with end of this Spin-off :)
| Touhou Famcom chapter 1 . 7/17/2010
Alright! a new spin-off! with a nice start too!
quite a well done first Chapter,left me very interested till the end,not to mention I get the feeling there will be more to that Chase then just that
and Tenshi is getting some spot light!
cant wait for the next Chapter! good luck and keep up the good work just like always :)